Brewing Bad Ch. 146-147

Ch. 146 - Further Testing Required (part 3)

Once Lucas was no longer worried he was going to break something if he got out of bed, he got his ass in gear and back to work. The first thing he did was write a small note and tuck it into his window’s casing in case Danaria thought to look for him there. It was a long shot, but she was a smart girl, and he was sure it would occur to her to look for him eventually. 

If it didn’t, well, he had an idea about how to fix that too, but he wanted to give Heisenburgle a little more time to come around before he put any more plans in motion. For now, he had more important things to do, like making a body that could stand up to the limits of the potions he wanted to try. 

While he wasn’t sure having twenty endurance would offset twenty strength, he was pretty sure that it would. So, until experiments proved otherwise, that was his plan. 

Endurance potions weren’t exactly new to Lucas. He’d practically lived off Flasks of Long Lasting Curative when he was recovering from his freak owl bear accident, but he hadn’t made any of those in a while. This time, though, he didn’t want to make something long-lasting. He wanted something that would make him as tough as a dwarf, tougher, maybe. It didn't need to last too much longer than whatever strength potion he paired with it.

After his recent brush with human frailty, the idea of maxing out his strength or his agility without seriously reinforcing his body seemed like a terrible idea. Still, for those first few days, he stuck to inventorying ingredients as he studied his attributes. Strength actually turned out to be the thing that was easiest to increase, followed by agility, endurance, and appearance. 

That might just be because Heisenburgle has no interest in getting pretty, Lucas reminded himself, but the explanation didn’t quite fit since the gnome was definitely a hardcore completionist when it came to alchemy, but at least at first, Lucas bought it. It was only when he discovered how few powerful Intelligence and Soul modifying reagents there were and how none of them seemed to play well together that his curiosity was piqued. 

Heisenburgle had less to say on the subject than he would have thought. “Of course, it’s easier to strengthen the body than the mind!” he declared as if it should be obvious. “Elixirs that empower the intellect cost many times what those that affect muscles do. It’s the same reason that healing potions cost less than mana potions!”

“No, that’s the cartel pricing of the alchemist guild,” Lucas muttered too softly for the alchemist to hear. Lucas did find the dichotomy interesting, but for the moment, it was just a curiosity, as he was focused on the subject of getting tougher. 

Endurance was one of the most common attributes found in reagents in his experience. Nearly anything that was earth-aligned had at least a little. What was more interesting to him was what kind of endurance he wanted.  When his system hadn’t been plugged in quite right, before the Gods had rearranged it for him, he’d only seen numbers. Now, he saw little descriptors next to the numbers. 

The implication, of course, was that not all numbers were created equal, but it was only when Lucas started to sift through all the ingredients that he noticed that the reagents that were most compatible had a couple of things in common. The first was that their elemental alignments usually matched up, which was a point for Heisenburgle. That wasn’t always the case, but it was enough to make it a rule of thumb. More interesting, though, were those qualifiers. 

Reagents where endurance was listed as (tough) were more likely to be compatible with other (tough) ingredients than with those that were (solid), (tireless), or (steady). That interested him, but it required a whole extra level of tests. He’d planned to create a powerful endurance potion and then get right back to his original plans, but suddenly, he wasn’t sure which kind of endurance potion he should make and how much of a difference there really was between them. 

Heisenburgle seemed amused by those experiments, but the more Lucas tried to explain them to the gnome, the more amused he became. At first, he just enjoyed telling Lucas how expensive some of the powders and dusts he was using were. “That one you’d never be able to afford outside these walls,” the gnome declared as Lucas eyed the Essence of Powdered Mummy. “It comes from the desert kingdoms far to the north and costs three dragons a vial!”

Essence of Mummy (powdered): +9 Endurance (undying), +2 strength (implacable), -3 soul (drained), -20% mana (enervated) Weakly Earth Aligned. Imbibers of any potion containing this ingredient have a small but increasing chance of being afflicted with tomb rot. The disease is slow, painful, and inevitably fatal. 

While Lucas was intrigued by any ingredient with an endurance of 9 and an attribute like (undying), it was the side effect and not the cost that made it undesirable. Maybe I can add that to whatever poison I whip up for Skylara, he thought, smirking at the joke that he chose not to share with Heisenburgle. 

When Lucas tried to explain to him that there were different kinds of toughness, though, the gnome looked at him like he had three eyes. “Take these two,” Lucas said, “Both of them increase your endurance by the same amount, but this one makes you tougher, and this one makes you tireless.”

They both looked the same shade of muddy brown. Without Lucas’ pop-ups, he doubted he would have been able to tell the difference. 

The gnome scrutinized them for almost a minute before he said, “Every potion has its own nuances. In a sense, none of them are the same, and only broadly classifiable into large categories—”

“No, like, these have exactly the same potency but only one small difference,” Lucas tried to explain. “I could make others, too. They’re the same, but they’re not, you know?”

