Eat Me CH18

Cinder flipped through the channels as I shortened my build time for my gauss rifle. Transfiguration worked well enough even with my oak and dragon heartstring wand. The silly stick of wood felt odd in my hand, and it tried to fight back every step of the way. Magic was something I could do but not well compared to cultivation.

“Young men refuse to work low paying jobs as more join academia to become engineers, doctors, and scientists at unprecedented rates.” She flipped to another channel. “Young male protesters turned violet when parliament failed to address the shortage of grants. Constables were called on the scene, but one of the protesters drove their sedan over the constables killing dozens.” The news reported.

“Violence in the streets, is that what you wanted?” Jim asked.

“The protest was peaceful until parliament ignored it. By ignoring their opportunity for a peaceful discussion, violence was inevitable.” I said and smiled.

“Master, was this your plan to destabilize the country?” Nimrod asked.

I smiled. “I’m striking at the very foundation of the secret world government. The Cathedral created our current world after they took power after World War II. Because they fear nuclear war, our food is drugged, children are indoctrinated, and morality is dictated by them. I took from these boys their desire for sex and gave them freedom in return. So they cannot be led astray.” I said.

Cinder fluffed up her feathers. “My father never told me there was a secret muggle cabal controlling the world.” Cinder said.

“It is a secret so obvious most don’t notice it. There isn’t a cabal as much as a religious movement to take over the world and usher in communism.” I said.

“Why should that matter to us?” Cinder asked.

“It doesn’t; we’re going to be well away from earth before they take over and inevitably eat themselves. Then, of course, they’re going to say it's our fault. We damned Martians took all their wealth and smart people; that’s why they’re stuck on earth eating dirt cookies.” I said.

Then we heard a knock at the door. Nimrod quickly opened it to reveal Tom Riddle stepping through our threshold wearing a robe of green with silver thread inlaid cuffs. Warnings flared across my spiritual sense, and my gaze narrows in on a ring heavily of the dark.

“I hope you’ve learned well under Severus you may take nothing with you save a wand. While I am a harsh taskmaster, I am not cruel. I’m certain you haven’t had enough time to even begin wand lore. Do you remember the task I assigned you?” Tom asked.

“Slay a giant in the sacred forest. It sounds easy enough.” I said.

“With your full powers at your disposal, it may well be easy. But this is a test of what you learned, and don’t confuse giants with trolls. Giants are as intelligent as wizards and twice as stubborn. Anger one, and it will hunt you until either you die, or it falls to you.” Tom said.

“I’m not worried; I’ve trained for this,” I said.

“A good answer now; take my hand, and we’ll be off,” Tom said.

In a flash of golden light, we traveled thousands of miles. When next we appeared, I stood at the base of an ancient yew larger than any tree I’ve ever seen. The tree stood tall and twisted like spun muscle fibers with long cascading branches. Each branch snaked through the canopy above green and heavy like an anaconda taller than anything I’ve ever seen. I took a step and nearly threw myself in the air.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“The trees are magical and alter their environment to help themselves grow closer to the sun. While many are sturdier than other trees, this variation lowers gravity around them. Some do the opposite and increase gravity, while others pour out more oxygen to support insects that feed on their competition. Others choose to stretch space itself to push its competition away.” Tom said.

“You told me where you were sending me and what I was doing by not why. Why should I stay here at all or use magic for anything? I can fly out of here in seconds and never look back.”  I said.

Tom grinned. “If only it were so easy. Many creatures more powerful than you have tried, only to get further lost in this place. Be careful not to use your other powers, or the wards may not let you out at all. Use magic whenever you can and always with a wand.” Tom said and glanced down at the stick clutched in my hand.

“But what’s the point of taking me here?” I asked.

“To teach you respect for magic and wizardkind. You see, this place is both a sanctuary and a prison for some of the most powerful magical beings to ever walk the earth. Despite their advantages over wizards, we still trapped them here. We mere strips of flesh who hadn’t even built wands or really organized before Rome defeated the monsters in the world.” Tom said, and for a moment, he seemed dignified.

