Son for Hire Interlude: Papi

A short interlude to see what Kiki was up to between chapters 49 and 55.

***

Her arms hugged tight around her Kiki waits at the curb for her ride for the night.  It was a warm evening but she was still getting chills as the physical effects of her addiction withdrawal hadn’t quite disappeared completely.  She is thankful to see the long city bus turn the corner at the end of the block and head her way.  It would be warm in there.  About two car lengths away Kiki spots the driver’s wrinkled friendly face light up as he spots her.

The bus stops, the doors open, and the balding pudgy man behind the wheel welcomes her aboard.

“Kitty.”  He says in that Puerto Rican accent that Kiki knew so well.  He knew her real name of course, they’d known each other for years, but a miscommunication during the first time they met had stuck to become an endearing nickname.  He watches her pass by, she offers no fare as usual and that was fine by him.  “Long time.”

“Too long.”  She settles into the seat right at the front, her usual seat, and lets out a long relaxing breath.  “Hey Papi.”

He pulls the doors closed and starts off again.  There was no reason to dally, he knew she would be there for the rest of his shift.  For the spirited young prostitute this bus was her holy sanctuary and Papi her pastor.  Whenever she needed an escape from family pressures or a night off from work or a kindly ear or simply somewhere warm and safe this is where she would come.  She never shared just what this route and this driver meant to her, not even with her brother, as this was something precious of her own.

Kiki looks about the dim bus.  At the back there were a couple of teens with their faces down into their phones and older guy about halfway down with his nose buried in a book.  “Slow night.”

“Yeah.”  He says.  “Just the way I like it.”

Kiki smiles.  She knew he was going to say that.  If Papi was one thing it was predictable.  No.  Not predictable, dependable.  He drives on in silence.  He knew that she would open up without prodding when she was ready to talk.  Kiki sits for a time just content to watch Papi drive.  She feels the comforting hum of the engine and the too hot warmth of the heaters and enters a state of calm content.  People come on, people get off, and the city lights stream by as they always did.

“I’m moving.”  She says at last.

“I heard.”  He nods.  “I also heard you were in the hospital.”

Kiki shrinks in her seat.  “Yeah.”

“We were gonna visit but you were already out by the time I found out.”

It touched Kiki hearing he would have come.  She knew him well enough to know he wasn’t bullshitting her either.  Even after all these years the old fella still humbled Kiki.  “You didn’t need to.”

“Yeah, I did.”  He says matter of fact.  “I was glad you got out so quick though.”

“Yeah.  Donny got me through it.  I'm feeling better now.”

“What’d I tell you Kit?  About that junk.  What did I say?”

“I know Papi.  You warned me.”  She says guiltily.  “I’m cleaning up now though.  I’m going straight.”

He gives a firm nod.  “Good.”

“I’m going to try anyway.”

“You’ll do it.”  He says without a hint of doubt.  “You’re too damn stubborn to give up on something you set your mind to.”

She laughs.  “I hope you’re right.”

“Aren’t I always?”

“Yeah, you are.”

“And how is your brother?”

“Good.  Great!  It’s because of him we’re getting out of here.  He’s got this once in a lifetime thing happening.”  She says.  “I don’t know why but he’s hauling his trouble making sister along with him.”

“Because he loves you.”  He says with his usual blunt honesty.  “He’s a good kid.”

“Yeah.  The best.”

Papi asks no probing questions about the move, content that Kiki would share what she was comfortable with in good time.  Not one to mince words he says what he is feeling straight out.  “I’ll miss seeing you.  You always brightened my night.”

“Oh Papi.”  Kiki lets out a sigh.  “I’ll miss you too.  I’ll miss you most of all.  Fuck.  You’ve been the closest thing to a father I’ve ever had.”

This brings a smile to the old driver’s craggy face.  “I always wanted a daughter.”

Kiki leans her curly haired head against the barrier that separated the seat from the stairs and adoringly gazes at the man with real love in her heart.  Papi was nearly old enough to be her granddad, had a unglamorous job, and was certainly nothing special to look at but Kiki would have been his girl in the blink of an eye had he ever once suggested it.  Lord knows she’d offered her services to him often enough.  His heart belonged to another however.

“How is Jean?”  She asks.

“The boss?  Fatter and meaner than ever.”

“You’re so bad.”

He carries on.  “And her eyes are going now so she always squinting.”  He looks back at her with an exaggerated ogre like scowl.  “Imagine coming home to that every night?  I wish I was the one who needed glasses!”

“You’re the worst!”  Kiki laughs a hearty laugh.  Never once had she heard him say a kind word about his wife yet she knew the man loved her with every fiber of his being.  Just for old time’s sake Kiki offers one last time.  “Well, if it’s that bad, if you want a night with a pretty young thing…”

He chortles, fully expecting the indecent proposal.  “I’m good, thanks.”

