Patreon, R&P Q&A #218 : Week 19

My fiance says I'm bad at being dominant. Honestly, I think I'm pretty good at it. My problem is she is SO specific on what she wants physically. "Hold me this way not that way" "no don't do it like that" "don't spank me on the ass in the same spot". It's incredibly hard for me to know what she wants. If I do something wrong she gets turned totally turned off and makes me feel like a loser. It's like I walk a fine line around her of trying to be the dominant one but she doesn't like half of what I do. She'll call me daddy quite a bit, even just regularly throughout the day and I know she genuinely is giving me the opportunity to be "her dom". I probably do too many things for like asking if she needs more water, can I get you this or that etc. I feel lost. Sorry for lack of information and details. Kind of a confusing situation for me. Please advice. Thanks

Field Report 7: 11/05/2023 It's been three months since my last update, but I still tune in each week. Lifting (Height 5'11", weight 92kg / 202.825 stone, age 29, LTR 6 years): I popped my knee out in MMA training, so I am now doing knees over toes rehab. Bench: 70/80kg comfortably. Legs: Deadlift - 140-160kg / Squat - 40-50kg (due to knees). Sex: Happens 90% of the time when I initiate. But I only last 2-3 minutes now, compared to 20-30 minutes when I used to play basketball at a high level, she use to have multiple orgasms and I use make her my focus, this changed since NMMNG. Any tips here, guys (no pun intended)? I don't masturbate as much as I used to (70% less now), but when I did, I used to practice edging (not ejaculating) I completed reading NMMNG and Praxeology, and I absorbed their teachings well. Currently, I am reading WISNIFG. Although I find many of the tools challenging to implement, except for the broken record, I aim to use negative inquiry more often. ----------------------------- Things that I have achieved from the last field report: During Feb, my LTR wanted to come off the non-hormonal birth control and she said that she wasn’t happy being on it anymore. I simply used broken record and said we are not ready for kids yet. She then told me she wants me to show her that I can finish out of her body, which I complied to few days later, when I did it, I said to her, “that did not really feel great but see I can do it. But I finish outside of you, you might as well be any other girl” (Something along those lines). She has brought up x2/x3 within the past 3 months. I made little progress in communicating my wants and needs in my relationship. My partner left me cute notes around the house, some with tasks while away, including doing the laundry. Although I used to resent it, I did my gym laundry and left the note back in (me being controlling and having convert contracts). I expressed my dislike for doing laundry but offered to fold and put it away instead. My partner was unhappy, and I made the mistake of sharing with her mother. But her main point that she wanted to see if I can do the laundry if she was away or ill. I got the message 2 days later. Lesson learnt. The big thing I kept on saying to myself don’t be scared of her emotions. I am learning to lead the relationship more; she is falling into my frame slowing. She is asking me more and more often what should be do, where should we go. -----------------------------  Goals/ what I am doing next: Physical layer- Maintain my gym and mma routine. Increase my fitness mainly to help last longer in the bedroom. I don’t need any kind of motivation for this layer. Emotional layer: This is still the hardest layer for me. I am still working on not asking for permission and validation from others when it comes to doing stuff for myself and the future. Intellectual layer: - Understand when to use WISNIFG tools - This my biggest person issue is I lack congruence and discipline – E.g. I don’t go to sleep when I said I was going to sleep. I always think of not spending enough evening time with my partner. This has been holding my back from waking up early and working on my side projects. Is this me being as people pleaser and putting myself on fire to keep others warm? I think so. - I treat my side projects as ad-hoc Vision I am starting to have a clear picture of the vision that I want for my life and my LTR. But she isn’t buying the vision yet. E.g., in a joking way she mentioned couple of days ago, “do you remember when you said you will be a millionaire by 27, what happened”. I used fogging and said, “I know it’s harder than I thought it will be”. -----------------------------  Random question From my one of last 2 field report, you mentioned that I am/may be going “Rambo” (i watched the mid-watch video) but I cant see it”. How can I see this.

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