✨ 🍵 Spilling Tea 🍵 ✨ [Why It's Good to Romanticise Your Life] [Monthly Newsletter] [April 2021]

Today's topic: Why It's Good to Romanticise Your Life [In My Opinion]

So, in my humble opinion, we need to fall in love with our lives. Or at least, we need to try to.

So much of our daily lives is, well, uninspiring. From the news, to the people we work with, to the circumstances we live in, life can leave us feeling a little less than pumped. And to a great extent, that’s unavoidable. A huge portion of adult life is doing things we don’t want to in order to achieve something we do. So, we go to a shitty job, we tolerate people that vex us, we put on a smile and we tell ourselves “only so many hours till home”. And then we get home, and if we’re lucky, our home is our safe, little microcosm that’s just for us.

Home is base. Home is the reward. Home is who we really are.

And in my opinion, there’s something really beautiful about that. So, we can’t avoid complication or drudgery or doing things we don’t want to. So, what can we do? Well, as simple as it sounds, we can make the most of the good stuff. We can maximise the stuff that makes the work worth it! We can fall in love with our lives, or at least try some well-intentioned flirting. Small steps and all that.

Now, have you ever seen a Studio Ghibli film? If not, I highly recommend them, but if you have, you might already know where I’m going with this. So, Studio Ghibli films, whilst sometimes fantastical, often celebrate and romanticise the everydayness of life. From the golden gleam of tea pouring into a cup, to the quaintness of walking in the sunshine, Ghibli films have an amazing way of getting you excited about being alive. They inspire liveliness and romance in everyday things and actively make you want to do said things: to make a cup of tea (and use the fancy cups), to set out a picnic blanket in the back garden, to take time out to read a book, ride a bike, heck, even brush your teeth for the recommended two minutes.

My point is entertainment (in whatever form) can be influential, and if it can be influential, I see no reason it can’t be positive.

So, is the takeaway just to watch Studio Ghibli films? Well, again, I’d highly recommend them, but I think I’m suggesting a little more than that. I’m suggesting that we fill our lives with as much “Ghibli energy” as possible. Now, that could come from watching Ghibli films, or it could come from a particular musician, song, YouTube channel, podcast, perfume, or pasta dish. The point is, I believe we should find things that make us excited about right here, right now.

What I really love about “falling in love with your life” is that it’s such a practical form of romance. Outside of going on dating apps, putting ourselves out there, and inevitably embarrassing ourselves in front of attractive strangers, we have very little control over our romantic success. And that’s probably because it’s very dependent on other people. We can’t control if someone finds us interesting, attractive, or worthwhile, and honestly, we have no right to. But what we have every right to, is creating our own little piece of romance.

Our own little love story, made entirely by us truly!

Self-love, in my humble-pie opinion, is extremely underrated, and it’s far more integral to our happiness than we allow ourselves to believe.

And how can we really explore that, when every story we’ve ever been told ends with “and then they got married and had lots of sex and babies?” Like, okay, but did she go to law school, did he resolve the conflict with his dad, did either of them ever really explore themselves fully before giving their all to this Happily Ever After? Details, people, details!

Yes, it might be easier to say “but things will be better when I meet the one”. And I am not trying to take away the importance that other people have in our lives. Relationships are wonderful, and they absolutely add to our overall happiness, but I also think we underestimate the influence we have over our own personal satisfaction.

And so, I have found, very sincerely, that slowly falling in love with my life, has been very, very positive.

I adore my family, I am very in love with my husband, but I have to know that I cannot control their constancy in my life. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t know if feelings will change, if we’ll become separated by time, space, or even death, but what I do know is that my ultimate happiness is my responsibility. And one of the many ways I’ve been able to fulfil that responsibility is by romanticising the everydayness of being me.

So, I enjoy my morning cup of tea, I listen to the birdsong as I take my dog for a walk, I make my home comfortable and safe, and most of all, I just try to do my best to make my life everything I’d want it to be.

We are all the heroes of our own stories. And my story is about a girl who fell in love with making the best of it.

As always, I really appreciate that life isn't one size fits all. These are just my thoughts, I hope they can be of some use to you.

Best wishes,

Tea