FAILED-PROJECT FRIDAY: EMPOWERED AND THE MASK CITY MELTDOWN (pt.11): Issue #2 roughs & script, pp. 13-18!

Time to continue serializing my roughs and script for an abortive two-part Guest Artist miniseries titled Empowered and the Mask City Meltdown, which I initially wrote with one particular artist in mind back in 2017 or  so; alas, that first artist didn't end up working on it, so I pitched it to the excellent artist Rob "Robaato" Porter, who had earlier colored a  bunch of Emp covers for me.

After Rob had to turn it down, I abandoned the project entirely, though I did briefly consider drawing it myself as part of Empowered vol. 12, a plan which was soon abandoned in turn as I had no interest whatsoever in drawing all the many, many urban environments this story would've required.

And now, without further ado, our next installment of roughs and script from Empowered and the Mask City Meltdown issue #2, cropped from the original 4-roughs-per-page format for greater clarity. UPDATE: For the record, my script formatting is being torched by the Patreon text set-up's lack of tabs or indents, hence the dialogue bits being a tad challenging to follow. Sorry 'bout that, folks.

PAGE 13

PANEL 1

Panoramic panel looking down at EMP on a rooftop as she stares up into the camera, hair wind-blown, still "telephone"-gesturing as she yells.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

Um, I was seriously afraid of something like this--!

(continued)

So, what, that colossal collage kaijū is the manifestation of all the city's pent-up pain, then?

PANEL 2

Vertically panoramic panel. At FG bottom, we see the small figure of SUPERSUITED EMP on the rooftop, still making the "telephone" gesture as she looks up at the enormous OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ, who looms in the BG beyond and takes up most of the panel.

SFX (SMALL; BY KAIJU ARM AT TOP)

SKREEEK

CAGED DEMONWOLF (NO TAIL; BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE)

Indeed so, sparkle-suited simperer!

EMPOWERED (SMALL)

J-jeez...!

(continued)

We kinda deserve to get flattened by this poor critter, don't we?

PANEL 3

Back to the OVERLOOK setting, where THUGBOY is holding out his SMARTPHONE towards the CAGED DEMONWOLF, whose glowing-lighted frame remains draped over the RAILINGS. NINJETTE is looking down at him with a startled exclamation, BEER BOTTLE in one hand as her body language conveys unease and anxiety.

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE)

And for weeks hence will this architectural avatar of anger continue to rampage, until all its long-stifled anguish is purged!

NINJETTE (SMALL)

For weeks...?

PANEL 4

Close-up on the CAGED DEMONWOLF's frame and glowing lights.

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE; OVERLAPS NEXT PANEL)

Unless, that is, a stouthearted sacrificial lamb were to climb up to its locus of trauma aswirl and discharge its accumulated suffering all at once.

PANEL 5

Shot of EMP on the move, looking upward with a startled expression, hands still held up to her face in the "telephone" gesture.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

!

PANEL 6

As THUGBOY glances over at her (with raised eyebrows) over the tops of his sunglasses, NINJETTE looks alarmed and chagrined as she mutters under her breath. Between them, leave space for EMP's off-panel SMARTPHONE dialogue.

NINJETTE (small)

(Black "censored" block over indicated text) Oh, s**t.

(continued)

This city is the worst.

(continued)

(H-b) >Urpp<

EMPOWERED (ELECTRICAL BALLOON, FROM PHONE; OFF-PANEL BELOW)

Hey, sounds like a plan!

(continued)

Sacrificial lamb, out!

PAGE 14

PANEL 1

Another STORYBOOK page of illustrative, borderless vignettes. This one addresses NINJETTE, so we start off with an image showing her in the familiar shuriken-adorned black costume, framed against a stylized backdrop of the nighttime CITY skyline. (Could use a distorted "fish-eye lens" view on her, maybe.) She looks uncomfortable and out-of-sorts, glancing uneasily off to one side, BEER BOTTLE dangling from one fingerless-gloved hand while she makes an anxious gesture with the other; rubbing the back of her neck, perhaps? Beyond her, in the middleground between NINJETTE and CITY, we see SUPERSUITED EMP smiling happily while gazing out at the city.

NARRATOR (MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

Elissa's ninja bestie never felt quite at home in this city.

(continued)

She was, after all, the proverbial hick from the sticks.

PANEL 2

Closer-up shot of the still uneasy-looking NINJETTE, roughly akin in layout to issue #1's p.21. This time, unlike the CITY SKYLINE BG of the previous image, we see a stylized background of trees and foliage, representing the hidden forest referred to in the narration. Might be a bit of a stretch, here, but if possible, the trees should look vaguely ominous, hinting at the horrific NINJETTE backstory obliquely addressed in the next vignette.

