Investing in the Arts (Statue TF, Minionization)

Jolene O’Hare sat in her office late in the night, rain pattering on the window, shuffling through her papers. As the finance minister of a city with constant shifts in priorities and budgetary needs in response to the activities of villains, she was used to late nights, but even then that didn’t make the one she was staring down any better. She was presently set to figure out how to balance the budgets taking into account that a significant chunk of one of the wealthiest sections of the city had declared itself an independent state under some… red baroness or something like that, supervillain names were weird… and had stopped paying taxes three months before. She desperately hoped that the heroes would take her down soon, if only to make Jolene’s job a bit less headache inducing.

Well… she didn’t like to do it, but she thought that the art budget would need a cut. The superhero support budget was all but written into law - when supervillains are running around in the open, you don’t exactly want to give them an easier time. Sciences were staying where they were. Education was too important to cut, even if she couldn’t give it the budget increase she and the mayor had hoped to for this quarter… well, it had to be the arts. It was painful, and once the books were balanced a bit she’d be sure to restore the funding, but as it was she had little choice.

She was noting down her proposals when she scooted her chair a bit to the side, to get out of the rain. As she pushed her glasses up from where they’d slid down in the motion, she froze. Her window had been closed, hadn’t it?

Someone was in there with her.

She acted as if nothing was wrong for a moment, shuffling her papers again and moving as if to put them into her desk. But when she pulled out the drawer, she hit the hidden alarm button with one hand, while the other found the stun gun she’d kept in there - in a city full of supervillains, government officials were prime targets.

The stun prods found their mark, jolting the shadowed figure around. Unfortunately for her, there were two. As the first shook off her stun, the second lunged and caught Jolene’s wrist, tearing the stungun from her grasp.

One figure was pink, glittery angelic figure wearing the barest minimum of armor to be called such, and even then it was a close run thing. The second was a woman in insectoid themed, albeit still skimpy, latex clothes, with wings to match. The two looked… just subtly wrong. Like they weren’t quite in the same plane as the rest of the world, like animated characters projected into the three dimensional world.

“Awww, Glitter Angel, I knew she’d noticed us…” A feminine voice said, as strong hands wrenched Jolene out of her chair. She found herself over a woman’s shoulder, face stuffed into rubbery feeling wings.

“Latex Moth, if you’d known, you would have done something sooner!” Another voice replied. “Come on, Mistress will be waiting for us! Oooh, I’m so excited, we did such a good job…”

“I bet he’ll praise us more~ We could do no less, being the Artist’s lovely masterpieces… wait, we almost forgot the note!” Latex Moth paused, scrawling out a note.

Glitter Angel looked it over. “You think they’ll get it?”

“Do you think we have time to rewrite it? I hear them outside!”

By the time the door burst open and men came in with guns at the ready, the villains were gone, and the finance minister with them. A hastily written note was on the table. “WE HAVE UR MONEY LADY. GIVE MONEY AND SHE COMES BACK. -THE ARTIST”

The minions were sloppy, Jolene noted. They didn’t mask her to keep where they were going a secret. They didn’t seem to care that she not only saw who they were and who they worked for, but the route to their base. She’d expected the art museum after hearing the name of their Mistress, but they passed right by it. Of course, that made sense - after losing a few pairs and solos to the growing numbers of minions, they’d held off to send in a full team. But by the time they’d arrived, the museum was emptied of every work of art on display, and in storage too. It was one of the most comprehensive art heists the city’s law enforcement had seen, if not the most.

Where they ended up going was an old factory in the industrial district. Not the sort of place you’d expect an ‘Artist’, of course, but that was probably the point. It really was sloppy of these minions to let her see this whole thing…

Or maybe it wasn’t, and they just knew that she wasn’t going to be ratting on them any time soon.

When they went inside, she saw it wasn’t nearly as ratty and decrepit as it looked on the outside. It was very carefully laid out. The entire facade had been left in its original, ruined state. Anything you could see through a window or open door at any angle was much the same. But the moment you stepped out of those lines of sight, you stepped into another world. The place was plastered from floor to ceiling in paintings, most that Jolene recognized as stolen from assorted museums, but some were apparently original works.

