Patreon, R&P Q&A #225

In Rian’s book praxeology, Emotional Pillar is the weakest of the 3. IMO at its core the pillar is spirituality (whatever it means for you). I understand all emotions as the means of communication between the subconscious and conscious. Example you get an emotion when your mental models are ineffective, because you have expectations of reality that aren’t in alignment with reality, it didn’t go the way you expected and now your upset. This is the subconscious speaking to you telling where to go digging to resolve/fix ineffective mental models, this is why memories with strong emotion attached are easy to remember. But what I am seeing now is that Autistic fucks have been around for thousands of years. Eight fold path for example, at its essence, get your instincts (subconscious operating mode) in alignment with the reality you’re in. But look at Buddhism, its riddled with misinterpretations, misunderstandings and container words. As for me I do contemporary dance, produce and perform music, paint and sculpt. Do I call/refer to myself as an artist. Fuck no, I don’t attach my identity to what I do. These are just avenues I express myself, not out of the need to be seen or validated, but because I would be doing them regardless of it paying the bills. Not “art” but self-expression is non-negotiable for me. I just got good enough at it where it pays the bills. But that’s something that Rian preaches also, how much is enough money? I have a family of 5 and we are happy off a single middle of the pack income, because we aren’t stupid with our money. Being on my RP path makes it easier to negotiate within the “Longhouse” that is the dance companies and galleries. The Machiavellian aspect really works for me when I’m surrounded by airy fairy women, homo’s and trannies. Speak to their “white messiah complex” and they will make it “their mission” to bring my vision to life. Why are you scared of being perceived as “Gay”? Its also a container word and It smells of validation seeking. The “RP space” is busted, useful only for getting you to spaces like this patreon. Where you can see people turn their lives around.

will zill

You are not ready kid! go and start fucking! then come back with an actual issue. “pissed off at myself for being in the shape I'm in and not getting laid.” Go practice pick up. Game IS the great equalizer. All your reading was pointless. Its apparent you internalized none of it from your question/problem. 2 take aways – go sarge and do pick up you have nothing to lose! Figure out why you read so much and learnt so little! Prediction - You're not going to do either, and you will make excuses or rationalize why you don’t have to.

will zill

Hi Rian, Grateful to have found your content, books recommendations, and side bar. I’ve read them all and gone through the side bar videos alongside them. Thank you. I enjoyed your cooking videos too. I’ve been lifting for 4 years, good shape. Single, spin plates. I’m interested in the part of you that’s an ‘artist’, and your thoughts for men who are artistically inclined. Becoming RP has made me rethink myself as a budding artist, and the deep emotions that come from it. I’ve found myself questioning whether poetry and films are ‘gay’ because they tap into rich emotional states. Art has always felt like a necessity for me and I now wonder whether it’s a luxury. There’s so much emphasis on making da money in the RP space, which is great but no one really chimes in on the importance of art and music. I can think of two people in the manosphere that do art professionally, Arthur Kwon Lee, and Kevin Savo. Kids are told now to go and make a YouTube channel another talking head. Instead of writing or producing a film, or making something beautiful. As a writer, painter and filmmaker, I’m very interested in writing ‘RP type content’ for future projects, so your thoughts would be appreciated.

Think I posted last week's onto the wrong Q&A - typical. Gym 3 times this week. Ran a 5k Saturday morning, played 5-a-side soccer last night. Not eaten brilliantly, need to build the consistency and keep tracking properly. The weight loss will only come with a consistent diet. Still at 211lbs as per last week, started 227lbs, aiming for 175lbs at 5'10 and trying to get to the day where I finally see my abs. 2 situations from this week. The first was during my 5k where I was about halfway round the route and had a rush of anger. I wasn't enjoying the run and was pissed off at myself for being in the shape I'm in and not getting laid. At least, that's how I rationalised it at the time and it got me to the end of the run. I guess you can experience anger if you are pissed off with yourself, it's just not because other people do something to you. It all seems oddly disconnected. Thinking about it now, it seems like I understand the "do the work, perform, deliver" side of the equation and I'm actually enjoying the incremental success, it just seems odd. I don't really seem to truly visualise the end state. I push forward on the basis that opportunities will arise from the work and, although I can't comprehend them yet, the work will put in the right positions to get them and exploit them. Much like with work where I recently got promoted, I couldn't have visualised me achieving that properly a year ago when I was drunkenly sobbing to my boss at a work event. Fortunately, he had my back and the work over the past year has got me to here. I take it that the physical work and the "eventually finally getting laid" side of things will follow a similar pathway. Work, create opportunities, learn and improve and keep at it. The second is a family "drama", as I don't have a girl but my mum and sister give me enough shitty behaviour to practice on. I live in a different city to my mum and sister and so called my mum on my lunch break the other day to wish her happy birthday. I'd sent a bouquet of flowers to the house on the day and taken her out to a show for her birthday just over a month ago. My mum is pretty unwell, been in hospital a couple of times recently but neither her or my sister had said anything. I'd recently been on holiday with my father and I joked that my sister wasn't talking to me because of that. My sister despises my dad due to various alleged and unproven allegations of emotional and physical abuse/neglect. In my view, I want a relationship with all 3 of them and the persistent politics and squabbling is tiresome and unnecessary. Anyway, my mum gives me a whole spiel of how my sister is angry because my father has found out that my sister has been coming to watch soccer games with me, because when I bought tickets last summer I used her old account which was linked to one of his email addresses (it was set up when she was a kid). I didn't realise it was still linked till after I bought the tickets. I took the view that if my dad had an issue, I'd tell him how it was and that was that. He did ask about it, I said I was going to games with my sister and that was all there was to it. My sister is angry and now won't speak to me because I've "brought back all of her trauma" and broken her trust. The only meaningful contribution I had to the conversation with my mum was to confirm it wasn't intentional and commenting that my sister is now an adult, that nobody can go through life thinking they can hide from someone else entirely and that her stance also has consequences. (By meaningful, I meant apart from "yeah..." "...mmm" whilst listening to my mum, I barely got a word in edgeways). My mum obviously went team girl, defended and excused my sister and said that hopefully I could get in touch with her gently, explain how I'd been stupid and not malicious and start to win my sister's trust back. My view is that the incident is completely trivial, my sister needs to grow up as an adult and if she's truly to heal her traumas then she can't keep running away from them (I didn't say that naturally, I STFU and just said I had to go back to work and would think about it). I don't think I've done anything wrong, I don't feel the need to apologise and think this is completely ludicrous to be honest. I don't feel the need to fix her, but equally I don't feel the need to indulge behaviour I find completely unnecessary and unhelpful to our relationship and my life. It's not worth my efforts to placate when I know her nature and know it won't change much. My issue is that I don't see why my relationship with any of the 3 needs to be blown up either. So I've posted all of the above to get the wisdom of more experienced blokes on how to navigate keeping things steady without them blowing up. I want access to my mum because she's poorly and I don't think my sister should have the right to blow everything up.. Nonetheless, I understand my sister has had a really difficult time growing up but I think we really need to get past all this, it doesn't help anyone. I'm not trying to speak to her as if she's a man, I understand it needs to handled differently but I don't have the experience (not having dated) so I'm interested to see how you guys would handle this sort of thing. For now, I'm leaving them be and I'll take it as is, I don't think I have a tool to hand that wouldn't be DEERing and apologising, and I don't want to do that anymore especially when in my view, I've done nothing wrong. Reading: I've read Glover 3 times, Manuel Smith twice, Fuccfiles & Praxeology twice, Rational Male: Preventive Medicine and The Unplugged Alpha (just so you know what material I've already been through).