Zany About You - Ch. 4 (Be The Father Of This Child! Side Story, Patreon Exclusive)

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Chapter Four – Sex Therapist At The Rescue

Zane smiled as he checked the caller ID. It looked like Dan was a man of his word and no longer dodging him. Right now, he was the one to call, and Zane felt unexplainably happy. It was one thing that he wanted to get into Dan’s pants and that he saw the guy giving in slowly as a good sign, but, somehow, it was more than that.

“Hi, man,” he answered right away.

“Hi, Zane,” Dan said, and Zane could sense his shyness even through the phone. It was so delicious to have a big guy like Dan give in slowly. All that shy act was a bonus. “I was wondering if we could, um, hang out? At my place?”

Zane had his own place, and it would have been easier for them to hang out there, but if Dan wanted to invite him over, he couldn’t say ‘no’. “Your folks aren’t home, I guess.”

“Yeah. They travel a lot. For business. They work together. And they, um, trust me.” 

Zane chuckled. “I bet you’re the type not to throw parties when your mom and dad are out of town, right?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Dan replied with a small chuckle of his own.

“So,” Zane’s voice dropped to a whisper, “are you in the mood to be a little naughty?”

A nervous laugh was the answer now. “I could also use someone to talk to.”

Talk to? Zane found the idea at least a bit funny. His usual hookups and even short relationships had never been crazy about talking to him. He clearly had other good points that they liked about him. Conversation wasn’t exactly his forte. But, to each their own, and if Dan wanted to talk, that was what they would do.

“All right, so when do you want me to come over?”

“My folks are away for a couple of days, so whenever it suits you … today?” Dan finished his sentence with a question mark and one that sounded pretty hopeful.

“I’m on my way,” Zane said right away. He stopped for a second. Didn’t he sound too eager?

“All right. I’ll be waiting, then.”

Dan sounded just as eager as him. It was funny what was happening with both of them. Some of Dan’s nervousness was clearly rubbing off on Zane, too, and that meant that something new was going on. Zane couldn’t tell what it was. The usual chase and conquest were always a thrill for him, but he was sure there was more to it. He scratched his head absentmindedly. Yeah, it was something new, and it felt damned exciting.

***

Dan welcomed him in the door. He wore a washed-out pair of jeans and a simple white tee, but Zane thought he looked amazing. His short hair was a bit wet, which meant that Dan must have just gotten out of the shower. Zane stepped in and allowed Dan to close the door behind them before attacking him. Dan didn’t protest as he was slammed against the wall, his mouth soon covered by hungry lips.

Zane noticed the obedient behavior right away, but he could still smell nervousness on Dan. “Hey, hey,” he cooed, “are you all right?”

Big guys like them didn’t need to be asked if they were all right. They had to be by default. But it looked like Dan was a bundle of emotions, and Zane wanted to start unraveling it. He had a strong feeling that the reward for all his hard work would be awesome.

“I,” Dan started, but then stopped and licked his lips nervously.

“You … what?”

“I tried to watch some porn, but I felt like I was doing something wrong, so I stopped jerking off, and then I thought it was bad, and my balls hurt.” That was said in one quick go. 

Zane quirked his eyebrows and stifled the laughter bubbling in his chest. “Well, my friend, you just got a case of blue balls, is all.”

Dan looked away, embarrassed. “I’ve hurt others talking about it, but it didn’t happen to me. I mean, until, you know, recently. April and all,” he added, after a short pause.

“Right,” Zane said and pursed his lips. “Lucky you, I have just the remedy for it.”

“You do? It kind of still hurts,” Dan said anxiously. 

“You could have said that it was an emergency over the phone,” Zane pointed out.

“You came quickly. I appreciate it,” Dan said, without one ounce of hesitation.

“Let’s take this to your room,” Zane suggested and grabbed Dan’s hand.

It looked like Zane was the host, and Dan, the guest. But Dan clearly didn’t mind it being guided around his own house. Zane had only been once, but he knew the way.

