Episode 29 - Dick on World Peace
Added 2016-12-20 18:00:06 +0000 UTCMy Life Coach ruins my Christmas party, a SECRET SKETCH from Sam Hyde, the Jerk-Off Time Warp, the drive to pee outside, thinking like a hot chick, crossing guards, lady-dentists and why they are out to get you, Tequila, how to ruin a Ted Talk, Charity Regret, eliminating all prisons, The Apple Society and The Unix Society, and Sean gets a raise; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!
Comments
Yo dick, regarding what you said about all those 10 minute videos explaining how to do shit--I recommend observing Wadsworth's Constant: a theory that the first 30% of every video is completely useless. It absolutely applies to every instructional video, and there's even chrome plugins to make it automatically start the videos you watch 30% in.
The Golden Witch
2016-12-29 04:16:41 +0000 UTCThat's a good idea. I have a hard enough time trying to remember clips to pull for the YouTube channel. <a href="http://youtube.com/c/TheDickShow" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">http://youtube.com/c/TheDickShow</a>
Dick Masterson
2016-12-22 22:10:57 +0000 UTCDick, next time for each episode you might want to put up a list of timestamps of notable moments. It helps to revisit specific classic moments on repeated viewings :)
Ali
2016-12-22 16:28:26 +0000 UTCIs Larry wearing a barber's cape?
2016-12-22 13:26:32 +0000 UTCGreat fucking episode, and the Patreoni count just keeps climbing. Brings a tear to my eye.
Non-Toxic Glue
2016-12-22 07:02:22 +0000 UTCI give it six months.
Dick Masterson
2016-12-22 00:30:12 +0000 UTCIt is a fucking joke. Does the mobile version of the site work for you at least?
Dick Masterson
2016-12-21 18:43:55 +0000 UTCVideo is not working in the Patreon app (iPad). This app really sucks.
Tim the Enchanter
2016-12-21 18:00:41 +0000 UTCDick, you need to assemble a page on dick.show that acts as a web ring for all the other podcasts that have started in the wake of your show's success. Larry was right that you've successfully created a network without even trying and advertising that fact would be really scathing to anyone who has made an actual conscious effort to do the same thing only to fail miserably. I mean, you'd have to be a real loser to put together an in-depth action plan for a "podcast network" by dismantling your prior success only to have your sponsors pull support when your cringe-worthy awful podcasts fail to gain traction. The only thing worse would be to lay the task of creating good shows at the feet of your listeners when you come to the sad realization that you're an unfunny douche who's previous success in the realm of internet radio could be attributed to the co-host that he unceremoniously dropped like a sack of potatoes in favor of a diet rc cola ripoff with a stupid internet handle.
2016-12-21 17:41:20 +0000 UTCCheck out asterios's patreon. OR Dick.Show, you know, the show's website?
Colorless Green Void
2016-12-21 06:10:30 +0000 UTCOMFG. Before Shtaun even said it, I thought of the guy in Unforgiven getting blown away and how he could have used a shitter gun. Shtaun is KEK
2016-12-21 02:53:02 +0000 UTCIs there a page where I can listen to all the Asterios bits from the show?
2016-12-21 02:24:53 +0000 UTCI think Sam's not-particularly-well-articulated rage is spot on. We have a for-profit prison systems where private contractors have been able to sue cities whose prison population didn't meet the estimated quantities in the city's solicitations. This poses a problem on cost contracts because the private contractors are making a profit off the head count. If there are no heads, that's less cost, and less profit. This incentivized the system to lock up low-level or non-violent offenders. They need to put in place firm fixed price contracts where the state has to pay whether the prison is full or empty. This becomes a problem because the state fears they will pay money for services not received. This, to me, is a better option than making a profit off of prisoners. In my past life I negotiated government contracts for a living. Not even get met started on FPI... modern day slavery.
Xocë
2016-12-21 00:28:38 +0000 UTCI think Sam Hyde is the only man more insane than Dick
2016-12-20 23:51:27 +0000 UTCMan that Sam Hyde dude is great,! Thanks for introducing me to that guy. Goddamn SJW Job Assassins are a fucking menace to a sane society. That fucking kid about prison. You think he would be all in for 2 years max if some maniacs raped his Mom for 12 hours while his Dad and siblings watched then set his family on fire while tied up and burned them alive inside the house ? Like that shit that happened to that DR. and his family up in New England a few years ago. You think he believes those savages should be "reformed". Grow up kid. The world is full of real evil. not heart of gold misfits who just like a little pot.
2016-12-20 23:45:08 +0000 UTCI am the Mexican Gallagher.
Dick Masterson
2016-12-20 22:28:44 +0000 UTCMe too, but the distance is a factor. I hope he calls in again. I love that guy.
Dick Masterson
2016-12-20 22:28:17 +0000 UTCsam is a disgrace hawhawhaw
2016-12-20 22:04:02 +0000 UTCAw, wished Sam Hyde came to the recording
punishur
2016-12-20 21:35:32 +0000 UTCSo Sean dumped Maddox' ass because he's too busy. I don't know how to feel about this. I wonder how it will affect him.
2016-12-20 19:51:21 +0000 UTCSo this episode had me curious how dude would handle Sean's announcement and for the first time in months I listened to that other podcast... shit's going downhill fast. Even Rucka could barely contain his contempt. I may have helped him get to that first million but doubt he'll reach a second mil.
Xocë
2016-12-20 18:18:15 +0000 UTC
