December Update: Year In Review
Added 2021-01-08 01:24:21 +0000 UTCHey team.
Let's Get This Out Of The Way
You'll have noticed I didn't do a video in December. I made a conscious choice that I was going to prioritize enjoying my holiday, and also do work, but only inasmuch as it does not conflict with that enjoyment. I knew there was a risk that the video wouldn't be done, and I'd be apologizing to y'all for the third month in a row, but I decided, you know what? It may cost me money not to release in December, but if I come into 2021 not burnt out for once, it'll be money well-spent.
I hope you all managed some degree of rest this past month as well.
Looking in the Rearview
As you may know, I have an early January birthday, so I get extra reflective this time of year.
You don't need me to tell you, 2020 was a shitshow, but, in a bizarre way... for me, personally, it was less so than 2019. The world went to hell, but my own, personal life sucked a bit less. This is largely to do with personal things that made 2019 particularly terrible and other personal things that alleviated the nightmare that was 2020, which I'll keep to myself.
But, for all the times I've apologized to you for not having a video for you... I actually released 10 videos in 2020! Which is 2 more than I did in 2019. Had I gotten this thing I'm doing now out in time, I would've only missed (the equivalent) of one month, and, given I spent one month sick with COVID, I think that's pretty reasonable.
Granted, the hope for this year was to make up some of my video debt from years previous, but I hope you won't hold it against me that I abandoned that goal around March.
I have a number of frustrations. I don't like that I have only released one Alt-Right Playbook since 2019. I don't like that Protagony stalled after a single video. At the same time, I wouldn't call these regrets. They're just... annoying realities. I made what I felt able to make this year. And, not for nothing... I kind of loved doing it? The stuff I made this year rekindled some of my love for YouTubing. Grabbing subjects and running in weird directions with them felt like my first years, before I was "a BreadTuber," except the range of subjects was so much wider and weirder.
I also learned, somewhat happily, that I won't become destitute if I stop making The Alt-Right Playbook. CO-VIDs brought in a fraction of the views, but nevertheless steadily pulled in patrons. The only point where my income took a downward turn is when I didn't put anything out for a couple months in a row. The Alt-Right Playbook is my most popular project, and, by this time next year, it will theoretically be complete. (Yes, I know saying that is tempting fate.) So it's nice knowing I could still have a career after that.
Looking Through the Windshield
I've got one CO-VID still to make and then it's time to jump back into ARP. I don't know if the CO-VIDs are done, as I've got plenty of topics I could still tackle, but I'm itching to get back to the big stuff. I have a clear idea where I'm headed, and have bits and pieces of scripts I've put together over the last few months.
Once TARP is finished, I want to take some time off to pursue passion projects. And, after a little of that, it'll be time for some new series. Maybe it'll be that history of the adventure game, maybe it'll be that series on leftist revolutions, maybe it'll be more Protagony. Likely a mix of all three. And perhaps some weird shit thrown in here and there when I get the itch.
And maybe I'll look back at this post next year and think "that was naive of me." That tends to be the case. But I've never regretted starting a year with enthusiasm!
The General Crisis
I would feel irresponsible if I didn't mention the goings on in the last few days. For my birthday, I got the greatest gift of all: a Senate majority. Then the next day there was a coup attempt. As of this moment, Trump is officially conceding the Presidency. The Republican Party is possibly about to tear itself apart as it tries to disassociate from Trump, or possibly it's about to fully embrace fascism. The Democrats are possibly about to rally for impeachment, disgrace the fucker in his final days, and use the momentum to stop being a wishy-washy opposition party and make the tiniest room for the young lefties to steer the party... or possibly they're about to return to their business of returning everything back to a shitty neoliberal norm because it's preferable to fascism. And what's exhilarating and also fucking terrifying is it's really hard to tell which way things are gonna go.
So, keep in mind: while it's possible Dems will just treat this like an odd kerfuffle not worth dwelling on, we are also possibly living through history. And, you know... any predictions I make for this year are subject to change. Because of all the history we might be living through.