Once they were upstairs, in Dan’s bedroom, Zane closed the door and then took a long look at Dan. “Strip,” he said directly.

Dan blushed. “I don’t want to get fucked. I don’t think I’m ready.”

Zane waved. “I’m going to blow you. You clearly need it.”

Dan’s eyes grew as big as saucers. “What? Like right now?”

Zane nodded. “Don’t tell me you don’t like getting a blowjob.”

Dan looked down. “One girl tried to do it to me once, but I got really nervous, and I just ended up – never mind.”

“Wow. So no one ever gave you head?” Zane questioned. “Did you sleep with girls? It’s just a curiosity.”

“Yeah. But I didn’t get much of it. I didn’t really like it that much.”

Zane nodded thoughtfully. “And after that fail, no other girlfriend tried to blow you? What? Did your tool scare them all away or something?”

Dan shook his head again. It was evident he found that not as funny as Zane did. “I couldn’t let them. I was afraid that I might not be able to hold it, and I didn’t want to think of, um, other stuff either when they went down on me.”

“You’re so fucking adorable,” Zane said. He could feel a large grin splitting his face. “Come on. Take off all your clothes. I promise you it will feel like frigging heaven, although I feel like I should tell you this. Don’t you dare dream of April while your cock is in my mouth.”

Dan nodded solemnly. The guy was so serious Zane had no idea what to make of it. But that meant that his promise was solid gold, and Zane did want to test some boundaries with Dan. After all, they couldn’t remain stuck to some jerk off routine for long. Zane’s appetite didn’t allow one-course meals.

Without any other encouragement, Dan pulled his white tee over his head, revealing a sculpted chest that made Zane’s mouth water instantly. He wasn’t shy now about pushing down his jeans and underwear, either, although he did some clumsy pirouettes as he took off his socks. Then, he stood straight, his hands carefully placed in front, and his eyes looking ahead as if he was in the military or something.

“At ease, soldier,” Zane said and began laughing right away.

Dan frowned, but Zane didn’t allow him to think too much. He walked over to him and kissed him. Under the careful ministrations of Zane’s tongue in his mouth, Dan seemed to melt. 

“Let’s just see what the problem is,” Zane said with a lopsided smile.

Dan looked at him and bit his lips.

“What?” Zane asked.

“It’s just how you smile,” Dan said sheepishly. He put up one hand and caressed Zane’s lips in a timid, yet bold, gesture. “It’s so sexy it makes me my knees go all jelly.”

Zane couldn’t believe his ears. Was Dan secretly the biggest seducer he had ever had a chance to meet, or was he just naturally sweet and had no idea of the effect his words had on others? Zane could only congratulate himself for getting to him before anyone else.

“Then, you should check out my bj technique,” Zane said, trying hard to rein in the butterflies in his stomach that were suddenly hard at work once Dan had said those words. Since when did he have tummy butterflies? That was so uncool. “Maybe it would be better if you sat on the bed. I don’t want you to end up on the floor once I start working on you.”

“Okay,” Dan agreed and bit his bottom lip again.

Zane leaned in and stole another kiss. “Come, let’s get you comfortable.”

Dan laid on his back, and Zane took in how his chest rose and fell. He was still nervous, but Zane planned on making all his worries go away. Blowjobs could have this wonderful side effect. 

He knelt between Dan’s knees, and first, he gave the heavy balls a long lick. Dan gasped right away. Zane could see how hard Dan was, and it made him happy; maybe it was because Dan hadn’t come after beating his meat to who knows how many porn movies, but maybe it was because of him that Dan was so hard, after all.

“Don’t mind a thing. If you feel like coming, do it.”

“I’ll tell you,” Dan whispered. “So that you don’t choke on it or something.”

“Do I look like some novice to you?” Zane asked and laughed. “I’m telling you. Don’t worry about a thing.”

