The Women's Job - Part 26

If you are curious about what happened to Karla (Connie's Story) after that, you can find out in this part.

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Jack looked the way I had anticipated he would be dejected. The look wasn't very apparent, but I was looking for it. His friend appeared to cheer up, given the slight grin on his face. I could imagine what he was thinking. If he couldn't score, at least Jack didn't either.

"Well, if you change your mind," He fished his wallet out of his back pocket and pulled out a business card. "The concert's Saturday night." He handed me his card. "Give me a call. My beeper number's there too." He added,

It was a fancy card with gold embossed lettering. I tucked it in my pocket to throw it away later. I smiled across the table as they stood up with me. "I don't think I'll be able to get away, but thanks for asking anyway."

I took some satisfaction in being on the other side of the fence. The side that did the rejecting. It was a nice change, almost fun.

"If you let me have your number, I could call, and we could do something another time?"

That I didn't expect. I didn't want him to call. I had to admit, he was persistent. "I don't usually give it out. I have your card. I'll call you." On a cold day in hell, I thought to myself.

As we walked out the door, I remembered my first encounter with men as Jennifer, what seemed so long ago. I remembered how terrified I'd been, with my palms sweating and my knees shaking. Sure, I was still nervous about meeting men, but I wasn't nearly as terrified as that first time. I thought I handled myself quite well.

"What was it he handed you?" Virginia asked as we put our golf clubs in her trunk.

"His business card."

She smiled at me, asking eagerly, "Did he ask you out."

I really had to have that talk with her. "Yes."

"That's wonderful. He's very handsome. Where's he taking you?"

Did she actually think I had accepted his invitation? I was amazed. "I told him I couldn't go, that I had to work."

"That's a shame, Honey."

A shame?

Her friends, who parked their car right next to Virginia's, prepared to leave.

"We had fun. It was very nice to meet you, Jennifer. You play a good game. We need to get together for another soon."

I smiled sweetly. "It was a pleasure meeting you too, and I'd love to play with you again. I enjoyed it." I did enjoy the game.

When Virginia and I got in the car, I continued the earlier conversation. "Aunt Virginia, I don't really have to work next weekend. I just didn't want to go out with him."

She looked at me, puzzled, for an instant. "Well, you'll meet someone nice that you like. You just need to be patient, Honey. The right man will come along."

She thought she understood. She didn't. Virginia was too much. I didn't want to get into it then and there. I was too tired from walking eighteen holes.

It was almost six when we got back to her house.

"May I ask you a favor?" I asked across the table.

"What is it, Honey?"

My thoughts went back to the hot rollers upstairs. My curiosity was peaked. I was anxious to try them. "Would you show me how to use the rollers in the bedroom?" I knew how to roll my hair in them, but I had no idea what combination of the different sizes to use or how to arrange them in my hair.

"I'd be happy to, Honey." She was thrilled that I asked for her help. "Right after dinner."

It didn't take us any time to clean up. I needed a shower; besides, Virginia said they worked best when your hair was wet.

Among the clothes in the closet was a pink nylon robe. It wasn't any shorter than mine at home, but it was much nicer. I recognized the Liz Clayborn emblem embossed on the front. Wearing only clean panties, I slipped it on and sat at the vanity table where we plugged in the rollers to heat up.

"Can you make my hair look like hers?" I asked, showing Virginia the picture I had been carrying around in my purse for several days. I had seen it in one of Connie's magazines and had cut it out.

The girl with bangs, like I had now, had a head full of soft curls. Her hair was slightly longer than mine, down to her breasts, but I hoped mine was long enough. My hair seemed to grow fast, and I hoped it wouldn't take too long for it to grow to that length.

"I think we can do that." Virginia agreed.

I watched closely as she separated my hair just so and wound it on the hot rollers.

"There are lots of hairstyling magazines that would show you how to do this and give you hints on different styles for your hair."

"I've seen them on the magazine racks." I just never picked one up to look at. Guys don't pick up that kind of magazine, much less buy them. There was no reason I shouldn't now. I would get some the next time Connie and I went food shopping.

"Are rollers like these very expensive?" I asked as she continued to set my hair.

"Just take these home with you. I bought them for you."

"I wouldn't feel right taking them."

"Nonsense. They're yours, just like your clothes in the closet." She reminded me. "All I ask is that you leave a few things here to wear for when we decide to go out, and you need a change of clothes."