“Last chance.”  She says with the teeniest iota of hope.  “No charge.”

“No charge?  No cojones.”

“No cojones?”

“Yeah, me.”  He thumbs at his chest.  “The boss finds out and…SNIP!  No cojones.”  He straightens up in his seat.  “Nice to know I still got it though.”

Kiki is beaming.  “You do indeed Papi.”  She says.  “And how are the kids?”

“Pain in the ass.”  He gripes.  “But good.”  He glances back at her.  “Don’t have sons.  You won’t have a moment’s peace.”

She laughs.  “And daughters are better?”

“Mmm.”  He considers it a moment then chuckles and shakes his head.  “On second thought, maybe not.  Too many worries.”  He taps his temple.  “Crazy boys do in your head.  Drive you loco!”  He taps his chest.  “But girls, they do your heart.”

“Do your heart?”

He shrugs.  “I dunno.  Seems to me anyway.”

“I’m not sure what you’re saying but you’re probably right, as usual.”

“You need to be a dad to know.”  He agrees sagely.  "It's a dad thing."

And so it goes.  With an unspoken understanding that this might be the last time they see each other the pair talk through the miles and through the night.  The natural rhythm of the other riders coming and going is barely noticed as they go around and around Papi’s long inner city route.  The minutes speed by and quickly turn into hours as they bask in the warmth of their unlikely friendship.

Along the way something strikes Kiki.  An echo of feelings she’d experienced very recently.  Good feelings.  As she listens to Papi tell a story of his three boys nearly killing each other by mimicking the moves of the pro-wrestling show he’d recently taken them to it hits her what it was.  Papi was the only man she knew who talked to her with a particular type of care and confidence, one that she found very appealing.  It was comfortable, it was safe, and it let her lower her guard.  He didn’t look at her with the oh so familiar veiled eyes of a man curious about her romantically or sexually.  He didn’t look down on her like so many men did once they found out what she did.  He didn’t look up to her like Donny.  He simply spoke with her as equals but with something deeper going on as well.  Respectful yet with a sort…masculine authority?  Papi was a man who knew himself and held himself with an old fashioned kind of honor that was a rarity in the world today…just like Alan.

Papi and Alan were very different men.  Alan stern and stuffy, Papi jovial and full of dad humor, Alan yearned for comfort and quiet, Papi embraced the chaos of his exuberant family and the world that he encountered on his route, Alan focused on status and material things, Papi contented with the joys of family and friends, Alan a muscular behemoth, Papi short and pudgy, and yet there were commonalities too.  They were both older, both wiser, both fathers, both had good hearts, and both were well settled in their home lives and careers.  The fact that Kiki had, at the spur of the moment, decided to drop the name Kitty for Alan to use certainly heightened the echoes.  She keeps her focus on the moment but she found the connection of these two disparate men…curious.

Too soon Papi’s shift is over.  He switches the sign to ‘Out of Service’ and heads for his last stop of the night.  They ride in silence the last few minutes until at last he pulls up the same curb he’d picked her up at.  Thankfully there was nobody there waiting.  He opens the door and the pair of them get off the bus.  With the diesel engine chugging in the background they face each other.

“I will miss you Papi.”  She says with tears in her eyes.  "More than you know."

He offers a hug, she takes it.  “If you find your way back, don’t be a stranger huh?”

“I won’t.”

He hugs her tight.  “Look after yourself.  Okay?”

“I will.”  She promises with all of her heart.  They part and step away from each other.  “Um…as soon as I have that money I owe you…”

“I know.”  He cuts her off, making it clear he never really expected to be paid back.  “No rush.”

She starts to break, a fat tear rolls down her cheek.  “Y-you…don’t know how much you helped us.  Helped me.  I couldn’t have…I just couldn’t have done it.  You can’t understand what you mean to me.”

“Ah Kitty.”  He rests a hand on her shoulder.  “You’re the closest thing to a daughter I ever had.”  He taps his chest with his other hand calling back his talk of daughters earlier.  “You're in there now.”  He then reaches back to pat his old bus.  “And I’ll be in here, if you ever need me again.”

“Oh Papi!”

They embrace once more.  They hug, holding it just a little longer this time, then part again.

“Well.”  He says.  “I better get home before the boss wonders where I am.”

“No cojones?”

He nods with a grave look and makes a snipping motion with his fingers.  “No cojones!”

She laughs and watches him climb back into his bus.  He settles into his seat and looks down through the open door.

“Goodbye Kiki.  And good luck.”

“Hey!”  She says.  “That’s the first time you used my actual name.”

With a smile and a wink and he closes the door then pulls away.  He would head back to the garage and then home to his own family.  Kiki watches Papi’s bus go and stands tall.  She felt good.  She felt strong.  She felt well.  Better than she had in ages.  With that done the final tether to this neighborhood had been released.  She was now truly ready for her new life.