SeamSTRESS

My 25th Birthday. 

I had just completed an order for one of the wealthiest (by marriage) women in California, and next door neighbor to Kim Kardashian. She wanted a replica of Marilyn Monroe orange silk chiffon mermaid dress with glittering sequins down the front. I, of course, swapped sequins for Swarovski crystals, 6,000 of them which I hand strung as dangles down the entire front of the dress. She was wearing this gown top Frank Sinatra's memorial birthday party. The cost was $2100, over $1000 of which went to buying the crystals and the 18 yards of iridescent "sunfire" silk chiffon and silk dupioni. All said and done, after working more than 100 labor hours, I made less than $10/hr. making the gown. A week before my birthday I had finished the gown and was ready to collect full payment and ship it to her. She had paid exactly half to cover the cost of supplies. She said she was staying at a hotel in San Francisco and I could come deliver the dress to her so she wouldn't have to pay the pesky $11.95 shipping cost. Of course it was an hours drive each way for me, and I ended up getting a ride in my friend's RV while I sat in back, sewing yet more crystals down the front because im nothing if not "extra". I intended on having her pay me the remaining balance when I handed her the dress. I called her when I arrived at the hotel, and she didn't answer. I texted her, no response. I went into the hotel and gave the bellhop her name and asked if the dress could be delivered to her room. I texted her again with a link to pay the remainder of her bill and a little plea to please send back pictures of herself in the dress. The belhop assured me they would deliver it to her room. A few hours later, as we are on our way home, she texts back to say, "You should have waited for me. Unfortunately, the dress is incomplete as is and I cant wear this in public." What?! I was confused and asked what was incomplete about the dress. "Marilyn's dress really glitters in the film, and I feel this just doesn't do it justice.. also one of my breasts is slightly larger than the other from my last breast enhancement surgery, and the dress just isn't fitting them properly. It needs to be shortened as well. I will make a list for you. It's too bad you didn't just wait." Clearly she was accustomed to the belief that the world revolves around her and no one has anything better to do than to wait on and serve her highness. I was furious. To top it off, a last little good night text read, "I will complete payment when the dress is done right. If you had waited I would have just handed it back to you. Im not comfortable with putting such an expensive garment in the mail, so you'll have to come work on it at my house in Calabasas, next week will be fine." As if her lopsided boob job and sending me incorrect measures was my fault. My friends raved and raved with me and we decided we would all drive 8 hours south to her house together, and make it into a birthday trip. Of course, I didn't have the money to buy more crystals, and the brat woman was withholding payment until I came down there and sewed more crystals to the gown.. I asked my parents to buy the crystals as my birthday gift, and then made the sad realization that literally everywhere online was sold out of the "fire opal" crystals... It was the night before my birthday and we were on the long drive headed to her house, as I desperately called every bead store in LA praying someone had packages of these stones. There were 20 here, 40 there, nothing that would make the difference this woman wanted to see. By the way, Marilyn's Dress didn't even have crystals, it had freaking cheapo sequins!!!! Finally my mom found a place that had enough crystals, paid them over the phone, and my friends and I slept in the RV in the parking lot waiting for this store to open at 9am because the brat woman asked me to be at her house at 10am and not be late as she had a "busy day". I arrived at exactly 10am to her mega mansion which had two giant freight trucks from Macy's parked in the driveway. She opened the door and welcomed me and my friends in, I carrying my heavy sewding machine and a bag of crystals, needles and threads. Inside her foyer with 30 ft ceilings, men from Macys balanced on ladders hanging Christmas decor and decorating the biggest fake Christmas tree I've seen in my life. It nearly touched the ceiling... it must have come in piece by piece! She showed me to her Dining room where she had me set up. A view of the valley below out the window. Three little bishon friseé dogs follow her around then start mercilessly tipping and growling at me. One bites my ankle and I resist whacking it back. She laughs, "Oh he doesn't like you, how funny! Hmm". Like owner, like pet. My friends leave for the day and she introduces me to her husband, who is immediately creepy. He owns a fleet of helicopters used for filming and supplies the government with helicopters. I notice a shiny black helicopter outside, just sitting casually on a pad on the giant green lawn. He pours himself a scotch, and she says, "Well let me show you the dress so you can begin. Follow me". She walks down a maze of hallways to a bathroom and closes the door in my face. Ok. She comes out in a few minutes in the gown, and it actually looks amazing on her. I can't help but be awed, she however, is sorely disappointed and immediately starts pinching and picking at the fabric, how everything "sits" on her, can there be more fabric here, less there, and of course, "Now you can understand, I couldn't disgrace Marilyn by wearing... THIS... to her favorite man's birthday party!" I just smile. "I know you said you have a busy day, so take it off and I'll start right now". She undresses in front of me this time and I can see scars all around her breasts and strange lumpy yet flat stomach indicative of too much liposuction. It's impossible to impress an insecure woman who hates her body. The most difficulty clients are always the ones with standardized visions of "surgical female perfection" poisoning their well of self confidence. I already know there will be no making her happy today. 

