The Wonderland Raid part 2 rough draft

The Wonderland raid part 2

Vess looked around at the rows upon rows of vials filled with red liquid stretched out before her. She scratched at her chin with one hand and used her other hand to snap her fingers. “How am I supposed to get these potions out of here?” She sighed and looked at the hundreds of small cakes marked eat me on the other side of the gardens. “Not to mention how am I supposed to get those out of here?” She shook her head. “This is going to be a nightmare.”

Vess turned her head as she heard voices coming from behind her. “I want the pastries and potions here triple checked by the end of the day.”

“But my queen, we barely have enough time to check the royal supplies once.”

Vess ducked out of sight as the royal procession came into view. Her eyes widened as she noticed just who the voices belonged to. “Are you questioning me?”

“No no no no?” A living two of spades playing card waved his hands back and forth. “Of course not my queen. I... Would never dare to question you.”

A mountain of a woman in a dark red dress covered in hearts walked forward and grabbed the living playing card pulling him off the ground. “Lucky for you I am in a good mood today.” She snorted and used her free hand to hit the poor lad on the head with her scepter. “I do not want excuses. I want results.” She raised her voice. “Now I am not going to repeat myself. Get to it or heads will roll.”

Vess gulped. “Well, this sure complicates things.” She ran her hands through her dark hair. “So now I also have to contend with these weird human like...” She shook her hand out in front of her. “Deck of cards? Is that what I'm really dealing with right now? As if a giant rabbit in a trench coat and finding a goldmine of size changing food and drinks wasn't enough there has to be living playing cards.” She shook her head and ducked behind a nearby bush. “If I do get out of here no one is going to ever believe this”

She approached the first pile of cakes marked eat me. “I need to come up with a plan and quickly.” She turned her head. “Preferably before the spade brigade find me.” She looked at the cakes in front of her and scratched her chin. “I know there is something I can do but it's just not coming to me.” Vess sighed. “Come on, think.”

“Hey! Who are you?”

Vess turned around and smiled. “I am...” She scratched at the back of her head. “I am the help that your queen sent for you.” She gulped. I hope that Lady in the exotic dress was a queen.

The two of spades walked up until he was right in her face. “The red queen didn't say she was sending any kind of unique help.” He narrowed his eyes and examined Vess. “Are you sure that the red queen sent you?”

Straightened her back. “You dare question the will of the red queen?” Vess rapidly blinked her eyes to try and make herself look more menacing. “Do you want me to tell the queen of this?”

His face filled suddenly with fear. “Oh no. Please no, anything but that.” the two of spades fell at her feet. “We are sorry we questioned you. Go about your business.”

Vess smirked. That worked out better than I though. She was about to turn around when a devious thought crossed her mind. “One more thing. The red queen wants you to help me transport these through that door over there.” She pointed at the small doorway through which she had entered the gardens from.

“But there is nothing that way except for a maze of hallways and the entrance to Wonderland.”

“Well, your queen feels that these pastries and potions can better be documented in there.” Vess crossed her arms. “I mean you can take it up with the queen herself. But do you really want to anger her? I sure wouldn't. I'm a fan of keeping my head on its shoulders.”

He shuddered. “I want my head on its shoulders as well. We all do.” He turned his head. “let's get the eat me cakes and drink me potions back into the hall of tears. For the red queen.”

Vess held in a laugh as the playing cards went to do her work for her. I can't believe my luck. This went from a worst-case scenario to best case scenario in a matter of moments. Now I just need to figure out how to get back up that damn hole and I will be home free. She smiled wickedly.

As the playing cards went to work, she walked back into the circular room. “Ok now I need to figure out how to get back to that rabbit hole.” She scratched at the side of her head. “There has to be some way to find a way back there. Or at the very least an alternative way out of this, um what did they call it, Wonderland? It doesn't matter as long as I get out of here.”

She turned around as the four of clubs dragged in a pile of eat me pastries. “Hmm maybe if I can't find my way out of here...” She picked up one of the small cakes and examined it. “I can open my own route out of here. I mean I only fell down here right? If I eat enough of these I could break my way right back up to the surface.” She threw the small cake up into the air and caught it. “Speaking of which if I do find that damn rabbit hole I can just eat these grow and climb my way out with my loot.” Vess laughed. “It's perfect either way. Soon I will have the world's best merchandise at my disposal.”