“Ah, do you like my work?” A woman’s voice said, “I call this exhibit… ‘art in the wild’. It’s such an unexpected place for beauty, that it enhances it all the more. And besides, the art is happy here. Happy to be viewed only by those who appreciate it’s worth and importance. Don’t you think, Miss O’Hare?”

It was a woman… probably? The Artist seemed to be almost made of canvas, her skin paper white except for where fresh paint stains splattered it in kaleidoscopic patterns. She lacked most identifying features except a mouth, and wore only a painter’s smock. It was difficult to tell if this was an elaborate costume, or the real her - or perhaps the former was so attached to her identity that the difference was moot.

“Very pretty. Let’s cut to the part where you tell me why I’m here. I saw your minion writing a ransom note. Crude, but not easily mistaken for other things.”

“Ah, that? Well, forgive me the lie. I have no interest in returning you, money or no. It’s simply a ploy to make them believe there’s a chance, and buy time.” The Artist shrugged apologetically, “Ah, the things we do for our crafts.”

“Why am I the target of this, anyway? What does an artist care about money, if you’re being honest?” Jolene said. Maybe if she kept the Artist talking, she’d buy enough time for a hero rescue before she got to… whatever it was she planned.

“I don’t, this is true. But the arts are important to support! To encourage children to experience it’s wonder, to finance the creation of more art… to turn a place into the art capital of the world, nay, the galaxy, a single woman’s muse is inadequate. And while I may live solely on my craft, my more worldly counterparts are unfortunately unable to do so. And so, to cut my tale short, I need a woman who understands in charge of budgeting. The heroes don’t need their untold millions when artists are in need, for instance - there are many nonessentials currently favored over art!”

She shouldn’t have been surprised to speak to a nutcase, but with how coherent the minions could think compared to most, Jolene had almost wondered if she’d been captured by the rare sane villain. Alas, she was as mad as a hatter. “And so you kidnap the finance minister, seeking to convince her. I see where this is going.”

“Oh dear, I mustn’t become predictable…” the Artist mused. “What do you believe I’ll do to you? I’ll concede you that your future status is that of a fellow art lover, but that is something of a foregone conclusion in any case. What do you think I’m going to do?”

“Besides turn me into one of your minions? I frankly don’t know. Paint me into a caricature of myself like you did these two?” She gestured to the two ditzy, skimpily dressed former-heroes.

“Hm… close! You’d make a wonderful painting. But an artist cannot simply remain static and unchanging. I must branch out! Try new styles, new mediums! I think I could practice my sculpture work… but firstly, we need proper material!”

Jolene tried to move, but Latex Moth kept her firmly in place as the Artist whipped out a new paint brush. She struggled in the minion’s grip as the Artist dipped the brush in a thick, metallic-looking liquid.

The artist closed in, and painted her first stroke with almost a flourish. Jolene’s struggle ended abruptly as a slash of gold paint streaked across her body, including her face. Wherever it touched, her body suddenly seemed harder, metallic. Latex Moth withdrew, and Jolene didn’t move. Internally, she could still somewhat struggle - but she was utterly unable to move, or even change her now-frozen expression.

The Artist kept up the painting, a bit more careful now. She made sure to smooth down Jolene’s ruffled hair before she painted it over and solidified it in gold. She used her fingers to make small adjustments to Jolene’s expression on either side of the metallic gash through the middle of her face, before freezing that too in a forced smile.

After that, she moved down, adjusting Jolene’s posture and pose to her liking as she coated her in more and more gold. “For someone who works with money,” the Artist said, “I felt that gold would be most appropriate. It was quite difficult to create this paint, but it was obviously worth the investment! Humans make the best material - nothing else can quite capture the emotion, the personality, of a real person. There’s something more than physical to those works of art that were once human beings.” The madwoman raved as she pulled Jolene into a lurid, inviting pose while painting over her torso.

As the paint settled in, Jolene realized it was seeping below the skin. With every passing second, her body was becoming more and more gold. She was getting… heavier, denser, as her body filled in and froze solid. The two minions helped keep her upright as the Painter worked, until she was a statue inside and out. Nobody who hadn’t seen it happen would believe Jolene had ever been anything but solid gold… at least, if they didn’t know how villains usually worked.