NARRATOR (SMALL; MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

(Or a hidden forest in the wilds of New Jersey, at least.)

PANEL 3

Montage image, framed on one side or the other by a tight close-up of half of NINJETTE's face; head tilted forward, she's frowning as she seemingly glances over to the MONTAGE elements beside her. These are images referencing the character's horrendous family life with her ninja clan, back in the hidden forest referred to in the narration.

We're seeing, amid a few more stylized indications of trees (like PANEL 2), a series of blood spatters around a looming, ominous figure. This is the brawny, stringy-haired, mostly silhouetted shape of NINJETTE'S FATHER, as seen in EMPOWERED vol.7, pp.16 (panel 4), 161, 188, and cover illo (at far left). BEER BOTTLE in one fist, reaching out threateningly towards the camera with another, he also has several star-shaped SHURIKEN sunken into his shoulders and arms, as seen on vol. 7's p.161; blood is dripping and streaming from both those wounds and his outstretched, fingerless-gloved paw. Importantly, we cannot see his face clearly.

A final element of the montage is the wide-eyed, terrified, tearstricken face of a YOUNGER NINJETTE. This could be either the roughly 10-year-old YOUNG NINJETTE seen on v.7's p.188, or the short-haired TEEN NINJETTE seen on v.7's pp.12 (panel 3), 159-62.

NARRATOR (MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

Then again, given her genuinely horrific history with her singularly vile ninja clan...

PANEL 4

Image of NINJETTE taking a long swig from her BEER BOTTLE, framed against another stylized backdrop of the CITY at night.

NARRATOR (MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

...nowhere would ever truly feel like home to her.

(continued)

Or nowhere, save for one place.

PANEL 5

Image of SUPERSUITED EMP grinning and warmly embracing NINJETTE, who's lowering her BEER while glancing back at EMP with a relieved expression, a slight blush on her face as she does so. BG: The stylized nighttime CITY backdrop again.

NARRATOR (MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

And that place was with Elissa.

(continued)

Basking in her affectionate friend's cozy warmth, the lonely ninja did feel at home.

(continued)

At last.

PANEL 6

Close-up on NINJETTE gamely, wanly attempting a smile while being embraced by EMP. A few CITY lights peep around her in the BG.

NARRATOR (MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

So she, too, would grit her teeth and put up with the city Elissa loved.

NARRATOR (SMALL; MIXED-CASE LETTERING; NO OUTLINED CAPTION BOX)

(Grudgingly.)

PAGE 15

PANEL 1

Big panoramic action panel, dominated by an image of the cyclopean OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ lunging down at smashing one of its enormous fists into a BUILDING below, in a failed attempt to crush EMPOWERED; we can see her wee figure as a teeny silhouette (with a color aura to "pop" her out?) leaping out of the churning explosion of dust cloud and spraying debris that results. A jagged, bold-outlined INSERT CLOSE-UP with an arrow pointing to her tiny form helps clarify matters; in it, we see EMP yelling into her "telephone"-gesturing hand, hair streaming as she leaps.

SFX

WHROOM

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

--You said that locus dealie is up in his head, right?

(continued)

I'm on my way up, okay?

PANEL 2

Four vertical action panels finish out the page. Here, a leaping EMP lands on the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ's "arm," or the side of one of the BUILDINGS that makes up its arm. This time, as she momentarily "spider-clings" to the structure, she's stopped doing the "telephone" gesture, and instead is cupping one hand near her mouth as she yells up at the KAIJŪ's distant "head" looming in the BG above her. (Her other hand is engaged in spider-clinging, by the way.)

SIGN ON BUILDING

You deserve this.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

H-Hey!

(continued)

I'm so, so sorry about this, city--!

(continued)

We owe you so much, but--

PANEL 3

EMPOWERED leaps up the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ's "arm" in a series of jumps, with several "impact flashes" stretching down the structure to indicate each successive leap. At the bottom of the panel, she's hurtling close to the camera as she yells up at the KAIJŪ's off-panel "head," one hand cupped near her mouth for an impromptu "hand megaphone."

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

--Oh, screw what everyone else owes you--

(continued)

(H-b) >Hff<

(continued)

--'Cause I owe you everything, all right?

PANEL 4

Long shot of EMPOWERED darting onto the mass of jumbled structures that form the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ's "chest," continuing to yell up at its distant "head." Depending how teeny EMP's figure is, you might want to break out another INSERT CLOSE-UP of her yelling face for clarity.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

You've been so amazingly generous with me--

(continued)

--With everyone living here--

PANEL 5

Close-up shot of EMPOWERED lunging or leaping upward, yelling up into the camera as her hair streams out behind her.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

--And all this time, you were in pain like this--?

