Never gonna publish this, but y'all can see it. Apocalypse Parenting extra content

Got through my first editing pass on Apocalypse Parenting #5! It's about 10% longer than it was before I started. I was considering adding an epilogue, since I like to put bonus content on the published versions, but after I wrote it I felt like it didn't really add enough, and the ending was better where it was with more left to the imagination. But it's kind of fun in its own right, so I thought I'd share with y'all. There'll be more Measureless Magic next week.

Never-to-be-published Apocalypse Parenting Epilogue:

A tall woman stood in a space station overlooking Europa. Her hair was black and curly, but the black was interspersed with thin coils of other colors, gradients that would take either frequent upkeep or nanotech to maintain.

Her clothing was similarly opulent, made of comfortable and beautiful materials and perfectly tailored to her form.

She looked away from the viewport as she heard the faint buzz of a drone. A small plush turtle flew in to hover beside her.

“Problems?” the woman asked.

“Not exactly,” Pointy said. “Good news, really! Uh, if you can be ready to do an interview by holo in less than three minutes.”

The woman rolled her eyes and gestured, waving a hand to gesture at her immaculate hair and clothes, then out to the rest of the picturesque lounge. “I can be ready in three seconds. I’ve been waiting for this. You know that.”

The turtle and the woman smiled at each other briefly, then the turtle zipped around, setting the markers for where the interviewer would appear and the cameras would record from.

As she set the last one, Pointy started a countdown: “Live in three… two… one!”

A grayish-blue octopoid coalesced a few feet from the human woman and immediately began speaking, the squelching noises of her native speech just barely audible under the translated version: “This is Sways-and-Swoops, reporting to you via live hologram from the headquarters of the new entertainment company that has everyone talking: Good Times Media! Here with me today is the company’s vice-President, Cassiopeia Moretti. Cassiopeia, you’ve launched your new company just weeks into the Maffiyir Company’s latest season. Why?”

Cassie grinned at the camera. “Because we’re trying to steal their viewers, of course.”

The octopoid wriggled. “Oh, how bold! But you’re hardly the first to attempt to claim the Maffiyir Company’s spot as the show-to-watch across the galaxy. Why do you think you’ll succeed where others failed?”

Cassie leaned in. “Three reasons, Sways-and-Swoops. Ethics, Tempo, and Expertise.”

“Fascinating. Can you explain in more detail?”

“I’d love to!” Cassie held up one finger. “First: ethics. Very few races actually like the way the Maffiyir company does things. They have to offer massive prizes to the winners of their contests to make anyone see their actions as fair, and even with that, they face constant legal challenges, which add significantly to their expenses.”

Sways and Swoops swept one tentacle sideways. “And that’s a weakness you intend to exploit, isn’t it?”

Cassie laughed. “I wouldn’t quite put it that way, but it is true that 25% of our profits will be donated to causes that help disadvantaged species, such as Voices for Non-Citizens. Good Times Media is meant to be just that: a force for good in the galaxy. We want to have a positive impact on the lives of our viewers, the lives of our stars, and the lives of those who don’t care for us at all. If you watch our shows, you’ll helping others.”[EC1] 

“Very interesting!” The octopoid said. “But what do you mean by Tempo?”

Cassie shrugged. “It plays right off of the Ethics point. We will be able to run new shows far more often than the Maffiyir Company. There’s really no comparison. In order to make their contests palatable, the Maffiyir company can’t run them frequently. They need to squeeze every drop of profit they can out of any contest, which means rehashing the same content as much as possible and only launching a new season when everyone is tired of them.

“Our contestants are very different than those in the Maffiyir! First, we have many fewer contestants per contest. Second, they’ve all volunteered to compete: not as a species, but personally. Finally, they’re not risking their lives. Even those who don’t win will be rescued before death and restored to health.

“If they’re risking their lives at all, that is! Many of our planned shows won’t be matters of life-and-death.”

Sways-and-Swoops drew her tentacles close to her main body. “That’s one criticism many have raised of Good Times Media. If no one’s dying, there aren’t any real stakes to your contests. Why should anyone watch?”

“Great question! The answer is my third point: Expertise. Unlike many new species, humanity has been able to recover the vast majority of our pre-Maffiyir media. You may know us by our love of clothing, but humanity also has a strong tradition of competitive games. Since we were so successful in our own Maffiyir, we have many, many surviving experts who specialized in games-creation and a rich tradition of games to draw from that are unlike anything the Commonwealth has ever seen.”

Cassie paused. “It is true that, thousands of years ago, humans relied on death to make some of our games more interesting to the audience, but we now consider such motivations… primitive. We don’t need to do that anymore.”[EC2] 

The tentacled octopoid practically exploded outward. “Oh, that’s a supernova of a statement! Bold words from Cassiopeia Moretti. We’ll have to watch and see if Good Times Media can back them up.”

The alien’s form disappeared and Pointy waved a foreleg. “And, cut! You’re off-air.”

Cassie sagged, sinking onto a plush bench nearby. “Thank God. How’d I do?”

Pointy tilted her head. “Pretty well, in my opinion. I would have liked it if you’d have mentioned that our contestants were all from species harmed by past Maffiyirs, and that the prizes they were competing for would go toward trying to help their species recover…”

Cassie waved a hand. “I know, I know! Couldn’t find a way to work that in without getting awkward.”

Pointy nodded. “Well, that’s why you’re the face of the company, and not me.”

“Surprised they didn’t grill me about having an AI company president,” Cassie said.

“They’d rather pretend we didn’t exist,” Pointy said. “Fine by me, as long as they’re not trying to make it happen.”

Cassie smiled. “Fair. But I wasn’t asking what you thought. Gimme the numbers, Pointy.”

“Oh, the numbers are great. You’re trending at the top of every social platform across the galaxy, at least for now. I couldn’t buy that kind of advertising if I wanted to. We’ll make back our investment, at least, even if the attention falls off almost immediately.”

“I… don’t think it will?” Cassie said.

Pointy shook her head. “I think it’s going to go fairly well. I’ve got a range of projections, but I think we have a seventy percent chance of earning enough to get all the humans in our family age-freezing nanos within two years.”

Cassie smiled. “That would be amazing.”[EC3] 

Pointy’s drone flew closer and hovered, and the turtle walked off the edge into Cassie’s lap, lifting her front forelegs high against the woman’s torso. “I’ll make sure we have all the time we need…”

Cassie put a hand on the turtle’s shell as she finished the promise: “…to change the world.”

 [EC1]Hard to accept that this is actually a motivator for people with the stomach to enjoy the mafayir to begin with. Maybe move it to a “last but not least”

 [EC2]It’s cognitively difficult for me to accept that death is really the biggest motivator across the galaxy, when apparently anything is possible with enough wealth to apply to nanite augmentation.

 [EC3]Not sure how I feel about this.  Seems a bit heavy handed/ wish-fulfilment-y.