It was all mine. To do with as I pleased? It didn't seem right somehow, the idea of taking the clothes home with me.

Not that I didn't want to. Virginia had exquisite taste in clothes, and she bought only the best labels. Most girls would envy my wardrobe, and it was growing all the time. I was really pretty lucky. I remember thinking to myself.

"There, all done." She finished putting in the last roller. "I think that's going to look just wonderful."

"How long do I need to leave them in?" I had no idea.

"Well, you could use your hair drier, and we could take them out in about a half-hour or just leave them on overnight and take them out in the morning."

"I have a hair drier?" I hadn't seen one.

"It's right here." She went to my closet and took the box off the shelf. I hadn't even noticed it there. I had been too busy looking at the clothes below.

"Let's get you set up." She took it out of the box.

I sat there at the dressing table while my hair dried. Virginia brought me a magazine to read and left me alone. We couldn't talk very well over the noise it made.

I remember thinking what a weekend it had been. Getting my hair done, shopping and finding all the clothes I bought. Then discovering everything Virginia had brought me.

I had been disappointed about Christy, and I was still hurt, but Connie had helped me put some of that hurt aside. I really enjoyed dinner and the play with Connie and Virginia. I thought about the woman at the play wearing their beautiful dresses, and again my curiosity was piqued about how I might look wearing an evening gown.

I was a little nervous at church, but the way Virginia's friends accepted me put me at ease. I even got a kick out of the looks from the women's husbands. The white dress I wore was so pretty and feminine. It was almost a shame that it was too dressy for work. I could just imagine how my friends would react to seeing me in it.

Playing golf was fun. Being flirted with, now that it was over, had been fun too, in a way. I remembered Jack's business card in the pocket of my shorts over on the bed. Maybe I would just keep it, just for fun. To remind me of the experience.

"You should be dry by now," Virginia said, coming up from behind me. I hadn't heard her come in over the noise of the hair drier. She had showered and changed.

My hair looked so strange when she took the rollers out, before she brushed it out. Again, I paid close attention to the way Virginia styled it. She showed me how to give it volume and get it to lay just so. I was delighted with the way it took shape.

It wasn't exactly like the picture, but close. My hair did need to get a little longer, but it looked great anyway.

"I love it," I said, looking in the mirror, turning my head this way and that. Big full waves cascaded down from the top of my head to below my shoulder. My bangs were pulled off to one side. The words sensual and sexy had never crept into my vocabulary until that moment.

"It's stunning, Jennifer. You have beautiful thick hair. I still can't get over how pretty it looks with the highlights."

I was more than satisfied. "Do you think I could do this myself in the morning?"

"I'm sure you could, but it would be easier if you go to bed with it set." She told me. "You can pick up some inexpensive plastic rollers or, better yet, some of those soft foam ones. They're much easier to sleep in."

I wondered what it was like to sleep in rollers? It had to be uncomfortable. "Do you sleep in rollers?" Virginia had beautiful curly hair.

"Sometimes."

If she could do it, I could get used to it. I would give it a try, but not tonight, I told myself.

"I should really get home." It was after nine. I was anxious to see Connie and have her know what I did with my hair. The other reason I wanted to get home early was that I hadn’t forgotten Connie’s look when she left the night before, and I wanted to have some time with her before we had to go to bed.

"You should wear one of your new dresses home. This peach one would look gorgeous with your hair that way."

The peach dress was sleeveless with a softly scooped low neckline that let my hair lay against my skin. Its skirt was long, longer than any dress I had worn, almost to my calves. It was full and flowing. With my hair styled the way it was, it gave me a soft feminine look that I liked. Who could possibly mistake me for a man?

There were peach pumps to match. I wore my pearls, but we both agreed that the dress would have looked better with gold. I wondered what Virginia was thinking and was anxious to see what jewelry she would buy me next.

There were so many new experiences I was learning to enjoy.

I was packing up to go, putting my shorts, top, and socks in a bag to carry it home. My outfit that I wore there Saturday night was already on hangers and ready to go.

"Would it be alright if I take the white dress to show Connie?" I asked.

"Of course, Honey. I told you. They're your things to do with what you wish." Virginia fetched it from the closet. She didn't let me leave without putting the curlers in my bag too.

You be careful driving home and lock your doors. It's not safe for a girl your age to be out alone. Not even in her car." She told me at the front door.