Vess held her hand up as four of clubs began to walk off. “Excuse me.” He turned around and narrowed his eyes. “Can you answer something for me.”

“What is it?”

“Can you point me in the direction of the rabbit hole?”

“Do you mean the entrance to Wonderland?” he scratched at his head. “What kind of loonie calls it the rabbit hole?”

She narrowed her eyes. “Someone who is friends with the red queen does. Now will you tell me or not?”

He sighed. “That door right there.” Vess turned and look to see where his arm pointed. “Once you head into the corridor of hallways the entrance to Wonderland will be the 4th door on your right.” he sighed. “Why do you want to know?”

“I was just curious.” Vess smiled. “that'll be all you can get back to what you were doing.”

He rolled his eyes and turned around.

Vess rubbed her hands together. “Now I know how get out. Now I know where I can get out.” she turned her head and looked at the playing cards as they deposited her goods into the room. “Now I just need to wait until everything is in place.” She looked at the pastry in her hand. “Once everything is ready it'll be time to grow and get out of here.” Vess smiled.

***

Vess sat up as one of the playing cards began to poke in her face. “Hey! what do you think you are doing?”

“We are finished. Get up. The queen is coming.”

Vess rubbed her eyes. “That is absurd. She can't be coming.” Vess shook her head as she walked towards the gigantic pile of potions. She lowered her voice. “That old hag can't ruin things now. I am just about ready to make off with my goods from this crazy place.” She clenched her hands into a fist. “this can't be happening.”

“Who is responsible for this atrocity?” the red queen stormed into the room, her scepter dragging on the floor. “Speak up now so I can remove your head.”

Everyone in the room trembled. The two of spades slowly walked forward. “My queen. We thought. . .”

“You thought what?” She narrowed her beaty eyes. “That I would like all of the royal supplies moved in here for no reason?”

Vess moved in front of one of the Eat Me cake piles and grabbed a pastry while everyone was distracted.

“But you said.”

The queen's eyes widened in rage. “I said? When did I say for you to bring these things into this forsaken place? you know I have lost all of my patience. Off with your head.”

The two of spades held his measly arms over his head. “No please. It wasn't my fault.”

“You won't have to worry about that anymore without your head.” The red queen turned around. “Where is my executioner?”

The two of spades pointed at Vess. “It was her. She was the one who told us to come here.”

Vess shoved the eat me pastry into her mouth and quickly swallowed it whole. “What me? I would never do such a thing.” She smiled as she felt a tingle run through her body. “I think it was the four of clubs that did this.”

The red queen narrowed her eyes and walked over. “Who are you? I have never seen you before.”

Vess Shrugged her shoulders. “I am just someone who is passing on through. There isn't any harm in that now is there?”

“People do not just pass through Wonderland.” the red queen grabbed Vess by the shirt. “And you do not look like that annoying Alice girl. So I will ask again who are you?”

Vess gulped.Why hasn't my body started to grow yet? I can't keep stalling forever. This damn growth cake better kicking soon or I might be the one who is losing a head. “I don't think that I need to tell you.” She laughed. “I mean is there any reason why you need to know who I am?”

“I am the red queen. Everyone does what I say, or they lose their heads.” The queen tapped Vess on the head with her scepter. “So, I will give you one last chance because I'm feeling a little bit generous for some reason. Tell me who you are if you want to keep that pretty little head of yours.”

Vess could feel her clothing began to tighten. “Oh I don’t think I will have to do that anymore.” She looked down as her toes began to push through her shoes. “I think you will be doing what I say soon enough.” Vess giggled.

The Red Queen took a few steps back. “What did you do?” She shook her head. “What is my executioner? I want her head off before it gets any bigger. You hear me? Off with her head.”

Vess ignored her as she coutuined to grow and instead turned towards the group of playing cards. “You!” She winced as her feet burst through her shoes and her waist line tightened around her like a vice. “I need you to drag all of these goods towards the rabbit hole, err I mean entrance of Wonderland.” She sighed. “On the double.”

The two of spades shook his head. “Or what?”

Vess slammed her foot down. “Or I will rip you in half.” She laughed. “You all will soon be the size of normal playing cards to me. So don’t test me. Now go!”

They rushed off to do her bidding once more as the button on her pants snapped off her body. “Ugh.” Vess grabbed at her waistline. “Why the fuck aren’t my clothes growing with me this time? What is wrong with this place.” She sighed. “I didn’t want to get back my home naked.  Ughh.”