Shout at the Devil chapter 47
Added 2023-10-25 19:19:02 +0000 UTC
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DIPO7Ne3Yj7mrdwsXK_tDYh2kl6ucxsKF9e1ACO0wgs/edit?usp=sharing
Comments
My characters aren't self insert, but I try to base them on a part of me. It helps me get in their heads. Different parts act different but they all have some small similarities to me in some way I think.
Malcolm Tent
2023-10-30 23:15:40 +0000 UTCWell if Ryan's you I guess it fits, idk. It kinda doesn't work to me and that's just looking at the pictures of the other girls you got up there. Not trying to insult your taste, but I thought this was Ryan's story not a self insert. You can't tell me that Elisha looks anywhere near the top of the girls you got up on the other site. I think she only looks better then maybe Tracey and andi. Everyone else is higher. Still thanks for lily moon even if she's basically a goth Hermione so far, just replace huge ass for huge tits lol.
Jordan Lopez
2023-10-30 22:56:05 +0000 UTCSeras will come up soonish. I'm planning to bring her back during the christmas break. I don't like Hermione, and I don't feel like writing her more, so I'm not putting her in the story as a main character, and for the Daphne picture, no. I think Elisha Cuthbert is one of the hottest women of all time so the description fits for me as intended lol, to each their own.
Malcolm Tent
2023-10-30 22:42:20 +0000 UTCAlso could you update your photos of the characters because your Daphne one is totally off the make of what you describe her as. That girl you have up they're for her is cute with a bit of sexy, but no raging sexpot who puts the model the MC's had in the past to shame. Also we need photos for tonk's. And I feel like you left seras way to early. Mc shouldve done more for her or at least had more on screen moments of him checking up on her
Jordan Lopez
2023-10-30 22:37:34 +0000 UTCLove the story so far although I do have some concerns about how your handling the age up process. Like making them wait for apperation. I do wonder why you have it out against Hermione? You can't tease us with her having a beautiful big ass and then be like "yeah naw guys no way the mc wouldn't try to tame that sassy smart ass, but I'll give him multiple other sassy smart ass women" plus you even took down the photo you had of her up on your other place of posting. All I'm saying is that Hermione is totally the type of girl who'd become a devil because she wants to learn all the magical lore she can and what better way to do that then get with a sexy bloke devil whose rich and can make her semi immortal.
Jordan Lopez
2023-10-30 22:28:37 +0000 UTC
