A Christmas Gift - Dec 25

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On Wednesday, December 25th, Good morning, Mr. Diary. And I do mean morning because it's 8:30 a.m., and I've been up for 3 hours already. Mom will be here in an hour, and I figured I might not get a chance to write to you, and I promised Aunt Jan that I would. Because it's Christmas too, Merry Christmas to Mr. Diary.

Okay, I didn't have to wear that annoying see-thru thing last night. Thank God. Instead, my aunt got me a pair of PJs. I mean, they were light pink and had tweety birds all over them. But they had pants and a shirt part, so phew. I mean, it's still pretty sissy, but they did feel real comfy. They were really cozy, and I slept like a baby. The girl undies didn't even bother me; I guess I stretched this pair out enough today, so they weren't crawling up my booty. I think we need to burn the first pair.

Okay, anyway, my aunt woke me up at 5:30 in the morning. No one was up; it made me think that it was the night before Christmas and all through the house song. Except we were stirring. Okay, so I had to take another bath. After this is done, I'm not taking a bath for a whole month because I'm all caught up. This time my aunt didn't wash me. Thank God. She put a kind of hat on my head so my hair wouldn't get wet. It was, of course, pink. And she put these smelly little balls in the water. Now I smell like apricot, pear, or something. It would be ideal for a fruit-scented fruitcake, in my opinion. My aunt said I know how to wash right, and if I didn't, she would scrub me head to toe. So I got everywhere, even behind my ears and between my toes.

I got out, and my skin was smelly; it made me hungry. But also, my skin was really smooth, like that first sleeping dress was, I think. I think I know why girls do that bath ball stuff. When the air hit me, it was cool and gave me goose pimples all over; it kind of felt good. I didn't tell my aunt, though, because she would make me smell like fruit all the time.

Okay, today's undies are candy canes and Christmas trees. They must be bigger because they don't feel so weird, and they are just the right fit for my booty. Mr. Willy didn't act up either, which was good because my aunt was going to dress me. Okay, I got out. I had the towel wrapped under my arms, so I wasn't prancing around like a fairy in girl undergarments; I was in a towel, okay. The first thing my aunt did was dry me off better. I hated that. She put some powder on me too, so I smell like a baby fruit-smelling fruitcake.

She then got a new pair of tights, except they aren't titles; they are pantyhose. They are the same thing and go on the same way but have a different name. Does that sound stupid or what? These were really thin, though, and all over my legs were little white hearts, and the middle part covered up the candy canes. You can hardly see them. You can see my feet through them. My aunt says that's why they are different from tights, but they are still the same thing in my book. But once they were on and I knew they were on, I felt the heartbeat in my willy again. I don't know why it keeps doing this; it's annoying, and I'm afraid aunt Jan knows about it.

Okay, now she's got a green velvet dress. Like a pool table, I thought. But it's hunter green, and I am so glad it isn't a sissy, prissy white, or pink. This is how stupid girls are, though. It zips up in the back. If I was by myself, I couldn't zip it, and if someone doesn't help me tonight, I'll just tear it off, but a real girl wouldn't tear off the stupid dress. Then my aunt puts this really big red flannel bow on me. I mean big too. It covers my whole tummy, but the bow part was behind me on my but. If I have to take a piss, the bow will be ruined, I think.

Okay, I was dressed. Then she did my hair. She made it poofy. I'm really getting it shaved now. She combed it forward and said I had nice bangs in the front. Bangs. I've been having sissy bangs this whole time. I'm cutting them off too. She put little red and green hair clips in my hair too. This is so humiliating. I also have the shiny black shoes on. If I look down, I can see my face almost. Then my aunt sprayed me with perfume as if I didn't smell enough.

My aunt then says, "I can't look at this and be called Tom; Tom isn't a girl's name." We tried some cool ones, like from WWE, but my aunt didn't care for them. Then I said, "What about Tammy?" because my friends call me Tommy, and Tammy is kind of the same, and I wouldn't be so confused. She liked that one.

Well, mom is going to be here. I hope she hates it and makes me stop. This way, I get to keep the computer and don't have to do this stupid stuff. And for the record, I am doing this because I want the computer, and I want Mom to be happy. I do not like being a sissy.

Wednesday, December 25th, Dear Diary I know I wrote to you today, but a lot happened, so I think I should write more.

Okay, mom came over, and I hid in my room at Aunt Jan's house. Aunt Jan said that she had a little gift, and I walked out looking like a sissy. Mom's mouth just went wide open, and I thought she was mad, and I was like, "Yes, I can get out of this." I told her I knew she was sad because we were expecting a little sister, and we knew she wanted a girl and that for Christmas until school started, I was going to be her girl Tammy that she didn't get.

Mom started to cry. She hugged me and thanked me, and said it was the best gift I could give her and that she loved me. "Your welcome," I said, but on the inside, I was cursing because I expected her to say, "You don't have to if you don't want to, but you're not a girl."No, she said she loved it. She gave me a kiss on each cheek, hugged me a lot, and said I looked pretty. At least Mom was nice enough to lie about how I looked.

I know I make an ugly girl, but she was nice, and she liked this so much that I guess I can make it until school starts. I mean, it will be just around the house, and mom had a tough year, and she deserves to be happy a little bit.

Okay, so we get into the car. Sit first, then put your feet in so you don't flash the world. If someone saw, I think they'd have a heart attack. We went back to my actual home, which I had hardly visited this week. Mom says I can get my gifts right away. I already know about the computer, and I'm hoping my mom got me a few new games for my PS2 because I don't even want to touch Madden until 2004 comes out.