Damn, that hard cock that was now so nicely presented in front of his eyes in all its glory had been on his mind for days now. Zane could consider himself lucky to be in that position. While he might not have allowed too many guys to fuck him, he had no hang-ups when it came to blowjobs. The odds were out on whether he liked better to receive or give them. He enjoyed them both ways to the extreme.

Dan’s cock was so smooth in his hand when Zane started to pump it slowly. He watched as Dan grabbed the coverlet with both his hands and listened to his labored breathing. It was nice to give him something to hold on to, Zane thought, as he simply took the engorged head into his mouth.

A small cry of pleasure from Dan confirmed what he already thought. Dan was nervous about getting a blowjob because he might have feared that he would have liked it too much when performed on him by another guy. Zane would explore all those possibilities later on. Right now, the hard cock in his mouth and the heavy ball sack he was playing with were the only emergencies.

He spared nothing. He licked the head, the underside, the entire length as he deepthroated. Dan sounded like a tortured soul, but one in the throes of ecstasy, so Zane could feel himself getting dizzy from the feeling of power he was experiencing right now. 

“Zane, please, I’m, I’m,” Dan shouted from the top of his lungs, “coming!”

Zane had to use both hands to grab Dan’s hips and keep them from lifting off the bed. The viscous liquid he enjoyed so much filled his mouth, and he gulped it down, in no position to savor it at the moment. That would come later, and he knew that he would love to have Dan return the favor. But that was something they could look forward to; right now, all that mattered was that he was capable of making Dan feel like that. 

He took his time to clean the cock that was slowly losing some of its hardness and getting into a relaxed state. Zane massaged Dan’s ball sack a little, but he knew that the heaviness and, with it, the pain had also gone. That was one case of blue balls he had gotten solved swiftly and with flying colors. Maybe he was no sex therapist, but he knew how to deal with situations like that with no issues.

“So,” he asked as he got to his feet, “how was it?”

Dan looked at him with moist eyes. His lips were wet, too, so Zane took all those as good signs. He leaned over Dan and smirked at him. “Now, does it still hurt?”

“No, it’s amazing,” Dan mumbled. He pushed himself on his elbows with some difficulty, and his eyes traveled down on Zane’s body. “You’re hard, too.”

“It’s not about me since you were the guy with the emergency.”

Dan said nothing, but he straightened up even more, and his hands went directly at Zane’s crotch. For long moments, Zane didn’t even dare to breathe. He watched in silence as Dan opened his belt and fly and then took out his cock.

“You’re so big,” Dan whispered and began to pump Zane’s cock with fascination written all over his face.

Zane didn’t dare to hope, but he moaned as soon as Dan’s lips connected with the head of his cock. Dan didn’t go further, settling for small kisses around the head as he continued to jerk him off. It didn’t matter; there was enough time to show Dan all the ropes, and those included him becoming an expert at giving blowjobs. All in due time, Zane thought to himself.

For now, the hand wrapped around his cock and going faster and faster felt pretty nice. “Hey, man,” he whispered, “you might want to move your head out of the way, or I might just shoot all over.”

“What?” Dan asked, and he seemed to have processed little of what Zane was saying, as immersed as he was in what he was doing.

“Damn it,” Zane said through his teeth, “I’m coming!”

Dan didn’t move his head away in time. Zane watched helplessly as his cum erupted at full speed from his cock, spraying Dan’s cute face all over. As Dan had his mouth half-opened, Zane was pretty sure that some of it might have landed in there, too.

That was the road of no return. Dan made a distressed sound and did move away his head, but it was too late. Zane had given him an accidental facial, and he couldn’t say he felt bad about it. That kind of risk came with the territory. 

“Oh, damn,” Dan sputtered, and his hands went to his face.

Zane was breathing hard and couldn’t talk. “Tissues?” he asked with difficulty. 

