Sunday Morning

I'm not awake yet, but I feel him moving next to me and a part of me is already responding.

I'm asleep. Kinda. But I open my eyes a little and look at him, and he's propped on his elbow looking at me, fully awake, and then I smile at him and he smiles at me and I wake up to him.

He looks at me and I look at him and feel myself irresistibly drawn towards him. He's like gravity, like magnetism, like a force of nature I can't stop. When he looks at me like that I would do anything for him, just to have a chance to see him look at me like that again. 

And we kiss.

That kiss... it's not like I had a chance against him before the kiss, but after it I'm completely lost. That kiss fills me with lust, I can't think of anything except wanting the kiss to last longer.

We roll on the bed and he lays on top of me, where he belongs.

Looking at us you would never think it's like this. I look like I should be on top. I'm more masculine, more muscular, I have the tattoos and the piercings and the rough boy picture, while he's pale and slender and shorter and he just looks... soft. 

So soft... 

His soft skin against me, that's why he's on top. His soft lips kissing mine, his soft words in my ear. It doesn't matter if I'm stronger than him when he can make me want to submit to him with a single soft touch of his hands.

He kisses down my body, slowly and gently. His tongue traces a soft circle around my nipples and I hear myself moan like my mouth doesn't belong to me anymore. I'm losing control of my body, I'm just a mass of helpless desire focused on him.

He goes down. 

My cock is hard, it has been hard since the moment our eyes crossed, and it's hard for him and only for him. Once you've had the real thing nothing else will do.

Six months ago I would have never imagined this would be my life. I still don't know how it happened and I don't try to understand it. 

Six months ago I was straight, but since I met him I've never wanted another woman. Or another guy, for what is worth. He's the only one I want. 

If that makes me gay, so be it. I don't care. I don't care about anything as long as I get to stay with him. 

His mouth on my cock, hot and wet and deep, that's the reason I stay. I feel like I'm giving myself to him right now. I'm hard for him, my erection in his mouth is just a way he takes what he wants from me and I moan and pant and sweat and let him suck me, because he wants it.

His tongue caresses the secret crevices under the head of my cock and I feel like I'm melting on the bed. I can't move, all I can do is lay down and let him take what he wants from me. I love this. 

He's back on top of me and he's kissing me and he smiles against my mouth and he just looks at me in the eyes and tells me to suck his cock. 

Yes. 

Yes!

Yes, please.

I roll him on his back and go down, directly to his cock. It's hard inside his shorts, waiting for me, hungry with a hunger that I have to respond to. I know how much he wants me and I love that he's hard for me. Yes, please. Yes to everything you want. I'm yours.

Every time I take his clothes off and uncover his hard cock it feels like the first time. It's always new and fresh and wonderful, so beautiful that my mind fails to remember all of it and I need to be reminded, time and again, and I love that it happens.

His cock in my mouth.

That's it, that's the whole reality. Nothing I can think or say can compare to that. I'm sucking his cock and I can't want anything else in life, it's like right now the world stopped and the universe stopped existing, and all my reality is his cock in my mouth taking me to heaven.

Time stops when I'm sucking his cock, it could be five seconds or two hours, I don't know or care. I just suck him and make him feel good and my reward is the very pleasure I'm giving him. His cock, getting harder and harder inside me, the taste of his flesh, the salty precum trickling on my tongue, that's all I need for this to be worth it. My own pleasure? Who cares?

I don't.

My pleasure comes from his, from knowing I made him feel good, from the certainty that I'm the one he wants to use to get off. That's all I need.

I'm rock hard, but I can't even think about it, not with his cock in my mouth. My own cock won't come into play unless he wants me to.

Five seconds later, two hours later, he pulls me up to him. 

I look at him and feel my heart swell with love and desire. It's amazing what he does to me, how amazing just looking at him makes me feel. The first time we met, even before we talked I knew there was something special about him, and in just ten minutes of talking to him my life changed forever.

I loved him.

It made no sense, one is not supposed to fall in love after talking to someone for ten minutes, but I couldn't deny the feeling, I could not escape it, all I could do was surrender to it and feel it.

Sometimes, the best parts in life aren't supposed to make sense.

It doesn't make sense that the sight of his smooth chest turns me on like it does, that his pink, small nipples create all this wonderful lust inside me, that I'm shivering with desire right now, helpless against him, completely taken over by the desire to let him do whatever he wants with me.

It doesn't make sense, but I can't fight it. I need it. I need him.

When he puts me on all fours and begins rubbing his cock on my ass my heart is thumping so hard and fast I feel like I'm a drum and he's playing me to the beat he wants. I'm forgetting how to speak, I need him inside me so badly I can't even say it, all I can do is rub my ass on his cock, inviting him in me, begging him to fuck me with my entire body.

He talks to me.

I don't know what he's saying and it doesn't matter, all that matters is his voice in my ear, panting to me and talking to me and when I hear his voice rough with desire I just want more and more of it.

I'm down again, on all fours, lowering my head on the mattress and waiting for him to fuck me. I feel almost desperate in my need of him. 

I feel like I have fire instead of blood running through my veins. When his cock finally goes inside me I just lose control, I'm moaning and shivering and covered in sweat, completely out of myself. I can't see. I can't think. My body exists only because of my ass, and my ass exists only to be fucked by him. 

I don't care what the world says, I don't care about my past, I don't care about anything as long as I get to live this. Him. Him, fucking me. Him, going faster and faster, taking my ass and using it for his pleasure. 

This is why I stay with him, because no one else can ever give me this feeling of complete abandonment, the feeling that nothing else matters. 

This is when I feel more me and more real, when I'm getting fucked by him, when he's using me. The first time I made love to him I discovered this need inside me, buried so deep not even I knew it existed. He brought it up to the surface on my skin and made me face it, made me see that I couldn't deny it, he made me see how much I needed to belong to someone and serve someone, and that someone was him. 

We change positions, he puts me on my back and holds my legs up and this is the most helpless I've ever felt and I love it. I can't resist him because I don't want to resist him, because when he looks at me the way he's looking at me right now my will disappears. 

He's in charge, fucking faster and faster, his hair damp with sweat, his face flush with lust and his eyes fixed on mine. His eyes are telling me without words that I'm his property, that I belong to him.

I do.

I know how close I am to orgasm, but I'm so focused on him that it still takes me by surprise when he grabs my cock and suddenly I'm cumming, cumming, a warm flood coming out of my cock and covering my chest and my abs and he smiles at me.

His fingers pick up my cum and take it to his lips. The taste of my orgasm, the taste of my submission to him, the taste of our shared pleasure, that's the final drop for him and he's shaking and twitching and cumming inside me, an climax that is almost violent in his intensity. He's grabbing my face and moaning at me, giving me all of his pleasure and it feels even better than my own climax, because everything in him is better.

He falls on top of me, right where he belongs, and he's kissing me without getting his cock out. My cum tastes amazing in his mouth. He takes a long time to recover, panting and laughing softly and slowly coming down from the cloud of pleasure my body gave him.

His skin against me in the bright light of Sunday morning, that's why I live for.

Looking at us from the outside people would never know how much, how deeply and completely I belong to him. But I don't care, because I know.

And if it doesn't make sense, I don't want it to make sense.

I just want to live it.