Another Story

Sorry, I haven't posted for a bit. A couple of dramas popped up and have been taking a lot of my attention. 

This is a story I wrote a whole back because I wanted to write a really detailed "Mental Change" story, though I felt like it needed some work, so I've rewritten it and added and changed stuff a few times, but then started to think that it was better in the beginning and I've just been making it worse.

...Maybe I have? I strongly considered editing it back to the way it was at first, but I've decided to just say 'Screw it' and eventually post it.

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Jesus Christ, I hate this fucking town.

This fucking little copy-paste nowhere bumfuck anthill of dull, plastic prefab houses full of copy-paste plastic prefab people. 

To call it White Bread would be an insult to bread.

I took another drag of my joint and looked over at Slash. He was the only other person I knew who hated all this shit as much as me. 

It almost made up for what a pain in the ass he could be sometimes.

Even he looked a bit like a fucking poser as he stood there in his ripped leather jacket with his huge Mohawk and ears and nose like Swiss cheese. 

I'd always favoured the "skinhead with a billion tattoos" look, myself - but I suppose us punks have to stick together in Smalltown Hell like this.

He was sulking even more than usual. He'd barely even wanted to get high and break shit with me.

He rubbed at his huge black eye pretty often. He really should have been glad for it: it made him look like a bit less of a poser. 

The day before, I'd tripped that inbred meathead Brad as he walked past my locker.

Of course, he'd gotten all mad and slammed me into the wall.

Looking at his furious face that close had really brought home just how much his big, beetley brows made him look like a fucking ape.

God, and this was the town's Golden Boy - captain of the football team, moistener of a million panties.

He was pretty much exactly what my dull, disappointing parents wanted me to be - a thought that somehow becomes more and more disgusting every time I have it.

...Anyway, as he was shouting in my face, wet flecks of spittle landing EVERYWHERE, Slash had apparently decided to make something out of this, and pulled out his knife.

I couldn't even see him, but I knew what he was doing when I heard that fucking stupid laugh of his. Brad hadn't seen it at all - he'd still been turning when his best buddy Chad had put Slash down with a single right hook to the eye.

Yep - you heard that right: Brad and Chad, school football heroes.

You couldn't make this fucking dumb shit up.

Anyway, Slash was pretty much unconscious as the two of us were dragged off to the Principal's office for the third time this week.

Suspended for a month, police called, weapon in school, antisocial, blah blah blahdy-blah - it was boring at this point.

Anyway, the x-rays eventually showed that Slash hadn't even broken a bone - somehow that made it worse for him, especially with what a bitch he'd been in whining about it.

Chad was a hero, defused a dangerous situation and blah blah fucking blah.

Jesus Christ, I hate this town.

My father had gone absolutely ape on me, of course. "When was I going to fucking grow up this", "Military School that".

I'd barely been able to sneak out today, and Slash was still being such a sulky bitch I'd had to drag him out.

...The huge amount of weed and uppers I'd managed to score eventually being what changed his mind.

It's like there's no loyalty!

I was in that kind of mood where you just want to go somewhere kind of urban and run-down and listen to music as loud as you can, and smoke pot publicly until some old lady calls the police - then fuck off when you see them coming and go and break a few windows.

...And, as if I needed another reason to hate this fucking town, THIS was about the best it could do - a loading dock opposite a boring strip mall in the middle of the fucking suburbs.

There was literally a florist RIGHT THERE! - a florist whose windows might not be quite so intact tomorrow, with their big stupid paintings of happy-face flowers.

I took another drag and reached down and turned my boombox up a little louder still.

A little old lady walking past frowned at us. I barked at her like a junkyard dog.

The look on her face was priceless.

Jesus-Fucking-Christ I hate...

My phone rang. I pulled it out - okay, so my father had noticed that I'd snuck out...

Nope, not him. Not any number I recognised. 

Slash looked over at me, questioningly.

I shrugged and answered. It was probably just a scam call, I did the thing where I put it up to my ear but stay completely silent. 

Let's hear what THEY say first...

"Oh, Hey Sid!" A maybe-familiar voice said. 

I stayed silent.

"I'm watching you right now, by the way - you just kind of standing there being delinquents. Not even bullies or thugs - you'd LIKE to be that, but you're just kind of scrawny and pathetic and no one takes you seriously."

I nearly hung up then.

"Anyway, you doubtless don't remember me - I'm just another one of those faces that you scowl into every now and then. But I just noticed you over there doing your antisocial punk thing, and thought I'd take advantage.

You see - long story - I've got this thing that can list and edit the profile information of OBJECTS - it's pretty tricky to explain, but actually really easy to use, and I thought I'd try something.

See, right now I'm looking at all of the words that could possibly describe you and your buddy over there - 'teenager', 'immature', 'mean', 'selfish', 'antisocial', 'student', 'son'... Man, there's a LOT of them... 'Frisbee champion'? What?"

I nearly blushed. Everyone was a dumb kid once.

"... And, oh look, 'Pathetic' is here! Right next to 'Vandal' and 'Misogynist'."

I took another drag of my joint and considered hanging up. Whatever this idiot weirdo was doing was unusual, at least.

"...Anyway, I just wanted to talk to you for a moment before I tried my experiment. See - I told you that I can edit these? Well, I'm just about to try that with you and your friend, but I'm really just going to delete EVERYTHING and replace it with, like, ONE WORD.

See, it tells you to be careful doing that in the 'Help' section. Apparently everyone is a LOT of different things, and if you make them just one thing it's often a bit weird, because they just become, like, a perfect stereotype. Like, the Platonic ideal of that thing. Like, it would be very difficult to describe them using ANY other word, because they really are JUST that thing... Anyway, I'm about to try that with you two.

Just an experiment, you understand. I guess I just want to see what happens, really?"

Slash had started to lean in now, trying to listen to what was being said. 

I lowered my toke. "So... Nice prank," I said. "When does it get funny?"

"Oh, in just a second!" The voice said breezily. "I might be calling back in a moment"

"I won't be picking up" I said, and ended the call.

He was laughing when it cut off.

Slash looked at me, quizzically. 

"What was that about?"

I went to take another puff.

"Just some asshole who thinks he's funny" 

If this fucker really DID go to school with us, then sooner or later, I'd recognise his voice.

That'd be interesting... For him.

I was halfway through breathing in a lungful of smoke when it happened.

It wasn't really all that different from things that have happened before when you take a pretty big hit all at once.

I just suddenly had an image pop into my mind, clear as day. 

It looked almost like a stock photo, like a clip art thing.

It was labelled "CHEERLEADER!".

Like, that word was floating beneath it in kind of a bubblegum pink sporty font.

It was just an isolated picture of a girl. 

A teen girl. 

A blonde girl. 

