rianstone

rianstone

Patreon, R&P Q&A #155: Week 55

Added 2022-01-24 17:13:21 +0000 UTC

Patreon, R&P Q&A #155: Week 55

Part I https://youtu.be/7n_ZrSNN3b0

Part II https://youtu.be/7k3UfVGVou8

Youtube subscribers will see you in part 2!

Patreon, R&P Q&A #155: Week 55

Comments

Lifting: I can control 40's on the eccentric side of a lateral raise. How have you not seen Berserk, and unami is pretty fucking weird 10/10 binge. Well my Oodaloop time has been getting better with some of the principles. What does that mean? Well in the moment (rather than after the fact) I'm reminding myself that her feelings are temporary and her words don't necessarily mean anything other than just conveying feelings. This has helped me tremendously in keeping a good attitude and allowed me to laugh things off and still have good evenings. Recently I have been experimenting adding more beta in. I started this journey during pregnancy and definitely removed beta added alpha and had a bung of unattractiveness lol. So I've been attempting to add more beta when she acts good, but not overdo it. Noticed beginning of the cycle I got a lot of good responses and physical touch but that changed mid cycle. I had a kind of realization and wanted to make sure I was on the right track with it. Is it okay to say beta things/ sweet things for comfort but in your mind you realize it is kayfabe and that you're not believing your own words but conveying a good feeling for her to feel? Hope that makes sense. Had a quicky the other night. When i came into the room she hit me with the "not in the mood for sex tonight". Hit her with the "I'm just trying to massage you". After a few min had it led to taking her shirt off. she hit with a little more resistance, but i resurred i just wanted a quicking and nothing crazy. It worked, smashed. She shit tested me in the middle of it lol I just copied back what she said in a funny voice and we laughed. Old women try to carry on conversations after I turn around in checkout lines. Doing well with making small talk. Still not approaching too much, mainly sticking to situations like checkout lines.

2022-01-27 18:26:25 +0000 UTC

My understanding of dread (assuming you're using it) is that even if you get your shit together 100%, she just might not be interested in you anymore. This isn't "Walk away from that bch." More like, maybe she'll never offer more than x1/month again. Figure out if that's what you really want and act as if. Alternately, you might have a do a deep dive into dread again. Like you're starting over. You say you've been doing this for 4-5 years. Maybe you're missing something. One thing I found in my marriage, and have used with success based on the long term results, is that I've explicitly stated how much I expect to have sex. 2-3x weekly. Sometimes it's weekly in reality but I'm busy. It's where you want to be, regardless. My wife, and presumably women, based on that, will pretend not to know what you want in order to preserve their comfortable status quo. Are you letting her preserve the status quo? Are you giving her what she wants for nothing you want in return? I don't know the ins and outs of your marriage, so I'm curious about that.

2022-01-27 17:58:00 +0000 UTC

Thanks for the ass chewing last week. Just kidding, coach! So, you finished my section last week with “And a fun fact, well I’ll leave that surprise. I’ll talk about that after.” I figured you’d mention something later so I listened to 15 minutes about batman origin stories, but gleaned nothing. So, what was the fun fact? (your last sentence was “Right now you just want to establish that you can get away from your house, be flirtatious with women, and plausible deniability”) So, since you cock teased me last week, here’s my batman origin story (quick version): I started this shit like 4-5 years ago from a place of relatively high SMV on the surface. Tall, decent looking, decent shape, mostly had my shit together. I then ran a great Dancing Monkey program to move surface SMV up as much as possible. Then I figured out I was doing it all for her or specifically sex with her. I found rational egoism, started doing things for me and fixing the mental side of things, fixing me. I think I’ve made it pretty far in this journey and made some serious improvement. I’ve read a thousand field reports and OYS’ that always seem to end with “and miraculously she started fucking me more and/or good. My aha moment never came. Now, I’m trying to figure out what to do next. As you know she hasn’t come around in sex frequency and I’m not prepared to get divorced at the moment. So, this shit is coming full circle. Is there anything concrete I can do/work on to try to improve my frequency here? I was inspired by your post last week. Why am I spending time on MRP? More frequency. I never seem to read any stories about a guy working for years and not improving this aspect some. I know the easy answer is “we fix the man” and “you should walk”. I get it. I’d like to use to tools to work on improving frequency, I’m not dense, I don’t expect to turn my frigid wife into a sex kitten, I’m just hoping to turn monthly into weekly. Think the tools can help with that while I wait for my kids to mature a bit? If so, what should I focus on? If you can give me a direction then I can give you a decent detailed field report next week to critique. I think my slow burn improvements and relatively high initial surface SMV have held me back from getting that drastic, "what's happening to my beta" moment. Adding a single point to your outside SMV and taking 5 years to mostly fix your mental models doesn't really generate a rush of dread I suppose.

2022-01-27 16:52:21 +0000 UTC

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