“So, what’s the difference?” the gnome asked. 

“That’s what I’m trying to find out,” Lucas answered as he watched the gnome’s face light up with unspoken derision. “Listen, this is how science works, okay? You make experiments and compare your results, then you use those results to make better experiments.”

“Ah yes, your strange religion of science,” the gnome chortled. 

“This is literally the same thing as when you made two separate potions of flight to demonstrate elemental affinities!” Lucas countered. “How is that okay, and this isn’t?”

“The potions I created were done with the proscribed ingredients in the proper manner!” Heisenburlge insisted. “You are just mixing random ingredients together, regardless of the consequences and side effects!”

Lucas chaffed at the man’s dogmatic worldview, but he brushed it off. Today wasn’t about Heisenburgle’s misgivings. It was about learning the difference between (tough) and (tireless), which turned out not to be much, at least at the +5 level. 

He tried them both outside, one after the other, with only a short rest in between. His very subjective and not really scientific tests consisted of a jog around the walls of the compound and a duel with a couple of the guards who agreed to humor him. Including rest breaks for an accurate comparison, the whole thing took less than an hour, but by the end, endurance potions or not, Lucas was exhausted. 

The first thing he did was fight. That was his control. He did that again after two long laps around the courtyard of Blackgate when he was sucking wind and did notably worse. His potion of toughness fixed that, though, almost immediately, and he did almost as well in the ensuing fight and much better in his next round of jogging than he had the first time. 

The tireless potion offered even better results, but in retrospect, Lucas had probably chosen tests that were more in line with its particular strengths. “Does that mean I gotta let someone beat the shit out of me to really see the difference?” he wondered aloud. 

He had no plans to do that, of course, but it did clarify things. Even after he let both potions fade and gave it a few hours, he didn’t feel totally exhausted by his exertions, which was another good sign. 

“Well, did you ever figure out the difference?” Heisenburgle teased him that morning over a breakfast of toast and sausage. 

“I figured out which one I’m making, and for now, that’s enough,” Lucas nodded. 

“Just as long as you make more of your Blue soon,” the gnome smirked. “I’ve received word from the Prince that your favorite customer is asking for more.” 

Lucas gripped his fork more tightly, wondering what he might add to the potion to make it lethal while still keeping it the same color as the gnome added, “I’m told she has her drugs tested now, though. She seems to think you might bear a grudge against her.”

That quip was enough to make him look sharply at the gnome, but Lucas didn’t say any of the murderous thoughts he was thinking. Instead, he tried to refocus on his efforts to kill her. If she won’t drink poison, I’ll coat my blade with it, he promised himself. Or maybe I’ll invent the world’s first syringe and inject her with it. 

The mere fact that he had to give that bitch what she wanted after everything had happened galled him and made it very hard for Lucas to sleep that afternoon. Even with how tired he was and the black-out curtains blocking out the light, he tossed and turned pretty much all day. 

He kept trying to change the subject. He tried to figure out how many points it would cost to max out an attribute with just points instead of potions before eventually deciding it was unworkable. He also tried to think about which reagents he was going to use as his baseline to try to make a potion of +24 endurance. 

Neither was very good at taking his mind off his anger since all roads lead back to what he planned to do with his potions. Upgraded abilities and upgraded potions were both just means to an end. “Honestly, I’d be happy just making healing potions for sick kids and booze for fun if I could, but that’s not really an option, is it?” he asked himself. 

It was his own fault. He should have known better. No good came from making or dealing drugs; that was as true here as it was back on Earth. The problem now wasn’t just that Skylara was a murderess. It was that she was a junkie.

Even if she hadn't burned down Parin Manor, even if she'd been perfectly well-behaved for the rest of his life, then shortly after his death, she was still going to be looking for her next fix a few days after he was gone with all the violence she could muster. If Lucas keeled over tomorrow from a heart attack because he was testing his new potions too hard, she’d probably burn down the whole countryside inside of a year because she couldn’t get her Lwynthall. While that wouldn’t be his fault, he'd certainly be to blame. 

That was the image that he finally fell asleep to after he’d finished dwelling on all this. He’d have to kill the dragon not because she’d wrong him but because one day she’d burn down the world for one more high. It was almost karmic. 

Ch. 147 - The Moment of Truth

Lucas spent the rest of the week making a variety of potions. Other than practicing his swordsmanship every day and dealing with Heisenburgle’s ego, that was pretty much all he did, but it was worth it. Day by day, and ingredient by ingredient, Lucas could feel his plan coming together. He’d be ready for the real test soon. 