A pretty girl.

She was maybe a bit tall for a girl - maybe not. She gave the impression of maybe being tall because of how long and lean and toned and athletic she was.

Like, not a track-and-field kind of athletic, A softer, rounder, girlier kind of athleticism.

A dancer's body, is what I guess you might call it. 

She was pictured with her long, long legs kind of tucked up - like she was mid-leap. 

It's not something I've ever really noticed or been into before, but the muscle definition on her upper legs and thighs was just... Mmmmmm.

Her delicate arms were raised high above her head, clutching excitedly at big pom-poms. 

Her hair was two long golden blonde pigtails, streaming and bouncing around her face.

Her uniform was instantly recognisable, it was certainly sexy - the pleated skirt was very, very short, and her top left her midriff and navel bare.

But there was the sense that her body was being downplayed just a bit by her uniform - like, the bulge of her tits looked absolutely scrumptious, but somehow you got the sense that they were being undersold.

That they were huge, perfect, bouncy things being made to play nice and perky by a sports bra and tight top.

Her uniform had those double white lines at the edges... Do you know what I mean? How cheer outfits always seem to have those? 

...But, really, in talking about her sexy uniform and her perfect body and her ecstatic pose, I'm kind of going past the thing that you really noticed, the thing that really stood out.

Basically, it would be enough to describe those things by saying that she looked pretty much exactly like Barbie - slender figure, slight but glowing tan, long long golden blonde hair...

No, the thing that really grabbed you was the look on her adorable, beautiful, perfectly made-up face: that look of pure, almost drunk enthusiasm and glee.

You could somehow tell she had big blue eyes to go with her little button nose, but they were closed tight, squinted shut by the sheer force of her infectious, luminous grin.

She had the unfeigned smile of someone who doesn't understand how everything can just be so TOTALLY UTTERLY goshdarned PERFECT! How everything, just EVERYTHING can be so pure and joyous and WONDERFUL! And who just wants to make the world understand just how GREAT it all is! 

She was just SO THRILLED, SO ECSTATIC to be a little white-bread blonde bimbo bouncing her teenage curves beside a cornfield in a nowhere hick backwater that no one would ever care about.  

She was the perfectly perky avatar of innocent girlish enthusiasm, excited and overjoyed to dizzily reflect the world's sheer delightfulness back to itself.

...Also, from the way her tiny skirt was flying up you could tell she had an amazing ass.

The image kind of vanished, but it just left that word kind of buzzing in my head.

CHEERLEADER!

For a moment, I just stood there, trying to process what was suddenly different, and then I realised that the street was suddenly silent.

I turned and... My boombox was gone. Just gone. 

Like, there's no way someone could have snuck up and there's nothing it could have fallen behind. 

It was just GONE.

I went to take another puff, and... That was gone too.

I looked down at my empty hand, then over at Slash.

He was looking kind of weird.

"You're wearing a skirt" he said.

I looked down. 

So I was.

A little skirt. 

A TINY skirt, even.

A tiny little flippy pleated skirt, with those double white lines at the hem. 

My legs looked ridiculous. Stubby and hairy and ending in Doc Martins. 

I vaguely suspected that people could kind of see my ass.

I looked back to Slash. "You are too", I said. 

He'd noticed. 

CHEERLEADER!

Was I... was I wearing a bra? 

I could feel it under my shirt. I could see the little straps on my shoulders. And in my mind, I could see what it looked like: the delicate lace, the little frills, the size of the cups...

I'd been a bit worried, amidst all my excitement when my boobies started to get big - worried that they might get TOO big, like Cathy's did and so she had to give up ballet? But it turns out cheering isn't like ballet - it's not a bad thing to be bouncy and jiggly and...

I looked back at Slash. 

He had his hand up under his uniform skirt. He slapped a hand to his mouth in shock, or kind of to his mouth: he instinctively kept it JUST far enough away to keep from ruining his make-up.

It was for the best, too - that lipstick was PERFECT for him! I'd have to ask him what colour it was! Not only did it perfectly complement his eyes, it matched his hair bow too!

...Oh fucking god what the fuck was happening...

A weird feeling from my chest and my hands flew to my top, yanking it upwards... pulling... My pretty little girly pink bra tearing... And... And...

CHEERLEADER!

I just stared. 

CHEERLEADER!

I'm sure my mouth was hanging open and my eyes were boggling.

CHEERLEADER!

If you'd asked me to describe "Cheerleader Tits", I really don't think I'd have been able to, beyond a few generalities, but now, looking at them...

I had Cheerleader Tits.

Like, it was so obvious that that was what they were.

If I took a picture of them and put it on the internet, every single person would think 'Gosh, what an amazing pair of Cheerleader Tits!'

It would be almost completely nonsensical to describe them just as 'Tits'... I mean, they were - but they were utterly, indefinably, undeniably Cheerleader Tits.

Someone who had never heard of cheerleading would be easily able to deduce the entire concept from a single, momentary glimpse of them.

"B-Becky!" Slash gasped beside me, "You have Cheerleader Boobies!" 

I did.

I had Cheerleader Boobies. They were mine. They were ME. I could feel them. The weight of them. They were... Perky. And pert. And BIG. 

And JIGGLY. I moved very slightly, and I felt their jiggle. Their constant movement. Their outthrust softness. Their WIGGLINESS.

They were getting just a bit cold.

I touched one. 

One of my Cheerleader Boobies.

I couldn't help but make a little sound. I was so sensitive. My delicate cheerleader skin so perfect and soft. My hand moved to cup my right Cheerleader Boobie just enough to dampen its slight natural jiggle, and my finger lightly brushed my big, pearly nipple. My lightly upturned, pert, perky, saucy nipple. My cheerleader nipple. My young, pink, firm but soft, so warm but tingling in the cold, cheerleader nipple. 

It was wobbling just slightly, I could feel it, on the end of my big creamy Cheerleader Boobie.

I made the noise again, deep in my throat.

A Cheerleader Sound.

My Cheerleader gaze slid past my Cheerleader Boobies for just a moment, down to my Cheerleader Navel, perfectly placed in my bare Cheerleader Midriff.

A breeze blew and I felt my tiny sexy Cheerleader Skirt brush against the soft flesh of my Cheerleader Ass. My big, bubbly, soft-but-firm, round-but-heart-shaped, Cheerleader Bum. I could feel the swell of my perfect Cheerleader Bumcheeks. Just big enough to bounce and tease, just enough to bulge from my Cheerleader Panties, just enough to shape them into a sexy little triangle of fabric that flirtily advertised the ripeness of my nubile Cheerleader Figure.

Just big enough to tease and flirt without being slutty. Just enough to still seem innocent when my bouncy Cheerleader Dance sent my flippy little Cheerleader Skirt up to give a brief dick-hardening glimpse of my big perfect Cheerleader Ass.