Happy New Year!
-I
Comments
Happy birthday from a fellow Capricorn!
Kathleen Laufenberg
2021-01-13 01:31:15 +0000 UTCI'm sure most people would appreciate you not burning out, and we all appreciate your content! While I "look forward" to you finishing TARP (especially that it as been an excellent resource to share) I can't wait to see your future passion projects. Stay safe! ~ a fellow Canuck
2021-01-10 23:13:34 +0000 UTCNot burnt out is good. I endorse not-burnt-out-ness.
Jacque Marshall
2021-01-10 02:18:14 +0000 UTCI am thankful to you forever for guiding me down the right path. I contribute so you can keep being yourself and make whatever you want. I owe so much to you I'll never be able to repay it.
Sean
2021-01-09 08:16:29 +0000 UTCReally excited for more alt right playbook
a Zac from The Vanguard leftist
2021-01-08 16:59:54 +0000 UTCLiving through this bit of history has been a little too much like The Handmaid's Tale for my peace of mind. Despite the immediate vindications, we're still left with the stark reality that 47% of eligible voters wanted to re-elect Trump. That is a sobering statistic, and when combined with your insight about how for many/all of that 47%, "It's true, because I believe it," is their worldview, I don't know how we will ever close that gap, or even cross it. How can a society function, let alone improve, if nearly half the electorate is delusional? But then I think back to other societal gaps in history, like the status quo before the civil rights movement of the 50s-60s, and people must have seemed just as irredeemably delusional and divided back then. The gap may have seemed impossible to cross, but it was. That perspective keeps me from total despair.
PC Escobar
2021-01-08 16:28:15 +0000 UTCFind yourself a friend, individually add up how much it costs for you to make it to the next paycheck. Now pool whatever’s left over with whatever’s left over for your friend once they figure it out and now you both have a bigger resource to pull from for spending. Since it’s surplus your needs are always met even in the case where just one person takes all of it for one cycle. The next cycle the other person can do it and so on. This is the fundamental “from each according to their ability, to each according to their need.” that you’re looking for. Add more people and the overall pie gets bigger, seek out multiple people to make this deal with and you have redundancy consisting as a social safety net. When the money gets spent it goes up the hierarchy so they won’t notice anything’s change but in reality since the net keeps getting bigger it’ll eventually overcome capitalist production. Also with all that surplus you suddenly gained access too you can start building the conditions for distributing wealth more and more. Copy paste. Pass it on.
2021-01-08 08:04:37 +0000 UTChey ian! i started binging your videos recently on a whim (that’s not entirely true: i’m thinking about genre for my undergraduate thesis and felt inspired by your life is strange and adventure game videos) and i was thinking oh it’s been a bit since we’ve heard from ian i hope he’s ok! so i am glad to hear that you are, in fact, ok. it’s been a shitty year to try and do any work (speaking myself as a student and gig worker) so i’m glad you prioritized yourself over the holidays. hope you keep well (or as well as...you know) as whatever the fuck is gonna happen keeps happening!
Will Bower
2021-01-08 07:31:15 +0000 UTCWell, wasn't expecting to hear Trump conceded, least of all here. Good to hear you're in a better place, speaking as someone else who enjoyed 2020 personally but understands it was a bit of an apocalyptic shitshow for the world outside of myself.
SpectralTime
2021-01-08 02:19:46 +0000 UTCI'm patiently waiting for more Protagony. Watched Kentucky Route Zero again and couldn't get through it without crying a little. Thank you for a good year.
Eric Hula
2021-01-08 01:49:41 +0000 UTCKeep up the good work! I love your videos and after I read your updates and hear from your heart I love you! I'm gonna be sharing your alt-right playbook videos with friends as we fight against this kind of horribleness in our own little corners of our world. Thanks again, happy new year and happy birthday!
Jae Lim
2021-01-08 01:38:08 +0000 UTC
