Genshin Impact's Incense Burner Of Liyue [589]

"Call you Dad?"

Gu Sanqiu was completely stunned. The surrounding onlookers all wore equally dumbfounded expressions.

Paimon covered her mouth. "Isn’t Sanqiu one of the gods’ kin? How’d he suddenly become the Geo Archon’s son?!"

Childe, however, seemed to suddenly get it. "No wonder you’re so freakin’ strong! So you’ve been pretending to be younger than you really are all this time, huh?!"

He thought of his own teacher, whose age was just as much a mystery. These two were probably the kind of ancient monsters who’d been alive for who-knows-how-many years!

Gu Sanqiu’s dead-fish eyes activated. "Great, then could you please tell me who my mother is?"

Zhongli still wore a warm smile—but the hand stroking Gu Sanqiu’s head began to press down harder, like he was seriously considering leaving five fingerprints on Sanqiu’s skull.

"Father."

Gu Sanqiu folded instantly, no pride whatsoever.

"Good boy. Go stand to the side now."

Zhongli shifted his hand from Gu Sanqiu’s head to his shoulder.

"Once Daddy’s done here, I’ll take you to buy some candy."

Yeah… time to skip town for a bit. Inazuma’s too far, but Mondstadt might not be a bad option.

Grab some drinks with friends, relax a little, and avoid his newly "awakened" old man and whatever weird parenting kink this was.

"Let’s finish this contract, then, Lady Rosalyne."

Zhongli placed the Gnosis into Rosalyne’s hand. "This is what we promised you. I never go back on my word."

"Thank you for your generosity and benevolence, my lord."

Rosalyne bowed respectfully to Morax. She wasn’t even the one the contract was signed with. That he showed such courtesy to her—a mere proxy, a glorified tool—was already a form of mercy.

Of course, if it weren’t for the dead-fish-eyed lunatic standing nearby, she might not have sounded quite so humble.

After what happened last time, she was honestly kind of scared. She now understood all too well that neither gods nor their kin were people she could afford to mess with.

What happened in Mondstadt had been an exception. As for the real reason… well, that was tied to things she never wanted to remember again.

Here in Liyue, Rosalyne had positioned herself correctly. She was merely an agent carrying out Her Majesty’s will, executing a contract. Liyue owed her nothing.

Pull anything reckless here, and she’d be in serious trouble.

Not to mention—Gu Sanqiu was getting stronger by the day. Even if she let loose the madness burning inside her, the chances of beating—or even surviving—a fight with him were slimmer than ever.

"Very well. The contract is complete."

As Zhongli spoke those words, the tension in his face seemed to ease.

Paimon flew over curiously. "Hey, hey, Zhongli! What was actually in the contract? Can’t you tell us? Pretty please?"

"Confidentiality is part of the agreement. Break it, and the punishment shall be the Wrath of Stone."

Zhongli cast a quick glance at Gu Sanqiu.

Who, of course, understood perfectly and grabbed Paimon, shoving her into Aether’s arms. Let the blonde hold her for a bit.

"Hey!"

Aether quickly tried to calm her down. "They’re discussing important stuff right now. Let’s not interrupt, okay?"

He gently patted her back, and Paimon’s cheeks instantly flushed. With a soft humph, she wrapped her arms around Aether’s neck, too lazy to float anymore, just snuggling into his embrace.

Hmph! I’ll let Sanqiu off this time—for Aether’s sake!

Gu Sanqiu glanced at Aether, then at the red-faced Paimon.

Interesting.

Too bad Paimon didn’t quite meet the age requirement. Just an expired loli at this point. Otherwise, he might’ve been very interested in tossing the blonde into a Liyue jail cell.

Minimum sentence? Three years.

Then he’d broadcast it across all of Teyvat: Want your brother back? Want the truth? Come to Liyue—I’ve left everything here!

If Lumine dared show up, he’d rally every adeptus and start a brawl. Had to straighten her out somehow. Worst case? Tie her up and ship her off to Inazuma.

Come on, you shut-in goddess who can’t even cook and just remote-controls things from her inner sanctum! Fight me face-to-face if you’ve got the guts!

Middle finger.

And when Dream-Slicing One-Hit comes flying down? He’d lift Lumine up and use her as a meat shield. Let Teyvat’s best electro-therapist knock some sense into her.

While Gu Sanqiu was busy imagining all sorts of nonsense, his old man was already dropping his divine name into the void, marking the true end of the incident.

"As for the remaining matters, I trust you’ll ensure the terms of the contract are properly upheld."

Zhongli turned and left the Northland Bank. "Come, my good child. Your father shall take you to buy some candy."

Gu Sanqiu wore a look like he was severely constipated. Why does it feel like the old man’s harder to handle than Hu Tao now?

Wasn’t the original pecking order: Hu Tao beats Zhongli, Zhongli beats me, and I beat Hu Tao? A perfect triangle of mutual checks and balances. If Zhongli tried to scold him, he could just let Hu Tao at him.

But now? Somehow he’d dropped to the bottom of the food chain without noticing.

Maybe I should just fly to Mondstadt now. Forget the celebration. Forget showing off. I’m out.

What do I do if the old man’s actually starting to enjoy this?!

The Osial incident was wrapped, Childe had squeezed ahead of him to become Wallet No. 1… This should’ve been twice the happiness, so why did it feel so wrong?

Truth be told, Gu Sanqiu had never imagined this would be what life was like after the old man’s identity got revealed. It was galaxies away from anything he’d expected.

Trailing behind Zhongli, flanked by Paimon and the ever-reluctant Aether (who was only here because Paimon begged him), Gu Sanqiu trudged along.

And then, Zhongli actually bought him sugar art.

With the craftsmanship honed through years of leisurely earthly wandering, Zhongli spun a massive "True Dragon Form" candy sculpture with ease—so large that a single skewer couldn't even hold it up properly.

"Eat. This is your reward."

Gu Sanqiu rolled his eyes. "I was hoping for something a bit more… normal."

"When a gift is offered by an elder, one must never refuse. Understand, child?"

Zhongli solemnly pressed his five fingers against Gu Sanqiu’s head. "This is something your father specially made for you. If you don’t finish it, it would be an insult to my hard work."

"Are you sure you wanna keep calling me that in public? Just saying—while the Ten Gold Guild controls the intel network on the black market, tabloid reporters and paparazzi aren’t part of our jurisdiction."

"I’ve finally got a couple days to rest. I really don’t wanna spend it getting grilled by a bunch of bigwigs."

"No matter. Your father has faith in you."

Zhongli nodded. "To be honest, you’re now one of the most powerful figures in all of Liyue. No one would dare use this against you. Doing so would be suicide."

"You really do believe in me, huh."

Gu Sanqiu felt like crying. What ‘never refuse a gift from an elder’ crap is this?! That hand on my head clearly means ‘refuse and I’ll give you five extra holes’!

Who in their right mind would dare refuse?!

It was like a Fatui skirmisher pointing a gun at a civilian and asking, "Feel like moving?"

What’s the poor guy supposed to do? Nod?

Even if the musket doesn’t take him out, he’s getting pancaked by Thunder-Hammer Guy in the next second.

"What’s the matter, son? As a citizen of Liyue, you mustn’t waste food. Even as an adeptus, you should know the value of thrift."

Aether and Paimon had long since backed off. Paimon, happily licking her own candy art courtesy of Zhongli, was clearly watching the father-son showdown like it was peak entertainment.

Gu Sanqiu being utterly steamrolled? Now that was a rare sight!

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This is a fan translation of 原神之璃月奉香人 by 淡白蛋清. All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!