The Nature of Predators - Why the Caged Bird Sings (9/11)

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Memory Transcription Subject: Cala, Krakotl Child 

Date [standardized human time]: September 17, 2137

Human Papa had told me about an announcement that Zhao made after meeting me. He brought up some “motion” at the United Nations general assembly to pardon all child soldiers; I didn’t understand why he was so willing to forgive kids who did bad things, just the same as all of the other crew. Andy thought that’d been inspired by meeting me, especially after the Secretary-General told a story that sounded a lot like my own. Most people on the television were very sympathetic, though we’d seen a few people on the streets who would yell and approach us. Papa told me they were dangerous and sad, like he had been after losing James, and to fly away if anyone got aggressive. I didn’t like leaving him to take care of himself, but I listened.

I noticed that Andy had a picture on his wall of him and a human that looked related, which I assumed was James. My chest felt really heavy after putting a face to his brother’s name, and remembering that I’d pushed the button that made him dead. Zhao issuing blanket pardons for me, and for everyone else my age, felt wrong. Maybe I belonged in the cell, and Andy’s mother was right that he shouldn’t have taken me in. He could’ve been helping a human kid, one that wasn’t super different from him the way the Secretary-General had said I was. The thoughts were really weighing on me since I’d be going to school today, and I couldn’t fly away from the judgment. The other kids might hate me. What if I didn’t have any friends?

Or what if they try to hang out with me, but I can’t because they have a dog that might eat me? Or I don’t know some stuff that all humans do, and then I’m not cool?

Andy ushered me down the sidewalk, checking that all my school books were loaded onto my holopad. “Something wrong, Cala? You seem awfully quiet.”

“I don’t know if I’ll fit in with the other kids. I have no idea what human children do for fun,” I despaired. “It’s obviously not what Mama said about you guys hunting and killing for laughs, and that being all you do. I know about cartoons and coloring books, but what else is there? What toys do you have? I can’t talk about my toy flamethrower…and painting might be a Krakotl thing.”

“Painting is definitely not a Krakotl thing. You can figure out who likes art and music in those classes; there’ll be fun stuff you can do with other kids, like that! You’ll be fine. Just play and talk to the others, and it almost certainly won’t be that hard.”

“What if they hate me? Like your mother?”

“Children aren’t nearly as sour as adults, and if they are, it’s because they learned it from their parents—like yours taught you all of the exterminator propaganda. They’re young enough that you can educate them, at worst.”

“I have no idea how to do that; I don’t know everything like you do!”

“I definitely don’t know everything. It’s more that the exterminators were obviously wrong, and I’ve tried to point it out in a way you can understand.” 

“But I don’t know how to make my classmates understand, and they’re not obviously wrong. I’m not sure Zhao should’ve let me go. Why should I be playing and learning when human kids are dead because of me? Even now, I’m taking their home away by staying with you.”

“Cala! I told you I didn’t want to hear you talk like that. I wouldn’t have taken in a human child; you were special, and helped me. Do you understand?”

“Yes, but…I feel bad. I’ve never talked to other humans, and I’m not sure that I’m even up for these classes. I haven’t been to school in years. The teachers might think I’m not smart enough.”

“Hey, stop stressing yourself out. I know you like learning, and that you can do so extremely fast. You’re bright, eager, and we’ve already worked to get you up to speed. You did great in our lessons, and you won’t be in trouble for making mistakes. Whatever pace you learn at, that’s okay. If it’s ever overwhelming or the teachers aren’t enough, I’ll be here to help when you get home.”

“Promise?”

“I promise. Now get going: if you want to make a good impression with the teachers, you don’t want to be late on your first day.”

“Okay.” I threw my wings around Andy, really not wanting to go into the building. “Bye, Papa.”

“Bye, Cala. I’m just a text away; remember that.”

