The World Which Is, CH 105

The trek home is…. Well, I’m not going to say uneventful, but nothing to spend all that much time on either. I mean, it’s pretty much just more of the same. Two more years of more of the same.

Two years of avoiding cities, and mostly avoiding people. When we can’t avoid settlements, we mainly stick to villages or towns that don’t control entry—there aren’t a lot of those. As you can imagine with traveling almost exclusively in the wilderness, there are monster fights. A lot of them. Enough, I gain four levels by the time I get home.

There are enough close calls, where I lose my distance advantage, that I aim for Aether Striding so I get the teleportation branch of magic. I put a point in it after three levels. That and healing magic really change how the fighting goes. Not that we still don’t nearly get our asses handed to us a few times after that.

But we survive, and we get stronger.

Silver’s combat songs get pretty impressive. Beyond the direct attacks, she composes a handful of songs that boost us when we have to fight hand to hand. She even comes up with one that makes magic less expensive. Not significantly, but it still impresses Helen.

Brandon takes us South until we almost reach Memphis, then we go East until past Charlotte, and it’s North to Toronto.

From Kansas City to Memphis, we barely get any rest. The thought that Richard is on our heels pushes us nearly to the breaking point. Me and Brandon come to blows eventually, both our tempers at the edge and the numbers insisting I can take him. I can’t. But I think I surprised him with how hard he had to fight to bring me down.

We were weeks out of the city by then, and Helen forced us to slow down. Blasted Brandon into a river when he tried to tell her she wasn’t in charge. He’s surprisingly fire resistant in his armor, or she went easy on him. I was okay with slowing down by then. Having to fight the numbers during each of my turn on watch was exhausting in its own right.

We remained on our guard well past Memphis. Brandon was certain Richard would fall on us the moment we let it down. It wasn’t until a week after that he finally accepted that we might have lost him.

Fortunately for us, that didn’t prove to be overconfidence.

With the care we put into changing our appearances, which, after months of travel in the wilderness, wasn’t hard. And minimizing when we entered settlements, we grew more and more at ease with the travels. I even started appreciating the scenery again.

Brandon utterly refused to take the journal when I tried handing it to him. He called me so many names then that, if I thought he meant them, I’d be offended. Instead, I paid way too much when I came across anyone with papers to sell, and transcribed it any time we were inside a building.

Aaron has had really interesting adventures, let me tell you that.

The first winter of that trek wasn’t all that bad. We were south enough, it was mostly cold temperatures and colder rains. Although, the nights it snowed, we were stuck in place for a few days.

The second one? It nearly killed us.

We have bad winters in Court, but I forget how having a house, a town, makes even the worse ones easier to deal with. Even outside of Base, who can just make the snow vanish, guards and street crews will clear the snow, see to it everyone had firewood, water, and food. Yes, Court basically comes to a full stop when the bad storms hit, but I can’t remember when someone died because of them.

We almost died a few times that winter.

No matter how prepared we thought we were, and Brandon always thought he’d prepared enough, there would be a storm that reminded us we weren’t in charge. When we were attacked by monsters in the middle of one, that was particularly painful.

Silver lost an eye to that battle. But she’s the reason we won.

Fuck, I never want to be on her bad side.

Silver’s music, when she’s pissed, gets really dark, and, much to Helen’s bafflement, that makes it much stronger. Everything she knows tells her emotions don’t ‘do’ anything to magic. But it’s a reminder that every class has its own way of working.

We really should have found a village for the rest of the winter after the first storm, but we never grew complacent enough to believe Richard couldn’t find us if we stayed in the same place for any amount of time.

Silver went her own way when we reach Buffalo.

By then, she called herself the Sterling Bard, and figured that with the muscles she’d gained, and the eyepatch, Richard wouldn’t know her if they crossed path. Brandon wasn’t so confident, but if there was one thing he has no confidence with, it’s Richard. He is utterly terrified of the man. He refused to go into details, and I didn’t press. I figure I’ll ask my family about him when I get home.

