This elf is NOT insane, Chapter 6 - A cute goblin (part 2)

“So…” the goblin in front of me glared at me with crossed arms. “You were constantly stealing, pranking, and otherwise disrupting the peace of the other elves on top of having the red hair, which is supposedly a bad omen.”

“W-well… I wouldn’t exactly call it disrupting the peace.”

“And then one day --” she continued, ignoring my attempt at an excuse. “-- you just spirited away the statue of their guardian hero, which someone must have seen you do. Something, a potential world-destroying menace could and would do without a problem.”

“Nooo! Chad totally wanted to come with me! Right, Chad?”

The stony man next to me kept his silence.

She let out a sigh, looking at me with pity.

Welp, there went my good first impression. I couldn’t help but fidget under her gaze. I felt like I was being scolded by a parent.

“You know… To be fair, you don’t strike me as a person who would one day end the world --”

Yay!

“-- on purpose.”

Wait, what?

“However, I imagine with your yolo attitude, you would just randomly press the big red button to blow up the planet, just because you were curious about what it did.”

“Uhm…”

For some reason, I couldn’t even come up with a rebuttal to that.

The goblin noticed my expression and let out yet another sigh.

“Well, when I was reborn as a goblin, I wouldn’t have imagined I would one day be a hero who saved the world from destruction.” She palmed her face. “But here we are, I guess.”

Wait, why had she already decided that I was fated to destroy the world?!

“So, rule number one: Don’t ever touch that thing.” She pointed at the crystal in the middle of the room. “I have no idea what it is or what it’s supposed to do, but… something tells me you touching it can only result in bad things.”

Suddenly, I had an overwhelming urge to touch the crystal.

“Fei?” she asked, stretching out the word, frowning in my direction.

“Uh, yeah. Okay.”

Her frown deepened.

“Rule number two: Don’t steal random stuff with your ability just because you feel like it!”

What?! I’d never stolen anything! I just got thrown out of the village before I could return it!

As if sensing my internal complaints, her expression turned even sterner.

“Okay, okay! I won’t!” I raised my hands in surrender.

“Good. Now for the last rule--” I tensed up, expecting something even more damning than the other two. “-- Don’t randomly blast things with magic.”

“Huh?” That took me by surprise. Mostly because rather than being difficult to follow, it was impossible for me to break that rule.

“What?”

“I… uh… can’t really use magic, you know?”

“Wait, what? But you’re an elf! Elves and magic go together like bread and butter!” Her expression darkened. “I’ve seen elves use magic.”

I felt like there was a story behind that as well.

“Welp, I just got really unlucky! This fair and innocent maiden was reborn with pretty much zero mana capacity. So no magic blasting from me!” I grinned and shrugged, as if winning an argument somehow.

“... seriously?” She seemed baffled.

“Yup.” I decided to show her. “Observe! I shall unleash the entirety of my mana pool into a mighty fireball!” I pointed a finger at her.

She jumped, expecting to be incinerated. Only for a little fart of a spark to jump from my finger and immediately dissipate in the air. Eyes wide open, she watched the spot where the mighty fireball disappeared for a second before recovering.

“You are serious,” she said. “Even my magic is more powerful than yours.”

“What? You can use magic?”

Instead of answering, she raised her hand palm up, and a small ball of blue matter appeared in her hand. Unlike my mighty fireball, her light show didn’t instantly dissipate.

“Goblins aren’t exactly great at magic… and they aren’t great teachers either. So this is the most I could learn on my own.”

Damn. Self-taught.

“Wait!” I stood up, my jealousy instantly being replaced by excitement as I realized something.

“I could teach you more! I was taught magic!”

Only up until they’d found out I had no mana and started being jealous of my hair though.

“Huh…?” Her eyes widened once again as the mana ball in her palm vanished.

“I couldn’t use it myself, but I crammed all the techniques and methods for using magic, so you can use them! We are the perfect team!”

I extended my hand toward her for a handshake, hoping she’d already forgotten about our earlier discussion.

“Hmm…” She thought for a second. “That would be great, actually.” And then she smiled.

Dang, so she had the ability to smile! And it was one beautiful smile!

“Alright. It was getting pretty lonely to be honest, so I won’t say no to a companion --”

Yay!

“-- no matter how weird you are.”

Hey!

“I need to keep an eye on you just in case you are the anti-chosen one, anyway.” She shrugged.  “Also, the rules still stand. Including the third one if you somehow find a way to increase your mana capacity.”

Aww, man… She hadn’t forgotten.

The goblin stepped forward and shook my hand.

I imagined a little text saying ‘A goblin girl joined the party!’, which made me realize that I still hadn’t asked her name.

“So… I forgot to ask. What’s your name?”

She stopped for a second, before looking away, a frown appearing on her face.

“I don’t have one.”

“Wait, what? Goblins don’t have names?”

“They do… I just really hate the one they gave me. And… you know. They also made me leave, so fuck them, and their names.”

Oh, whoa, she could swear too!

“I want a fresh start. With a new name. Just didn’t figure out what kind of name yet…”

“Oooh! Can I give you a name? How abouuut, Willow?”

She flinched, a slight tint of red appeared on her cheeks. “What? No! Don’t give me a name! I’ll come up with a name myself!”

“Aww… okay. So what should I call you then?”

“I… uhm…” She frowned and looked to the side while pursing her lips. Even her thinking face was pretty cute.

“I… need more time to decide on my name,” she finally said. “I mean, you can call me whatever you want till then.”

“Okay then, Willow!”

“Ugh… yeah, okay.”

“Or should I call you something else…?” I asked, trying to be considerate.

“I mean… It's fine. I just… never mind! Like I said, call me whatever you want!”

What an odd reaction. I had the impression of her feeling guilty for being called Willow rather than actively disliking it, though. I wondered what the story behind that was.

“Alright!” I grinned. “And thus the unstoppable duo of Fei and Willow was born!” I raised my arms theatrically.

The goblin rolled her eyes on the surface, but a small smile still found its way onto her face. “Yeah yeah, an insane elf joins the party. What a doozy.”

“Hey!” I pointed at myself. “This elf is not insane!”

Despite my protests, I was smiling inside.