SpanishRed

Toxic Masculinity

Toxic Masculinity

Brat Emergency Hotline

Inspired by TODDLER FEELINGS HELPLINE by SARA GIVEN

Hello. You’ve reached the Brat Emergency Helpline. Please Choose from the following options:

* If you unpacked all the jute and hung it in the tallest tree in the garden, please hide for at least 48 hours.

* If you f...

Domly Dom Feelings Helpline

Variation of Toddler Feelings Helpline

Hello, you have reached the Domly Dom Feelings Helpline. Please choose from the following options:

• If your sub went to �...
  2024-02-03 04:36:58 +0000 UTC View Post

So You Want an Editor For Your First Book...

A reader recently asked me to recommend an editor for a NaNoWriMo book. I receive a lot of requests like that, and I only had to try to fulfil their requests once. The editors I know will not take on a project like that, but before we get into that, let’s look at what a developmental edit actua...

Greta Thunberg's Haters

Rape recovery is not a direction you need to go in. It's a country you need to explore blindfolded, guided by the voice of someone who knows the land.

Back when I was young and struggling with rape-related PTSD, people used to throw $1 advice at me all day and once more for dessert: “Stop thinking about your rape. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Trauma begets trauma. PTSD is a sign that you're obsessing about this assault. Try dance classes....

Not All Men

Not All Rapists Know They're Rapists (Obvious trigger warning is obvious)

“We’re not all trying to be creepy.” - A reader

When you see the aftermath of a lion kill, something in the ether isn’t quite right. You see the blood on the grass and gore in the dirt, but the moment feels as serene as any other. Putting necessity and Mother Natur...

Nice Guys

He's Just Our Cute Neighbourhood Rapist

My uncle lives in a reserve called Marloth Park, where there are giraffes under your washing line and monkeys on your roof. Herbivores are welcome, but dangerous carnivores are moved to the Kruger Park lest they murder the residents.

Some years back, a crocodile found its way into a Marloth...

Shallows

It takes a lot to make me resent the sight of a penis, but your cock shot avatar is a lot.

If I had the time, I would happily make a religion out of penises. I love them hard. I love them soft. I love them cut. I love them even more *un*cut. I have opinions about upward curves and philosophies about lack of curves. Mostly, I just want to put all of them in my mouth. If I was sluttier, ...

Fetlife Etiquette for Noobs

• It’s impolite to insert yourself into strangers’ sexual experiences without permission, so keep your imaginary hands and first-person pronouns out of your picture comments. “That’s gorgeous” is A-okay. “I want to put my [redacted] in your [redacted]” is not okay. “Good photo...
  2024-01-23 04:29:00 +0000 UTC View Post

This Doesn't Kill Me...

Explicit Photo Clickathons Are a Boundary Issue

I just had a fun conversation with a man we’ll call Steve. He didn’t kick up any dust. He was a perfectly likable guy, so naturally I clicked into his profile to find out where this cute li’l stranger had come from. All I saw there was me. Me in his activity feed. Me as his sole follow, and...

My mother always said I gave too much

Indifferent men

Important Scientific Announcement on Brat Training

I just watched Canine Intervention and learned that dogs are more trainable when they have a dopamine hit. As a totally real, not-even-a-little-bit-fake scientist, I’m deeply committed to spreading scientific knowledge throughout the world. Science has determined, through my TV viewing, that pr...

My Draw to Rape Play is Sexual (Trigger warning)

Some rape survivors have a masochistic draw to rape play. They want the pain. 

I don't.

Some rape survivors use it to release tears that have refused to fall.

I’ve done all the crying my rape required of me already. 

...

Letters to People Who Write

Every now and then, people send me their writing for feedback. Today's request came from a new writer who's hoping to perfect the ancient art of smut. I hate smut beyond all reason, but I can fake it. I really can pretend I respect the genre. Just watch. 

Dear Smut Writer

Why I Need Vanilla Sex

I like vanilla sex. You heard it here first. Just don’t tell all the Super Masochists lest they hang me in the village square. In Vanilla Land, you spice up your sex life with a pair of furry handcuffs, but for me, vanilla sex is a perfectly legitimate seasoning. Sadomasochism compels me, but s...

No More Tighty Whities, Please

I’ve spent more hours shopping for bras than I have in nightclubs. The first stop of every early relationship is Woolworths, but I’ve only dated two men who really understood the power of well-selected underwear. Tighty whities are not my idea of well-selected underwear. Have you never seen a...

Things I Learned About Abuse From an Online Gaming Company

In late 2021, an online casino company called Playtika bought a successful design game named Redecor. The new business didn’t care much about its players. It cared about profits, so it immediately began adapting the game to trigger maximum addiction and maximum buys. It captured my curiosity, s...

Reasons Lee Holloway is Better Than That 50 Shades Girl

• Lee came to the words, “Just one scoop of creamed potatoes, one slice of butter, and four peas.” That should honestly be enough to settle it, so I don’t know why you’re sitting there waiting for more.
• Lee let her boyfriend put a saddle on her back and a carrot in her mouth ...
  2024-01-17 09:42:16 +0000 UTC View Post

Poetry Unbidden

This is a gorgeous poem by Nick Vittum--one of the best I've ever read about writing. (Posted with permission.) 

I used to think the most romantic possible
was to sit up through the dead of night
a typewriter pounding
drink and ashtray at the side.

I didn't smoke and I...

So You Think White Cis Men Don't Have Privilege Because You Suffer, Too...

South Africa experiences two hours of blackouts on most days, but when our power crisis becomes catastrophic, you can push that up to 14 hours a day. We call this loadshedding. If you’ve never been through it, you probably think of it as candles-and-Scrabble time. You’ve experienced power out...

Economy

Writing economy is an important discipline for any writer. It means choosing your words as carefully as you might take products off the shelf during a broke month. When you're shopping with a few bucks in your pocket, you're thinking about how far each product can go and whether ...

Types of Predatory People in the Kink Scene

Consent activist who knows 67 strategies for violating consent without getting accused of anything.

Thinks that failing to communicate her STI status before unprotected sex doesn’t make her a consent violator.

Kinky but doesn’t do any of that event crap. Wants to choke you any way...

Step-by-Step Guide to Online Dating

Post a photograph of your mouth with something artsy like a paintbrush between your teeth.

Decide that’s not ambitious enough and replace the paintbrush with a Coke Can.

Maybe crushing the can will make it fit.

Maybe you should just use Photoshop.

Reply to all 623 messag...