CHEERLEADER!

I could feel them. My long, perfect, bare Cheerleader Legs with their smooth Cheerleader Knees and perfect Cheerleader Feet. 

A breeze sent the slightest tendril of my long, shiny Cheerleader Hair across my Cheerleader Face and brushed across one of my big Cheerleader Eyes with its huge Cheerleader Eyelashes on its way to my cute button-like Cheerleader Nose.

I made the Cheerleader Sound again, my bare Cheerleader Boob bouncing so warm and happy and perky in my little delicate Cheerleader Hand. My Cheerleader tongue lightly brushed my big Cheerleader Lips, tasting my perfect Cheerleader Lipgloss in the best Cheerleader Colour. Somehow my Cheerleader Mind sensed with my Cheerleader Senses that my hot, quick little Cheerleader Tongue and Cheerleader Lips with their perfect natural Cheerleader Pout and Cheerleader Smile could give just THE most perfect Cheerleader Blowjobs when I was down on my Cheerleader Knees, my innocent Cheerleader Gaze warring against the Cheerleader Blush of my Cheerleader Cheeks and betraying the Cheerleader Heat I was Cheerleader Feeling Between my Cheerleader Thighs as I Cheerleader Sucked and Cheerleader Licked and Cheerleader Panted with Cheerleader Horniness as I Cheerleader Swallowed and Cheerleader Cheerleader Cheerleader Cheerleader...

I wanted to give a real Cheerleader Scream.

"Becky!" I heard from beside me. "I... I... Have a Cheerleader Pussy! I'm totally a Cheerleader Girl!" 

OH GOSH GOSH ME TOO I COULD FEEL IT MY PERFECT CHEERLEADER VIRGIN CHEERLEADER PUSSY JUST CHEERLEADER WARM AND CHEERLEADER TIGHT AND CHEERLEADER READY JUST LIKE A GOOD LITTLE CHEERLEADER LIKE ME SHOULD BE!

CHEERLEADER!

I'M A PERFECT LITTLE

CHEERLEADER!

OH GOSH JEEPERS! HOW COULD I BE A...

I had a sudden flashback to that morning, to every morning.

Waking up when the sunrise beamed in through my window and onto my smiling face.

Bouncing out of bed, straightening my fluffy pink comforter, and giving my stuffed toys Fluffles and Mr. Beary a little kiss before tossing open the window to whistle along with the dawn chorus of the birds for just a moment. 

I eventually had to stop, giggling - they always got SO excited when I joined in! 

I bounced into the shower, and I was scrubbing away, singing one of my favourite songs.

Taylor Swift was AMAZING, of course, but sometimes she could get a bit... DARK and ADULT, you know? 

This is why I had my special playlist: "Becky's Happy Songs!", Full of, like, K-Pop and Boybands and, like REALLY retro stuff from the 90s and 80s! I played it some times in the lockers before a game just to help everyone get into the right mood! 

I bumped into Daddy in the hall after I'd finally decided how I was going to do my hair and my makeup - it was a game day! GAME DAY! So I was wearing my uniform! Normally, Kaylee and I had our outfits coordinated, so we could match the colours! So I always knew what I'd be wearing, but wearing my uniform was just WAAAAAY different! 

So, yeah, Kaylee and I always coordinate - it makes people think we're sisters or TWINS! Even more often than they already do! I always have long pigtails, and Kaylee always has her long ponytail - one time, though, we swapped! Just to see if people would get us mixed up! AND THEY TOTALLY DID! IT WAS SO HILARIOUS! Of course, Kaylee IS like my sister! Just like my REAL little sister Bree! Oh, Bree is like my perfect little butterfly and she is SO cute and she's going to be trying out for the team next... 

Oh yeah, so as I was saying, I bumped into Daddy in the hall! And I was like "Good Morning, Daddy! Isn't it just a WONDERFUL day!" And I kissed him and had to hide my giggle because he was holding onto his coffee cup and he just looked SO bleery eyed! 

It's SO funny how people can sometimes look like that in the mornings! Even Bree sometimes!

IT'S SO WEIRD! 

I was talking to Kaylee about this! And she said...

CHEERLEADER!

I blinked and looked down.

I was wearing my cheer uniform top now too.

And my bra was so full. And heavy. And bouncing.

I knew without looking exactly what panties I was wearing. How happy and colourful and girly and frilly and lacy they were.

How they had that little satiny bow.

I remembered choosing them.

I remembered shopping for them.

I remembered what Kaylee had said when we first found them.

"Oh!" I finally managed to squeak out. "Oh... Oh Gosh! Oh Gosh Darn!" 

WHY WERE BAD WORDS SUDDENLY SO HARD TO EVEN THINK!?!?

WHY WAS I BLUSHING JUST THINKING ABOUT THINKING THEM???

"Oh, Gosh Darn! Oh Gosh Darn Heck! Is... Is this me now? Am I THIS?"

I had my hands on my boobies again. They were so warm through my uniform.

"I CAN'T BE! THIS CAN'T BE ME! I CAN'T BE THIS GIGGLY BARBIE BITCH! I'M NOT SOME BLONDIE CHEERLEADER BIMBO!"

I somehow heard Slash bristle beside me.

"Um... Cheerleaders AREN'T bimbos, Becky!" He said. "We're just HAPPY!"

I turned and nodded at Kaylee.

"... Why do people HAVE to be gloomy all the time?" I asked. "And, besides, you need to maintain at least a B-grade average to be the Captains of the Cheersquad, so..."

I had a sudden memory of sitting in class, Kaylee and me.

It wasn't a Game Day, so we weren't in uniform, we were in our coordinated tank tops and miniskirts. Baby Blue for Kaylee, and Baby Pink for me.

The teacher was at the front, he looked so bored and tired.

"Who can tell me what the capital of Uruguay is?" He asked.

OH GOSH I KNEW THIS IT WAS IN THE BOOK

I looked at Kaylee and I could see that she knew it too!

We put our hands up so fast!

The teacher yawned slightly.

"Does anyone ELSE know...?" He eventually asked.

We were bouncing in our chairs now!

He eventually sighed.

"What's the answer, girls?" 

Kaylee and I shouted out at the same moment "Asunken! It's ASUNKEN!" We're giggling, it's SO EXCITING!

He looks at us for a moment, then "You mean Asunción, the capital of PARAGUAY... The capital of URUGUAY is Montevideo"

I can see the look on Kaylee's face out of the corner of my eye. She can obviously see the look on mine too.

We try to hold it in for a second, but we both end up breaking out into helpless giggles.

IT'S JUST SO FUNNY! YOU HAD TO BE THERE, THOUGH! SHE JUST LOOKED SO...