My legs felt really heavy as I hopped up to the school. The human kids were standing by lockers and chatting, but stared at me once someone pointed a finger at me. They were way bigger than me, and I could hear all the whispering and the gossip—slowly getting louder from a few unhappier people. I wanted to go home, or even back to my cell; this was awful, feeling all of their judgment and their eyes pointed at me. Maybe this was why the Federation hated their binocular vision. I cowered, pointing my beak at the ground…and running straight into a Terran’s leg. The lunchbox clattered out of my grip, and I fell to the ground, seeing stars. My head stung, but even worse, I was embarrassed. 

I could see the remnants of the sandwich Andy had packed for me, lying on the ground. The lunchbox had popped open when I dropped it; now, not only was I an idiot, but I had no food. I didn’t want to text Papa and tell him I wasted it, since that might make him not give me lunch in the future. Old Papa would’ve said if I couldn’t be careful with my things, I didn’t deserve them. The human I’d run into crouched next to me, as tears spilled from my eyes. He was looking at me with surprise and confusion in his green irises, though I didn’t know exactly what he was taken off guard by. Was it that I was a Krakotl? That I ran into him? Since I wasn’t watching where I was going, I’d understand if he screamed at me.

“I’m sorry,” I croaked, staring at my ruined lunch with misery. “I didn’t mean to run into you.”

The Terran’s reddish eyebrows furrowed. “It’s okay. Are you hurt? I can take you to the school nurse.”

“I’m…fine,” I groaned, cleaning up the pieces of my lunch as shame burned my feathers. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“No, you startled me more than anything.” The human crouched, before helping me scoop up my splattered sandwich with his slim hands. “I’m Harry. What’s your name?”

“Cala. I just…wanted to get to class. There’s too many people staring.”

“Where are you trying to go?”

“Math with Ms. Bailey.”

“Me too. Let’s walk together, alright?”

I nodded. “Okay.”

The human shouldered a bag on his back that reminded me of a turtle shell. “Hey, I’m sorry to ask, but you’re…a real alien. You’re the bird people that attacked us, right? Don’t you hate us?”

“The Krakotl hate you, not me personally. I think you should be given a chance, and that predators aren’t bad for the environment. Humans feel stuff and can be nice; I know all that. I just want to be friends, but I’m…”

“Not able to change the species you are? A lot of my people have been feeling that with the Federation. It was a crazy year, you know. So much happened and changed, and I think it’s the first time I saw the grown-ups scared. My dad sat me down during the bombs, eyes moist, and told me that if this was the end, he wanted me to know he loved me and was proud of me.”

“I’d like to meet your father. I didn’t know dads…could be like that. Mine wasn’t proud of me ever; he told me I was a mistake and a failure all the time,” I sniffled. “But it was the first time Mama and Papa seemed scared too, when they heard about humans. They said you were going to conquer Nishtal and kill us all. They made me…”

Harry’s fingers tightened around his spine-bag strap. “That’s awful. They made you what?”

“Join…join the extermination fleet. I’m sorry for what they did to you. I didn’t have a choice; those Krakotl yelled at me a lot too, and…”

The human’s face had gotten much more shocked than when I bumped into him, with his jaw parting into a circle shape and his eyes going wide. I bowed my head in shame. Harry would hate me because of what I’d done, and that was what I deserved. Krakotl killers didn’t get to have friends at school. Also, why did I have to be so awful as to feel jealous of him, because I wished I had his Papa? There was no reason I should feel envy when I had Andy, who was way nicer to me than I deserved; I never had to see my old Papa again. It didn’t make sense to wish that the dad I was born with was like that, but I did anyway. Harry’s dad was scared because of what I helped with, and just like a lot of other Terrans, they could’ve died. They might’ve lost people they cared about.

I should text Andy, and tell him I want to go home. I want to go home and NEVER come out.

“Your parents forced you into the military? You must be my age, if we’re in the same classes,” the human breathed. “Who would do that? I can’t imagine doing something like that.”

I reluctantly looked at him, studying his facial cues. “It’s my fault. They said they were protecting Nishtal, and I wanted to be old enough to help. It made Papa proud, for once. I made him proud by helping to kill innocent people, and that was so wrong; I did a horrible thing. I get why humans don’t want to be friends with me.”

