The Nature of Predators - Why the Caged Bird Sings (2/11)

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Memory Transcription Subject: Cala, Krakotl Child Prisoner

Date [standardized human time]: July 3, 2137

The cards kept me occupied after Andrew had left, and that bluish-black color was all I could see through the tiny window slit on the far wall. The nighttime was always extra cold, with less predator guards around to break up the drafts. I became very sleepy, and laid down on the uncomfortable, metal bed; everything was metal, probably because humans didn’t want me to be comfortable or didn’t like decorations. Was this what Andy’s lair was like? Where did he go home to, and how different was it from this cattle pen? I was shivering from head-to-talon, clutching at the sheet of burlap for a shred of warmth. It was a relief to fall asleep, and not feel icy and homesick.

I felt something soft and gentle brush against my wing, a wonderful warmth that felt like when Mama used to hold me close; she was as warm as exterminator fire. It was easy to sleep like that, and to feel safe. I blinked my eyes open to see that Andy had returned, meaning it was early morning again. The human was stalking forward in the quiet way predators did while hunting prey, which might’ve meant he wanted to eat me…but he seemed to be draping a nice blanket over my body. I pulled it tighter around my feathers, soaking in warmth with happy chirps. The hunter’s lips curved upward, and he retrieved a small box of objects from outside the cell. I did tell him I was cold yesterday, but why had he brought things to make me happy?

I’m glad I talked to Andrew instead of being alone forever. He didn’t seem mad. He’s actually kind of…nice, and I didn’t think predators were supposed to be nice. Mama says they are “cruel” and “vicious” from eating prey, just like the Arxur.

“Thank you, Andy,” I told the beast earnestly, not sure what the exterminators would do now. They never taught me what to do if I became cattle. “You don’t seem like an Ark-sur.”

Andrew arched his eye fur. “Hard word to pronounce?”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I’m not smart! I can learn to say it better.”

A deep rumbling sound passed through his chest, making me sit up cautiously. “I know, Cala. I thought I could…teach you some things. A little reading and writing in our language, so you can have more books and fun stuff. Do you want that?”

“Yes! I love books. We had these little pop-up ones where you could move the Krakotl across the page, like they were really flying in the sky!”

“That sounds cool. Maybe we could find something like that. Actually, I brought you a different type of book that you can use right now.”

The Terran pulled out a box with many colors on the outside, and retrieved an odd book. Andrew seemed content that I approached him, when I took it from his hands. I flipped through the pages, not understanding what this was; it had some black-and-white drawings, like the sketches I’d made when I was bored during grade school. It felt weird seeing predator art, since Mama never mentioned they could do that; maybe Andy was trying to show me drawings he liked, and they didn’t have fancier art like the watercolor paintings Papa used to make on his day off from work. Some of the drawings had predator animals; I lingered on a fluffy, striped one with big fangs and forward-facing eyes for a while. If there were things that scary on Earth, could even humans protect me?

I tapped the page with a wingtip. “Predator.”

“Yes. That’s a tiger, Cala,” Andrew agreed. “There’s lots of different types of animals in this book. We aren’t the only life on Earth.”

“We wouldn’t have creatures like that on Nishtal. But why do you have these animals drawn like this?”

“It’s a coloring book. I brought it for you to have something to do; these colored pencils should give you everything you need to fill it all in, however your heart desires.”

Andrew opened the colorful cardboard box, revealing the entire rainbow’s worth of drawing sticks. I hopped around in a circle, wings fluttering and beak pointing happily at the ceiling. It would be so fun to fix the tiger sketch, and to paint in all of the others! It didn’t make much sense why he brought something for me to scribble in, but I’d been so bored in this awful place; I didn’t care. I threw the coloring book on the bed, and the human’s rumbling noise continued as I emptied the carton of writing utensils. The orange one was what I was looking for, and I used it, along with the blue and gray ones, to create a better scene. The pointed outlines of flames were traced all over the tiger’s body, before I began to draw clumsy blue birds—exterminators, with cloudlike fire coming from their guns!

I think this is a really good drawing. I hope the predator thinks I’m doing good enough, and brings me more stuff.

The Terran peered over my shoulder, and his snarl quickly faltered. “Cala…are you drawing what I think you’re drawing?”

“Mama burning the tiger?” I offered. “Oh wait. I forgot the suits! I’m sorry I messed it up.”

“Maybe the coloring book wasn’t such a good idea.” Andrew snatched the printed pages away in a heartbeat, and tears welled in my eyes; I wanted to draw more. “That isn’t what I want to teach you.”

“No! Please don’t take it away,” I wailed. “Please! Why would you bring something fun for me, just to take it away? Predators are cruel. Give it back…I don’t have anything else here. My life sucks!”

“Cala, you’re in prison, not a child daycare. You killed millions of humans, and that was what was cruel—that’s why you’re in this cell. You’re still drawing pictures of bloody predators being burned alive! Still!”