Okay, we get home, and there are no gifts under the tree, just a card on one of them. My mom says my gift is in my room. So I went into the room, and there was the computer my aunt bought and a new desk. Well, it wasn't new because the Salvation Army sticker was stuck on the back leg. I went out and thanked her for the computer and desk as best I could.

She told me that the computer was nothing special and that my aunt had picked out something inexpensive so I could do my homework. I guess Aunt Jan didn't want my mom to know that it was nearly $3,000 with everything. It even had a flat-screen monitor, but my mom is computer stupid, so she wouldn't know old from new. I thanked Aunt Jan and pretended it was a total surprise. I think if I had told Mom I was dressed as a fruitcake for that thing, she would have been mad, and I want her to be happy. Okay, she said to me that she didn't know what games I wanted but that the envelope would help me pick out something I liked.

I was like, "score, money." Money is always good, sometimes better than stuff. Well, it was a money order for 25 dollars. 25 bucks can't buy a game, but I didn't say anything. I said thank you as best I could. Honest, I said thank you nicely, not like "yeah, thanks, I'd rather have rabies but a real thanks." Mom started to cry. She said last year she knew I got a lot of gifts, and this year, with dad skipping out, she had to worry about the mortgage and bills.

I told her last year that I didn't get a computer and a cool new desk for my room. But when Mom cried, it made me cry as well. I hate seeing mom cry. It wasn't her fault that the baby died inside her, and everyone was sad, but she had a right to be sadder than anyone because the baby died inside her. And dad had no right to leave with some slut, and I can't blame mom because she is really trying hard. So we just cried together, and Mom was just holding me. We must have been crying for thirty minutes, but mom stopped and said that we could still have the best Christmas ever because we had each other.

I think she is right. I didn't tell her, but I think I will buy her something with the gift certificate instead of a toy. A mom and Tammy for Christmas, I guess.

Well, mom said we were going to Paul's house for dinner. Paul is her gay friend. I know he is gay because everyone says your mom's gay friend Paul is. She said he would get a kick out of seeing me like this. I figure, why not? He's a fruitcake too. Okay, first Mom washed her face, and Aunt Jan did mine. I told her going out wasn't part of our deal. She said our deal was for a rinky-dink computer, and she went above and beyond, and I should too. I guess she was right because I told her okay.

So we went to Paul's house. He said, "Who is this little princess?" and Mom whispered in his ears. He was like, "Wow, I didn't even recognize you, Tommy." I told him I was tammy until the 6th as a Christmas gift to mom. He loved that and pinched my cheek. I hate it when big people do that.

At first, I thought it was just going to be him and us. But then Glenn and Alexis came over with their little girl. But here's the embarrassing part: they have a two-year-old, and we were dressed as if he were. I could have died. And to make matters worse, everyone said how we looked like sisters. They took pictures and everything. One night, I'm going to have to break in like a cat burglar and steal them. They might blackmail me later.

Now here is the thing about Glenn and Alexis. They are both gay. Well, Glenn is gay, and Alexis is a lesbo. I don't have anything wrong with it. It's their life as long as they don't include me. Well, they got married, I guess to hide it, and they have a little girl, Tonya. So it was Tammy and Tonya all day, the two sisters. It was so annoying.

Okay, being there wasn't all bad, I'll admit it. It was kind of nice to have people notice me, even if it was for the wrong reason. Paul didn't even say children should be seen and not heard, not even once. He usually says it 300 times. Everyone was nice and said I was cute. At least they kept up the lie for mom's sake. I think mom thinks I'm cute, but that's because I'm her daughter's son, and she is supposed to say things like that.

Okay, I mostly played with Tonya, but that's because there were no other kids around to play with. We played with dolls, but that's because we didn't have anything else, not because I am becoming a total sissy fruitcake. I did get to eat at the big table, even if I sat next to Tonya. Everyone said again, we looked like two peas in a pod.

Now some cool things have happened. I got two Christmas cards. One from Paul and one from Glenn and Alexis. Get this, I got 100 dollars from each. WOW. 200 bucks. I'm going to get some really cool stuff. Boy stuff like killer robots or football equipment,

Okay, and Glenn and Alexis also gave me a doll. They said it was for the baby if others were giving gifts. For your mom's sake, it was so corny, but they said in my ear, "Go along, be a girl." So I did. But they gave me the receipt, so I could exchange it later. So I thanked them for the pretty doll as best I could and said I would be the best mommy ever if my mom didn't already have that job.

Mom teared up, and Glenn said that I was alright. That kind of felt good, making my mom so happy that she cried. Okay, at around six o'clock, Tonya got cranky and needed to sleep. I got her in my arms and read her a book. She fell fast asleep. I am good at telling stories. But it felt really good to cradle her and make her fall asleep. It was weird but good.

Okay, so Glenn and Alexis were watching me read and rock her to sleep. They said I did a good job. I like it when people compliment me, I guess. So, they need a babysitter for when her daycare ends at 3 p.m., so right after school for 3 hours a day, they want me to do it. They said they would pay 50 bucks. With 50 bucks, I can be rich and not go to high school.

At first, I asked if I had to dress like this as a girl to do it. They said only if I wanted it, so no! I said, okay, and I'm going to start right when school starts. So that's cool. Something good is coming out of being a fruitcake, and when this is over, and I don't have to be tortured with dresses, I'll have a computer and a job. So cool.

Okay, mom wants to read me a story and put me to bed like I did to Tonya, so I'm going to say good night, Mr. Diary. I do want to say that it wasn't that bad of a Christmas, but don't tell anyone.