Nethe, Chapter 1

After she found clothes, she wandered the streets for hours. Nethe felt impossibly lost and small. The human's tall, bleak buildings glared down at her, threatening to fall at any moment. Human-made machines rushed through the streets with a terrible stench and clamor of sound. She did like looking in the windows. Sometimes they showed a quiet little place to sit and eat- how exotic!- and sometimes they showed bright treasures. She lingered at one longingly- small jewels, in bracelets with moving parts- and only moved on once she reminded herself that she had nothing to barter with.

The other thing that she noticed, after a time, was that the same poster was placed on many walls.

Sensing that it was important, Nethe stopped in front of one and frowned in concentration. The black markings wavered, stubbornly resisting her understanding. For a moment she was afraid she had lost her abilities entirely when being banished- but the markings resolved into reason. Her heart gratefully slowed down.

And then she actually read it.

The humans were recruiting people to go to the island. She'd recognize that shape anywhere, a crescent that ringed the grand harbor. That dip, there- that was where her little river met the ocean. Her island was drawn on glossy paper, posted hundreds of times around this human city.

Nethe felt a spark of outrage. Mira had died trying to help the humans, under the belief that they were some sort of refugees. And yet here was proof that the humans had lied. They had come for a reason, or serving someone who had a reason.

Kalin had been right, after all. She had said that they should stay quietly in the grove and mind their own business. And Kalin was neither dead on a temple floor or banished to a stinking human city, so clearly she had had the right of it.

Grimly, Nethe took note of the details.

'It looks like some kind of military operation.' She frowned, hugging her sides. 'Fitness requirements, eligibility test, age limits- good grass they want younglings. Age 18-25? That's ludicrous.'

But of course, she realized. The infants had aroused sympathy among the fae. The humans must have noted that, and were trying to capitalize on it.

Fine. She hardened her resolve. Here was her route home, handed to her so easily. She did not need to fly in a random direction and hope to see familiar land before she tired and drowned. She would infiltrate these humans's operation.

The registration center was easily located from above. Too much daylight had passed- all the humans that she saw were exiting the building. So Nethe huddled on a ledge and waited, eminently grumpy about the imposition. In the night she risked a flight down to read the letters on the door- ah, it had a set of hours written.

She had a spark of comprehension. Those were the same markings on the jewelry that she had liked. The jewelry was for this purpose, measuring time.

That was sufficient reason to steal a shiny thing, Nethe decided cheerfully. She wheeled through the night sky, path easily lit by the human's fireless torch system. Now that she understood the shiny, hard air, she only braced herself before barreling through it. It shattered, and a similar high-pitched wail cut the air.

How rude. She did not appreciate all those sounds.

Nethe shook her feathers with a huff and flapped up onto the counter. She scanned for what she wanted, mulling over the options. She knocked some things to the floor with her wingtips by accident- how odd, she felt like she was in that awkward growing stage when her mind hadn't caught up to her wingspan) and chose a shiny by process of elimination. She bent over and picked it up with her mouth, not caring to form hands at the moment. And then she flew away with her prize.

Before she went far, the streets below lit up in a riot of color. Nethe laughed in delight, and altered her path to fly above the cheerful thing. It had a ring of light, flashing with blue and red and white. It was as if the human city was playing with her. It wailed as well, but this sound was less of an affront.

For a bittersweet moment, she felt like she was flying above the river. Kalin was below, darting above and below overhanging brush for the thrill of it. Mira was watching from above, long-suffering and ready to untangle a foolish little sister. The brother who had died young was there as well, whole and hale, not a drop of the water that had drowned him on his feathers.

The moment passed. The toy turned, heading in the direction that she had already come from. She could not go back. She did not want to do backwards.

Depressed, Nethe took her flight higher and circled away. She went back to waiting on her ledge. Before the sun rose, she remembered that she should find a private place to grow arms so that she could store the bracelet. A rooftop worked for that purpose, and it boasted a comfortable perch as well. She fell asleep at some point.