Dan just pointed at the small desk, and Zane found them. Without any preamble, he caught Dan’s chin and directed his face to him. Quickly, he dabbed the droplets of cum from Dan’s forehead, cheeks, mouth, and chin. Dan was hesitantly licking his lips, and there was a conflicted expression on his face.

“I’m really sorry about that, but I did warn you,” Zane pointed out.

“Yeah, kind of late, though,” Dan mumbled.

“Are you mad?” Zane kept Dan’s chin between his fingers and looked down at him. 

Dan opened his eyes. “I got some in my mouth.” There was a bit of shock written all over his face. 

“And? How was it?” Zane asked.

“Not bad,” Dan whispered, and then he suddenly grabbed Zane’s spent cock and began licking the little cum left in the tiny eye.

Zane grunted. “Fuck. You know I can’t get hard again so fast.”

Dan looked up at him. “It’s not bad,” he admitted again, but this time, the realization of what he must have done caught up with him, because he blushed.

Zane sighed. “Now that you no longer have blue balls let’s see why you couldn’t come while watching porn.”

He couldn’t believe he played the sex therapist, but there he was.

***

Dan had brought a couple of beers, and they were now drinking slowly, without any of them talking.

“Everyone watches porn,” Zane pointed out.

“I know,” the reply came. Dan got red to the tips of his ears. “But when I looked at those guys going at it on the screen, my heart just started to beat so fast. I was afraid it would burst or something.”

Zane chuckled, but then he remembered that he was supposed to play the therapist. “You just got nervous. But why would you feel that? I mean, it looks like you’re pretty cool with jerking me off, and even, you know, tasting my cum.”

Dan looked down. “I just don’t know. Is this what I want? I mean, I know that I want it, and my mind goes all blank when I see two guys going at it. It’s like taking over or something like that.”

Zane sighed and scratched his head. “It’s all right, Dan. A lot of guys do it. It’s cool. No one is going to burn you at the stake, or some shit like that.”

Dan seemed to study a stubborn stain on the carpet. “I don’t know.”

“Your parents,” Zane said abruptly.

Dan’s head shot up, and Zane knew that he had struck a nerve. 

“What would they think if they knew?”

Dan frowned. “No, they won’t know,” he said stubbornly.

“All right, cool,” Zane replied. Maybe he wasn’t that good at this sex therapy, after all.

“I thought I would be with some girl, marry at twenty-five, and all that,” Dan began talking. “But it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen.”

“No. As long as you’re true to what you want, I guess not.”

Dan let out a small humorous laugh. “But it would be easy, right? To be like everyone else?”

“Not everyone else, obviously,” Zane pointed out. 

“Yeah. There’s you, and April, and his boyfriend,” Dan said slowly.

“And a bunch of other people you don’t know. There might be even some of your mates who could be into this,” Zane said.

Dan shook his head. “I don’t think so.”

“Look,” Zane moved and put a hand on Dan’s shoulder, “you don’t have to figure everything out in one day. Just live in the moment for a while, see how it goes for you.”

Dan didn’t seem less distressed. “My mind is so full of fuck,” he moaned and covered his eyes. “I know I like April.”

Right. Zane was glad Dan had his eyes covered, or he would have seen a lot of disappointment on his face.

“But you’re making my mind blow up,” Dan added, after a short moment of silence.

Oh. Now that was … Zane couldn’t find the correct term for it. “Cool,” he said and felt pretty dumb the next second.

“I don’t think it’s cool,” Dan replied. “I think it’s pretty messed up.”

And there he was, the type of guy Zane usually steered clear of if he could help it. The confused type. But he had known from the start that this wouldn’t be easy, right?

***

They laid in bed after another long session of making out and jerking each other off, and Dan had an ecstatic expression on his face. Zane stared at him. Maybe if they could do that enough times, Dan’s mind would clear some. They had been going at it for the entire evening yesterday, the entire night, and now the whole morning. Something had to give.

“Can I hang out with you when you go visit April and Jett?” Dan asked.