“They’re predators. That’s what’s supposed to happen to them.”

“Why?! WHY, CALA?!” Andrew roared, throwing the book at the wall; a nastier snarl had taken over his face. “We just wanted friends, and you—you decided we all had to die, to burn, to be reduced to fucking atoms, because our eyes are this way. Is that what’s supposed to happen, or are you just cruel?”

I shied away from the beast, tears pouring over my face. “I’m sorry! Please don’t hurt me. I wanna go home. Please…let me go home…”

The human’s features softened, and he sighed wearily, dusting off the book. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you. You can…have the coloring book.”

“Really? You’re not gonna roar again? You’re scary when you’re angry. It reminds me of when Papa used to lock me in the closet, because I was being too loud. At least I got let out back then. I’m never getting let out of here, am I?”

Andrew’s eyes stretched wider, and his mouth parted. “Back up. Your father…locked you in a closet?”

“Sometimes. I used to be noisy, but I’m not noisy anymore! I’m disciplined, and not a nuisance—the exterminators didn’t think I was a nuisance. I liked them better than Papa. He was only proud of me when I joined the fleet to attack here.”

“I…I’m sorry, Cala. I’m not your father. I won’t yell at you again.”

I took a tentative hop forward. “Promise?”

“Yeah. I promise. I just…I want to understand. You’d be upset if we’d come to your world, and attacked you, right?”

“That would be sad. We had to stop you before you could raid Nishtal. It’s hard to protect people, but I wanted to.”

“It’s sad. You said it. Good, hold on to that thought! I was asking an actual question before. Why are predators supposed to burn?”

“Because they eat and kill people. Instincts…they want blood and like suffering. You know what that’s like.”

“Wrong, Cala. Humans don’t know what that’s like, and that’s what I’m telling you. We have families we love, and take care of each other. Just…answer me this. If there was a predator that didn’t eat people or crave suffering, would they still deserve to burn?”

“No, but then they wouldn’t be a predator.”

“Okay. By your definition, humans aren’t predators. We’re people. That tiger there, it’s an animal trying to survive. It doesn’t have coloring books, and it definitely doesn’t have spaceships.”

“The Ark-sur had spaceships, and are bad predators.”

Andrew pressed his hands to his head. “The Arxur have done a lot of things that humans have never done to you. But if you still can’t believe I might be someone with feelings and compassion, with a civilized society that is just trying to protect our people, like you say you wanted to…what’s your fundamental idea of a predator? I assume it’s that they eat animal flesh, right?”

“Yeah. Predators eat carcasses, and prey eat…”

The human reached into his box, retrieving a yellow-orange, oblong fruit. “Plants? Like these ones I brought for a special breakfast.”

“Exactly!”

Andrew arched his eye fur, before biting into the fruit, talking as he chewed. “Then I guess the exterminators couldn’t have been right on everything they said about us, Cala.” 

Predators don’t eat plants; humans aren’t supposed to be herbivores. Mama said they hunted, but no predator would eat prey food. Everyone knows that.

I inched closer to the human, pulling the fruit right out of his paws. It was unmistakably a juicy prey treat, not a disguised carcass that was some kind of trick! Mama told me that the Terrans were uncontrollable rage monsters, but the guard had controlled his anger with the coloring incident better than Papa. The guild’s pamphlet had to be wrong about humans eating people, between Andy not hunting me and snacking on fruit. That suggested, with how school said their eyes were a predator’s searching, prowling threats…Andrew claimed yesterday that we killed a billion humans for their eyes. Maybe their binocular vision had tricked the exterminators, but that meant it’d tricked me too.

“I…killed prey,” I whimpered, feeling a deep-rooted upsetness and shame stir in my chest. “I killed prey! I didn’t mean to. You don’t eat people; you didn’t hurt us. Burning humans: it was a mistake! I thought…Karlem, and Mama, and Papa…no. I killed prey. I…should burn. I should burn!”

I screeched as a blinding-hot stream of tears flowed from my eyes, and I began ripping pages out of the coloring book. Andrew pulled me back, stopping me from destroying his gift. His hand patted the top of my head, as several times on repeat, he whispered, “It’s okay.” I cried into the human’s torso fabric, and felt the shaky rise-and-fall of his chest. No wonder the Terrans were tamer than expected, if they weren’t predators. Exterminators weren’t supposed to kill creatures that ate plants! I just wanted to be a good exterminator; I’d listened to Karlem’s orders, and believed…remembered everything they taught me. It was my fault that Andrew was sad, because I burned his brother. Why had we killed so many of them?

I’m gonna stay locked up forever, and I deserve it. I don’t want any more toys. He shouldn’t talk to me, or be nice. 

