Patreon, R&P Q&A #226

Fr2 MAP: My plan is to treat my frame as the most important thing in my life. I subdivided this plan in five main points: - defending my frame verbally: as soon as I start talking with people in a position of authority my temptation is to just abandon my frame. I want to be more assertive, and being more direct with my ideas, instead of submitting needlessly. - defending my body: boxing is a new activity I started this year and it gives me the confidence that I can actually fight if it needs be. - Talking more: I really like talking, but in the past I would usually only talk if I had somenthing "smart" to say. Now I see that i actually can say dumb stuff and still be loved. - Not keeping score: I notice that when I get in conflict in public with people I tend to ask myself: "why are they so mean to me?" as if stability was what the people are after. I should be more deliberate in my actions, instead of being always on the back foot and deering. - Talking to women without being needy. I have started to talk to women more often, but often ruin the fun of it because I want to please them. Therefore I want to develop a more relaxed style of conversation. Also I tend to stare too long and too often. In general, going and talking to a woman is not the biggest problem anymore. It still takes effort, but it is getting easier. What is the problem what after the door has been opened. I tend to talk about boring stuff, thing that don't drive me, appearing like a bored professor giving a lecture about stuff he doesn't care about. Which means, I'm not using my frame. I went on my first date and screwed it up due to this distance between me and my emotions. Also I'm watching WWF to have an idea what Kayfabe looks like in action. It looks like choosing a gimmick , and sticking to it. Read the Rational Male 1 and 4, l When I say no, I feel guilty, no more mr Nice Guy, Praxeology 1. I'm reading through the Mistery Method. PS: last field report I posted, about 5 weeks ago, you told me that we could have a chat, if I was truly clueless (which I am). I would gladly do so, but don't know where to contact you.

Hello Rian / Boys - Field report 10 Gym and work are going well. LTR – 6 Years, moving to 7 years soon. We are both 29 years old. Sex life 7/10. I have come to a realisation that I have been fighting my girl for the smallest reasons for the longest time (6 years). I sometimes treat her like my enemy and I’m often on the defence, especially when I’m annoyed/angry. I think this defensiveness comes from my alcoholic step-dad. As a kid I was always anxious talking to him. I never would know what mode he was in. Yesterday I said to myself why did I ask her to be girlfriend if am always arguing with her like my enemy. Since becoming red pilled, I think I have been more on the defence by removing a lot of my beta straits. E.g. when my girl asked me to take the bins out last night, I told her I’ll take it out I’m washing up the dishes I’ll do it in a second. Old me would have just taken the bins out. This caused a little argument, which I know it would. She told her I don’t often do what she asks of me anymore, this is true. I use to jump to her command more often back then, passing all of her shit test, i never use to say no. I’m so scared of going back down the Betatization route/process, before getting married. I had a light bulb moment today. I looked at the relationship like a business. If I am hiring an employee(gf) for my business, I want that employee(gf) to always produce the best outcome and I as the owner of the company(captain) should always want the best for my employees. This morning I helped her out with no strings attached, I genuinely wanted to help her out without been so calculated. E.g. fining her passport, bank card etc as she was traveling I said to myself these things are important. Old me (meaning anything before today) would have just let her struggle finding things. In essence I’m trying to do the half foot in and out rather than treating her like my enemy and find the right balance between beta and alpha This morning we had shower sex and she mentioned “when will you take me seriously (meaning marriage), do you only want me for sex”. I response with yes and plenty of things as well). This is a response that I have stolen from a previous field report. I’m thinking of proposing to her and I do want to get married, but I just want to be as red pilled as I can before doing so and stay red pilled whilst I’m in it. I have made loads of progress within the past two years 1. I’m not scared of her emotions anymore 2. I’m not scared of saying the truth 3. Sex life hasn’t gone down / its maintained itself 4. I am shedding covert contracts all the time 5. I don’t give to receive 6. I don’t seek that much validation Things to continue working on my rage and verbal intercourse

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