“I really don’t know what to say to that. But I think it’s horrible that the Krakotl forced you into the military, and made you kill people. No parent should’ve ever let you do that. It’s monstrous. They’re supposed to keep you safe.”

“You…don’t blame me?”

“No. While I’ve been playing video games and messing around with toy cars, you got sent to fight a bunch of aliens and told your planet would die if you didn’t. That sucks, Cala. I was going to ask what it was like growing up on another world, but now, I’m glad I live on this one.”

“I’m happy I live on Earth now too. It’s a lot better than my old life. I’d like to try these ‘video games’ and ‘toy cars.’”

Harry’s face brightened. “You could come over to my place. I can show you…and I’m sure my parents would be happy I had anybody to hang out with. Honestly, I should warn you: nobody wants to sit at my lunch table, or hang out after school, since I won the math competition. They think I’m a loser. If you want friends, like you said earlier, you might not want to be around me.”

“Why would I care that you like math? That just means you could help me not fail and be a disappointment. I’ll sit with you at lunch.”

“Great! Um, my sandwich isn’t vegetarian, but I’d be happy to share my potato chips, since you need something to eat. Not to sound desperate, but er, is that a ‘no’ to coming over? It’s okay if you can’t, just asking!”

“That sounds fun, but I have to ask Andy before I say yes: he’s my adopted dad. I also have to ask if you have any dogs or cats. Andy says they could eat me.”

Harry scratched the back of his head. “Yeah, we have two Rottweilers. Big dogs. I didn’t think about it, but…they’re super nice, really.”

“To humans. Andy says they wouldn’t have evolved to not attack me, the way they did with you.”

 “Oh. Uh, we can think of somewhere else to go. I could just go home and get my stuff, and figure something out?”

“No, Andy said I have to figure out how to interact with dogs. Do you think it’s safe?”

“I can keep you safe, and my parents will be there too. Bella and Milo are well-trained; we’ve never had any problems with them.”

“Okay. If you say it’s fine, I’ll trust you.”

Harry flashed his teeth, before opening the door to the classroom for me. Every head turned in my direction, as my new friend found two desks next to each other near the back corner. At least I had someone nice to sit beside, and a wall on the other side. However, there was one row behind me, and I could hear that human crinkling paper really loudly. Something hit me on the head, before there was a soft thud; a wadded-up paper ball fell onto the floor, just as I whipped around. I figured out that the Terran back there had thrown it at me, which wasn’t hard to miss since he was snickering about it. He turned to the kid on his left, and the two slapped open palms like some kind of celebration. Why was it funny or cool to hit me? Because I did bad things, and they already knew about it?

I can’t throw the way humans can, or else I’d pick it up and throw it back at him.

“Oscar, did I see you throw a paper ball at our new student?” A stern woman with glass lenses in front of her eyes spoke in an icy voice; I assumed this was Ms. Bailey. “Stand up, and apologize.”

Oscar snorted. “I’m not apologizing to a Krakotl. They should apologize to us, forever, for what they did. The bird’s lucky it’s just a paper ball; it’s a lot nicer than what they threw at us.”

“You cannot be serious. The Krakotl is nine years old. Do you think children were the ones who personally stood around and decided to attack Earth? If we attacked another planet today, should that be your fault?”

Oscar clamped his mouth shut, clearly seething, as I wished that I could disappeared into my desk.

“That’s what I thought,” Ms. Bailey continued. “Apologize.”

I cleared my throat awkwardly. “No, it’s okay. Please don’t make him. He’s right. I should…be apologizing to you. I’m sorry for what happened to Earth.”

“Oscar will apologize, or he can leave my classroom. This is not how we’re going to treat our first alien student, regardless of what species you’re from.”

“Sorry,” Oscar hissed through gritted teeth; it was evident he was insincere. “There. Happy?”

Ms. Bailey adjusted her glasses. “No, but I’ll move on. Cala, most of us—myself included—have never met an alien before. Why don’t you come up here and introduce yourself?”

Alarm rocketed through my veins. “What? N-no, I don’t want to do that.”

