Long Over-Due Update

Hello Patrons! It's been a while!

Yeah, it's been too long since giving you an update so I apologise and I'll just get a few things out of the way first.

Firstly, I'll refund all Patrons for last month's Patreon payments. I didn't produce any content last month, you pay for content, it just makes sense and I genuinely wouldn't feel right taking your cash. I know some of you are happy to pay regardless just to support me and while I'm appreciative of that support, I'd rather be above-board about it. These refunds will be processed over the next day or two. If you would like to just donate money to support my content without any strings attached, then I've got a Paypal link on my website (but obviously that's up to you).

As for why there hasn't been much content, well...it's a similar story to what's been the issue for the past 2-3 years; lack of free time. As of right now, I'm currently working on a TV-drama. As a result, the hours are long with 6am starts and 8pm finishes. And when I get back home, I don't have time to go to the cinema (without seriously compromising my sleep) and don't really have the mental willpower to write in-depth content. And then once that TV drama is over, I'll likely be working on another TV series, or a movie or some other form of work that is dedicated to keeping a roof over mine and my fiance's head, or keeping the lights on, or keeping food and drink in the fridge or keeping the tax-man at bay. When I started my online work, I had just finished college. I didn't have to pay rent as I lived with my parents, I didn't have to pay the tax-man every month. It was a different time and I've grown up. It's just a case of my viewership being big enough to have a dedicated audience and internet recognition but not big enough to have a sustainable income through it. This leaves me in a rather awkward place.

Just to clarify, this update is NOT a "I'm giving up. Thanks for all the fish!" in case you were worried.

Make no mistake, everyone. What I do online has never felt like work. There has never been a point in my 6-7 years of online content creation where I've grown sick of writing reviews, making videos, recording podcasts etc. I've loved every second of it and I will CONTINUE to love doing it, it's just a case of my life not being very accommodating at the moment. Because I naturally love doing my online work outside of my "real" work, it's never felt like a chore or something I've felt obligated to do. I feel like if I lived in the 70s or the 80s before the internet I probably would have wrote down the same style of reviews in a notebook for my own enjoyment or have sent my reviews to my local newspaper to try and get a job. I consider my film analysis to be THAT naturally ingrained into my personality that I'd continue doing it even if my audience was zero.

As a result, this is not a post of me announcing my retirement because I'll still endeavour to do written/video reviews, or editorials and things like that. However, it's all a matter of trying to prioritise other things.

I shouldn't specify at the moment, but I've had some serious offers to expand my script-writing work. Obviously nothing is ever a done-deal, but when I've got people deep in the industry telling me "Please send scripts in" or "Get in touch with me with a story idea!" then that's a promising sign for me, but for my reviews/viewers/listeners it may be frustrating, especially since they don't see any of that process. This personal-career progress is tangible to me, but it isn't for you so I can understand why you think there's no movement on any front and that I'm just being lazy. But after I've finished a 12-14 hour shift at work and I've got an hour or two before I go to bed to write something, what am I going to write? The long overdue review of 'La La Land', my next Editorial or....that TV script that needs polishing and industry people are actively asking for with a deadline?

I hope you folks understand why I would choose the latter. I get if you're annoyed or frustrated that I'd choose the latter, but I at least hope you understand the thought-process.

As for doing work in the weekends, that sounds ideal but grown-up stuff needs to be done (not dirty). I need to keep my flat clean, go shopping, sort out taxes, get my clothes washed, look after family members (one of which requires frequent interaction due to mental illness which, I'm sure those who are formal or informal carers will understand how time-consuming and all-encompassing that can be) and maintain some semblance of a life outside of work. Something has got to give and, unfortunately that something is my online-work. At least for now.

So what does this mean for the near future? Well, work will always continue because I'd be doing this regardless of whether or not I got paid for it. But content may now become more of a trickle as time goes on. As has always been the case for 6-7 years, the content does not ever stop (in the past 7 years I've only had 1 week of vacation-time where I've done zero work), it may just be slower than normal. This is not me announcing a retirement nor am I announcing a hiatus. This post is more just me getting everything out there, letting you all know what is happening with me and explaining myself. I apologise if I've let any of you folks down, but it was that fear of letting you down which was why I didn't explain myself sooner so it's self-perpetuating and not helping anyone.

Thank you for your patience, thank you for support and while I will be writing a post one day announcing that I'm packing it all in, this is not that post and you'll be hearing from me soon.

From,
William "Trilbee" Carlisle