When she awoke, she put on legs and a face with a mouth, so that she might blend in amongst the humans.

When the doors were unlocked, she fell in behind two timely humans. One was very tall and large, with improbably wide shoulders. The other was a less alarming size, but still had short hair and the two-legged clothing style on. Nethe glanced doubtfully down at her flowing one-piece outfit. Perhaps she was not blending in perfectly.

She followed the procedure that her companions did, taking a paper and putting marks on it. It asked for her name and information about her health. Humans seemed prone to a variety of ailments. Nethe squirmed a bit, reading the list. Heart problems- oh, how ghastly. The wrong proportion of sugar in blood? Why were they putting sugar in their blood? Misshapen feet? Were her feet misshapen?

She resisted the urge to take off her feet coverings and examine them. That would probably draw attention. Optimistically, she marked “no problem” for that ailment as well.

Someone came and accepted her paper. She was not alarmed, because she had surreptitiously watched as the same thing happened to first the large human, and then the medium human. The human woman with her paper lead her to a physical examination, which was interesting. It was quite charming, actually. The woman checked the distance from her feet to her hair and wrote a number, then she had Nethe stand on a black square and then frowned and told her that she was too light.

It was confusing and delightful. Nethe glanced between her arm- the warm dark shade of her feathers- and the pale visage of the human giving her a medical examination. The human was far lighter.

“Then you must be too light as well,” she ventured, as tactfully as possible.

The human woman gave her an expression that was caught between confusion and pleasure. She didn't answer, but she seemed a little warmer after that.

The physical examination continued with a series of silly tasks. She was asked to run a short distance, to jump over some boxes, and to do other trivialities. Nethe was beginning to enjoy herself. It was a nice pattern- she would be told to do something simple, do it, and then receive praise and admiring looks. Her examiner called over two more humans to watch her. She preened, and chose to use just a little bit of flourish when she lifted the circular stones on a horizontal pole.

The medium-sized human gave her a resentful look when she joined him in the next waiting area. The large human seemed admiring. He leaned over to speak to her across the aisle. “I heard that you set some records. Congratulations,” he said. He flashed his teeth at her.

Nethe had to suppress a flinch. They were oddly white. “Thank you,” she said. She wanted to say more, but she did not know what a human would say. Should she know about the previous records? How impressively had she performed?

She realized, too late, that she should have learned what was usual for a human before she took the examinations. She sat for a time in an increasing state of anxiety. The chairs around them filled up. Nethe stole glances at her arm jewelry and watched the little sticks move. There was a box, on the wall, that showed images. She glanced at it occasionally. A human man was talking, but only the top 1/3 of him was visible. There was a map, with little tokens of rain on it. A black and white image showed a building with a broken window- and a bird knocking over a display case.

Nethe felt her face flush. Was that her? She leaned forward, but the image changed. A human woman was laughing, now.

How had that been done? No one had been there. Was it some kind of memory-sight? Had they called a powerful priest?

She made certain that her jewelry was covered by her clothing. She tried not to look like a thieving bird.

Nethe was suddenly, uncomfortably aware that many of the humans in the room were looking at her repeatedly. Quiet conversations were being had, and she seemed to be a subject. It made her feel paranoid. It made her want to flee, but she kept herself pinned to her seat. Flying out of the room was probably the most suspicious thing that she could do at this point-

and ah, she realized, they were only discussing how remarkable she was. She felt a little better. Nethe was comfortable with praise. Yes, humans, admire me. I am marvelous. She held her head high.

The next event was a mass exodus to a large, oddly shaped room. It ascended in rows. Each row held a seat and a flat table in front of it. She sat where she was told to sit. She looked at the paper when she was told to. And she realized that the test in front of her was about Fae. It was about their traits, abilities, and how they could be killed.

Nethe brightened. Another easy task!

