Naruto: Freeloading is Great! 2 [6]

Second day of school.

Iruka stood at the classroom door with a pounding headache. Inside, the room was as noisy as a vegetable market. Just recalling yesterday’s “dream speeches” from that bunch of brats made his temples ache.

Chōji: “My dream is to become a gourmet and eat every kind of food in the world.”

Shikamaru: “Dreams, huh… ah, such a drag. Fine then, maybe get a capable wife to handle everything for me. If she can even help me eat and go to the bathroom, that’d be best. If not, I won’t force it.”

Hoshino: “Tch~ he actually didn’t say no… Same dream as him, done!”

Kiba: “Hmph! Dreams are meaningless to me, the Evil Wind King! Mortals, do not obstruct me as I safeguard world peace!”

…And other such bizarre ambitions.

“Ahhhhhh…! What the hell is wrong with this year’s students!? Why is it that the only dream remotely tied to the ninja profession is that demon fox brat wanting to become Hokage? If you don’t even want to be shinobi, why enroll in the academy!?”

Iruka couldn’t stop himself from shouting it out loud. Only after venting did he slide the door open with a shua and step inside.

“Class… good morning… Now, can someone explain to me why there are sandbags in the classroom?”

“Because building muscles requires daily training. Sensei, how can you not know that? Are you even a real man?”

“…Then what about the rice cooker?”

“Because my dad said classes consume a lot of energy, so I brought our rice cooker, along with a bag of rice.”

“Sakura, Chōji… go stand in the hall.”

“Why!?” ×2

Seeing Gorilla Sakura’s and Chōji’s indignant faces, Iruka nearly exploded. He reached into the pouch at his leg, pulled out a kunai, and said pleasantly:

“Because I’m a chūnin. And you’re not even genin.”

“Sensei, are you… threatening us?” ×2

“Yes. So? You don’t accept it?”

“W-we accept…” ×2

With Chōji wearing a rice cooker on his head and Gorilla Sakura clutching a sandbag, frozen in despair out in the hall, Iruka finally began his lecture to the kids.

Then came the smell of rice wafting in, accompanied by bam bam bam as sandbags were struck…

“You two don’t even know what standing punishment means!!!?”

As Iruka stormed out of the classroom with rage on his face, Hoshino poked Sasuke.

“Oi, Walking Wallet, can you do me a favor?”

“What favor?”

“This.”

Hoshino pulled a pillow out of his desk drawer, one he’d brought from home, and displayed it.

“When I fall asleep later, if Iruka asks, just say you brought it. I don’t want to get punished.”

“…Why would you knowingly bring something that’ll get you punished!? Confiscated!”

Like hell she could agree to this. Hoshino was already hopelessly lazy—if she didn’t supervise him strictly and instead indulged him, he’d never graduate from this academy even in death.

Sasuke, fuming, snatched away Hoshino’s pillow—only to notice Naruto sitting nearby, sweating nervously. Oi, oi, oi, what are you two even thinking…

“Naruto.”

“Yes!”

“Hand over your pillow too.”

“I-I didn’t bring a pillow…”

“You didn’t? Then why do you look so guilty?”

“Because, because…”

Naruto fumbled for ages without giving an answer. Sasuke’s patience snapped. She stood up and leaned over to check Naruto’s drawer herself.

Good. Naruto hadn’t lied—she hadn’t brought a pillow. What she had brought was…

“…Why the hell did you bring a blanket to class!? Hoshino being trash is one thing, but you—why would you sink to his level!?”

“Because sleeping on the desk makes you catch cold, and if you get sick your nose won’t stop running, it’s miserable.”

“No sleeping in class! Blanket's confiscated too!”

“Eh—!”

“Don’t whine. Or do you actually want to turn into a useless bum like Hoshino?”

“N-no! I’ll never ever become useless like Hoshino, who’s hopeless at everything! I won’t sleep! As long as I don’t become a failure like him, I’ll do anything!”

Sasuke was satisfied with Naruto’s answer. But someone else couldn’t stand being used as a negative example anymore.

“Oi! You two sure have a lot of opinions about me, huh? Keep talking, I don’t mind playing some Mortal Kombat with you!”

Just as Hoshino was about to blow a gasket, Iruka came back—having already beaten Gorilla Sakura and Chōji half-dead in the hall. He immediately slapped a punishment on Hoshino for daring to bark at Uchiha Sasuke.

“Hoshino, you go stand in the hall too!”

“…You’re not even going to ask for a reason?”

“What reason? You dared shout at our noble Sasuke—what more reason do I need?”

“I… I… fuck!”

Seeing how brazenly Iruka flaunted his favoritism, Hoshino finally admitted defeat with this shitty school. To avoid ending up like Chōji and Gorilla Sakura, he obediently trudged out into the hall—waved off by the beaming smiles of Naruto and Sasuke.

Damn it, never thought there’d come a day I got sold out by the Walking Wallet too.

And wouldn’t you know it—maybe Gorilla Sakura’s body was just too well-trained. The moment she saw Hoshino coming out for punishment, she bounced right back up, threw her arms wide, and pulled him into a massive hug.

“Brother! Truly worthy of being my good brother who shares hardships! The moment you saw me punished, you followed right after! From you, I see the indomitable spirit of a real man!”

“…Heh.”

Not that it was anything like what Gorilla Sakura imagined, but whatever. Best to just let it slide. After all, good will—especially a girl’s good will—is never too much to have.

Speaking of girls, Hoshino was baffled about Sakura, who looked every bit like a guy. How the hell did this one end up becoming a muscle-brained gorilla?

“Sakura, why do you want so badly to be a ‘real man’ anyway?”

“This is a long story… It was about three months ago, in winter. That day, I was walking home after buying soy sauce for my mom, like usual. Then, out of nowhere, an uncle jumped out and said to me: ‘Found you, my diligent disciple!’”

Hoshino instantly had a very, very bad feeling.

Sakura’s words made him recall what he had said when he first encountered Guy’s so-called “Massage Divine Technique”…

My diligent disciple, you still haven’t told your master your name.

Uh… name, huh… this… this, this… ah, got it! Master, my name is Sakura, Haruno Sakura!

Back then, there really hadn’t been any choice!

The situation was so dire—he needed a real, same-aged name he could remember. And crucially, one without a big-name clan behind it, or Guy would’ve seen right through him. That left only Haruno Sakura, a civilian kid with no prestigious background.

He’d only intended to borrow her name to stall Guy, to buy time before he got found out. He never imagined…

“I’m sorry! I really am so, so sorry I dragged you into this!”

“Huh? Brother, why are you suddenly apologizing to me?”

“Anyway—please accept my apology! I truly never meant to ruin your life like this!”

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This is a fan translation of 火影之软饭真好吃 by 肾亏能力者 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!