The teacher looks at us for a moment and sighs.

"Save it for practice, girls" he eventually says as he stalks back to the board.

"Cheerleaders..." He mutters  under his breath.

CHEERLEADER!

I feel like all my thoughts are in italics with an exclamation mark at the end!

It's SO weird! 

"Becky," Kaylee says "are those your pom-poms?"

I look over.

Yes, they are!

I pick them up and we instinctively start to wave them in sync.

"I'm, like, a cheerleader, Becky!" Kaylee says as she bounces her hip just enough to send her skirt flying, her pom-poms high above her golden hair.

"Oh, I know - me too!" I agree, as I dance along in sync.

"But, I'm like, a TOTAL cheerleader!" Kaylee continued.

I nodded around my the shimmying of my chest. 

"That's what the voice on the phone said - it said it was going to make us COMPLETE AND TOTAL cheerleaders! Like, nothing else! Like, the cheerleaderiest cheerleaders ever!"

We thoughtfully did a jump and fell naturally into a splits, right there on the pavement.

I suddenly noticed a little boy with an ice cream cone walking along with his mother.

He was frozen, staring at us with his mouth open.

I gave him a wink and waved a pom-pom at him as his mother started pulling him along.

He was just SO cute!

Kaylee turned to me. "So... We're like..." She couldn't remember the word. "STEREOTYPES?... We're just like total cheerleader stereotypes?" 

I nodded.

Kaylee looked thoughtful. "Becky... Are we the Cheersquad Captains?"

Oh Gosh - I guess we were!

"I mean, we don't really THINK of it as being in charge" I said. "We're more like the Cheersquad's cheerleaders! I mean, sometimes the other girls can feel all gloomy or not peppy enough or need to be encouraged... AND THAT'S WHAT WE'RE FOR!"

Kaylee was nodding emphatically. "...Like, remember when Emily was SO SURE she'd never be able to do that quintuple backflip? She really just needed someone to cheer her on! And remember how GREAT it was when she finally realised she could do it!?!?!"

I giggled, but had a slight catch in my throat.

That was surely one of my proudest and happiest memories! Everyone in the team had hugged and cried for SO long!

Kaylee and I were standing back up now.

"Kaylee," I said gravely "we're like total cheerleaders!" 

She looked at me.

"Like..." I continued. "I have big boobies, and everyone can see my belly in this sexy uniform, and I think maybe even my ass kinda!"

Kaylee leaned and looked slightly, before nodding.

I was fiddling with one of my pigtails, like I always do when I get nervous. "Do... Do you WANT to be a cheerleader? Like, a giggly happy perky sexy dancing girl?" 

Kaylee looked distracted, then her eyes widened.

She turned to me, clutching her hand to her mouth, but again leaving just enough room to not ruin her perfect makeup.

"B-Becky! I'M DATING CHAD!"

I blinked at her "I'M DATING BRAD!" I said.

Oh Gosh! We were cheerleaders, the heads of the cheersquad, and total stereotypes... Of COURSE we'd be dating the star players! 

Oh Gosh! I was dating Brad! I WAS DATING BRAD!

I'd noticed him a long time ago, of course - still feeling like a shy little girl, never dreaming that he'd notice ME!

I'd cheered him on, of course... Maybe even MORE enthusiastically than normal.

When he'd first winked at me after a touchdown, I'd thought it must be a mistake!

He couldn't be looking at ME, right? At little Becky???

It had been SO cute when he'd asked me out!

He'd been SO nervous! 

BRAD had been nervous to ask ME!

He'd had to bring Chad along for support... Chad who'd immediately asked out Kaylee!

... And suddenly we were double-dating! It was amazing! 

Brad was just SO...

Well, he was BRAD! Just thinking about him made me feel so... It gave me that weird funny tingly feeling!

My nipples suddenly felt so big in my little bra! My panties felt so...

Oh No! I'M DATING BRAD I'M A LITTLE GIRLY GIRL CHEERLEADER AND I'M DATING BRAD AND HE'S SO SEXY I FEEL FUNNY I WANNA I WANNA...

This time, I gasped and Kaylee looked at me.

I was blushing. I didn't think I wanted to say it... I couldn't say it... I COULDN'T say that... That...

"I... I gave Brad my virginity!" I said. 

I could feel how wide my big blue eyes were, how hard I was blushing.

Kaylee gasped and blushed too!

"Chad and I... We... We've..." 

I remembered it now, ALL of it!

Everyone had been saying, right from the start - be careful of that Brad, Becky! You're a really sweet, innocent little girl, and he might try something!

BUT IT WASN'T LIKE THAT AT ALL!

He'd been SO sweet! And SUCH a gentleman!

He hadn't even asked to see my boobies before I'd taken off my top that first time!

It had been after a game, of course. We'd been kissing in his car. I'd been in his lap, his big strong warm arms around me. I always just felt so tiny and precious and little and safe! 

My nipples had just felt SO big! And TINGLY!

I just suddenly wanted him to... I don't know, TOUCH them, KISS them maybe!

...And I'd remembered - OH! Boys like boobies, right? They like to look at them and touch them? 

...And I have pretty nice boobies! At least, I think I do? I'd seen, like, bigger ones in pictures and stuff... And maybe boys don't like the kinda high stand-up sorta ones that I have? And my nipples are pretty POKE-Y and pink and they get redder when they get real big... And...

OH GOSH WHAT IF BRAD DOESN'T LIKE MY BOOBIES! WHAT IF I TAKE MY TOP OFF AND HE LOOKS AT THEM AND HE DOESN'T LIKE THEM!!!

HOW COULD I LIVE????

...I mean, I THINK they're pretty good? Like, my bra size is one of the pretty big ones, and that's good right? And I notice boys trying to look at them sometimes... Even teachers! And there's that one tanktop that Kaylee and I got - the one that's, like, pretty LOW... And Mommy and Daddy's eyebrows went way up the first time I wore it to school... When I'm, like, leaning over in that, I sometimes look up again and a whole bunch of people are kind of staring quietly and look red and quickly look away...

That's GOTTA be good... Right???

I was SO nervous when I started to take my top off!... Brad even put his hand on mine and asked me if I was sure - He's SO SWEET! - but I just nodded and pulled it over my head. 

I unclasped my bra and just felt SO NERVOUS! And then I slipped it off and...

Brad was just so quiet for so long. His face got so red.

I didn't quite know what that meant! 

After a bit, I started to look down too. It was a bit cold - they looked even perkier than normal!

... Eventually, I asked him if they were good - my back was starting to cramp from pushing them out so hard.

I wanted him to get the best look he could! 

He just suddenly looked up at me, his face was completely red and his eyes were glassy.

He swallowed so heavily.