“Ah… beautiful…” The Artist said. “If I had no further plans, I’d quite enjoy to keep you like this. But the greater good must be served - if I must conceal one of my best works in the name of the future, then it must be done. Glitter Angel, please assist me…”

The new statue was carried to a back room, holding a strange machine. Jolene was set down onto a pedestal on top of the machine. “Alrighty then!” Glitter Angel said as she put down the statue - she hadn’t lost any of her strength in her conversion. “Now what, Mistress?”

“Light it, if you please, Latex Moth.” The Artist said. “Rejoice, friend. While you may not retain this form, this mind, I swear on my artistic integrity that you will be beautiful!”

The second minion giggled, and did as she was told, using another machine (one from the old days of being an icky male hero) to set the burner beneath the pedestal alight.

Jolene felt… weird, as she started to sink down. She was melting. She felt the intense heat all around her, and within, but it didn’t hurt. It felt… really nice, as she became a puddle below the knees, and parts of her body dripping and sloughing off as she exceeded her metal’s new melting point. It was… relaxing. She found herself letting go. Letting go of herself, her very mind melting away to nothing.

By the time her face faded into the pool of gold, that was all it was - a thick pool of gold. The Artist flipped a switch, and the pedestal suddenly moved, part of it raising so that it was at an angle, pouring it’s contents into a mold. The mold closed, and for a few moments it glowed blue as magical cold swiftly solidified the molten metal into its new shape.

The mold opened, and something stepped out. A living sculpture, in the shape of a woman. It certainly wasn’t Jolene, but it’s form was recognizable as one based on ancient works of high art. “Mistress…” the statue said, in a low, sweet, seductive voice as she knelt before the Artist.

“Welcome to the world, my lovely Galatea…” the Artist said in reply, offering a hand to the statue.

The statue - Galatea, without a bit of Jolene left in her - took her hand and stood. She knew who she was. She was a masterpiece. She was the Artist’s masterpiece. She belonged to her creator in mind, body, and soul, a servant through and through. “I simply can’t wait to do your bidding, my beloved Mistress…”

“And I’m sure my newest creation will serve me well.” The Artist agreed. “But first, I must do one more regrettable thing.

She gestured, and Latex Moth stepped in front of her. “I understand, Mistress! Use me however you want!”

“This will be a tad uncomfortable. You will have to forsake your beauty for a time. But it’s for the future of art, so know that it will be worth it.”

“My only purpose is to serve, Mistress. If you command it, I will do it!” Latex Moth said.

“Or I could! I could!” Glitter Angel interjected.

From within her smock, the Artist pulled out a roll of canvas. With Galatea’s help, she wrapped Latex Moth in it completely, pulling it tight so it conformed to her body. Then, she went and gathered her paints.

The painting took over an hour, which was a long time for the Artist - she had to be sure to get every detail perfect. Every little mark and blemish, just the right tones. It was more muted and precise than she liked to work with - art should be expressive and free - but she did enjoy the challenge.

When she was done, Latex Moth was unrecognizable, even her wings hidden. In her place… stood Jolene again, the finance minister as she was when she arrived. From her cocoa skin, to her midnight black hair, to her amber eyes, it was impossible to distinguish the disguised Latex Moth from the real thing. Such was the work of an artist.

“Aw… I can’t believe that I have to cover up my beauty… but as always, Mistress, your work is divine.”

“Fear not, my masterpiece,” the Artist reassured, “Fortunately, she was quite beautiful as she was. It’s not as good as your true self, but for a human, she is quite lovely. You understand what I need you to do?”

“Divert funding to the arts! Anything that I can get away with needs to go to the arts! We practiced so much, I know all the big words and justifications!”

“Excellent.” The Artist said.

“I’ll miss you, Moth~” Glitter Angel said, trying to keep her cheer as her partner left them.

“Don’t be upset, Angel~ It’s only for a while…”

The next day, just as the news was reporting the finance minister’s disappearance, she turned up, saying she’d managed to escape due to a clumsy mistake on the villain’s part. When they investigated the place she’d said, they found evidence that there had been a lair there, but the villain had escaped, supporting her claim. As Jolene went back to work, nobody paid too much attention to the subtle shift in budget priorities, or the new collection of paintings she began to gather. After all, was it not perfectly normal for someone to enjoy the arts?

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Patron commission for Director, a sequel to one of their early patron commissions!