Taking the ferry from Niagara to Toronto is stressful. Confined space filled with stranger is begging to have Richard appear, but he doesn’t. Entering Toronto is simple enough. We identify ourselves. Helen even gets differential treatment when she gives her last name. I guess her Elven appearance is enough to confirm who her parents are, and that they are respected here.

She doesn’t let me just head home from there. She doesn’t even let Brandon contemplate going his own way. She brings us home with her. Me to introduce to her parents, and him, so he won’t have a choice but to explain himself to them.

That part doesn’t go the way she expected, I think.

Their parents are nice. They welcomed me and Brandon with open arms. His father did question Brandon, and the sense of disappointment stole most of Brandon’s bravado when he answered. Handing his mother the necklace he’d taken years before was met with pride on their part.

The most interesting thing, from my point of view, is that there is never a sense they are surprised he and Helen came back. Like they never doubted their children would survive the wild.

Helen’s boyfriend, on the other hand, can’t keep his hands off her, like he can’t believe she’s real. She’s amused by it.

I’m there for a week. I don’t fight very hard to leave before that. As much as I want to get home, after two years of wilderness, I soak in civilization. It also lets me finish my going away present to Brandon, because, in spite of his promise to see me to Court, I can tell on that first day he doesn’t want to leave home.

When I hand him the new journal, containing all my transcription of Aaron’s entries, he’s almost scared of it. Like even that puts him at risk of falling under Richard’s spell.

But this time, when I tell him he has nothing to worry. That he is a good person. It’s not me hoping, it’s not me trying to convince him. I know it.

I’ve seen it over two years of traveling without anything for him to gain, other than returning home. He did nothing grand, although I won’t be surprised if I hear one of Sterling’s ballads proclaiming Brandon some hero of legends. His acts of goodness were small, almost invisible. Helping a woman carry packages, playing with children. Standing in front of an enraged bull…. Okay. That one’s not small, but just for the utter surprise on the bull’s face when it rammed Brandon, and it was the one to bounce away, it was worth it.

I think me telling him he’s a good person is the first time he believes it.

We have sex that night. For the first time.

Believe it or not, Brandon never made a move on me, even once he was free of Richard. I could see he wanted to, and I thought about it a few times, especially on those freezing nights. Brandon is hot in more sense than just his looks. He generates a lot of body heat.

He wasn’t boasting about how good he is.

Even after all the sex I’ve had, he rates at the top.

Or, maybe, it’s just that I care about him a lot. He saw me through a lot, regardless of his reasons.

Leaving is harder than I expect.

He and Helen are like the siblings I don’t have by then, and knowing this is the last time I’ll see them, unless they visit, is painful. Because I’m never coming back to Toronto. Once I’m home, I am never leaving Court.

I can’t.

I’m too dangerous.

The numbers….

They never stop. There’s always there at the back of my mind, everyone I meet, or just see, they run, and with being level twenty-four, it’s the rare person where they don’t turn up in my favor.

In a city like this, it’s just a question of time before I lose this fight.

Brandon walks with me to the caravan coral East of the city. He wavers between apologizing for breaking his promise and explaining why he can’t leave right now, and no matter how often I tell him it’s okay, he starts over.

It’s downright comical.

He lets me go with a promise to visit at some point. But I won’t hold him to that. I know the pull of home, and I think he finally feels like he’s home, instead of just being some place he lives part of the time.

I walk home.

I know there’s a chance Richard is waiting for me there. That if he is, I’m not winning that fight. I don’t know what he is, but I’m not sure he’s human.

Or I’ve just turned him into a monster. It’s not like I’ve interacted all that much with him.

But Brandon never lost his terror of him.

That has to mean something.

The walk from Toronto to Court is downright boring. To the point I head North off the road a few times just for monsters to fight. There’s nothing approaching my level in these parts, but it’s still more fun than the nothing of the road.

The fields take my breath away. It’s early enough in the summer the wheat and barley don’t keep me from seeing Court, but they are what I watch for a long time, as the wind moves the stalks, makes them a sea with waves and currents. I have to dry tears more than once as I walk toward home.