Andrew ran a hand down my neck, smoothing over my feathers. “Listen, Cala. The...mistake the Krakotl made did cost a lot of humans their lives, but you are a child. The adults are the ones who have brains that are fully developed, and enough experience to make decisions. You were involved in it, but you're not the reason they died. That was Kalsim, Karlem, and others like them. They had you kill for them, when you can’t understand. Please, don’t blame yourself.”

“I pushed the button. I wanted to help them,” I sobbed.

“I know you did. It’s okay. You just need to accept that you did a bad thing, Cala, and that those exterminators do lots of bad things too. You don’t want to grow up to kill…innocent animals like they do, when it’s your choice. I believe you are smart, and that you can do better.”

“How? There’s nothing I can do to fix this. I’m locked up here forever.”

Andrew drew a shuddering breath. “I was thinking I could petition the UN for clemency; you were quite literally incapable of understanding the consequences of your actions. It’s not too late for you. I know it’s hard to accept that the people you looked up to and care about were telling lies, but the truth is, they were. You have to throw out everything they taught you.”

“Everything? Including what Mama…”

“Especially what Mama taught you. She was probably lied to a long time ago too, and never got away from it. The exterminators claim to hate violence and death, then create that very thing. As far as predators go, they kill that which they don’t understand.”

“I want to understand. I want to be better. Can you teach me?”

The human’s lips curved up, and he pointed his eyes directly at me. “Of course I can. I’ll show you how everything serves a purpose in nature, how creatures evolve to very specific niches, and how the circle of life goes. I’ll teach you the real spectrum of diets, since it’s deeper than predator-or-prey. Herbivores aren’t just weak and powerless, trust me.”

“Then why are the grown-ups at home so afraid? We can’t fight.”

“You were taught to be that way, and taught that it was hopeless to attempt anything else. I think you should try a different way, Cala. Can you try to give what I’m telling you a chance?“

“Yes! I’ll listen to you, as good as I listened to Karlem. I wanna be smart and brave…and protect people.”

“That’s very good. Now, I did bring you a special breakfast; a little birdie told me Krakotl love mangoes. That’s the fruit I was eating earlier. Would you like a mango?”

I held out my wings, and watched as the alien placed a fruit into my grasp. Opening my beak wide, I tore into the mango, which was bursting with tropical, sweet flavor; it was much better than the food that was normally brought to me. Sticky juice dropped from my beak and coated my wings, as I hurried through Andrew’s offering. It reminded me of the fresh plants from the local marshes, singing with flavor and tang! I wanted to pretend that I was still home, eating breakfast with Mama—that I wasn’t a bad, cruel killer. Burying that painful thought, I tried to escape into the flavors. Andrew did something nice by bringing what would probably be my favorite food, compared to the other plants I’d sampled here. The human flashed his teeth as I showed him my empty graspers, and parted them once more to ask for another.

“Well, okay,” he said, depositing another mango into my arms. “Slow down a little though. I don’t want you to make yourself sick.”

I nibbled at the second fruit, leaning against the crouched human’s leg for support. “These are so good! I love mangoes. You’re really nice, Andy.”

“I’m glad you think so. After you finish that, why don’t we try coloring together? Without any fire.”

“Okay. No fire. But what about the…lessons, for me to be better?”

“That can wait until tomorrow. You’ve been robbed of enough of your childhood, Cala. I want you to have one good day.”

Andrew picked up a blue pencil from the ground, and made a goofy face at me. I finished the last of my mango with haste, and watched as the human acted like he was shoving the colored pencil up his nose; I couldn’t help but giggle at the not-predator, and he returned his own rumbling sounds of seeming amusement. It was nice to see that he was a bit happier, especially since it was my fault that he was sad. Maybe if he was in better spirits around me, that would mean that I’d help him hurt less. After staring at the silly human for several more seconds, and watching him retract the drawing stick, I decided he definitely wasn’t something vicious. It would be fun to color with him; it could be like the watercolors I’d always wanted to do alongside Papa.

Andrew was a nicer father than Papa, anyway, when I thought about it. He let me have fun and didn’t leave me to feel alone; I hoped he wouldn’t stop talking to me. I wasn’t sure I deserved whatever this clem-en-cee word meant, but I wanted to show the humans—especially this human—how sorry I was.

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A/N - Part 2! Andrew brings blankets and coloring books for Cala, but is livid when the child begins drawing fire and exterminators around a tiger. We learn a bit more about how cruel her father was, locking her in closets, yelling at her, and get angry at her for being “too noisy.” The human shows her that he can eat fruit by munching on one of the mangoes he brought her, and our narrator finally understands that she did a bad thing by bombing Earth. Andy promises to teach her the truth, if she’s willing to learn and shed the exterminators’ teachings.

What do you think of Cala’s childhood, as well as her reaction to believing that she killed prey? Do you think she’ll be able to learn from Andy’s lessons?

As always, thank you for reading and supporting!