Sex, Masculinity, and What ‘Good’ Really Means – A Book Club Deep Dive
Added 2025-05-30 22:47:01 +0000 UTCWhat shaped your ideas about sex and pleasure? In this book club replay, we unpack early messages, masculinity, and what “good sex” means.
We cracked open Good Sex by Dr. Candice Nicole Hargons and dove into the first chapter: “What Is Good Sex & Why You’re Worthy of It.” 😍
Catch the replay to hear the convo, the takeaways, and why this read is already shaking things up.
See you in the comments, book lovers! 🫶
👀 P.S. Next chapter is Good Sex Is Intimate where we unpack the different types of intimacy and strategies for intimate sex. Yum!
Comments
Thanks for taking the time to listen and share your very thoughtful reflections so openly with us, Guy. I appreciate how you’re advocating for pelvic health within the cancer community and bringing personal and emotional honesty to this convo.
susie@drsusieg.com
2025-06-10 15:54:23 +0000 UTCOkay, I finally had a chance to listen to the book club replay. Lots to unpack here. First off, I have few if any boundaries when speaking to a shrink or trying to support other cancer patients. Some things may be very emotional but I grind it out anyway usually through gritted teeth. I am very open about the pelvic health experience with other cancer patients and their partners, routinely suggest it for their questions. I also feel that men should have an overall assessment before treatment to have a better reference point to progress in recovery. For me good sex is being one emotionally with my partner and giving her pleasure. I'm probably too serious with my wife, but we have photos to prove we've had at least one silly romp. The image of masculinity typically sees the man as dominant. He's the stoic protector / provider. This leads to some men feeling they are owed sexual favors by women. I had three partners before my wife. There was little or no emotional involvement as they or their girl friends had instigated hookups. At that stage I did not have any sort of need to earn it. This really sozzled my brain as I grew up thinking that women needed an emotional investment before becoming intimate. I understood that I had to build a meaningful emotional relationship that would lead to intimacy in a long term relationship. My definition of good sex has not changed. None of my experience taught me how to socialize around intimacy, flirt, etc. I didn't know how to take the relationship with my wife to be to the next level or even how to touch. I don't think I've ever had any sort of semi intellectual evaluation after intimacy. My wife was more experienced than I and I asked her to tell me what pleases her. Her response was, "Men know." I sure as hell didn't and felt I spent years fumbling to try to figure it out. I just recently pointed out that I'd had little experience and she seemed surprised.
Guy (works)
2025-06-07 03:56:13 +0000 UTCWe miss ya too, Steve! Maybe next time. x
susie@drsusieg.com
2025-06-01 21:10:33 +0000 UTCSorry I missed the live event, Dr. I wish I didn't have to work as I do.
Steve
2025-05-31 03:36:41 +0000 UTC