He just whispered "CHEERLEADER TITS!..." 

He started to touch them then.

Oh GOOOSH! Just the memory makes me squirm! 

It was SSOOOO amazing! SSSOOOOOOO good! 

My nipples especially!

...And he told me after that my boobies were the BEST! 

He's SO sweet and amazing and great and...

And that's why I eventually decided to give myself to him.

I was saving myself for marriage... Kinda. 

I mean, I know that's what Good Girls do - and I SO wanna be a Good Girl... But, I mean, Brad and I were just SO obviously meant to be together forever... Did it really matter if, maybe... We were a bit early with some things?

It was after prom - It was the most romantic night EVER! I just felt SO warm and pretty and loved...

My dress made me look JUST LIKE a Princess! EVERYONE said so!

...And I FELT like a Princess too! 

I had decided earlier that night, as Brad and I were dancing! 

I told Kaylee, and she was thinking the same thing! 

We were so happy and nervous and excited! 

It was in the backseat of Brad's car... I think some people think backseats aren't super-romantic... And they're WRONG!!!

I lay back, he was kissing at my throat, we lifted my satin-y dress and... Well...

He was big. Like, BIG!

They say expect football players to be BIG, but...

Just FITTING HIM IN felt like it took forever, but in the BEST POSSIBLE WAY!

At first, he kept stopping, and asking if he was hurting me - and I guess he kinda was, but IN THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY!

Oh GOOOOOOSSSSHHHH! It was SOOOOOOOOOO good! Better than I ever could have thought! 

It felt so good, I couldn't even talk, I just kept gasping and making this kinda MMMmmmMMmmmmmmm sound and pulling him into me, and I think he got it.

Eventually, EVENTUALLY, he was IN me, kinda? And he was, like, pushing and OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!

I don't know how long it's supposed to, like, GO for? But it felt like it went forever! 

Every single time he pushed in, I would suddenly see a vision:

Brad on his knee, holding out a ring!

Me all up in huge white lace, looking into Brad's perfect eyes as the minister speaks!

Feeling so warm and little and SAFE in Brad's arms as he carries me across the threshold!

Brad in his suit, opening the door to crowds of rushing rosey-cheeked children as I pull a roast from the oven and wipe my hands on my big apron...

"OH BRAD! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, BRAD!" I eventually shouted out and... And... 

Look, I know a lot of girls kind of... Experiment? Kind of PLAY around with their bodies? 

I NEVER did! 

If I wanted to feel great, I'd - like - do a backflip or think of a cheer or listen to "Becky's Happy Songs!" or play with the neighbour's puppy...

I... I really had never... I never even knew that...

Oh. It felt so good.

Brad felt so good, inside me. His warmth rushing up inside my belly! It was just so... So...

Trvhjkvssfghbhkkkpjb

What do you even say, ya know?

I talked about it with Kaylee afterwards, and it had been JUST THE SAME with her and Chad!

...But what I almost nearly didn't tell her was... Well...

I mean, there's some things I love. Like, LOVE! 

Cheering, Dancing, Mommy, Daddy, Bree, Kaylee, Brad, Mr. Beary, Fluffles...

I... I think I kinda wanted to add something to the list... Um... "Little Brad" (BIG Brad, more like...)

Maybe it's weird, but I'd obviously never even SEEN an actual... penis... Before, and well...

It was kind of amazing. 

Brad's was, at least - I'm not really interested in any of the others!

I mean, I guess I can see how it could look kind of weird or whatever, but it was just SO... WARM... And LONG... And SOFT but HARD... And BIG! 

And lovely!

And just wonderful!

Like, I think I LOVE Brad's... Little friend.

I was writing a cheer for it in my mind as we were doing it... Is that weird? That's probably weird, right?

The next time we were making out after a game - oh GOSH! - I just HAD to SEE it! I just had to FEEL it!

It was SO amazing and warm and great! Even better than I remembered!

...And I had a special cheer for it and everything!

I was kinda worried that this might be... Well... Too weird for Kaylee.

...And... Is it SLUTTY?

Gosh - am I SLUTTY now? Can you be slutty for one person? Cause, if you can, I am TOTALLY slutty for Brad! 

But Kaylee isn't my Twinsy and Best Friend and Sister from Another Mister for nothing!

She'd been thinking EXACTLY THE SAME THING! 

AND HER CHEER EVEN SOUNDED SORT OF LIKE MINE!

We started to talk about... Look, I'm not a baby! - I know that girls, like, put their boyfriend's... Thingies... Like in their mouths... And between their boobies and stuff.

We'd never even thought about it, but suddenly we were just really interested in trying it!

We really had no idea how to do it! 

After trying to Google it, we eventually found some pictures and stuff... Kinda gross, but it gave us the idea (... And maybe a few others... ;) )

And then we talked to Debbie on the squad... People said SHE'D know about this stuff, and she thought it was really funny that her Cheer captains were suddenly so serious about asking her all this stuff, but she really helped us out!

(I think she was being a bit silly sometimes, though - she said all this stuff about butts that's gotta be a joke)

...Anyway, eventually, I told Brad that I wanted to try it out!

It was kind of embarrassing, I'd put it off - what if he said No? What if he thought I was weird???

But he was SUPER sweet about it! OF COURSE he was!

He's Brad! And Brad's just the BESTEST boyfriend EVER!!!

I don't think I was very good right away.

I was still in my cheer uniform after the game, and I got down on my knees and tried opening his pants...

(OH GOSH! I COULD FEEL IT IN THERE! IT WAS HARD AND MOVING!)

I found his fly and stuff kind of confusing - or maybe I was just nervous... Or overexcited... But he helped me out, and I was blushing so hard! 

Anyway... I know some girls do this thing? Where they like half-swallow it or something? 

I'm not quite there yet, I still don't really understand that... (THOUGH OF COURSE I'M SO *EAGER* TO LEARN!)

I guess I'm more of a beginner still, so I kind of just thought of it like a big - a BIG - lollipop.

Debbie said that could work, so I just sucked on it in my mouth and tried doing some stuff with my tongue.

It was SO yummy, but I wasn't sure if Brad would like it, so I was looking up at his face the whole time, trying to work out if I was doing good.

I guess I probably looked pretty silly - on my knees in my cheerleading costume, my hair in my long pigtails with their pink ribbons, his BIG thing in my little hand, looking up at him with my big blue eyes, trying to look straight into his eyes to gauge his reaction, probably looking kinda shy and uncertain, and all the while sucking and slurping and licking at his delicious....

Oh it was so good.

And it TASTED so good.

I tried to maintain total eye contact, I really did - I wanted SO BAD to know that it was just as good for him as it was for me! 

...But after a while, it could get kind of hard. My eyes just wanted to cross and unfocus and roll back SO bad!

