This was supposed to be a public post, one of my classic, tightly scripted, well put-together editorial stink-pieces, the first in quite a while. I don't do these as often nowadays, for a few reasons. Reasons like...
- i'm busy,
- it's a huge pa...
2020-07-01 00:03:55 +0000 UTC View Post
I first picked up Phantom Brave for the PS2 at a random hole in the wall game store, with no prior knowledge of it beyond the cutesy box art. Its a Nippon Ichi Tactical RPG like Disgaea, except Disgaea is more like DisGAYa because it's totally lame and Phantom Brave is a million times cooler, eve...
2020-06-01 03:54:12 +0000 UTC View Post
This is a Farming Simulator 2019, which for some ungodly reason was released as the free psn club game for May. That thumbnail alone should give you an idea of what we're dealing with here, but trust me, nothing can truly prepare you for the Pandora's Box that is this unholy simulation.
... 2020-06-01 03:29:19 +0000 UTC View Post
Consider this my review for now, this rambling stream-of-consciousness/ diary of a crazy man is exactly the review FF7 Remake deserves, not so much a formatted exploration of pro's and cons as it is an exorcise in oh my god fucking whatever god who fucking cares.
Ok I'm gonna level wi...
2020-06-01 03:01:40 +0000 UTC View Post
Great. Terrific. Peachy. I spend all month filming wacky Corona Virus quarantine videos, and all it took was one day for everyone to forget about the stupid fake virus in favor of the shiny new fake race war.
And don't get your panties in a twist over me calling those things "fake". O...
2020-06-01 02:12:52 +0000 UTC View Post
This may come as a shock to you all, but i have a deep passion for creating really stupid characters. They're like my children, you see. And like every parent, i have my favorites, and my not-so favorites. The honor role students who make me proud, and the embarrassments who i must disown in a ra...
2020-05-01 03:58:16 +0000 UTC View Post
Here's a game that was hyped to the moon for like 10 years and then came and went like a wet fart. Who can say why. Maybe the critical reception wasn't good enough, or maybe it simply took too long and nobody cared anymore. Personally I blame the fact that it came out in 2016, which ...
2020-05-01 03:34:52 +0000 UTC View Post
The Dorksiders series has existed on the periphery of relevance for years. There always seems to be a new one of these being talked about, but never by anyone you care to listen to. Presumably it has fans, but i've never met these people in person, nor do I wish to.
Here's me finally ...
2020-05-01 02:37:30 +0000 UTC View Post
Why yes, I do hate myself for making that joke. Thanks for noticing. I was bound to do this bit eventually, and i'm the only one who can do it right, so let's just get it over with.
Hideo Kojima is a man who i consider my brother in the struggle, as we both suffer from the same debili...
2020-04-30 01:49:09 +0000 UTC View Post
Oh hey, you know that horrible e-celeb podcast that i'm sort of a part of some of the time maybe? The one that i never actually joined but somehow congealed around me like an unshakable fungus and sent my entire life spiraling into a twisted, toxic Twilight Zone that i can't seem to ever escape f...
2020-04-29 01:58:22 +0000 UTC View Post
Gimme a hell yeah! It's that time again. No, not the end of the world, i mean yes also that, but the important thing is it's Wrestlemania Time again. The show must go on. Nothing stops Vince and nothing stops me.
When civilization is ash and society collapsed, when the world of man is...
2020-04-13 18:30:13 +0000 UTC View Post
It's finally happened. After all these years you finally get to see me play Demons Souls a little bit. The game that literally launched my career, and propelled a young drowning in footwear to the 500 subscribers and TGWTG forum clout that remains the only level of fame i've ever been happy or co...
2020-03-31 10:49:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Okay so get this, remember when Scott Pilgrim was a thing? Remember those glory days when us millennials were just coming into our 20s, and funny Nintendo jokes like "Sex Bob-omb" were still charming and cool, and there was still some color and hope in the world because the president was black an...
2020-03-30 04:22:28 +0000 UTC View Post
Hey, remember when i used to make music? Well I still do, but i used to too. That's a reference, not a theft. Here's a disgusting, grimy, filthy, vile, ugly, hideous, stupid, stinky, slimy, sludgy, grungy, scummy, fugly, pug-fugly, fug-nasty, ass-crapping corona-virus rap song made specifically f...
2020-03-29 02:30:56 +0000 UTC View Post
This is one of my favorite games ever, watch me suck at it!
and i mean literally watch me, because there's a camera feed in this one awkwardly taking up half the screen. So you can see me.... sitting! Truly, we are living in the year 2525.
God, I had the most terrible nightmare. I dre...