Some days, the gnome looked as eager as Lucas did. Mostly, that was because he wanted to mock his unorthodox creations, but sometimes, it was because Lucas hinted about the insights his talents gave him. He didn’t reveal the numbers or anything, but the mere idea that Lucas was pushing the envelope in ways that Heisenburgle would never be able to make the gnome fixate on his experiments for reasons that were related as much to envy as to genuine interest. 

First came the endurance potions; he made several of those. The first was a +9 Potion of Durability with no real side effects. That was his baseline test. He also made a +24 Elixir of the Earth-Hardened Body for his full test. 

That one had a bit too much poison and negative qualities associated with it, but he’d already poured half his mana into making the gray, effervescent liquid. When the time came for a final version, he would clear those defects up, too. For now, he budgeted his limited resources since he had so much to do. 

Potion of Durability (1 dose): +9 Endurance (tough), +1 poison (acid), +1 strength (ready). Duration: 5 minutes. 

Elixir of the Earth Hardened Body (1 dose): + 24 Endurance (enduring), -2 intelligence (slow), -1 agility (delayed). Duration: 5 minutes. +25% more damage from air-aligned attacks. 

His goal was a simple one. He planned to do two tests. In the first, he’d use three potions to bring his endurance, strength, and agility up to twenty across the board and gauge his abilities at that level. Then, the following day, if that went well, he would do it again at thirty-five. 

Well, as close to thirty-five as I can get. He told himself as he looked over the fruits of his labor. Getting strength and endurance to that level hadn’t been a problem, but getting agility that high would be impossible, even after empowering the potions without some ugly tradeoffs he didn’t want to make. So, for now, he would have to settle for his Elixer of Divine Grace, which was a syrupy, sky-blue concoction that would get him to thirty-one. 

Elixir of Divine Grace (1 dose): +21 Agility (flowing), +6 poison (inflaming), -2 intelligence (impatient). Duration: 5 minutes. Imbibing this potion causes sleeplessness for twelve to twenty-four hours. 

Worst case, I can just up my agility by four if I need to close that gap, he told himself as he looked at the thing and went over the plan again in his mind. It would be eight points, which is almost as expensive as learning magic, but I could do it. 

The fact was he didn’t even really know if thirty-five was the limit or if it was even survivable. He was just going off what the achievement told him. Still, he was determined to try, and his first test went as smoothly as he could have hoped for. Not only did Lucas suffer no ill effects in the hours following his attempt to boost his physical attributes to twenty, but he blew away all his tests.

Lucas had already expected that he’d be able to lift four hundred pounds, and he’d done it in front of a crowd of workers and guards who had apparently been waiting for another show. What he hadn’t expected was how fast he’d be. If he was as strong as an Olympic weightlifter, now he was as fast as a soccer player or a gymnast with a similar level of training. 

No sooner had he put the scrap-filled cauldron down than he was picking up a sword and challenging guards to a dual. There was some joking about how many he should fight at once, but he was less concerned about fairness than about fighting as the clock ticked down on his boost potions. So, after only a moment, he just said, “Screw it, I’ll take you all on once,” to the half dozen guards that were bickering about who was going first. 

That made them laugh, but not for long. The results were decisive. No, they were more than that. They were excessive. By the end, he was holding back a little just because he didn’t want to accidentally hurt anyone too badly. 

Unenhanced, Lucas had faith that he could beat any one of them and maybe any two of them with a little luck. However, today, bursting at the seams as he was the power of alchemy, none of them stood a chance. If someone was trying to hide behind a shield, he’d hammer it to knock them to the ground. If they were on the offensive, he’d step around the blade and attack the hilt to disarm them. 

He’d been worried that the fight would last too long and that he’d run out of gas before it was done. That might have been true if he’d only enhanced his strength, but even with only two minutes on the clock at the start of the melee, all of his opponents were on the ground, unarmed, or both, before the effects started to expire. 

That blew Lucas away, and as he helped the fallen guards to their feet, he saw as much fear in their eyes as he did admiration. “You can move like that? From a potion?” one of the guards asked him. 

“Well, I sure as hell can’t do it the rest of the time, now can I?” Lucas asked with a laugh. He was trying to make a joke to lighten the mood, but few joined him in it, and when he turned around, he saw Heisenburgle watching the whole thing from the nearest balcony. 

While Lucas wasn’t bothered by that, he was surprised by it since the gnome was usually in bed by this time of day. Someone must have told him what I was up to, Lucas mused as he made his way back to his room. He expected the gnome to have a talk with him, but he never appeared. 

“He probably thinks that shit is ominous,” Lucas said as he kicked off his boots and lay down on his bed with hands behind his bed to look up at the ceiling. “But really, he’d just find some way to rain on my parade.”

It wouldn’t have worked, though. As Lucas played some of the more vivid moments of what he’d just done back in his mind, he grew more and more excited. If this was half power, he had no idea what he’d be able to do with his stats in the thirties. Assuming your body doesn’t come apart at the seams, he reminded himself. 