...ESPECIALLY when he started to... Um... Well...

It tasted SO good.

Kaylee and I talked it over with Debbie afterwards. We weren't sure how it had gone, and wanted to know how we could do better.

At first she just laughed hard as we told her about it, and that made us feel kinda bad - but then she said that it had actually gone really well.

So I'm not sure, it's hard to tell with Debbie - but Kaylee and I are working with her now.

We REALLY want to work out this half-swallow thing... AND YOU SHOULD NEVER UNDERESTIMATE A CHEERLEADER'S DETERMINATION!

We've, like, got a whole special notebook for it - we tried finding some of those weird videos again and we've been taking SO many notes!

(...There's this kind of boobie thing that sometimes goes along with it that I wonder if Brad would let me try...)

...And, since then, well...

Since Brad made me into a Lady, and introduced me to this whole new amazing world... Sometimes I...

Well.

The other night, I was lying in my bed. The lights were off. The door was locked.

I was just running through the latest game again in my mind. One of my hands was... Um, in a very PARTICULAR place... My fingers kind of rubbing, kind of TICKLING.

I'm still getting the hang of this stuff! Maybe I'm doing it wrong!

I had my pom poms in my hands - It just felt right!

I remembered as clearly as I could when that big toss had sailed over everyone's head... UNTIL STEVE JUMPED UP AND GRABBED IT! 

IT HAD REALLY BEEN AMAZING!

AMAAAAAZING!

"Be be AGGRESSIVE! Be...!" I murmured into my pillow, my ass instinctively wiggling away in time with my cheer.

One hand shaking that pom pom... The other...

OH! Everyone had been SO amazing! We're the LUCKIEST cheerleaders EVER to have this team! I keep telling all the other girls that, and it's TRUE!

OH! When they'd made that pass! IT HAD SEEMED IMPOSSIBLE BUT *THEY* COULD DO IT! OF COURSE THEY COULD!

"GO, TEAM! GO!" I muffled, as loud as I dared, into my pillow.

My nipples were just as big and hard and tingly as they'd been when I'd been watching it happen! 

The rustling of the pompom between my legs picked up.

OH! OH! OHHHH! AND THEN BRAD HAD CAUGHT IT! OF *COURSE* HE HAD! 

BRAD!

My... My BOYFRIEND!!! WE WERE GOING STEADY AND EVERYTHING!

... And he'd just run SO fast! He'd made it look EASY!

My legs flew open, just as wide as they had when I'd done the splits at that moment.

"Woah! Woo! WOOOO! GO, BRAD! GO BRAD GO! GOOOOO! WOOOOOO...!"

Both my pom poms were shaking, my ass was bouncing...

BRAD WAS RUNNING! THEY WERE TRYING TO STOP HIM, BUT OFF COURSE THEY COULDN'T! THEY JUST COULDN'T! I WAS CHEERING SO LOUD! IT WAS SO AMAZING! I FELT LIKE MY BOOBIES WERE ABOUT TO BOUNCE RIGHT OFF MY CHEST!

...And...

...And...

...Annnnnnnnd...

TOUCHDOWN!

Oh! Oh! OH! OH!!! OoooooooOooooOOoooooooooohHh...

...

Brad...

...

...

Oh, the way he'd picked me up and kissed me afterwards... 

The whole... Ooooooooooo...

...

I really am the luckiest little cheerleader in the whole wide world!!!

...

...

...Oh... Oh Gosh! Are my pom poms going to smell funny now...? 

...

OH GOSH! I TOTALLY *AM* SLUTTY FOR BRAD!

...

Kaylee was looking kind of uncertain now - I know her so well!

She does this thing where she kind of fiddles with her pom-poms and doesn't smile so much.

"Becky..." She finally said in a little voice "I've had Chad's... PEEPEE... In my mouth, like a lot! I've like sucked on it after almost every game! 

...And... I've LIKED it! I LOVE being on my knees and looking up and seeing Chad's face grinning down at me as I, like, LICK it and SUCK on it, and... And I can like feel his... His STUFF melting in my hot mouth and on my tongue and I just LOVE how it feels and tastes..."

She kind of bit her lip.

"... Shouldn't I, like, not WANT that, Becky? Shouldn't I be all angry and stuff and be mean to Chad and NOT want to have his..." She blushed and looked back and forth before whispering it "...yummy THINGY in little mouth or my... SPECIAL PLACE... Like, at all?"

She stared at me.

She was real, REAL serious! The only other time I'd ever seen her this serious was when she was afraid she was going to fail her English Final and get kicked off the squad! 

I wanted to reassure her (just like I had then - of COURSE she had it! She was SUCH a smartie-bear and had worked SO hard!), But I suddenly realised that I was pretty confused about this stuff too!

I just kind of looked at her, wishing I knew how to make her feel like her normal, cheery self again.

Her hand had come up and was unconsciously tracing the bumps of her nipples through her tight cheer top. I don't think she even realised how hard her nipples were poking through her top from just thinking about this stuff.

...Oh gosh - was I doing that too? When did that start?

Eventually, I just said "I don't know, Kaylee - I just know that you're my bestest friend EVER! And as long as we're together, I'm SURE everything will be alright!"

She smiled again at that and we hugged and bounced a bit.

Kaylee suddenly got that look on her face again.

"Becky! Is... Is that part of the STEREOTYPE? That cheerleaders, like, date the star players and they, like... Get down and... SUCK stuff after games? And before games for good luck? And also on their birthday? And also sometimes when..."

I thought and nodded "I think it kind of is, Kaylee!"

She suddenly gasped and did that I-Want-To-Slap-My-Hand-To-My-Mouth-But-My-Makeup-Is-Just-SOOO-Perfect-Today thing again.

"B-Becky! Aren't cheerleaders MEAN!?! Like, in stereotypes?"

Oh Jeepers! I hadn't even thought of that!

Weren't cheerleaders in movies kind of mean? 

"I... I don't WANT to be MEAN, Becky!" Kaylee whimpered.

I thought about it for a moment.

...But we weren't really mean, were we?

"...I don't think that's, like, a CORE stereotype, Kaylee." I eventually decided. "Like, most cheerleader movies like 'Bring It On' or 'Hellcats' or 'Fired Up' or even like 'Sugar and Spice' and 'Cheerleader Camp' - the cheerleaders are mostly... Like us!"

She nodded sagely. We could of course recite every single line of every one of these movies... And so many more! We'd both been watching them on a loop since we were babies! 

It was all just SO COOL and EXCITING! We'd watched them a billion more times at the Squad Slumber Parties!

