Cabin Fever Court

A Phoenix Wright styled commission that celebrates the friendships of the commissioner!  This one was fun to write; I really enjoyed the style of this piece.

Also, the votes are in--the ocean pred y'all decided on is Tiger Shark.  Look forward to that story tomorrow.

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The five friends were bored staying inside.  But at least the pizza was finally here.

“This is so good,” Ruru said, “but I’m soooo bored!”

“Me too,” Loki muttered.  “I wish there was a game we could play.”

Marcus remembered his time with Phoenix Wright, and grinned.  “I think I have an idea of something we can play together.”

“Really?” Drayko said.

Leme looked down at his half-eaten pizza and smiled.  “Let’s do it.”

__________

/May 4, 5:44 PM

District Court

Cabin Fever Court No. 1/

(An imaginary crowd murmurs in excitement.  Judge Leme slams his gavel, and silences them.)

Judge Leme: Court is now in session for the trial of Loki the Zorua, the accused, and Drayko, the prosecution.

(Marcus puts on a black tie.)

Prosecutor Marcus: The prosecution is ready, Your Honor.

(Marcus puts on a white tie)

Defender Marcus: The defense is ready, Your Honor.

Defender Marcus (to himself): I hope those fingerprint results get here in time. . .

Judge Leme: Well then . . . let’s get started.

(Marcus reviews the court evidence.  There is an oil-stained napkin, and a receipt of purchase for Carl’s Pizza.)

Judge Leme: Is there any more evidence to present.

Defender Marcus: No, Your Honor.

Marcus the Prosecution: No, Your Honor.

Judge Leme: Alright then.  Prosecution, you may call your first witness.

Marcus the Prosecution: The prosecution calls Ruru to the stand.

(Ruru walks to the witness stand.  She is ready to testify.  It is time for WITNESS TESTIMONY.)

Marcus the Prosecution: Ms. Ruru.  Tell the court what you saw on the night of May 3rd.

Ruru: Of course.

(She takes a deep breath.)

Ruru: I was walking home from work when I saw someone eating a pizza box in the bushes.  I didn’t get a good look at them, because it was dark.  But I saw they had along, fluffy tail.

Prosecutor Marcus: Interesting.  Continue.

Ruru: When they saw me, they ran away.  I saw the pizza box they were eating from, though.  I didn’t know it was stolen until Drayko came running up.  They thought I had eaten the pizza at first, but I told them it wasn’t me.  So, we called the police.

Prosecutor Marcus: Your honor, we would like to submit two items into evidence: the empty pizza box that the thief left, and a copy of Ruru’s punch card from work, showing that she wasn’t the one to steal the pizza.

Judge Leme: Your evidence is accepted.  Let’s see it.

(Pizza Box and Ruru’s Punch Card added to the Court Record.)

Judge Leme: Thank you, Ruru.  You may step down.

(The Judge turns to Prosecutor Marcus.)

Judge Leme: Call your next witness.

Prosecutor Marcus: I call . . . Loki to the stand!

(The courtroom gasps.  Loki goes on the witness stand.)

Defender Marcus: Oh dear . . . I hope he doesn’t say anything incriminating!

Prosecutor Marcus: Loki, tell us your version of events on the night of the pizza theft.

Loki: I was taking a walk at the park, to get some fresh air.  Someone ran past me, but I didn’t think anything of it; people run in the park all the time.  It wasn’t until the police came up to me and arrested me—that's when I realized something serious was going on.

Prosecutor Marcus: So why was the receipt and napkin found on your person?

Loki: I assume the thief planted them on me.  I didn’t know they were there until the police searched me!

Prosecutor Marcus: A likely story.  You may step down.

(Loki steps down.  He looks sad.)

Prosecutor Marcus: I call . . . Drayko to the stand!

(Drayko steps onto the stand.  He looks relaxed.)

Prosecutor Marcus: Tell us what happened on the night of May 3.

Drayko: I had just gone to Carl’s Pizza and picked up my favorite pie: jalapeno and banana peppers pizza with tomatoes, chicken and buffalo sauce.  It’s the best!  Oh, my poor pizza. . .

Prosecutor Marcus: Ahem.  Please continue.

Drayko: Right.  So, I put down the pizza for a moment so I could unlock my apartment door.  When I turned to get it, it was gone—and someone was running off with it!

Prosecutor Marcus: What did that individual look like?

Drayko: It was dark, so I couldn’t see too well, but I did see that parts of their fur was blue under the light.

(HOLD IT!)

Defender Marcus: How could you see any lights?  Wasn’t it dark outside?

Drayko: Well, yes, but there are lamps along my street.  So I could see some of what the thief looked like.

Prosecutor Marcus: Yes.  Now, please continue.

Drayko: I tried to chase after the thief, but I tripped and fell!  By the time I got up, they were gone, so I called the police.

Prosecutor Marcus: Thank you.  You may step down.

(Drayko steps off the stand.)

Prosecutor Marcus: So, I think this case is pretty airtight.  Do you agree, judge?

Judge Leme: What do you think, defense?

Defender Marcus: I think . . . there’s one more witness to call!

Judge Leme: Oh?

Defender Marcus: I call . . . Prosecutor Marcus to the stand!

(The courtroom gasps.  Prosecutor Marcus hesitantly takes the stand.)

Defender Marcus: You’re a friend of Drayko, aren’t you.

Prosecutor Marcus: Of course.  That’s why I agreed to take this case.

Defender Marcus: Well, do I have a surprise for you!

(TAKE THAT!)

Defender Marcus: I had the box, napkin, and receipt checked for fingerprints before I arrived.  And guess what?

Prosecutor Marcus: (gulp!)

Defender Marcus: The only prints on them were yours and Drayko’s!  None of Loki’s!

Prosecutor Marcus: W-Well I had to handle the evidence to submit it!

Defender Marcus: Even on the inside of the box, where the pizza was eaten?

Prosecutor Marcus: Oh . . . Oh no!

(He faints.)

Judge Leme: Well, that was a surprise.  Great job, defender Marcus.  We find the defendant, Loki, not guilty.

(Final Verdict: NOT GUILTY.)