She breezed through the test. Of course she did! She knew the material intimately. What did the Fae eat? Not much! What hours did they sleep? About 6, starting with the brightest star was high. Easy! And fun, because she liked talking about herself. Nethe was the first to finish. Cockily, she flounced to the test's leader, gave over her paper, and went to wait in the communal area. She thought that she might enjoy smiling at the grumpy humans as they left, just so that they were reminded of her superiority.

Instead, she was told to return the next day after tests had been graded. Disappointing.

Out of curiosity, she looked at her timekeeper and then waited outside of the building. She wanted to know how long it took a human to finish the test.

The first one to exit was unfamiliar to her, a very small woman with short-shorn hair. She was wearing the same two-legged style of clothing as everyone else. Nethe made a note of it. She gave Nethe a nod. It seemed to grudgingly communicate respect.

The second human to exit, nearly on the first's heels, was the medium-sized human. He gave Nethe an angry look and stalked away.

They had taken about 10 minutes longer than Nethe had, she judged. She gave a considering hum and left as well. When she returned the next day, she was eagerly met by a new human. This one was another tall male. He took her to a private room and told her about how she was the perfect physical specimen, and had done acceptably on the test-

Nethe frowned. “What was my test score?” it should have been perfect.

He dithered, and said something about there being multiple types of intelligence, and new information, and anyway, she was still the clear treasure of this testing round.

She allowed him to soothe her ego, and hid her unease. She needed to see a graded test, she realized. She needed information. Knowing what the humans were wrong about could only help her to predict them and blend in. It would not help her to know too much.

That day, Nethe was inducted into the human military. It involved more paperwork. Embarrassingly, she needed help to get through it. But the humans were accommodating to a level that made her warm towards them, just a bit. 

She took longer with this task than the others- some people who entered the room after her left it before she did. They gave her curious looks. Nethe was relieved when she could finally complete the task and move on.

She was given some clothes and lead to a room with two beds and a door that lead to a small, cold chamber. The sight of her new accommodations filled her with dread. It was unfamiliar. But more importantly, it told her that she would have no privacy to slip into the comfort of her feathers.  

Hesitantly, she tested her sleeping space with her hand. It was… acceptable, she decided. This was how humans slept, so she could manage it.  The door opened. She turned to see another recruit being ushered in. Nethe offered a nod.   The human woman flashed her teeth and then avoided eye contact behind her heavy bangs. “Hello.” 

The door shut, leaving the two of them alone.  Confused, Nethe recoiled. She pretended to be studying her schedule again and kept a cautious eye on the human. Was it a threat? Or… just human body language? It was happening too many times for her to dismiss it as a sign of a bad personality. Nethe resolved to begin showing her teeth.

She tried not to watch too obviously as her new roommate unslung a bag onto her bed and began withdrawing all manner of objects. She cocked her head and outright stared while her roommate brought a collection of small white cylinders to the water basin, and then to the cold room.  “You can use my shampoo,” the human said, without making eye contact. Her voice was quiet but pleasant.  

Nethe decided that this human was acceptable. “Thank you,” she said brightly. She did not ask what shampoo was, because she was an expert infiltrator. “I’m Nethe,” she said.  

The human made a strange sound- a laugh, Nethe decided, but a quiet one. “I know,” she said. “We all know.” She glanced at Nethe and then quickly away. “It’s a pretty name. Where are you from?”  

She didn’t know how to answer. Nethe was silent for long enough that the room felt awkward.  

The human flushed. “It doesn’t matter,” she said hastily. “I don’t- I don’t care or anything. If you’re in the city then you’re obviously a citizen,” she said. She coughed and began cleaning her fingernails. “My- uh, my family came in during the lighter travel restrictions, when my grandfather was young. And uh.” She glanced at Nethe. “We do still get letters from the outside sometime. So I’m not… opposed, or anything.”  