Farmers wave at me while they work, but there’s no sense of recognition from them, or from me. The fact nearly four years have passed since I left actually sinks in. These farmers could have been kids who trained with me. Been to class with me. I was a kid when I left.

Now?

I’m definitely not one anymore.

Entering the town feels…. Profound.

We don’t have guards at the gate. They’re on the walls, watching the roads and fields, but we let anyone who wants enter.

We are a very welcoming town.

Or, we are incredibly naive.

It’s disconcerting I now think like that.

Not a lot has changed, but what does catches me by surprise. There’s the remnant of a fire that took three buildings where the town potter used to be. One of Dad’s favorite baker is now an alchemist. Here and there, changes I never expected happened, and I’m reminded that even my town changes.

I make a detour, because I have to, and probably the biggest change stands before me, although it doesn’t hit me with the force I expect.

Josie’s there, at a loom within the open front of her parent’s house, sending the shuttle back and forth. And she’s pregnant. Very pregnant.

That she’s weaving is almost more shocking than her state. I never envisioned her as something as mundane as a weaver. She was always a guard in my imagination. Fuck, she was the one in charge of all the guards. In those fantasies, she was my wife, future commander.

Fuck, is it weird that this, her, pregnant, weaving, looks more natural than her fighting off monsters in my imagination.

When she glances in my direction, there is no recognition. And that hurts.

I can’t have changed that much. Four years isn’t that long.

Four years of fighting monsters, fighting for my life, learning the world is a lot harsher, and so much more beautiful, that I ever imagine.

Okay. Maybe I have changed that much.

“Can I help you?”

I smile. “Hi, Josie.”

She frowns, studying me. For a second there, I don’t think she’ll recognize me. Then her eyes widen. She’s up and before me, her round belly touching my armor.

“Dennis?”

Being hugged by a pregnant woman is awkward.

“You’re alive! Where have you been? What happened to you? System, why the fuck didn’t you tell me you were leaving?”

That anger is familiar and comforting. Josie was never someone you wanted pissed at you.

I escort her to her loom so she can sit and give her the ultra sanitized version of the last four years. It doesn’t take that long.

“Should I be jealous?” a man says in a mocking tone.

I’m on my feet before I realize it, but, fortunately, I keep from equipping my sword. The man’s taller than I am and muscular, but there’s a softness that makes me think he doesn’t work hard at them. That they happen more by accident than intent. It’s his job that gives them to him.

The numbers are running seconds before I realize who that is.

“Kyle!” she exclaims happily. “You’re home.” She hugs him and the familiarity with which he hugs her back makes it clear he’s the father. “You remember Dennis.”

His expression is utter disbelief as he takes me in.

“McLeod, Dennis? That Dennis? Abandoned his family in the night, Dennis?” the attempt at a mocking tone doesn’t hit the same when his expression is still that he can’t believe what he’s seeing.

I’m pretty sure it’s not that I’m here. Kyle Price never had much of an opinion of me. And now, I realize it was probably because of who my family is. While we aren’t officially in charge, my Grandfather is the town Commander, Base is, well, Base, and he’s just the son of a cobbler. His constant attempt to put me down takes on a new aspect. One that, after my time outside Court, fells kind of sad.

“It’s good to see you again, Kyle.” I offer him my hand, and he hesitates. I don’t have to do anything for him to know I’m the stronger now. Whatever weakness he ever thought being the grandson of the Commander granted me has been carved out by the wilderness.

“I’m glad you made it back,” he says, taking it, and that sounds like actual respect. “Are you staying?” That sounds worried.

“Yeah. I’m done adventuring.”

He nods.

“Josie, it was great seeing you. Take care of yourself. I want to meet the little one once they’re here. Kyle, accompany me out?” It’s barely half a dozen steps to outside the shop, but I’m not telling him what I need to in it.

His reluctance makes it clear he has a sense of what it will be, but he escorts me into the sun.

“If you ever hurt her,” I say in a casual tone. “You better pray to the system I never find out.”

“I would never.” There’s desperation there.

“Good. But people change, Kyle.” The smile I give him isn’t friendly. “I’m proof of that. If you ever feel yourself changing in that direction? Remind yourself I’m what’s waiting afterward. Remind yourself I am nothing like the kid you loved to mock when we were younger.”