As Jeffrey, that was something I never bothered to worry about. I was only learning to adjust my thinking. It wasn't safe for a girl alone to be out so late. For an instant, I imagined what a rapist's reaction would be after accosting me. Then I thought I wasn't as strong as I used to be. It could be a very unpleasant, if not dangerous, experience. I felt a new level of empathy for women. I locked the car door after sliding into the front seat.

But after that, Connie called me and we went to a brand new restaurant. Where I received a pleasant greeting from Karl, the valet, and the doormen, Lester. The looks that accompanied their greetings reinforced my excitement over how good I looked.

Don't no but Connie told me to stay and then looking closely at Karl.

"Karla, it that you?" He looked very shameful looking back at Connie. I think they may be the same age maybe he was her friend she told me stories of what was her name 'Karla,' Karl, Karla I am confused.

"Ya Connie its me Karla,"

"What happened to you, Karla? Why are you looking like this? Back to Karl again,"

"What can I say," then there was a long pause.

"Tell me everything, darling,"

"You know what happened to my dad, after your family shifted to the different part of states, here my world started turning upside down, we lost everything we own, my dad who was a great businessman, lost all his interest in doing business and then we had a big loss losing all our savings, property and house."

"Ya didn't you call me Karla,"

"For god sake, Connie, please don't call me Karla; because of your fucking tapes, I am suffering this now,"

"With me, your mom was also there,"

"Fuck her too; after we lost all our money, mom said she don't want to live like a lesbian couple with dad. And then she went away got herself other men who can satisfy her. Due to all these heartbreaking changes in our life, my dad died due to heart failure. The priest who was conducting dad's funeral told me that there was some dark power behind this. I was very confused, and then my body started going back to been a guy again like it was some kind of magic indeed priest was right. Days passed by doing small jobs, don't know what to do with my feeling like a girl, It was hard, but I decided to forget all these girl feelings, forget that I was Karla started my new life again as a Karl and now this is I am."

"Oh my god, Karl, all these things you told me, it's all my fault, what can I do for you, anything you want, just anything, I must be punished for all this."

"One thing you can do, just go out of my life and don't come back. I just don't what to see your face again in my life. It reminds me of me being Karla that I just what to forget, just fuck and go."

We were standing there for few minutes. Connie was crying. I don't know who's fault was this, so I decided to stay quiet. There was Karl again in his casual clothes.

"Hey Connie, I am sorry, it was not your fault, maybe someone was controlling our minds with black magic, like how my body changed, and back again, I just want to totally forget the past, now I going some other part of the states, where you will never ever find me, it that I want that way, Hey Connie I forgive you,"

"Hey Karl, don't go. I can help you,"

"Not this time Connie."

Then there was silence, and suddenly Karl hugged Connie.

"This is the last time you will see me."

Then he went forever. Connie was standing there, told me to go back.

"You just go back, I will come after,"

"Okay, Connie, Please come back early."

Maybe she was upset, perhaps she needs some time alone, I did what she told.

When I arrived home, there was a message for me, though. Christy called around six, looking for me. She wanted me to call if I didn't get in too late. I decided not to call her. After what she did to me, I thought I'd just let her wonder where I was.

It was ten o'clock, and Connie wasn't home yet. I was a little worried about her.

I felt a little funny, sitting there in my pretty dress in my heels with my hair looking prettier than I ever remembered hers looking. In fact, when I thought about it, overall, I looked prettier than she did. What would she say if shekarla could see me?

I almost hung up the phone after dialing her. "Hi, Tina."

She told me about her week, and I told her about mine. It was getting difficult to have that kind of conversation with her. I had to twist around and change my recount of the week so much.

She sounded so lonely. "I miss you so much."

Did I miss her the same way? "I miss you too, Tina."

"I was talking to my folks, and they thought it would be all right if I came down to visit since you have so much trouble getting time off to come up."

That came as a shock. "I don't know if now's a good time, Tina." I tried not to sound panicked, but I wasn't very successful, given her reaction.

"Why not!?" She asked with concern. "What's wrong?"

I took a deep breath to calm myself. "Nothing's wrong. It's just not a good time. I'm constantly working, and I wouldn't have much time for you."

"You're working nights and weekends?" She asked, sounding a little peeved.

"Just about." I lied.

"Did you work this weekend, today?"

"All day. I got in about eight."

"Who works with you?" She asked.