Nethe nodded slowly. She didn’t know what to say to any of that, or what it really meant. Travel was restricted here?  ‘This human thinks that I have entered the city illegally,’ she realized. ‘Am I so obviously an outsider?’  

Well. Probably. She wasn’t even a human. It was a good sign that the humans had apparently decided on a backstory for her. She couldn’t be doing that badly.  

“I’m Bethany.” Her roommate pushed back her brown hair enough to make eye contact again.  

Nethe decided to like her. “That’s a pretty name, too,” she said. “Will you be joining me in the exercise later?”  

Bethany laughed. “I think that we all will,” she said. “It’s group conditioning. We’re state assets now. We’re going to be busy until we get on that ship, and then we’ll have nothing but time to fight.”  

Oh. Nethe blinked. “Would you like to fight?” she offered. “There is not much space, but I am amenable.”  

Bethany laughed again. This time she tossed her head back and shut her eyes. Nethe watched, charmed. “Maybe another time.” Her green eyes looked bright. She was prettier when she was relaxed, Nethe decided. She looked like someone that might be fun to fly with.  

Ah. Suddenly, she felt sad. She did not like that.  

Nethe changed into her assigned clothes and followed Bethany to the meeting place. 

Having a roommate made things easier, she realized. It was far easier to blend in when she had been assigned a human companion who she could copy without arousing suspicion.   

The field held only female humans, in the same white shirt and short, dark bottoms. Some seemed much more comfortable than others. There was little conversation. Nethe caught many of them examining her, just as she was examining them. Some of them looked at her and then talked to their companions. 

It made her feel self-conscious... It was probably just more praise. She had done well yesterday, perhaps too well. Nethe should try harder to appear human today, she resolved. 

“Warmup, ladies!” An exceptionally short human barked. She had dark hair tied back in a knot at her neck and a stern face. “On the line. Last names A-M are up for sprints. Treeline and back. Come on, move it!”  

Nethe wavered, not sure if she was supposed to be joining. She clung to Bethany’s side. It seemed to be the correct action, because no one corrected her. 

The stern woman made a horrible, high-pitched sound. The young women at the line began running.  

Their abilities varied quite a bit, Nethe realized. Some of them pulled ahead early. By the third back and forth, some of the women lagged significantly. 

After a time, the horrible sound came again. The first group staggered away from the running area. 

Nethe moved with her group to the line, grateful to understand the purpose of the exercise. It was acceptable for her to be better than the humans, she decided. It would be odd if her abilities were suddenly average, after all the praise she had received yesterday. But perhaps she would not try her best…  That strategy seemed to work. No one said anything to her, at any rate.  

She made it through her first day as a human military infiltrator with that strategy. There were many tasks, including a special type of walking, arm exercises, and the apparently correct method of hitting a person (Nethe had been doing it incorrectly but effectively). 

She recognized the human who had finished the test quickly yesterday, and overheard her name when an instructor praised her. Something about her quiet competence and the way she held her head up made Nethe think of Mira. It was comforting.  Despite her small size, Yamaguchi was admirably skilled at hurting other humans, Nethe noticed. Nethe decided to befriend her as well.   

Throughout this process, her human companions became quite red and wet. It seemed unpleasant. 

They flooded back to the residence area. Bethany asked to use the “shower” first. That apparently meant going into the secret room and calling forth water. 

Ah! They didn’t live by a river, so they had to store water.  Nethe listened intently for clues about what was happening, but there was nothing but the sound of water. 

When Bethany emerged with a much-improved bodily scent and wet hair, Nethe walked into the secret room and cast about for further clues. Through trial and error with the few artifacts present, she managed to turn on the water. She used the sound to buy time while she investigated the cylinders in the room. Ah! She remembered them. They were some of Bethany’s possessions. They must be shampoo.  She experimented with them, and put one that she liked on her skin. It did not absorb very well. It was disappointing.  

Bethany had changed into another variation of their assigned clothing when she emerged. Nethe copied her again and followed to a room with long tables. Nethe blinked uncertainly and fell a step behind Bethany. 