Hmm. No, it would obviously take a longer time than predicted. Zane adjusted his position. “Sure, why not?” After seeing April and Jett happy together for a while, it was possible that Dan would let go of any hopes that he could intervene in that relationship.

Zane was a practical man. If that were what it took, he would do it, no questions asked. Also, the more time they spent together, regardless of whether Dan saw himself and Zane as a couple or not, the better. 

A ping on his phone let him know of an incoming message. He stretched and grabbed it from the nightstand.

“It looks like Jett needs us to come over and babysit his kid while he drives April back from school.”

“Shit,” Dan said. 

“Well, you don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to,” Zane replied, feeling a bit annoyed by Dan’s reaction.

“That’s not it. I’ll come. I just realized that I skipped school today.”

“For real? You just realized that?” Zane asked, amused.

“You really make my head go poof,” Dan said and accompanied his words by a gesture that simulated how his head exploded. 

“That’s nice to hear.”

“So not nice,” Dan retorted. “I rarely skip school. And practice.”

“There’s more to life than football and studying,” Zane explained. “So, maybe it’s not so bad that you skipped school one had because you wanted to get freaky with me.”

Dan snorted. “You’re bad, and you’re making me bad, too,” he said.

Zane wasn’t entirely sure that he was joking. He ran one hand over his face. Why did he have to like this confused boy so much?

***

“So, my dudes,” Jett said, once they were inside, “this is the kid. Take good care of him, or I’ll hang you by your balls. Is that clear?”

“Damn crystal. So, buddy,” Zane leaned over Jay’s high chair, “I guess you’re in our care, huh?”

“For like half an hour,” Jett said. “Be cool, or April is going to eat you both alive.”

“I thought you were the one who wanted us to hang by the balls.”

Jett just shrugged. Zane could tell that there was tension between his best friend and his current, sort of, boyfriend. The two were measuring each other, but the good news was that none of them had taken those cautious stares further. 

“Man, go,” Zane said and pushed Jett toward the door. “We can handle your kid for half an hour. And tell April he’s in good hands. I’m sure he’ll worry the moment he sees you without Jay.”

Jett bristled a little at that. “You can’t know that. What? You’re an expert in what my boyfriend thinks now?”

“Let’s not get our panties in a twist. You’re asking us for a favor, you ass.”

Jett’s eyes were still on Dan. Zane didn’t have to turn to know that they were shooting daggers over his head. 

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Jett said. “It’s just that I don’t like him hang around that much,” he added, pointing at Dan.

“He’s my significant other now, so live with it,” Zane said directly. Jett wasn’t mincing words, so he wasn’t the one to do that, either.

Jett was barely out the door when Dan began. “I’m your significant other?”

“Just a play on words,” Zane said and shrugged. “A little white lie. What? Do you want me to tell Jett you’re here only because you want to keep an eye out for April?”

Dan looked away, and he seemed to feel guilty. Good. Zane wasn’t going to take crap from him as much as he liked the dude.

“Now, let’s hang out with our little buddy here,” Zane said and lifted Jay from his highchair to bounce him in his arms. That seemed to have the desired effect on Jay, who started giggling right away.

Dan was staring at him as if he was growing another head. 

“What?” Zane asked, slightly unnerved by that stare.

“How come you can be nice with babies when you’re beating people up for a living?”

“Oh, so glad you asked,” Zane replied. “It must be because none of this stuff defines who I am.” Damn, that was deep, coming from him.

Dan’s eyes grew wide. “Do you want to be a shrink or something?”

“A shrink?” Yeah, right. He had just said whatever had crossed his mind that moment. “I don’t think so. Maybe I could be a sex therapist, though,” he added.

“A sex therapist?”

“Yeah. I solved your problem, didn’t I?” Zane looked down on Dan’s body quite suggestively.

The instant blush was the answer he expected. That only meant that he was still on the right path.

TBC

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