A booming footstep rocked the ground and shook leaves above the great canopy. I moved quickly and cut off a yew branch, and began rapidly warding and transfiguring the branch. Charms were quick and dirty things, and I used them where I could while putting together my weapon of choice while the sounds of stomping feet drew closer.

“It’s your choice whether to hurry and make your weapon or hide. You have a year to bring down a giant and escape the reserve. Bagging the first one you see isn’t part of your quest. Remember, even if you kill one now, you still have to transport its body out of this reserve and back to your home.” Tom said with a smirk.

I had planned to OTK the second I heard the stomping of giant’s feet, but it appeared my plans were to be stonewalled. “Do you have any last-minute advice?” I asked.

“Try not to make enemies where you don’t have to. More than giants live in these woods.” Tom said.

In a burst of power, he vanished in the silhouette of a golden hourglass before it fell apart into motes of golden particles. The stomping came closer and hundred of charging moose charged through in a stampede. I paused in my transfiguration and cursed as the charging mob closed in on me. Standing still meant death; even if they couldn’t hurt me, my gauss rifle would be ruined.

I levitated it silently and climbed up the tree. Sure, I was cheating with my strength, but I wasn’t flying, and that’s what mattered. It’s the spirit of the quest I needed to follow, not the letter. Then, a 15-meter-tall girl with braided blonde hair, the most striking blue eyes I’ve ever seen, with a hungry look in her eyes, snatched one of the moose from the herd. She held the squealing animal in both hands, and I felt her magic flow.

Ice expanded around the animal, trapping it in a mini glacier. The girl tossed it in a basket on her side and snatched up another one. It was insane. How could these creatures not rule the world if they were that large and powerful? Some rando giant girl could freeze a fully grown bull moose cold in seconds to be thawed and eaten later. I realized on site that she had flash frozen it.

What could they do to people if they were blood lusted? That thought, more than anything, convinced me to be careful. A few giants would be more than enough to destroy a city if the size of this girl was anything to go by. She couldn’t be any older than 11 or 12.

Her blue eyes shifted at the worst time, zooming in on me. The giant girl kicked away some of the fleeing moose and squatted down to get a better look at me. All the while, I continued building the gauss rifle.

“Hey there, little guy, do you want to be my friend?” The giantess asked and held out her giant hand. While the system did translate her words, they came through in a strange dialect of old English.

I used the sound-amplifying charm. “Alright, my name is Harry; what’s yours?” I asked.

“Harry, that’s a funny name; you don’t have that much hair.” She said and pulled up my shirt. “Nope, not hairy at all. My name is Brunnera, and this is my territory. Father said so. Only my friends are allowed in my territory I’m glad we’re friends, Harry. He also said I should eat my enemies, and your tiny bones would get stuck in my teeth.” Brunnera said.

“I didn’t know giants were so territorial,” I said.

“Why are you naked?” Brunnera asked.

“My teacher tossed me in these woods to teach me more about magic. He said I could only bring my wand with me. Of course, I thought he was being edgy at first.” I said.

“Your dangly bits are so tiny I can barely see them. How do you please a woman with such small dangly bits?” Brunnera asked.

I was starting to get a little annoyed. With a swish of my wand, I conjured a leather strap for my now complete gauss rifle. But perhaps pants would have been a better plan. Of course, that wouldn’t have been the case if she wasn’t friendly but still.

“What’s that? Is it a toy? It looks like a toy.” Brunnera asked.

“It’s a dangerous weapon,” I said.

She looked a little leery at it. “It looks like a toy to me,” Brunnera said.

I pointed it at a moose and pulled the trigger. The creature’s head exploded in a shower of gore.

Brunnera gasped. “It's like a tiny bow and arrow. Can you make me one?” Brunnera asked.

I imagined giants armed with gauss rifles marching out of this forest and blasting cities to ash with rapid-fire. While I wouldn’t care if I was already safely on Mars, it wasn’t happening now.

“Maybe when you’re older,” I said.

Brunnera huffed but didn’t seem to mind; she reached down and flash froze the moose I shot. “I’m going to take you home and dress you up. Then, maybe you can meet with my pets.” Brunnera said.