There was that. He kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, though, and it didn’t seem to be happening. He’d moved like the wind and lifted truly punishing amounts of weight, and he was barely sore. There wasn’t even any indication of addiction or potion sickness on his status sheet. As far as Lucas was concerned, he was golden, and he fell asleep that day with a smile on his face, eager to try taking things to the next level the following day. 

Heisenburgle, to absolutely no one’s surprise, was far from sanguine about what Lucas had done. After lecturing him on the dangers of mixing different potions and quizzing him about the ingredients he’d used for “His little spectacle,” he only belatedly got around to asking what it was Lucas was up to. 

“Well, you mentioned you made your little super soldier elixir for the Prince,” Lucas offered. “I just thought that—”

“That was one potion with three effects,” the gnome chided him, “Not three potions with one effect each!”

Lucas tried to explain to him that it was fine, but eventually, he had to invoke his talent for the gnome to back off on the point. “It doesn’t matter anyway. It worked insanely well. I plan on trying an even stronger formulation tomorrow.”

“A s-stronger formulation?!” the gnome wailed. “Lucas! You’ll burn out your liver! You’ll upset your humors. These are not things to be trifled with!”

“And yet they are perfectly safe,” Lucas insisted. 

“I could have your lab privileges revoked!” the gnome declared. “I could have you locked in your rooms for the duration of your stay!”

“But then you wouldn’t get to see if it works,” Lucas answered with a cocky grin. “Don’t you want to push the bounds of alchemy?”

Heisenburgle hesitated. Even if I did, I don’t think you should perform that test here,” Heisenburgle said, saying what Lucas was thinking. “Really, I don’t think you should test it at all, but I doubt you’ll accept that answer, and I’m disinclined to bar your experimentation, at least for now.” 

“You, of all people, trying to place limits on Alchemy,” Lucas joked. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing!”

“I said no such thing!” the gnome grumbled as he wandered toward a map on the far side of the room. “If you aim to test your potions, however misguided that might be, I will only watch from afar. You simply should not do that testing where others can see. They will talk, and eventually, the Prince will hear of it.”

“So, what do you suggest?” Lucas asked. 

“We have several alternatives,” Heisenburgle said, waving broadly at the map. “To the northwest, not far from the road we take to the city, there is an area frequented by bandits who—”

“Can we do this without killing people?” Lucas asked. 

“That’s where you draw the line, is it?” the gnome asked. “Very well, to the east, in the deep woods, there is a tribe of elves. They are unlikely to fight unless provoked, but if you were to burn down—”

“Dammit, man, elves are people too. They aren’t goblins!” Lucas protested. 

Heisenburgle glared at him before continuing, “People? Perhaps, but some might disagree. Regardless, I do not think that goblins are an appropriate test for the strength you displayed yesterday, let alone the strength you hope to display tomorrow.”

“I agree, but surely there’s something else I can fight, right?” Lucas looked over the map of the region, but besides a few notes about where certain mushrooms might be acquired and the seasons they were the most frequent, there were no labels on it to offer any insight. 

“Well, there is a swamp ogre here and a nest of owlbears somewhere in this area,” Heisenburgle said, pointing out each one, “But I do not expect that either of them would work for our purposes.”

“Why’s that?” Lucas asked, suppressing a sigh of relief that he wouldn’t have to fight the monster that had almost ended him last time. 

“Because I’m not traipsing through the woods or the swamps with you for half a day,” Heisenburgle answered with a shake of his head. “It would be, in a word, exhausting. No, I think we’ll go for the ice troll here, near the base of Mount Garthem. Now that it’s warming up, the beast might well be hibernating, but a few pyrotechnics can solve that problem.”

“Ice troll?” Lucas asked. “Don’t they regenerate? I’m not sure that’s the best test to—”

“We can make an acid blood poison for your blade to prevent that,” the gnome nodded. “Otherwise, I think it will be a worthwhile test. It's been there for so long because I’d lose a dozen men to attack it, but if you really believe your potions are as potent as you say they are… well, then it should be quite suitable.”

It only dawned on Lucas at that moment that the gnome was expecting him to back down. Heisenburgle had picked the most dangerous encounter he could think of. It was something that Lucas probably should have been more afraid of, but there, his ignorance saved him. 

He was supposed to give Heisenburgle an excuse about why they should pick a different target right now. Lucas was sure of that, but he was way too psyched up at the idea. Instead, he said, “Let’s do it. We can make the acid blood whatever and then go tonight!”

“Well…” Heisenburgle answered, suddenly backpedaling, “Maybe we shouldn’t after all. What would the Prince say if you were to die on my in such a foolish way?”

“Fine,” Lucas sighed. “I’ll make your fucking backup plan.”