The numbers are utterly in my favor. There is no way some town kid like him grew into something that would even make me work at killing him. I’d barely get anything out of it, but if he hurts Josie, I’d still do it.

“I’m sorry for how I treated you, Dennis. I never….”

Yeah, he can’t finish that. But I take the apology for what it’s meant.

“Have a good life, Kyle. And take care of them.” I do not put threat in my tone. We might not have been friends. Probably never will be, but Kyle isn’t a bad person. Josie wouldn’t have someone bad at her side.

I return to my walk home.

His greeting, when it comes, is earlier than I expect. I thought I was still outside his influence.

“Welcome home, Dennis.”

“How did you know it was me?”

“Believe it or not, you’re the only explorer to set foot here,” Base replies.

“Aaron never stopped by?” I mean, I wouldn’t have known about him, back then, but Base?

“I don’t know who that is.”

“Aaron Sentino. The explorer I got the class from. He had the power station as one of his fully explored ruin, so I thought he had to have stopped by Court.”

The ability after Aether Striding is Aether Journey. With that ability, an explorer who has completely explored a ruin can use it as a gate between two of them. It’s more complicated than teleportation, but it would still let him cross the continent easier than Richard could.

“Still never heard of him. If he visited, he never stepped within my sensor range.”

I guess that’s possible. Especially if Aaron knew about Base. And it’s not like we keep him a secret. As I walk, I give him a less sanitized version of the previous four years. I tell him about Dardanus, as well as the fact that he won’t be erased when a new commander takes over for Grandfather Louis.

In return, I learn Grandmother passed the previous year, quietly in her sleep. Her health had begun failing the year before that, and she refused to take potions or use magic to fix it. Only to take the pain away so she could enjoy her last days. She moved in with dad, and he took care of her until the end.

Dad.

That didn’t go as I hoped.

He didn’t explode at me, which is good. I was still afraid he’d see me as this kid he needed to protect from the world. That he’d make me leaving about him.

But I wish the distrust hadn’t been so loud in his eyes.

I know I hurt him, leaving like that, with nothing more than a letter for an explanation, but I didn’t think I’d lost my father then.

He didn’t see his son when he looked at me. There was no joy I was back. No anger. Nothing.

He was looking at the man who had stolen his son away.

Someone who couldn’t have good intentions toward him.

It made for a short reunion, but I wasn’t going anywhere, so, hopefully, I’d be able to mend things.

Base made me a home. I settled in and started working toward becoming part of Court again.

So, yeah. That’s my story.

Yes, I still have the journal. I’m not giving that to someone else, only for them to fall victim to Richard. I’m not giving it to Base for safekeeping, because he told me some of what Richard did to him. Grandpa Louis only cursed him when I asked for what the man had done.

He’s yet to show up, and when he does, I’ll deal with him. Maybe I’ll charm him into the forest and I’ll be the one shove him down a hole. It would be fitting. Although if I do, I’m burying him in it.

But that’s for when, and if, he ever shows up.

Until then, I’ll just be a guard.

Author's afterwords

And that is it. Dennis's story is done. Thank you for reading this. I hope you enjoyed it, in spite of its flaws.

There will not be a follow up. there will not be stories of the past. Or stories of other characters. unless something major happens, and I can't tell you what it would take, this story closes the book on the world.

It's not that I don't like the world. I have more stories for it. 3 in the past, and one that would be Dennis's further adventures. But what I discovered writing this story, forcing myself to stick with it until the end is that LitRPG is not a setting I am capable of writing. the level of structure needed to maintain that, even when the system is pared down to its minimum, gets too much in the way of the discovery writer side of me.

It's also doubtful this will get a second draft. the numbers relating to his story just don't make the needed investment in time worth while. I might clean it, bring the chapters in line with the pared down ones, but that's unsure, since, again, I don't see a return on the needed investment in time to do it.

so, yeah thanks again for reading this story. For the support and encouragement. And I hope you continue to find stories to read on this site.