PAGE 16

PANEL 1

Panoramic action shot, showing a progression of images as SUPERSUITED EMPOWERED launches herself from FG left into BG right, hurtling towards the looming hulk of the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ's "head," targeting the glowing SIGN that serves as the giant beastie's "face." In close-up profile at far left, EMP yells to the KAIJŪ, then is seen as a series of leaping, flying figures dwindling towards the right as she hurtles towards the SIGN, edgelit by its light.

Note that we see the glowing SIGN on the KAIJU's face clearly this time; in addition to leaving space open for the "YOU DESERVE THIS" text, this time we can see a "blinging" engagement ring with prominent diamond on one side of the SIGN, as this is another serendipitously relevant advertisement.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

I'm gonna make this right, okay?

(continued)

I swear it!

SFX (BY FOREGROUND EMP)

THAPP

SIGN ON KAIJU FACE

You deserve this.

PANEL 2

Smaller (Narrower? Shorter?) panoramic action shot of SUPERSUITED EMPOWERED flying into the glowing SIGN, her airborne figure (partially?) silhouetted against its light. The SIGN's text and diamond ring are prominent in the shot.

EMPOWERED (SMALL)

Um, after one more teensy bit of breakage, okay?

(continued)

Sorry...!

SIGN ON KAIJU FACE

You deserve this.

PANEL 3

Big action panel, showing EMP crashing through into the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ's interior space, shattering glass and other debris (and some spraying electrical sparks) churning around her as she skids across tiled floor; use a nice, low camera angle for maximum energy and visual impact. EMP has flung up an arm (or two) to shield her masked, teeth-gritted face; we can see her SUPERSUIT having torn in several places as she's smashed through glass, a few stray bits of SUPERSUIT trailing behind her.

SFX (BY GLASS IN BG)

KRASHH

SFX (BY EMP'S SKIDDING FEET)

SKSHH

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

Akk--!

PANEL 4

Hair streaming behind her, EMP dashes deeper into the OFFICE BUILDING interior, yelling as she whips one hand up to the side of her face in the familiar thumb-and-pinkie "telephone" gesture.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

Okay, guys, I'm in--!

PANEL 5

Close-up on EMP shouting as she addresses the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ from inside it.

EMPOWERED (BURST BALLOON)

Now, show me where it hurts, won't you, city?

PAGE 17

PANEL 1

A connected chain of EMP "electrical balloons" run across the top of panels 1-3, giving us a running account of EMP's unseen journey into the OFFICE BUILDING KAIJŪ. Here, in the lower portion of the panel, we see an upset NINJETTE leaning over the RAILINGS, shaking her head (if not "face-palming") as she listens to EMP's running commentary with visible dismay.

EMPOWERED (ELECTRICAL BALLOON, NO TAIL; PART OF A CONNECTED CHAIN OF BALLOONS THAT EXTENDS ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE TOPS OF PANELS 1-3)

(H-b) >Unff<

(continued)

Will you please stop trying to crush me, building--?

(continued)

(H-b) >Hahh<

NINJETTE (SMALL)

(H-b) I'm not buzzed enough to handle listening to this...

PANEL 2

Here, the CAGED DEMONWOLF's band-like frame draped over the RAILINGS, multi-colored lights aglow as usual.

EMPOWERED (ELECTRICAL BALLOON, NO TAIL; PART OF A CONNECTED CHAIN OF BALLOONS THAT EXTENDS ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE TOPS OF PANELS 1-3)

Is it down this hallway--?

(continued)

(Larger) >Unghh<

(continued)

Jus' got I-beamed in the face--

(continued)

(H-b) >Groann<

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE)

....

PANEL 3

Close-up of a frustrated and chagrinned THUGBOY, looking down at his SMARTPHONE with disbelief as he mutters under his breath.

EMPOWERED (ELECTRICAL BALLOON, NO TAIL; PART OF A CONNECTED CHAIN OF BALLOONS THAT EXTENDS ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE TOPS OF PANELS 1-3)

Sh-shake it off, Emp--

(continued)

(H-b) >Bluhh<

(continued)

I c'n do this--!

THUGBOY (SMALL)

(Black "censored" block over indicated text) Christ, I hate this f**king city...

PANEL 4

Narrow vertical panel. In the BG at left, a battered looking EMPOWERED staggers out of a cloud of dust amid bits of airborne debris, with her increasingly tattered SUPERSUIT now displaying considerably more tears and gaps than it did on the previous page. One hand held to her face in the thumb-and-pinkie "telephone" gesture, she's speaking while staring towards the curving edge of a glowing, spherical shape in the extreme FG at right; see the next panel's description for more details on this "URBAN TRAUMASWIRL," an important new story element.