“I insist. We’re curious, and this is the perfect chance to get to know you.”

Feeling trapped, I inched up to the front of the classroom with slow, unwilling steps. I could still feel every eye on me, just like out in the hallway, and Oscar wasn’t the only one who looked scornful. Harry’s expression was encouraging, and a bit pitying. I turned my head toward the teacher, as if trying to prompt her to tell me what to say. Maybe she was bullying me, and I could convince her with empathy to let me out of this. I didn’t want to talk in front of all these humans; I wouldn’t have wanted to do this even if this was a room full of Krakotl, who didn’t have as much reason to hate me! Was it too late to call Andy, and beg him to take me home? The only reason I thought I’d try to see this through was that I had one friend, and I was looking forward to doing fun stuff that Terran children liked.

I appreciate that Ms. Bailey helped me with the bully, but why does she have to draw so much attention to me? I can’t introduce myself, when all I’ve done in my life is train for the exterminators, help attack Earth, and sit in a prison cell. Well, and go to the zoo with Andy.

“Go on, dear. What was your favorite subject back home, Cala?” the teacher prodded.

My wings quivered with nervousness. “I…think humans have different subjects? We didn’t have art or music, and if we did, it would’ve b-been that.”

“Art and music? What inspired you to take up that passion? A good teacher…a family member…some Krakotl pieces you came across and enjoyed?”

“Um, I guess it was that Papa was a painter? I wanted to be good enough to paint with him.” I wish I’d gotten Mama’s flamethrower and burned his paintings. I wish I burned him. “You know, actually, it’s because of a human. My adopted dad let me draw, paint, and sing, and showed me all sorts of arts and crafts. He made it fun.”

“That’s wonderful to hear! Art is an expression of creativity, and it seems that it transcends species. I thought to ask you what’s the biggest difference between Earth and Nishtal…”

“You don’t burn animals.”

“Er, right. That would be cruel.” The teacher looked a bit uncomfortable, and I wondered if I shouldn’t have said that. “What I was going to say was that instead, we’ve found ways we’re similar. I would love to know how our schools compare; it’s hard to tell if you’re placed in the right year.”

“I wouldn’t really know. You’re my first class, so I can’t tell you how it compares. Your desks are different. Ours had perches with raised stands. I also haven’t seen any seed dispensers for snacks here, but I haven’t explored the whole building? That’s all I can really tell right now.”

“Seed dispensers? You mean birdseed?”

“I guess? Is there something wrong with that? I know the Krakotl did a lot of stuff wrong…”

“No, of course not. Thank you very much for sharing with us, Cala. Perhaps we can look into getting a perch to accommodate you; I’ll ask around for you. For now, why don’t you take a seat? Class, open up your holoworkbooks to page 34.”

I scampered back to my seat before Ms. Bailey could change her mind, very eager to do math problems instead of getting questioned about my life. Andy hadn’t warned me that the human adults might do that. Harry leaned over from his desk, a sympathetic smile on his face, and helped me find the right workbook from my preloaded library. As awful as it was to stand in front of the class, at least everyone hadn’t hated me. There were some humans who were curious about me; it was weird to think they’d never seen an alien before, since I saw lots of them growing up. That meant that they might get used to me, or I could educate them like Andy had suggested.

I wasn’t sure whether I liked these classes or could make it through them yet, but I was hopeful that I’d survive on Earth. As long as the humans who were on my side could keep me safe, there were quite a few positive things that I still had left to experience here.

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A/N - Cala’s first day of school! Andy tries to encourage her as anxiety kicks in, but once she’s on her own, everyone is staring—and she runs right into a human student, spilling her lunch. Harry proves quite friendly and curious, and extends an offer for Cala to hang out with him during and after school, even if dogs are a concern. There was, however, an incident in the class due to our Krakotl’s presence, though the teacher stepped in then forced her to make introductions.

What do you think of how Cala was received at school, and how she’s settling in? Do you think having a human friend will give her the last bit she needs for a happy childhood?

As always, thank you for reading and supporting!