This was the jealous side of Tina that I knew. She had no reason to be jealous in the past, but that hadn't stopped her when I made plans that didn't include her. "There's a couple of us that work the photoshoots, and the models, of course."

I could have kicked myself for saying that. I had been downplaying that I worked with models because I knew she didn't like that. I screwed up and mentioned them at the worst possible moment.

"Jeffrey, are you seeing someone down there?" Tina had a habit of being direct.

"No!" I insisted. Considering the way Christy was treating me, it wasn't really a lie. That was nonsense. Of course, I was cheating on Tina, and I felt like dirt because of it. On the other hand, if Tina were to walk in and see me, see how I had changed, she would turn right around and walk out on me.

"What about the models?" She asked.

"Honest Tina, I'm not seeing anyone." What would she have said if I told her two guys were coming on to me that day and one asked me out? "I've been asked, but I've said no."

She seemed to calm down a little. "Well, you better not. I'd be down there so fast your head would spin."

"I believe you." It probably wasn't a good time to suggest that maybe we should start seeing other people, as I had planned to tell her the next time we talked.

I had no plans on going back north to live and work. I couldn't even imagine making a trip up to visit. How could I? No, my life was in Atlanta now, or at least till I found a cure for my problem.

"Well, if I don't come down, then I expect you to come up for your birthday." She insisted.

My birthday was only a little over a month away. I had to tell her something, or she'd be down for sure. "I'll be there, I promise."

"You better. I really miss you, Jeffrey." She said again.

"I miss you too. I'll talk to you next week. Take care of yourself."

"I love you!" Her tone was familiar. She expected a reply.

"I love you too." I couldn't muster the same enthusiasm, but I tried to sound convincing.

A lot of the exhilaration I had felt that weekend left me after talking to Tina. I went into my bedroom and started cutting off tags and putting my new things away. I waited and waited for Connie.

I watched the eleven o'clock news. I didn’t even take off my shoes for fear she'd walk in any moment. As the news went off, I finally turned off the TV. I was ready to give up and go to bed. My finger was on the light switch when I heard the key in the lock. I turned as the front door opened and rushed toward the foyer to greet her. I found there, to my surprise, a man holding Connie in his arms, kissing her.

I felt so embarrassed. They both turned at the sound of my approach. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean,"

"Hi, Sweetheart," Connie said over the man's shoulder.

"Hi," I answered meekly, almost calling her mom. I decided I better not, at least not in front of the man.

He was big, at least six foot two or three. He wasn't a young man. He had to be at least fifty, but he looked to be in great shape for his age. He had salt and pepper hair and a kind face. He could have been the president of a company with his polished appearance. He was very handsome.

"Jennifer, I would like you to meet Kevin, Kevin Donaldson."

He extended his hand to me. "It's very nice to meet you, Jennifer. Connie's told me so much about you. Actually, there's little else she talks about these days. You're certainly as beautiful as she's told me."

He was very flattering. "It's very nice to meet you too." My small hand was lost in his big paw. He had a great smile. It was the kind that made you like someone the instant you met them.

I couldn't help but notice the faint, pale ring on his ring finger when his hand closed around mine. It was unmistakable.

"I didn't mean to interrupt you two. I was just on my way to bed." I started to back off from the two.

"I was just going." He told me. Once more, he kissed Connie. Not as passionately, but with tenderness, barely brushing her lips. "It was wonderful." He told her, looking into her eyes.

I had never seen Connie look that way. For the first time, she was not the self-assured, always in control of the situation woman I knew. She was simply a woman who appeared to melt in the arms of a man. It was nice to see her in that light. Maybe she wants to forget about the incident that happened with Karl.

He turned back to me. "It was a pleasure, Jennifer. I hope next time we meet, we can get to know each other a little."

I began to understand what Connie found so attractive about the man. "I hope so too." His smile seemed to melt you.

With that, he was gone. "I like him," I told Connie as she just stood there at the door for a moment. My words seemed to startle her.

"So do I, so do I."

It was cute seeing her this way. So I didn't mention Karl, and does she say, anything about him.

"Let me look at you."

I was beginning to wonder if she was going to notice.

"I love that dress and your hair. Did Virginia help you do that?"

"Tonight, after dinner. We were experimenting." I was glad she liked it.

She touched my curls then the strap of my dress. "Sweetheart, you look lovely. I can't get over how much the change in your hair has done for you."

