Suddenly A Succubus Ch. 37 - Reflection

Fun fact—when I first outlined this book, I didn't have a clear picture of what exactly was going to happen after Amara and Vee first discovered Brandon. I knew they were going to race back to Earth and fight off reapers while getting students to safety, but it was hard to figure out what might come after that. There was a lot of stuff I knew might happen, but it really depended on how everything felt once people were safely in the cafeteria.

Initially, I was actually worried that I wasn't going to have enough idea to fill chapters 36, 37, and 38. And let me tell you, I could not have been more wrong.

SO much happened in such a short period of time, I ended up needing all these chapters to properly decompress from everything. I needed to show Amara fighting the reaper, I needed to show what Vee was doing during that time, and in this chapter, I needed to show Tessa unpacking the chaos as well.

It's a very interesting change of pace in my opinion; I've never worked with such a dense series of events before. Honestly, I had a few ideas that ultimately got cut for time. Those ideas aren't gone completely, they might still find a home in Book Four, but it was fascinating seeing my assumptions about the pacing of this Book fly off the rails.

We start off with Tessa, which is always a treat. I love writing from her POV, she's got a delightful edge that really sets her apart from the rest of the cast, and it's been cathartic to see her slowly working through some pretty deep-seated issues.

As a writer, I love when a character does something that feels unique to them. A decision that feels so incredibly them that it makes me appreciate the amount of work I've put into characterizing them. Tessa had a couple of those moments this chapter! First was her apology to Naomi—it was terrible and I was giggling the whole time I wrote it.

More importantly, though, is what comes after. The thought that Tessa wants to unwind from her shitty day by mocking Vee just feels so appropriate, even if it's not a very nice thing to do.

Of course, her planned victory lap falls apart when she inadvertently bullies Vee to tears.

I almost wrote this scene from Vee's POV, so we could see her thoughts as everything from the last week finally caught up with her, but in the end I'm happy I stayed in Tessa's head. While yes, it's important to see how Vee is feeling, I think her breaking down here feels appropriate for the readers. After all, we've been following her train of thought quite extensively this whole book.

Tessa, however, hasn't. I really wanted to challenge her idea of who Vee was in this moment. Tessa clearly has a lot of baggage, and I think it's safe to say that many of her opinions about Vee weren't actually about Vee. Anyways, I think this moment does a great job of shocking Tessa out of her previous state of mind, where she only saw Vee as a traitorous extension of the church, and into a healthier state of mind where she remembers that Vee is a person, and that they used to be friends.

The Tessa/Vee dynamic is one I haven't had as much time to explore, as this story has been pretty heavily focused on Amara, but I like to take every chance I can get to remind people that all these friends do genuinely like each other, even if there's some magical bullshit going on.

It was almost important to stay in Tessa's POV because of the next few events. I consider this chapter as the end of the doubt she's been wrestling with regarding Amara's nature. It was important, in my opinion, to see Tessa witness the overwhelming humanity and frailty of her friends, to remind her that despite being an angel and a demon respectively, they're still capable of getting hurt and messing things up. I've been pretty subtle about this, but I always envisioned Tessa as someone who unconsciously puts herself below all these crazy mystical beings around her. Maybe it's because it's easier to punch up? I dunno, maybe this will come up again later :P

And then, at long last, Nick rejoins Tessa and makes a bold suggestion. This was a scene I've been building to all book, and I'm really happy with how it landed. This sex scene serves as the climax (pun intended) to a few different story threads, so nailing it (pun intended again) was really important.

We're seeing Tessa commit to letting Amara feed on her again, but also we're seeing Nick admit that he's attracted to Tessa after they've finally had the chance to genuinely bond. Plus, later, Tessa admits that she wants this to be more than just sex, which is clearly different than what she was looking for earlier in the book.

It's also the first real sex scene we've had since the first chapter of Book Three, so I think I've been teasing everyone for long enough. Plus, Tessa has tried to get this threesome going before, so I knew it was going to be a blast.

I loved that, after a somewhat quiet start, Amara's tail sneaks around Tessa's waist to escalate the whole affair. I love Amara burning away her clothes in frustration, and I love showing both girls playfully push Nick around after he admits that he's never been in a threesome before. Which, neither has Amara, but that fact rings a very different kind of true given that she's been in a gangbang before.

Finally, once everyone has had their fill, it's time to return upstairs. This is where we see Amara nearly forget about her nudity before walking upstairs, and even though it's a quick moment, I consider it pretty telling. I'm not fully done exploring that impulse, but it's a facet of Amara that I'm always intrigued by.

We've only got two chapters left, folks! I hope I've done a suitable job ramping up the tension!

Nyx <3