Early update for September 13, 2024
Added 2024-09-12 03:55:00 +0000 UTCoh no it's in the saliva
Comments
ok now that THIS is revealed as his reason, i am fully on board with them fucking asap, so Joe can realize there is still something there afterwards and get over himself
Gale Tazzin
2024-09-12 17:53:20 +0000 UTCShe didn't say he *is* a fundie; she said he's *talking like one*. Because he is. This kind of thinking is associated with religious fundamentalists and really nobody else these days. And of course she knows he *isn't* a fundie; so, as Joyce used to be, she's assuming he caught these ideas from her. She's probably wrong - it's the weird form his child-of-divorce trauma takes, with just a soupcon of classic Madonna-Whore-Complex, verbalised in a form that most people have heard in passing, with maybe a special credit to Liz for planting the idea in his brain - but Roz isn't being crazy here.
Phil_M
2024-09-12 17:14:20 +0000 UTCHow it could be fundie talk? Joe is or was not even christian. Kind Roz is doing good but this talk isn't making so much sense...
Amós Batista
2024-09-12 17:03:13 +0000 UTCMan imagine if he had this conversation with Dorothy lmao
Sajuuk-Khar
2024-09-12 13:35:32 +0000 UTCMaybe this God wants a woman to be Joyce’s first, and Joe is worried about that possibility.
Andrea Andrew
2024-09-12 12:42:55 +0000 UTCOkay, so Joe has a raging case of Madonna-Whore Complex. My response here would be "Stop thinking about some weird kind of destiny. Even if there is a god, I doubt that they're sitting there going 'I'll assign his dude to Joyce to provide her with her First Time, and if that pesky free will leads to her shagging someone else first, I'll do awful things to her.' Just let her do what she clearly wants to do, when she wants to do it. You’re not taking anything away from her, you’re giving her something. Hopefully a good time. You're supposed to be good at that." But what do I know?
Phil_M
2024-09-12 12:14:29 +0000 UTCBut if he continues refusing Joyce, she'll just be hurt that way. Might as well stop over-thinking things...
Phil_M
2024-09-12 12:04:24 +0000 UTCHe didn't say that he was only attracted to innocence in general - that would obviously be nonsense. The implication here is that he fears that he's only attracted to *Joyce* for *her* innocence. Which still sounds like nonsense, because Joyce is coded as quite attractive enough. *But* - previously, Joe's next action after getting a woman into bed was generally to move onto the next woman. His main interest in any woman was the challenge of getting her into bed; that done, he wouldn't stick around just because she was cute or nice. So it's not 100% crazy of him to fear that he's still running on that instinct; Joyce proved especially challenging, so he became especially interested, but succeeding with her might conceivably cause the old habits to kick in. Now, he clearly likes and respects Joyce too much to just dump her the morning after, but it's not impossible that the relationship would collapse into disinterest rather soon after. So the correct response here is probably "Do you really distrust your own feelings that badly? Because you seem to respect Joyce just fine." And the better response is, frankly, "So you're taking a risk. So is Joyce in trusting you. Life isn't about certainty. It's sweet of you to try and minimise the risk to Joyce, but you'll just end up hurting her by trying not to hurt her, so you might as well live for the day."
Phil_M
2024-09-12 12:03:01 +0000 UTCIt takes all kinds to make a world, and the sort of guy that Joe is describing definitely exists. They may be playing out their version of purity culture from another direction, but that doesn't make them any less real. That said, it is HILARIOUS for JOE to label himself as "only attracted to innocence"...and especially to do it in front of the person who would be exhibit A in disproving that accusation. Did Joe once talk zestfully about the prospect of "breaking Joyce in"? Sure. Did Joe submit to a pair of handcuffs and let a sophisticated older woman have her way with him? Also yes.
T Campbell
2024-09-12 09:51:30 +0000 UTCRoz is right that the purity culture part of Joe's worries is bullshit. But if Joe is really worried that he'll lose interest after having sex with her, that's a valid thing to be worried about, because that would hurt Joyce. She'd recover and heal, but he cares about her and doesn't want to do that to her. It certainly seems to me like his interest in Joyce goes way deeper than what her body can offer him, but this is the first time he's been in love, so it's reasonable that he doesn't feel confident about how his feelings will evolve over time. If he's able, it would be good for him to voice this worry to Joyce (editing out the purity culture part, and focusing on the not wanting to hurt her part). She believes in him and will probably be totally unfazed, and then they could talk through it together.
Lisa
2024-09-12 07:06:10 +0000 UTCOh, that's a way better term, I oughta add that to my vernacular
E Lyons
2024-09-12 06:05:30 +0000 UTCGood on Roz for getting straight to the point
Bagge
2024-09-12 05:15:44 +0000 UTCHAHAHAHAHAHAH, but also, Spot ON
Onyx
2024-09-12 04:58:31 +0000 UTCThis is why I prefer the term "sexual debut" or "first time" rather than "losing" or "taking" virginities. It's not the loss of anything, you're just learning and growing and having new experiences.
Girlycore
2024-09-12 04:57:48 +0000 UTCJoe: No sis it is DIFFERENT sis it is because of my self-loathing and childhood divorce Circumstances sis it’s DIFFERENT trust me
Sajuuk-Khar
2024-09-12 04:48:39 +0000 UTC