I continued, I was really warmed up now: "In OTHER things, there's like 'Mean Cheerleaders' or 'Bitchy Cheerleaders' - but they're, like, always CALLED 'Mean Cheerleaders' - never 'Girl Cheerleaders' or 'Pretty Cheerleaders'... or 'Happy Cheerleaders'... Because being a Happy Pretty Girl must be a CORE part of the stereotype, but being mean isn't... That's why they have to, like, specify 'mean' and 'bitchy'"

Kaylee stared at me, obviously SUPER impressed.

Yeah, who's a dumb BIMBO now!

...And I just HOPE that's true, though! I REALLY don't want to be a meany! Oh gosh! Just thinking of being mean to Mommy and Daddy... Or Brad! Or - oh gosh! - Bree! Just makes me want to cry!

Oh Gosh! HAD I been mean to them?

Like, BEFORE?

A man walked past.

He looked hard at us, at our uniforms and legs and hair and bellybuttons and ribbons and little skirts and hard nipples.

"Hey, girls!" He finally said with kind of a weird smirk. "Nice uniforms!"

"Thanks!" We both called back and waved our pom-poms happily.

It's SO nice when people are friendly! And when they realise just how AMAZING our uniforms are!

Kaylee nodded and giggled "We TOTALLY designed them ourselves!" She said, beaming with pride.

...Wait... Had we?

Oh, of COURSE we had! We were the Squad Captains! 

The memories came flooding back! 

We'd had to choose the new uniforms for the team! 

The responsibility was so immense! But so EXCITING!

We'd both felt like little girls again, but were SO determined to treat this with the seriousness that it demanded!

We'd called a special Squad Slumber Party and gotten everyone special colour-coded pens and made everyone write down their thoughts and requirements and preferences on my special Puppydog Notepaper.

We'd ended up with like fifty pages of notes - pretty much all in Kaylee's purple ink or my pink one.

We'd SCOURED every catalogue! Every picture! Tried to work out how to screenshot movies (...We eventually just used our phones to take pictures of the screen...) 

We had SO many ideas! We'd worked at it for weeks after school! 

We'd sat there surrounded by pictures and catalogues and notes... Each with our special matching cups of hot chocolate and just tried to narrow things down until WAY TOO LATE!

It was so hard, but it was SO FUN!

Some things were ESSENTIAL, of course:

They had to be PRETTY!

They had to be HAPPY!

They had to be GIRLY!

They had to be TIGHT!

They had to be SHORT!

They had to radiate SCHOOL SPIRIT!

Maybe our thoughts are a little bit retro. We worried about that, but we checked with the squad and the teams and they were okay with it.

We decided that cheer uniforms need to have SKIRTS! Not just skirts, FLIPPY PLEATED SKIRTS!!!

I know more and more people are going with, like, shorts or leotard things or like little tight things... But we think that that look is SO important!

It's part of the TRADITION and HISTORY of CHEERING!

Ballerinas wear tutus and tights!

Flamenco dancers wear those pretty dresses!

...And cheerleaders wear little pleated skirts! And you can see their bellybuttons! And they have ribbons in their hair! And...

Gosh, the TRADITIONS of cheerleading are SO rich and complicated!

That must be part of what makes it so exciting!

It was SO incredible to do our part to continue them! 

Like #Blessed for real!

When we eventually got it all worked out, we were so excited but so nervous! We got two mocked up so that we could be sure that everyone liked them!

We came up with a special routine with special cheers and performed it for the Squad! We REALLY needed to know what they thought!

...And we did it before a practice for the entire football team too!

Cheering is REALLY about THEM, after all! 

Everyone was SO supportive! It was SO AMAZING! 

Brad and Chad EVEN WANTED us to wear them after practice, for... Well, YOU KNOW!

Brad kept telling me how sexy I looked! Like, even more then usual!

He couldn't work out if he wanted his hands on my butt or in my top all night! ... And they were both easier to reach than our old uniforms, so!

They were kind of expensive, though - we had to have SO many carwashes!

Kaylee and I had found these amazing little matching bikinis, and the other girls tried to match them too!

We'd learned SO MUCH about cars!

We'd gotten SO GOOD at reaching all those little places - cheerleaders have to be FLEXIBLE after all! And all the boys LOVED it! 

Kaylee and I would try bending into hard places TOGETHER sometimes, and they liked that even more! 

...And, like, our tops... Well... Sometimes they kinda POPPED a bit or got sort of loose!

It was SO funny! Everyone laughed! Kaylee and I were always having to help each other to squeeze back in! 

It was CRAZY! 

The other girls tried their best, but Kaylee and I ended up going by far the longest every day - and that's okay! That's our responsibility as Squad Captains! 

We know everyone's busy and we just want everyone to just DO THEIR BEST! AND THEY DID! 

The whole Cheer Squad is SO great! We're SO lucky to get to cheer them on as they become the BEST CHEERLEADERS they can be! 

It was SUCH an ACHIEVEMENT for EVERYONE that first game when we all got to wear the new uniforms for the first time!

We were SO PROUD but also kinda nervous?

But it went GREAT! 

EVERYONE told us how great the new uniforms looked! Like, just people in the hallways! 

So the boys loved them! I wasn't even sure they'd notice!!!

Brad and Chad did this thing after they ran out through the banner that we'd made, where they came over to where we were dancing and cheering! They totally kissed us! Like, in front of everyone! 

And everyone CHEERED!

... And then they did this thing they do now, where they sneakily slip a hand under our tops and, like, squeeze our boobies! For good luck! 

I don't think they even could have done that with our old uniforms!

It's so amazing! We love it!

We just COULDN'T stop giggling as the game started! 

Cheering at a game is... It's the BESTEST thing ever!

I've talked to Kaylee about this to try to work out why.

We think it might just be the time when everything's as it SHOULD be... When everyone sees the world like US.

Everyone has crowded together and they're just SO excited! So excited to watch other people do their VERY VERY BEST and they just want to cheer and shout and dance and do EVERYTHING they can to make everyone be the VERY BEST they can be! And when someone does something AMAZING, they'll be JUST as happy and excited as if they did it themselves! 

Everyone's happy and excited and helpful and nice! 

No one's gloomy or angry or selfish or mean... Everyone just wants what's best for EVERYONE!

I'm so happy, so so so so happy and humbled and grateful that I can be a part of that: that I can dance and bounce and sing and express that joy and that beauty and that WONDERFULNESS that everyone is feeling at that moment! 

Silly little Becky in her silly little happy clothes with her silly little pigtails and her silly little songs and cheers can be part of something so SPECIAL! 

...Oh! Oh Gosh! I'm gonna cry!

I heard my phone ring then.

Behind me in my little purse. I instinctively reached down and picked it up...

Yep, it was the same number as before! Right there on my pink little phone, with its picture of me and Kaylee and Bree and Brad on its lockscreen and the phonecover that kind of looked like a happy bear face.