"Really?" I was thrilled that she liked it so much.

"Really!"

I remembered the dress that now hung in the closet. "I just have to show you the way that white dress looks on me."

"All right," She said with a smile. "Go put it on."

I all but ran to the bedroom. I changed quickly. Fortunately, I had a pair of white heels in the closet because I forgot the new ones at Virginia's.

"Oh my, that is lovely," Connie told me when I made an entrance into the living room. "I'll bet you got a lot of compliments from Virginia's friends at church?"

"Everyone loved it. I can't tell you how wonderful I felt wearing it." It didn't even feel odd to say that.

Connie smiled again, and there was just a touch of condescendence in her voice. "I think I can imagine."

How stupid could I be? The new experiences I'd been having, the feelings I was discovering, were feelings that Connie, like most women, discovered when they were children. At times, I must have seemed like a child to Connie and Virginia.

"I'm silly?"

"Not at all. It's only natural for you to feel that way. I'm just so glad that you're adjusting so beautifully." The condescending tone was gone from her voice, replaced with the motherly tone I found so reassuring. "Don't you think you should get ready for bed now? It's late, and we have work in the morning."

I was keyed up. "I don't think I can sleep."

I hung up and put my things away with care. After finishing in the bathroom and moisturizing, I went straight to the dresser drawer that held the nighties Connie and Virginia bought me. I found the one I was looking for under the white pajamas. It was red and delicately trimmed in lace on the neckline, hem, and narrow straps, just like the one I left at Virginia's.

I found a clean pair of red panties in the other drawer and put them on. I really like the way it looked on me in my mirror. It made me feel much the way the beige dress did when I wore it, soft and feminine. I was beginning to savor the feeling.

I sat on the edge of my bed, contemplating. I made up my mind, got up, and went to Connie's room.

Her door wasn't closed all the way. "Mom?"

"What is it, honey?"

I pushed the door open. Connie was standing there in just her underwear.

I felt a little ashamed for intruding. I had never seen her that way. "I'm sorry." I started to back out of the room.

"Don't be silly, honey, come in."

I did as she said but took care not to stare.

"That looks nice on you." She commented about the nightie. "It looks comfortable."

"It is, very." I kept my eyes everywhere but on her. She sensed I was uncomfortable.

"Since when can't a mother and daughter see each other in their underwear?"

Sweet, I thought. Too bad I wasn't as comfortable with it as she was. Her reference to our being mother and daughter wasn't in jest. There was none of the humor in her voice that normally went with our kidding about our situation. It was an arrangement I was comfortable with now. In fact, I enjoyed it. It made me feel closer to her.

"What's up?" She asked, giving me her full attention.

"There's just something . . . "

Connie seemed to read me like a book. Sitting on the edge of her bed, she called me to her side. "Come here, Honey."

I sat down next to her. I didn't know where to start.

"Tell me what's bothering you."

"I was just worrying about something."

"Something about Jennifer?"

Jennifer was just fine at the moment. Quite content, in fact. "No, I'm all right. I was worried about you."

I looked up and saw her smiling. "You're worried about me? I'm all right, Sweetheart."

"Remember, over at Virginia's last night? When she showed me the room, she fixed it up for me."

"Of course."

"Well, you seemed upset somehow."

"No, Honey. I wasn't upset. I was happy for you." She insisted.

"You looked hurt." I went on. I knew I wasn't mistaken about what I saw.

When she didn't respond, I knew I was right.

"I just wanted you to know that no matter what Virginia does for me or what she gives me, nothing is as important to me as you are." I wasn't sure I said it right, the way I had intended for it to come out. It seemed inadequate to express how I felt about her.

She still said nothing.

"She's like an Aunt to me, and I appreciate all she’s done, but I don't feel about her the way I feel about you."

Connie's eyes filled with tears as I spoke. The two of us seemed to cry together all the time lately. "What I'm trying to say is that I love you, and nothing will ever change that."

She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. "Oh, Jennifer. How did I ever get so lucky to find you? You are the dearest thing. I love you so much. I have since I first saw you. You've become the daughter I never had, and I adore you."

My tears came quickly and seemed to just flow in torrents. I held her as tightly as she held me. "I've never been happier," I told her.

Virginia had been right about it taking too long to set my hair wet in the morning. I was glad I tried setting it dry and slept in the curlers. It looked so nice Sunday night that I just had to wear it the same way Monday.