The Captain's Heart CH 86

Jeremy’s quarters were larger than he’d ever ask for. By the four toilet rooms, six bedrooms or offices, not including the dining room or

Jeremy’s quarters were larger than he’d ever ask for. By the four toilet rooms, six bedrooms or offices, not including the dining room or lounge, this would house a family. There was even a complete food prep area, along with the food printer.

The corridors leading there had been vacant. Thuruk had mentioned how Gralgiran had asked people to remain indoors on account of what had been done to him. A day of mourning, his friend, which he had trouble enduring even paces away, had explained, was what the people on the ship were taking it as. Mourning one of theirs being hurt in so grave a way.

Jeremy had almost snapped, telling him Gralgiran hadn’t suffered one fucking thing, when he realized that wasn’t who they meant.

They were mourning for how hurt he had been.

Realizing the people he was now scared of cared for him so much hadn’t been the help he wished it had. Whatever that machine had done to him was too deep for knowledge to dislodge.

Thuruk had warned him that once he settled in, it would be impossible to ensure even this part of the ship, which rarely saw traffic unless they had hi-value guests traveling with them, would be cleared if he venture out.

That had sounded like a threat. Try to leave and we’ll know. We’ll bring you back and you won’t enjoy how we punish you for trying to leave.

It had been a warning. He knew that. They were all aware of the state he was in. The fear he now lived with. And they didn’t want to distress him, but they couldn’t stop the ship from functioning; and that meant people had to move about. Maintenance needed to happen; repairs.

Thuruk had asked if Jeremy had wanted company, and he’d immediately moved away, unable to hide the disgust at the suggestion. How could he ever want to have one of them around him if he could help it?

He’d managed to keep the insults to himself, but couldn’t get himself to apologize for the hurt in his friend’s eyes.

Now he was alone in empty quarters too large for him.

He’d done a second round for the rooms, deciding which he’d used as a workshop. His bedroom—the one with the attached shower and two toilet rooms was obvious—when the chime announced someone was at the door.

He looked for an escape.

There had to be another way out. How had he let himself be talked into staying here? Where they could come and do anything they wanted?

He activated the comm from his tablet. “Yes?” He couldn’t stop the trembling in his voice, but he wouldn’t let that silence him. He had fought to be on the ship. Had told those other aliens who argued for him to stay on the station that he wanted nothing of their safety. He was going to fight this. He was going to go to war with what had been done to him and he would rip it apart.

“Technician Jeremy Bradsaw, We are with Maintenance. We have furniture for your apartment.”

They wanted to come in?

“Okay.”

He stared at the unlock option on his tablet. He would let them in. Stay out of the way and direct where he wanted things. They weren’t going to hurt him. The fear was something Omar had implanted in his mind with that cursed machine. He was better than that.

He stared at the button.

He could do this. He could trust that they weren’t here to hurt him. They weren’t friends, but they were friendlies. Allies.

He belonged here.

He wanted to believe the person who’d told him that once.

His mother, maybe.

He stared at the button.

Maybe they’d left by now. Had given up on their plans to invade his sanctuary. If they weren’t there, it was safe to unlock the door, wasn’t it?

He tapped it and felt better for that. Nothing would happen. The door wouldn’t—

It opened, and he bolted to the closest room.

“Technician?” a man called.

“Just—” he swallowed. What was he supposed to do?

Maybe he could tell them to put everything in the furthest room and make a run for the door? “Leave it in the lounge. I’ll put everything away myself.” He couldn’t trust himself not to run off. Even knowing there would be more of them outside, that he was trapped with them on this ship. That this room was the safest place anywhere. A part of him wanted to be away from this immediate threat.

There was movement. Items, large and small, put down, moved about. How long did dropping the little he needed take? He felt like screaming.

Then silence.

He waited.

It was a ploy to get him to leave the safety of the room. The room with the open door, leading to a corridor that led to the lounge.

He snorted a chuckle. Omar couldn’t even be bothered to create a fear he couldn’t reason his way out of.

How had he done this? Some of the scenarios had been based on very personal details. Things he had no way to know? Just what kind of technology did the human military have?

There was no way this was medical, no matter how it might have started.

He was stalling.

He peeked around the side of the door. Saw no one, heard no one. He inched forward, staying by the wall. He saw no one among the furniture. The table and chairs were setup, as was a bowl seat in the lounge. The rest were against the wall.

He carefully checked no one was hiding behind them.

Only then was he able to relax, knowing that no one would bother him.

The chime sounded, and he jumped, then held onto the wall, panting. Then he was at the door, ready to let whoever the asshole who’d startle him like this know he didn’t appreciate it.

And then, he remembered Kelsirians.

He was on their ship.

One of them was on the other side.

What if it was that one? The one he couldn’t wait to see again, here to rip him apart?

“Yes?”

“Jeremy? It’s Xenial.”

Not him, unfortunately, thankfully.

“Yes?” But what could this one want?

“I have something for you.”

“You can’t come in,” he hurried to warn, barely making his tone conciliatory, instead of accusatory.

“I understand.”

“What is it?”

“Coffee.”

He chuckled. “I appreciate it, but it’s not that hard to print a cup.”

“I’m told that if you made it with real grounds, it’s better.”

His finger was over the open button when his mind stopped it with a loud ‘trap!’ why else would he use that? How did he even know about coffee beans?

He looked at his finger, the button. For coffee, the real stuff, wasn’t it worth the risk? If he didn’t open the door, would he leave with it?

“I’m leaving it at the door. There’s everything my research and contacts told me was needed to make coffee from the beans. If you don’t know how, I’ve left a file with the process in your message center. Get better Jeremy. Your Heart isn’t the only one who misses you.”

The silence stretched, his finger hovered over the button. By the time he realized that even without opening the door, there was something he needed to do, to say, Xenial would be well out of hearing range, even for a species with such good hearing.

He leaned against the door and typed.

Thank you, Xenial. I’m sorry for my behavior.

The tablet buzzed as he put it in a pocket.

I understand. We will all be here waiting for you.

Jeremy looked at the message. Fought the threat his mind insisted was there and focused on the meaning. They would wait for him. They would be there once he overcame this.

He wasn’t alone in this.

He opened the door, and on the floor was a large bag with a box containing a variety of devices he wasn’t familiar with. He brought that in, set them on the food prep counter, accessed the file Xenial sent him, and set about making his very first authentic coffee cup.

Outline section 

No Outline

Addition 

Jeremy moving into quarters away from as much people as he can. What do those first days on the ship feel like? How does he adapt?

And we are off the outline again…in a way.

The outline implied a lot of time passing that I want to aim to put on the page. The main reason is that I want Jeremy’s healing to have weight. What was done to him runs deep, and the outline doesn’t convey how much work it is. What that implied passage of time means.

There will still be time passing. And other events taking place on Gral’s side of things. Life doesn’t end just because his Heart was almost ripped out of him.