2020-03-28 22:11:24 +0000 UTC View Post
Oh shit this is almost out and i forgot to post this. Blah Blah ff7 im old and everything new sucks. The Remake is going to be terrible. Yada Yada I told you so whatever.
Here's me playing the demo to see what they screwed up so far. The answer is exactly what i thought they would. I'...
2020-03-28 08:52:14 +0000 UTC View Post
Go to Radcon 4 they said, Hang out with the Pro-Crastinators they said. Those guys are your friends. It'll be fun. You'll get some work done. You'll go to the fan meetup. You might even get paid a little. What's the worst that could happen?
Smash cut to me stranded at a bu...
2020-03-27 22:15:54 +0000 UTC View Post
Baby i got so much content, you don't even know. I got content for days. You think i just sit around scratching myself in odd places? Hell no. I'm grinding 24/7 365.
I been playing games, i been recording games, i been recording myself saying stupid shit on top of those games. I've be...
2020-02-29 20:03:03 +0000 UTC View Post
I've done it, I've discovered the secret to ultimate content creation. I call it the "Only Do One Take No Matter What" method. Here's how it works, instead of taking forever to get one thing done because i want it done right, i get it done immediately by only recording one t...
2020-02-29 19:26:49 +0000 UTC View Post
You heard me. That's my new profession, that's my new calling, that's my passion and my life's work. I'm an underwater science man makin batteries out of fish, and no one can stop me. No one can tell me what to do because i got this whole damn spooky scary alien planet to myself. Everyone else is...
2020-02-29 04:59:16 +0000 UTC View Post
The Mystery of Shit House has plagued Cody La Rue for 7 joyless years. Here's what we know. On Halloween night, 2013, a party was held at young master Cody's abode. A great number of people attended. Friends, friends of friends, and perhaps even some strangers.
The madness and debauch...
2020-02-28 20:21:47 +0000 UTC View Post
This is a game i hadn't previously heard of and don't even remember buying. It just showed up installed on my ps4 one day. Spooky. It's actually pretty cool. An old school Clocktower style run around and hide from the ugly dude kind of game.
Of course the game is obscenely frustrating...
2020-02-01 04:56:21 +0000 UTC View Post
Oh crap, remember when i was playing the Shadow of The Colossus remake a while back? Well somehow i forgot to ever post the last 2 parts where i actually beat the game, so here they are. They're both completely insane, too! Hooray? I guess this game just brings out the cool in me.
If ...
2020-02-01 04:38:18 +0000 UTC View Post
This game straight up has a character in it named Dudu. I'm not pulling your leg here, they dead ass thought they could get away with putting a guy named Dudu in this epic quest. This is the Witcher 3, man. This is an epic adventure, a bardic tale for the ages. But every so often a character says...
2020-02-01 01:02:13 +0000 UTC View Post
Ha. You thonestly thought i not make a video this month? I always come through. I did a Whole fucking video review thing. I spent the first half of this month on a train. It was sort of a cosmic trip through the outer dimensions, m...
2020-01-31 16:18:47 +0000 UTC View Post
Years ago, I put together a video called "Christmas Specials That Rule", which despite being one of the most immaculately written and performed retrospective videos in the history of youtube was immediately taken down by the copyright police and has been languishing in obscurity on Dailymotion ev...
2020-01-01 04:21:15 +0000 UTC View Post
DeathStranding: Will I beat it?
Here’s a new series that will never be continued, unless it is. It was inspired by me compulsively taking notes on a game i was playing, but not wanting to record any footage, so instead i went on a goddamn nature hike. Kinda like that Breath o...
2019-12-31 18:47:57 +0000 UTC View Post
Hey here’s a video wow holy crap. CoOL.
I’m on a train, i haven’t slept in like 40 hours, and i’m too high on train drugs to write this, so it’s just gonna be a weird rambling something or other. They don't even got wi-fi on here so by the time you read this i'll be l...
2019-12-31 14:06:52 +0000 UTC View Post
Another year on Earth, another year for the soft peasants of this world to cry out for a savior. "Who can beat The Lion King?" they beg, "its the hardest game EVER!" they lament from their padded nurseries of complacency and dilapidated bunkers of fear. Oh, how they sicken me.
Neverth...
2019-12-29 06:32:02 +0000 UTC View Post
Hey, remember adventure time? Well here's that, but a video game... and it rules. I don't know what more to say about it really. You play as Finn and Jake and you sail around Ooo like the the fuckin Wind Waker singing sea shanties. It's clearly the best game ever made.
This right here...
2019-12-01 04:58:52 +0000 UTC View Post