Will be away next 2 weeks. Please give me extra time to send links.

Hi everyone. It's hard for me to talk or do anything right now so please bear with me. I am pushing myself as nothing will get done if I don't and I don't have anyone really irl.

My little sister, and last remaining blood relative committed suicide 2 days ago, and yesterday couldn't be resuscitated. I am going through more than I can handle right now due to having to move, only having enough to cover rent and bond for new place while now having to get a loan to travel back to NZ for her funeral which I still know nothing on as we didn't keep in touch much and I am still trying to find out who is organizing what so I can find the dates to return to.

I will be alright, I just need time to myself but I will still send links and such out asap when I can but they might be a day late as I will be travelling. I have someone covering dmca and all that stuff while I am away but I need to focus on finding help to move if I am away when it happens.

I will still be getting images and stuff made for next month as usual as I need stuff to distract my mind. And I always have my policy of please only sub if you feel you are getting something you feel for your moneys worth. So please do not feel bad if you want to unsub as I understand the pressure of everything in the world happening right now.

I've always been alone and constantly though hardship my whole life, so I'm not one to talk things out or hold onto things as it's never helped. This is why some of you don't understand why I go off at bullies and idiots and why they never fazed or bothered me. And why people who are so used to hate online instantly label me as someone to dislike because of the attitude I show online, think I'm opinionated, or that I don't listen to feedback. I can take the abuse from bullies and others as I never take it on, and I'd rather it was put on me instead of someone else who can't or did not deserve it. In our community there is a lot because so many treat it as just adult content, and as if people don't have feelings or matter. This is why I try to make it better so people don't have to suffer needlessly, and for others who do it, start regretting everything when they get older. It is also why I don't charge things individually as I want people to enjoy stuff in the hopes that it makes their day or lives better, as I know what it's like to suffer alone constantly in darkness in situations that are normally out of your control.

Be the change the change you want to happen in this world. On your deathbed, make sure you don't have any regrets. The world will try to stop you, all it takes usually is for someone to say 'no' and people will stop their dreams. Right now, I've realized from her suicide video that she needed me for the past 10 years. And me not being there for my little sister in time as I had thought I had a few more years to try go back and scatter mums ashes with her and try be a family again is something else that will haunt me for the rest of my life. To those that knew, thank you for your condolences and I'm sorry I can't get back to all of you as it is really hard right now to type with everything I have to do now.

I will send links etc when I can as usual. And I will be working on Tsumi next month as usual when I am back.