What if People Don't Understand?

Who Doesn't??? yikes...What people who say those things don't get it that they are also under the assumption that it's like it just happens or just happened like you get a cold. They fail to realize that it goes back to your childhood.. It is popular to say "I have ADHD" but my response is to get a clear diagnosis! The rejection sensitivity piece has been a major player in my past and it...as far as I know...not able to be diagnosed in a testing situation but once you have some sort of adhd diagnosis a person is able to discern different parts of the whole! Like you said a diagnosis like this can literally explain your whole life as you look all the way back to the first time you remember being you! I got a diagnosis at 66 and went through a bit of a grieving process as I objectively looked back on my life littered with classic addictions...emotional responses...and shame...also control. It's like walking through life on rolling nickels with out any understanding of why you just can't seem to take off and go like other people. ..Always questioning why everyone else can move on after a misunderstanding and you feel stuck even though you have already forgiven. It's like stepping on a snail barefoot and you just can't get the sludge off of your foot. I don't know if you have ever done that but I grew up in the deep south where shoes were optional especially during the summer! lol Take a natural bent on sin and couple it with classic adhd behaviors and thought patterns and I just wonder how I made it this far. I actually have had a successful teaching career. The grace of God literally has carried me over and through some majorly tough events...some I created myself and others happened to me.. Without Christ I would be dead or in jail! One of my favorite books in the Bible is the book of Romans. I am reading it now for a second time in two months and being set free in so many ways that are not just rooted in a sin nature that has been forgiven by the sacrifice of my beloved Savior but I am being set free from bruised and banged up by adhd thought patterns..emotions and actions. There have been many ahha moments for me and a release from shame! I can see that as I understand how my mind is uniquely made is a blessing and not a curse. I am learning to discern what is an adhd flair paired with adhd baggage as opposed to the real truth of a situation. adhd on the down side can magnify a lie and make it seem like the truth. I am enormously grateful for the moments of clarity that are happening. It is not like I don't feel the pain of misunderstanding or being misunderstood...I do...it's just now I am beginning to see things more objectively and not taking everything to heart and storing it there. I have some understanding now and am able to give grace and receive it. I realize that I have gone on and on here....I am home on a sick day with the crud...but with that said isn't it nice when someone takes the time to row with you in your boat just a little while? 🥰

Deborah Montana

Thanks Dave! 😊

How to ADHD

Thank you again! I was, but recently diagnosed in July at age 60. (It explains my whole life). I haven't found stats for anyone over 44 years old. I'll check this source out. Thank you so much!

Kira Masnica

That makes sense. Oh, and in reply to your original question, the current percentage of people (ages 4-17) who have ADHD is estimated at about 10% of the population. That number wouldn't change much (if at all) for adults as well. (Source: Chadd.org)

Thank you for this information. I'm also pretty dang sure she has ADHD. I'm not sure if she has been diagnosed or not. So, that's what makes it so hurtful. Her statement diminished my struggles as well as her own. I'll get over it, but I'll continue to be wary about what I say to her in the future.

Kira Masnica

There's some really helpful statistics at the back of Russell Barkley's book "Taking Charge of Adult ADHD", where he compares a ton of everyday symptoms as they show up for people with ADHD and for those without ADHD. In those numbers, it becomes clear that everyone does experience some degree of ADHD-type symptoms FROM TIME TO TIME. It also becomes clear that those who have (a diagnosis of) ADHD experience a more significant degree of those symptoms A WHOLE LOT OF THE TIME. So then, your "boss" is probably thinking of times when she (or others around her) feels momentarily distracted, or when she occasionally forgets what she was trying to say. These things do happen in her life, but probably not nearly as often as they happen for you.

Thank you

Kira Masnica

Not off the top of my head, I think we mention it in some videos, but sometimes the ratio changes to maintain accuracy for the current time. For stats, I'd recommend googling and going to locations you trust to have good and trustworthy stats. <3 Sorry to hear about your boss-type-person's response. :( It sucks when people have that kind of response...

How to ADHD

Do you know the percentage of people with ADHD? I told a "boss type" person that I have ADHD, and her response was "Who doesn't". It really hurt me and I didn't know how to respond.

Kira Masnica