Kaylee gasped and did the hand-almost-to-her-face thing.

"...Is... Is it?"

I nodded, numbly.

"B-Becky! D-Don't answer it!" She quailed.

I thought for a moment.

...But what would happen if I didn't answer it?

I answered.

"H-Hello?" I said, feeling very little and unsure.

OH! I wish Brad was here!

"Oh, Hey - Becky!" The voice said jovially. "How are you and Kaylee doing?"

Kaylee had bunched up so we could both hear. She was pale.

"W-We're fine..." I said, "W-Wha... W-Who... W-Whaa..."

He laughed.

"Anyhoo," he finally said "I think this little experiment went kind of interestingly... Wouldn't you agree?"

I didn't know what to say. I looked at Kaylee. She clearly didn't either 

"...So I guess my only question would be..." He continued. "... Do you want me to change you back?" 

I felt like a weight had fallen into my tummy. 

Oh Gosh! - This was the question I'd been dreading.

How... How do you even?

Kaylee looked at me, her eyes were more full of dread than I'd ever seen them before.

It broke my heart.

...But... But what to say? 

Yes - I loved being Becky! 

...But hadn't Whats-His-Name - that person I'd been before - LIKED being himself? And HADN'T wanted to be me?

He thought I was silly! He thought I was embarrassing! And dumb! And girly! And a BIMBO!

...And he hadn't liked Brad AT ALL!

I... I had to be fair... What would THAT person say now?

I looked over at Kaylee. She was biting her lip. I could instantly see that she was thinking the exact same thoughts as me!

"... Hello?" He voice said.

OH GOSH OH GOSH OH GOSH

WHAT WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO???

THE *RIGHT* THING?

I opened my mouth to say something...

And - wait a moment! HE hadn't liked being himself at all!

What was his name?

HE had been so angry! And bitter! And miserable about EVERYTHING! LIKE, ALL THE TIME!!!

He had been... OH GOSH! Had he been doing DRUGS?!? Like, REAL drugs???

...And listening to the angriest, meanest music super loud JUST TO UPSET PEOPLE?

Old Mrs. Piltz had been SO startled when she'd walked by! 

...And... And HE WAS GOING TO VANDALIZE THE FLORISTS!!!

Sweet, sweet Mrs. Johnson's florist shop! She'd given them SUCH a good deal when they'd gone there to buy a get-well-soon bouquet for Cindy! And Trisha! And Mr. Drape! And Principal Smith!

...Why would anyone want to break her pretty window???

The one with the smiling flowers that ALWAYS made me feel so happy when I walk past it!???!

I looked over.

Kaylee is truly not just my Sis, she and I must somehow share a brain... Oh, I guess we kind of do? We're kind of the exact same STEREOTYPE! We must be basically the same person!!!

That must be how I knew just from a look that she was having the EXACT same thoughts as me! 

Oh! OH!

...Was I... Was I fighting with Daddy? Was he... Was he MAD at me? AND MOMMY! Had... Had I made Mommy CRY???

AND BRAD!!! I'D BEEN *SO* MEAN TO BRAD!!!

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY!!!!

...And... And... AND... OH NO! OH NO! 

I'D BEEN MEAN TO BREE!

I'D MADE BREE CRY!!! 

SO SOOOOO MANY TIMES!

...Like... Like, that time she got braces and she was soooo self-conscious about them! I hadn't sung her a song and cuddled up to her and made her feel special and okay again AT ALL!

I'd waited until the moment she was feeling the very worst, when she was just so shy and sad and little and... And I'd...

OH NO! OH NOOOOO! 

I COULDN'T have! I COULDN'T have done that! 

ANY of it!

It was like a horrible nightmare!!!

I heard the voice starting to talk again through the phone.

I looked up at Kaylee. She was like a mirror.

She was almost sobbing! I could never have imagined that she even COULD look that sad!

We both shouted out at the same moment:

"NO! NO, MR MAN! WE DON'T WANT TO CHANGE BACK! WE DON'T WANT TO BE MEAN! AND ANGRY! WE DON'T WANT TO... WE DON'T WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE SAAAAAAD!"

We were actually crying now.

The voice paused.

"So... So you WANT to be cheerleaders?"

"YES!" We shouted 

"...You WANT to be giggly big titty blonde bimbos who shake their asses for the whole school?"

"YES! ...Not that cheerleaders are really BIMBOS, we're just HAPPY and why do people HAVE to be gloomy all the time and also you have to maintain a B average to stay as Squad Captains and also our little skirts are really this short and flippy because we need to do lots of tumbles and cartwheels and backflips and..." 

The two of us eventually bit our lips.

"...And you WANT to date Brad and Chad?"

"OH GOD YES! THEY'RE SO SOOOOOO AMAZING!"

He sounded like he was really enjoying himself now.

"...And you WANT to suck their cocks on the backseat of their car? And you WANT them to squeeze your big titties in front of the whole school each and every game?"

We were blushing a bit, but definitely "YES! We LOVE that!" 

There was a little pause, then...

"Well, glad to hear that, girls!" 

Kaylee and I looked at each other and took a deep breath.

That awful weight in my tummy finally felt like it was lifting. 

The voice started again:

"Look - Becky, Kaylee - I'm gonna to be honest. You're both great girls - really the best. Brad and Chad are ridiculously lucky to have you..."

We both smiled. I wiped away a few tears... Oh, I hope I haven't ruined my makeup too much! 

The voice continued:

"So, just while I have your profiles open... Do you want anything? Do you want me to ADD anything to you? To make any changes? Add any words?

...Rich? ...Supermodels? ...Lucky? ...Valedictorians?"

I looked at Kaylee, and she looked at me.

Gosh! We really are the same!

"No, thank you, sir!" We said together. "Everything is already JUST PERFECT!" 

I could hear his smile now. "I thought you two might say that... Well, be seeing you at the next pep rally!" 

He hung up.

Gosh! What a weird day! 

We were kind of stunned as I put away my phone, and we collected our purses and pom-poms... Why had we come here, again? 

OH YES! We were picking up the flowers we had ordered specially for Kaylee's parents' anniversary! 

Mrs. Johnson had been SO Nice!

We were already feeling peppy again as we danced down the sidewalk. Oh Gosh! How could ANYONE feel gloomy on a wonderful day like today! 

There was a game tomorrow and we were just SO EXCITED!!! We had SO MANY special things planned!!!

A man grinned at us as we bounced past, we shouted Hello and waved our pom-poms for him!

Oh, this was the BEST PLACE in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!! Everyone was SO Nice! And everything was SO pretty! 

Sometimes I feel so happy I feel like I could just BURST!!!

Gosh Jeepers, I LOVE THIS WONDERFUL TOWN!!!