Sell you a Bridge chapter 101

The Clock Tower October 1st 2010 11:00 PM EDT

I  was exhausted. Again. We'd been dealing with fallout from the plant  monsters for a day or two now and it was just non stop. Granted we  weren't rebuilding shit or anything (well Zee was with her Uncle Kent  and her dad) but in general it was just reacting to the shit storm that  had blanketed the world. The wrecked streets, the loss of life, it took  us a day to make sure no one we knew died because of how spread out the  attacks were. Luckily Bette was at the school and the shelter didn't  suck so Reggie didn't have to worry like Artemis did.

Speaking  of my best friend, she was currently being pampered and sucked up to  something fierce. Wally, not knowing she was aware of his secret, had no  legitimate explanation for not answering her many, many calls in the  midst of the chaos and was currently groveling constantly to make it up  to her. Artemis played angry but in my aura sight it was east to notice  the waves of smug amusement and satisfaction when her boyfriend had  bouquets and chocolates delivered to her house. As expected of kid flash  the man did not mess around, he went into groveling mode immediately.

Mom  was surprisingly unruffled once things ended and everyone was safe, but  then she was a Gothamite born and raised and this was basically a  Tuesday for us, plus I think having Gojo around making an ass of himself  to cheer her up helped a bit. Now though, I was just...tired. Sitting  alone at the table in the clock tower's main room, and just letting  myself take a breath. I'd been ON pretty much non stop since I got my  power, and while burnout wasn't something I was worried about yet I  really needed to learn to take a second to myself to just breathe. Time  with Zee helped, but there was no replacement for some good old  fashioned alone time.

The  second I'd had that thought had of course been the exact second a chair  next to me had scraped and someone had plopped down in it. Specifically  my cousin Kitrina, looking nearly as god tired as I felt. When she saw  me look up and notice her she gave a nod of greeting. "Hey cousin, mind  if I join you?" I kind of did, but I felt bad that I never spent the  time with Kit I should have, so I shook my head and bid her welcome. She  smiled gratefully at that. "Thanks cousin, glad we get the chance to  talk. Things have been...a little wild."

I  winced. Yeah she'd been kind of thrown in the deep end. Aside from me  not having time for her mostly she'd been tossed to Jim to babysit and  then thrown into the dungeon and all manner of other nonsense. I gave  her an apologetic smile. "Yeah, things have been rough for you huh?  Sorry I haven't been much help there. I'll try my best to be around to  talk to more. How are you doing with everything? Adjusting to powers and  the team and just...all of this shit?" Kit wasn't exactly expressive at  the best of times, and I'd mostly been ignoring her to my shame, so  even with my aura sight I had no clue how she'd been feeling.

She  just shrugged. "It's been weird I won't lie, but then back home wasn't  really normal either by most standards. But all in all it's been fun. A  bit scary and weird but not a bad time. I like everyone here. Reggie is a  goofy money obsessed airhead, Zee is a magic nerd whose so hot even in  her glamour it's kind of intimidating, Artemis is the cast iron bad  bitch who I want to be when I grow up and Jim is the irresponsible cool  uncle I never got to have." She froze a bit. "Not that Uncle Mar isn't  great, but he's kind of a serious guy. Jim is just...fun. It's nice  here. Not so stuffy and restricted. I get the feeling I'm kind of a  fifth wheel though."

She  saw my frown and held her hands up. "I'm not saying you guys haven't  tried to make me feel welcome. Like I said you're all great, I just feel  like I'm not exactly a part of the team. Like I'm an afterthought." She  gave me a sad smile. "Which I get, trust me. I've never really fit in  anywhere. You guys have your whole best friend battle buddies thing and  it's baked in pretty deep. I still appreciate you taking me in like  this. Even if I'm not really one of the gang at least it's because you  guys have an established dynamic and not because you secretly hate me  for being a murderers daughter."

That  one was a bit too specific not to be from experience. I bumped her with  my shoulder. "Hey. None of that. You're a member of the gang for sure.  We're a little set in our ways but I'll try to make more of an effort.  You belong here. Plus you know about Artemis's dad, and you live with  mine. Your old man is hardly the only parent of a less than sterling  reputation we've got. Nobody blames you for the things he's done. Hell  if they did they could blame me just as easily, I'm a Falcone too."

Weirdly  I got a flash of anger from her when I said that, but muted and vague.  Still I looked to see her face looking stiff. "He's never agreed to see  me you know? I've tried. He was a monster to other people but he was  always my daddy. He never brought the crazy home with him, not that I  saw. Then he just agrees to talk to you out of the blue like that? " She  shook her head, her face conflicted and shoulder tense. "I shouldn't  care. Everyone says so. That I shouldn't give a shit what he thinks  because somehow being crazy makes him...I don't know, not my dad or  something? But he was always good to me."