  I begin work, on my 25th birthday, at the very end of a dining table at least 30 feet long and she excuses herself into a secret elevator as she yawns, "Its time for a nap, I'l be down to check your progress in a few hours". Unfortunately she leaves her little able biters with me, and they never stop growling and biting at me. A couple hours in, her husband meanders back into the room to ask me questions like, "So, are you from around here?, How old are you?, Do you have a boyfriend, if you don't mind my asking?" Yes, I say. I was seeing someone at the time that I'd truly adored and was quite happy with him. Ther husband sits right next to me with his third scotch and starts singing along to the Christmas Carol's that have been blasting on the surround sound all morning. He stares at me, unmoving as he sings, "I'll have a blue Christmas without you" over Elvis. I look up and smile politely as he suddenly looks very serious, locking eye contact and keeps going through the entire song. I don't know if it's more uncomfortable to break eye contact and keep sewing, which is very loud and would likely offend him.. finally the song is over, and I quickly start sewing before the next one starts. He doesn't move, and he doesn't look away. He starts singing "Baby it's cold outside" both parts.... He gets up to make another drink after that, and comes right back over. He just sits there, staring at me, smiling. I finish the alterations and it's time to stay hand sewing each crystal bead on. He reaches out for my hand and puts his on top of mine.  "Such soft skin" he whispers, nearly drowned out by the rocking Christmas tunes, and in perfect timing, the elevator doors begin to open. He flings his hand back so fast that he knocks it against his drink and fumbles to keep it upright. His face is suddenly bright red. She glares at him from inside the elevator. She steps out slowly and turns to me, "Still not finished?" Her dog bites me again and I yelp but she doesn't react.  "I have to go to the party TOnight! It needs to be done before 6!" I smile, "yup, it will be, just sewing more crystals on, as you requested". She walks off to inspect the Christmas decor. The husband winks at me, stands up dramatically and follows her. The Christmas carols seem to get louder as I work as fast as I can, stabbing my fingers again and again as I poke through the fabric, attach a crystal, again, again, again.. It's 5:53 when I finish and she's been pacing the dining room for the last 20 minutes,  just sighing. Finally, I announced, "Its finished! An extra 1200 crystals!". She has me follow her to her bathroom, slips it on and agrees that's it's lovely and done. I send her ther link to finalize payment again and she says, "It took too long to finish and I have to go now so I'll pay you in the morning". Ok.. and I wait outside for my friends to pick me up. We go to the most wonderful birthday dinner with my friends Jessamyne and Diandra and her then Boyfriend, at The Seven Sisters in Topanga Canyon, and then to Jessamynes apartment to change before we went out dancing at  parties. I was expecting a happy birthday text from my guy, but nothing all day from him.. I reach out and say, "You won't believe how bad my birthday started out.." to gently remind him... He replies after a while, "I doubt it tops my bad day." Oh. "What happened?" I ask. "Well, I say my ex girlfriend at work, and I realized no one can ever compare, and I'll never love anyone else". My heart stopped. I was crazy in love with this idiot. Like obsessed.. I was heart broken and furious all at once. I was bewildered. We had dated over a year previously, my first love after divorce, then he left to go study at a school a few hours away and said we couldn't do the long distance thing. I was hearty broken then too. And worse yet when he chose another girl to be with who lived in the same town as me. When they broke up, he reached out again and I was so stupidly happy that I spent all my time driving back and forth since he didn't have a car... I have always had a thing for losers. Anyways, there I was on my birthday, all kinds of sad and angry, staring at my stupid phone. "Why do men find me so disposable?" I texted back. He replied, "it's not so much that you're disposable as she is irreplaceable. I never thought of you in a romantic way, we were just having sex". This was news to me. Bad fucking news. I didn't tell my friends because I didn't want to cry. I silently texted him a verbal beat down. I would cry after the parties, when I was alone. We went out all over town crazy dancing to underground parties in our sheer dresses that still shocked everyone in 2015. 

  The next morning I woke up to an email from brat woman.. "I'm sorry, but the dress is still unfinished and I morally cannot reward you for a job not well done. I will not be completing payment. I hope this can be a lesson to you to take your work more seriously and have some respect for other people's time. Sincerely, Her Fucking Bitch Name". I laughed hysterically, long past ther end of my sanity rope. It was time to unleash the beast... My weapon of last resort... I forwarded the email straight to my mom. My mom is the National Debate Champion. She changes rules and laws simply because is not worth arguing with her. She will verbally mutilate your brain before you can think a single defensive thought. She annihilates, and growing up this made me into a person who never finds it worth defending herself, and I had no experience in the matter. It's how I got myself into so many uncomfortable situations and didn't complain. I learned the very hard way, and am still learning to make my kem boundaries. But on this super shit birthday, she was most excellent. Within a few hours the bill had been paid, and brat woman even sent me a picture of her smiling in her dress! I bet I can find the original emails too... =)