WIP- Sleepless Nights 17
Added 2019-02-14 01:18:55 +0000 UTCAs you can see, we've zoomed in on both characters on this page, which is why I needed to redraw the previous page so that we were zoomed out far enough to see both their bodies.
I'm still debating what dialog to give Cebron in panel 2 (since the original dialogue I had written, on second reading felt just a little rapey, so I binned it).
With that said, I really like the look of contentment Tsenaya's giving Cebron in panel 1...she's really enjoying this, even though she knows it's probably a bad idea. What's a girl to do? Her mom keeps killing other potential suitors!
Also that shot from underneath is basically my favorite shot in any porn ^_^;;
Comments
I AM AN INFLUENCE
Magitechnician
2019-02-17 15:12:59 +0000 UTCYeah, I think Nailah would have sung to Tsenaya, and it makes sense that Cebron would pick up on that and think that continuing to do it is somehow appropriate, even during sex? That's pretty cool to think about heheh. I took your suggestion and made him sing a little lullaby in the next page...I hope you enjoy it!
Scappo
2019-02-17 15:07:56 +0000 UTCFortunatly Nailah don't see that ^^'
Nïvhis
2019-02-14 21:55:01 +0000 UTCNo yeah it’d be weird, lullabies are for children and all - but maybe kinda fittingly weird? Djinn are supposed to have a kind of alien’s-understanding of hu... mortal culture, right? He might not get how that makes it inappropriate, perhaps he’s even just copying something Nailah used to sing her as a baby (Would Nailah have been that motherly at the time? Honestly a mystery to your readers! ) Now this would likely push the perception of Cebron towards pseudo-parental guardian rather than just her mother’s servitor - I figure you know which side of that fence you’d rather land on. It becomes... reminiscent of without actually being incest, so I get being wary of the idea. But it may also be why my idea seems to have been seconded. I’m ambivalent about it myself I was figuring it’d be sung a line at a time, text off in the corner of the panels or pages almost like a narration... which might mean it’d have worked better to start a few pages ago. So, to be clear, I’m not even sold on the idea myself - ironic for how much I’ve written about it but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s an idea
Magitechnician
2019-02-14 21:50:10 +0000 UTCEspecially fem PoV
Magitechnician
2019-02-14 18:28:05 +0000 UTCNoooo common im sure it would be perfectly fine for friendly secret bondage session. :) Also, i really dig Cebron. Best snake jhinn.
August kowalski
2019-02-14 16:27:45 +0000 UTCHrm...maybe? You don't think that would come off as a little weird?
Scappo
2019-02-14 10:44:30 +0000 UTCPOV shots like the first 2 is some of the most underrated stuff ever; really glad to see it here! ♥
Selin Malianis
2019-02-14 09:01:07 +0000 UTCI second Aktwins comment
Fyredrake
2019-02-14 04:36:07 +0000 UTCOoo i love these PoVs. And if Cebron needs dialogue... maybeee some kind of child’s lullaby in the setting? Might be an interesting writing challenge
Magitechnician
2019-02-14 02:25:46 +0000 UTCvery nice angle indeed
Synariel
2019-02-14 01:37:14 +0000 UTCThose POV panels look great. Gonna be an amazing page once it's done.
Darkhom
2019-02-14 01:26:57 +0000 UTC