I  winced. That was something I'd never seen from her really, that  jealously, but then again I'd just been berating myself for not paying  attention. I hesitated a second, wondering if this was too heavy a  subject for me to be qualified to deal with, but in the end she was my  cousin and she was hurting and I couldn't not say something at least. "I  didn't ask for that meeting because I was trying to get close to him or  anything Kit, we needed to see him to get that book for Circe. How long  has this been bothering you? I mean it's not like we went out for ice  cream or went bowling or anything, we just talked business."

She  laughed at that, a high, grating sound. "Oh, of course not. No bonding  at all. He just told you the location of his secret hideout and  bequeathed you his most treasured possession." She looked away angrily.  "It's not like I want any part of all that horrible shit, but do you  know what it's like? Coming in second to you like that with my own  father? Uncle Mar might not come across touchy feely but he loves you,  and he's always made it clear without even meaning to that I'm second  best. He doesn't say it, but I know, and I get it, you're his son. But  then my own dad picks you over me too? Like are you really just that  much better than me? But coming here like this and seeing all your  friends I guess you are."

She  laughed again, this time a little brokenly. "Hell, I think I prefer you  to myself too. You're strong and fast and you have powers that seem to  get randomly stronger for like...no reason. You're a literal genius who  never forgets anything and can finish books in minutes that take me  hours or days to read. Oh, and you can fucking FLY now for some reason?"  She was standing now, panting a bit in anger as she stalked back and  forth. I wanted to interrupt her but I somehow knew that I wasn't a  person she wanted to hear from right now."

As  she walked and talked though she seemed to burn off the energy,  becoming more lethargic and unhappy as she went, until she slumped back  into the chair, and aura of despair radiating off her as she looked at  me with her eyes wet with unshed tears. "Is it too much to ask that I be  someone's first choice? That I be important to ANYBODY? I'm not greedy.  Just one person would be enough." I was horrified, and I had no clue  what to say that wouldn't sound like a platitude. What the hell did I  say to that?

She  shook herself then, like a dog shaking off water, and the emotion  seemed to melt away. But that was only what she wanted me to think, I  could see her aura still, and she was just as broken hearted as before.  She sniffled a bit, wiping her eyes carefully with the end of a sleeve.  "God, sorry. Ignore that. Just me being a spaz. I'm sure I'm just  getting used to a new place. I have to find my dynamic with all of you  like we said. Seriously, just forget I said anything." She stood up and  gave me a small smile that didn't reach her eyes. "Thanks for the talk  Morgan."

Before  I could even react she turned and walked quickly out of the room,  almost fleeing from me as I stared in confused disbelief. Jesus. How had  I missed that? I could see people's fucking emotions, how could I not  have noticed the huge chip she had on her shoulder about our dads? She  must have been broadcasting it every time I'd been around her and  mentioned either of them but I hadn't even bothered to look at her, just  ignoring her like she said. Like she was my bratty little cousin who  was going out with me and my friends because dad said she had to.

I  made a mental note to talk to the others about this. She didn't want to  hear any of the reassurances I had to give, they would make things  worse if anything. I'd seen enough to know that for a fact, but maybe if  Zee or Reggie or Artemis reached out to try to be a friend she would  take it better. Probably not Reggie actually. He would probably just  announce that she was part of the group and tell her to stop being  stupid before giving her a big hug. This would end up being a  clusterfuck if she felt like we were pitying her.

Artemis  and Zee had charisma to spare, and that didn't just mean extra levels  in sexy. They had both gotten much better at interacting with other  people. I think half the reason the thing with Giovanni went so well for  us in the tower was because Zee was unconsciously choosing exactly the  right words and expressions to tug on his heart strings. One of them  could probably reach out to her and make it feel like it was just a  whim. I couldn't just leave her in pain like that, even if just fixing  it was something I wasn't remotely qualified to do.

Most  of all I was worried though. Worried about what happened with Annabel  happening again. Missing something this obvious made me feel stupid and  oblivious. To not see this kind of pain in my own cousin, wasn't this  the same mistake I made with my ex all over again? I couldn't help but  be afraid that I had a new enemy at my back now that I never knew about.  But if I treated her like that it would just ensure I drove her away  faster. All I could do was let my friends try to help her and keep an  eye out, and hope one of my only family members didn't turn out to be an  enemy in disguise.