Post death report

well. unfortunately, yours truly has died once more. and with this death I think it's safe to say i wont be returning anymore. even though i'd like to say that no matter how many times i get knocked down i'd always get back up, I do think I've had quite about enough. I'll still be here, uploading when the depression isn't that bad, and i'll (maybe, possibly) still stream on twitch as for youtube, im actually just done with those fuckfaces. If i somehow manage to get my account back, i promise a full return, but I do think those goobers that got my appeal probably laughed it off and just deleted the appeal. seems believable to me. While it certainly does hurt a lot for me to say goodbye, I don't have many options

. being real transparent here.

I love love love love love doing what i do. Voicing shit, pretending to be y'all lonely asses' bf (im kidding love you all <3) Its all plenty of fun. making content has been a dream of mine for almost 10 years now, and I feel truly blessed that I've been able to at least do this for a bit. Streaming is also incredibly fun, despite not having the biggest audience of all time. Even though i had always felt inferior compared to a lot of other content creators, when i had seen the relief and excitement of the people reacting to my revival, I was honestly so moved. I hadn't ever believed I'd be able to do something in my life with so many people being happy to see me work. It felt good to see people want me back. I'm very grateful to everyone who has supported me throughout this journey, no matter if you've been here for just a week or even a day, or if you've been around since the origin. An even bigger thank you to those who have supported me directly through donations and what not, means the world to me to be able to not only do what i love but also make money for it. Through all that, i've been able to fund my hobbies such as gaming, cosplay, and collecting cards. My irl life is eating mad shit and i've honestly never been in a lower point than i am now. I’ve been in uni for 2 years now and I’ve found no drive whatsoever. I’ve been unable to make any friends and most people I’ve tried talking to just ghosted, ignored or would give me single word replies n shit. I’ve watched people around me get into relationships while I can’t even rly make a friend. being amai gave me so much purpose and once again, I can't thank you all enough for that. Through Amai I’ve been able to meet so many cool ass people and slowly was able to gain more confidence as well. While goals such as reaching 100k, twitch partner, and even professionally voicing in various content has now been made almost impossible, "it is what it is", as they say.

this is all i really wanted to say for now, but if i think of anything else i'll add to the post <3