EMPOWERED

H-hey, guys.

(continued)

Getting here cost me most of my supersuit, but--

PANEL 5

Big panel, with a reverse angle from the previous panel. Full-figure shot of tatter-suited EMPOWERED standing at FG left, body language conveying confusion and uncertainty; while one hand is held to the side of her face in the "telephone" gesture, the other might be scratching the back of her head or neck in a "huh" gesture.

The rest of the panel is dominated by an image of an 8' to 10' glowing sphere which I'll call the "URBAN TRAUMASWIRL." Around its inner circle, this magical globe displays a spiraling, distorted image of an urban cityscape in the midst of destruction, with the damaged and/or crumbling forms of BUILDINGS curving out from dust clouds and billowing debris to corkscrew inward towards a glowing light at the center of the sphere. GLITTER FX outline the sphere's glowing edges, and sparkle within its twirling, rippling images of urban destruction. This TRAUMASWIRL could be dominated by a single color or color temperature, at least, but I leave that up to you; would fiery or red imagery provide a nice contrast with EMP's supersuit blue? Its light is washing over EMP and the rest of the scene; the BG, from what little we can see around the giant sphere, is a jumbled mess of damaged office building interior detail.

EMPOWERED

--I am very definitely looking at a locus of trauma aswirl.

(continued)

So, um... Now what?

SFX

VRRMMM

PAGE 18

PANEL 1

The spherical URBAN TRAUMASWIRL in the FG, with EMPOWERED visible in the BG through its transparent swirl of distorted cityscape imagery, head cocked to one side as she inspects it with a dubious expression (and body language), still making the "telephone" gesture.

EMPOWERED

Discharging the city's trauma can't be as simple as just, well, touching the swirly thingie, can it?

SFX

VRRMMM

PANEL 2

Shot (a "full-figure" shot, more or less) of the CAGED DEMONWOLF's band-like prison draped over the OVERLOOK RAILING, leaving open space at the top of the panel for his dialogue.

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE)

Simple, aye-- but easy, nay!

(continued)

(large, extra-"dramatic" balloon and text) For you will find that enduring the torrent of amassed torment thus released will be a feat of fortitude agonizing beyond all belief, jackanapes!

PANEL 3

An upset NINJETTE leans over THUGBOY'S SMARTPHONE (she may even be grabbing his wrist) to speak sharply into it, while THUGBOY looks on with a frown.

NINJETTE

Emp, listen to me.

(continued)

You do not have to do this--

EMPOWERED (ELECTRICAL BALLOON, FROM PHONE)

Um, I kinda do, 'Jette.

PANEL 4

Close-up of EMP smiling ruefully as she speaks, still doing the "telephone" gesture; she's lit by the colors of the off-panel TAUMASWIRL. Leave plenty o' room at the top of the panel for her dialogue.

EMPOWERED

Without this goofy-ass city, I wouldn't have you.

(continued)

Or Thugboy.

(continued)

Or my supersuit.

(continued)

Or anything, really.

PANEL 5

Full-figure shot of EMP (seen from behind) framed against the lights URBAN TRAUMASWIRL beyond, hair dramatically swaying, her body language displaying determination and resolve. (Hands on hips? Or fists on hips, for emphasis?)

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE; CONNECTS TO NEXT PANEL'S BALLOONS)

Now, daffily dauntless damsel, brace yourself as you have ne'er, e'er braced yourself before--

SFX (AT BOTTOM OF PANEL)

VRRMMM

PANEL 6

Close-up on the glowing lights of the CAGED DEMONWOLF's alien prison.

CAGED DEMONWOLF (BOLD, JAGGED BALLOON OUTLINE)

--And contact the deadly urban traumaswirl with your costume's mysterious membrane.

(continued)

If, that is, you dare.

PANEL 7

Tight close-up on EMP's masked face as she smiles again, still lit brightly by the off-panel TRAUMASWIRL.

EMPOWERED

Besides, hugging the pain out of a skyscraper kaijū?

(continued)

That is absolutely a me kind of superfeat...! (Little heart)

END PART 3

Anyhoo, there's your penultimate installment of Mask City Meltdown, folks! Stand by for the exciting—and intriguing!—finale next Friday, okay? 

Note that, while this defunct project wraps up on July 1, later next month Failed-Project Friday will return with a look at an unusual, late-90s pitch that I'm very, very glad was not accepted. 

NEXT TIME ON THIS HERE PATREON: Not sure, TBH, but something should be going up on Monday, folks, as we roll with a full workweek of daily posts to finish off the month of June!