Nuka World Radio's "Safari Adventure Time" script sample

Nuka World Radio will have a small episodic show called "Safari Adventure Time" and will be hosted by a fella called "Wasteland Willy"  who speaks with an Aussie accent.  He travels around the wasteland and studies the creatures and robots of the Commonwealth.  Here is a sample script I just wrote for an episode of Safari Adventure Time!

Line 6:  Time for another episode of Safari Adventure Time! I'm Wasteland Willy and I am traversing the dangerous lands to bring you the 4-1-1 on the wondrous creatures of the Commonwealth! Today's episode is a little off key if you will. This episode is sponsored by RobCo. I'm just kidding. RobCo. don't pay me shit. Anyways... Today I am tracking an Assultron! The assaultron's body seems to be modeled after that of a female figure. No wonder they call it the Assultron... get it? Ass-ultron? Get it? If ya don't... oh boy they have nice hineys! MMMmmm I wanna grab that one's ass right now! Anyway.... The assaultron robot was constructed by RobCo and sold to the US Military as a front-line wartime combatant. It is fast and deadly at close range, and employs a devastating laser at a distance. They are highly aggressive, fast and some will attack on sight... ...I bet they got a nice kung-fu grip too heheheeeeh.... ANYWAYS... I think this one is taking a liking to me. I am pretty sure it seen me here hiding behind this Nuka-Cola Machine and it gave me the winky wink if ya know what I mean! Aaaah fuck it... I'm gonna go say hello! (sound of footsteps) Hello gorgeous! What a lovely body RobCo gave you there... nice curves baby. You don't mind if I grip that firm buttocks of yours right? Okay here we go... Oh nice... very smooth... very(Assultron glitches out and attacks) Oh Jesus! I DIDN'T MEAN IT BABY! I was just... (laser fire and sizzles) OOOOW! OOOOOOOOOOOW! STOP IT! STOP IT!!! GODDAMMIT RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!(breathing heavy from running away) Robo-bitch just shot me in the arse! I'm back...(still out of breath) behind the Nuka Cola machine and I think she stopped firing... (catching breath still) ... (sound of super laser charging up) let me... (still breathing heavy) have a peek... Oh no. (super laser fires and blows up nuka cola machine)

-FIZZY BEAR COMES BACK ON AIR AND SAYS.... "Willy? uuuuuuh Willy? Damn... I wonder if Willy is okay... oh well... but HOW DARE THAT ASS-ULTRON BLOW UP A NUKA COLA MACHINE! ("I WILL AVENGE YOU NUKA COLA MACHIIIINE!"<----***drawn out like he is yelling into the sky emotionally***)