She did not understand the purpose of this exercise at all. There was an array of strange scents in the air.  She spied on some sitting women as they passed towards silver counters at the back of the room. They had rectangles with- 

Food! This was food! Nethe perked up. How exciting. “We get to eat now?” she asked Bethany.  

“We have 20 minutes,” Bethany said, which did not seem to be a correct answer. Nethe decided to forgive it. “It’s going to get busy, fast. Can you get drinks and save us seats while I get in line?”  She agreed. Of course she did. 

Nethe followed Bethany’s indication to a place where she chose two glasses and filled them with water. She smiled at other people getting drinks, but most of them avoided her eyes. Then she filled two more with something orange and sweetly-scented, because no one seemed to be guarding the drinks. Then she cast about for two seats. 

The small, fierce human- Yamaguchi, Nethe reminded herself- was sitting relatively alone. There were three seats on either side of her, and seats open across from her.  She perked up. Lucky. 

Nethe bounced over, bared her teeth in a human greeting, and set down her beverages in front of two of the seats. “Hello,” she said, cocky with her social successes today. She was doing everything well.  

Yamaguchi looked up, slowly. She did not bare her teeth. “Hello.” Then she looked back down.  

Something about it seemed odd. Hm. Then again, none of her peers aside from Bethany had talked to her yet. Perhaps it was too early to make friends. 

Nethe went back to join Bethany in line. They only needed to wait a few minutes before being gifted a tray each with mysterious treasures. For once, Bethany was following Nethe on the way to their seats.   The food was marvelous. Nethe enjoyed it immensely. At first she ate quickly, and then she realized that it would all be gone soon. She slowed down and began trying to save each bite for as long as possible.  

“I heard that you have the top score,” Bethany said. She was doing that thing where she glanced at someone and then away quickly. But this time, she was clearly talking to Yamaguchi. “Congrats.”  

Oh. Nethe looked up, interested. Yamaguchi held the knowledge that Nethe needed to convincingly portray a human.  

“Yes.” The answer was not very soft.  Bethany faltered. She looked back down at her food.  

Nethe frowned and tilted her head. “How did you do so well?” she asked.  

Yamaguchi finally looked up. “Because I take this seriously,” she said.   

Too late, Nethe realized that the human was unfriendly.   

“Because I didn’t think it would be cute to write in answers and draw pictures instead of filling in the answer sheet.” Her large, dark eyes were angry. So was her small mouth. Yamaguchi leaned forward. “I don’t know what’s wrong with you, but I’m not interested in babysitting you just because you’re some kind of athletic freak of nature. You failed the written test. You don’t deserve to be here. And you don’t even appreciate how lucky you got. We all know that you were going through the motions today. It’s embarrassing.” 

She picked up her tray, even though it still had food. “So, you’re stupid and lazy. Great combination. I look forward to working with you.”  

Nethe watched, shell-shocked, as Yamaguchi stood and stalked away.  Her heart was going too fast. She didn’t know what to say.  Bethany didn’t move. She was staring down at her food.  The humans had become quiet, Nethe realized. Conversation had cut off. With dread, she glanced around. 

More than one woman quickly looked away. One or two were smiling, but most looked uncomfortable. Embarrassed. They were embarrassed for her. Because everyone thought that she was lazy and foolish.

She blinked quickly, willing down tears of humiliation. She didn’t care. They didn’t know her. They couldn’t judge her. 

Nethe inhaled once, twice. And then she tossed her hair over her shoulder. “I’ve decided not to be her friend,” she told Bethany.  

Her roommate gave a weak laugh without looking up. “That’s probably for the best.” She put down her fork. “Let’s go. I, uh.” She began to stand. “There’s lectures tonight. You can catch up a bit. And you can ask me questions after, okay?”  

Nethe realized, with a sinking feeling, that the humans had been laughing at her all day.