Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse: 242

Title: The Kind Citizens Help With The Grind

Kai is unscrupulous in various manners, not just because of his shamelessness. Maybe he would have more scruples if he didn’t regain his emotions in a world of Shinobi and war, so he DEFINITELY had no issues grinding [Forbidden Individual Curse Tag] on the general populace of Konoha. The tag is hard to instill in the target’s heart. Still, Kai made a note of not using this seal on Shinobi of any kind, not due to fear but general understanding and acceptance that one rare genius son of a bitch could destroy everything by outing the seal. And Kai doesn’t want any issues when he is so near to burning down Hiruzen’s defiled chair and placing his own in the Hokage’s office!

A clone of his made successful contact with Sunagakure last night, and the other one bound to Iwagakure came across Yahiko’s group undergoing their Anbu Missions. Kai wished he could make it easier for Yahiko by somehow stifling his emotions for the things he has to do by acting as a bandit, but the orange-haired junior of his was surprisingly resilient—tempered. Especially because Kai’s wooden clone silently followed the group for two days, seeing how they lured an Iwa’s team by destroying a lumber village—selling the able-bodied to slavers of Land of Earth while sending the infants to Konoha’s wagon to supply the orphanage.

It’s cruel, but what can Kai do about it? Stop them? What would that achieve besides temporary solace to the civilians? It would be a lie to say he didn’t want better things for others, but it would never come at the expense of his own objectives. So, he snuck past Yahiko and planted the cursed seal on the Infants, too—not the worst thing he had to do ever since he came to this world.

It doesn’t matter if one of the infants grows into a talented Shinobi since it will take them years!

He wishes Yahiko well in his heart and moves on. It’s nostalgic. Kai remembers the day the trio called him their boss. Now? One is an accomplished Iryo-Nin, finding ways to make the chakra healthcare more mobile than professional Iryo-Shinobi trained for years! The other is bound for Honou City, the Land of Fire’s Capital. And the most ambitious of them all—Yahiko—has to do whatever it takes to rise the ranks and learn about the atrocities of the world to stop them. Not everyone can grind their way to the top like Kai.

But.

‘Fuck, no matter what I say,’ Kai thins his lips as he travels at a moderate pace, instilling a cursed seal on any kind of citizen that he chances upon—he certainly doesn’t use his sensory skills to locate every civilian in the perimeter of 5 kilometers! ‘-I can’t help but feel bad about Yahiko.’

Yahiko left to prove himself. His Anbu initiative program should end a month or two before the year’s end.

‘Yahiko works under Rat, Koga Gekko. That man should be gentler than most Anbu members. And as shitty as the situation is, Yahiko will at least understand the meaning of words he constantly recites—ending all wars.’

Kai frowns and stops before scratching his head. The Land of Earth is known for sweeping stretches of dry grassland around shared borders with other small countries, so a lone traveler like Kai stands out quite a bit.

‘At least they didn’t have the cum-men’s work on them.’ Kai sighs softly.

‘What would their lives be like if I didn’t live in this world?’ Kai questions himself. He started doing this after Kyubi’s outcry.

‘If I weren’t here, would Mito still live? What about Kushina? Kyubi should still be in the hellish seal and hate Kushina's guts, no matter her ramen-loving charm. What about Tsunade and Orochimaru? Nono? How would Mikoto cope if Yata died?’

Kai releases a long sigh.

‘Did I do more bad than good in this world?’ He shakes his head as Danzo’s mummified body in Tsunade’s prison comes to his mind. ‘Nah, I probably did this world a favor by taking out Hiruzen’s throat-buddy. He starts making his way to Iwagakure once again. But he cannot help but stop when he sees a disheveled light-blue-haired girl stumbling in the grassland with a white-furred creature in her embrace—a rabbit.

‘A survivor of some bandit attacks, probably?’ Kai frowns as he stares harder at the girl. ‘But why can’t I sense that rabbit despite seeing it?’

It’s like he met Orochimaru once she mastered her Sage Mode. He could see her with his eyes, but his senses at the time could not distinguish her Senjutsu Chakra from the natural energy surrounding the world. He feels the same way again—in his Sage Mode.

*Blink*

Kai quickly looks back as the world darkens around him for an instant before he breaks the illusion—and, alongside it—the crimson eye covering the sky with its rippled tomoe-clad pattern! His mental strength is greater than the caster of the sudden jutsu as he looks at the stumbling girl again, finding the rabbit sitting on her shoulder as she walks ahead without any knowledge.

Meanwhile, the ruby-eyed creature looks at Kai unflinchingly.

He thins his lips before walking toward the duo. Being a clone affords him the ability to check the dangers head-on. And the invasive, aggressive gaze of the tiny rabbit rings an alarm in Kai’s head. But he’s had these alarms going off whenever he sees Orochimaru in questionable attire—so he moves undeterred.

---

*Shatter*

*Splash*

A large glass tube shatters in a pristine chamber as viscous yellow liquid splatters and covers the room. A tall, dark figure falls on the floor, a frame unimpeded by the glass shards as the figure’s skin breaks any glass fragment under the man’s wet body into smaller pieces! Ash-blonde hair sticks to the figure’s body. The sound of rough pants fills the room as the figure snarls.

“Who are you?!” He looks up, his new eyes unable to register light as effortlessly as before. His dark skin glimmers under the slick texture of the yellow liquid, and a deep medicinal scent wafts from his body. Electricity crackles around the man when the ‘cloudy’ white figure questions, “Are you going to use your Senjutsu Infused Black Lightning?”

A stills.

“You aren’t healed. It’s impressive you sensed our arrival, but to think any less of the infamous Third Raikage would be foolishness.”

“It’s you,” A slowly pushes himself off the ground, pain coursing in his veins as he recalls flashes of genjutsu and black flames burning him. The crackling sound of crushed glass fragments replaces the moment’s silence as A calmly closes his eyes. The light is unbearable to his grafted nerve endings. He points behind the previously cloudy figure, “There is a robe and a roll of bandages behind you. Bring them to me.”

The stranger accepts the order at its face value, tossing them in A’s direction as the Raikage catches the items without needing his eyes.

The lightning bolt-shaped scar on the man’s pecs is no more as he covers himself and questions, “You’re the one who stole Kumo’s intelligence, forcing us to recall our civilian business owners. Answer me two things. Why can’t I kill you? And what purpose does fooling Kumo and Iwa into attacking Konoha serve?”

“You can call me Ura,” the stranger hums as A ties the bandage around his sensitive eyes. He never expected Yata to pack such a punch, not to mention the strangest Genjutsu! He would not have survived if not for his Black Lightning.

“Answer my questions,” A grunts. “One alarm and Kumogakure will enter a lockdown. We haven’t found your means of entering and leaving our village—but that won’t matter. I see you now.”

Quite ironic given the bandages around Raikage’s eyes, but Ura does not challenge the man’s claims and mutters, “I told you I’m enough. What was the point of dragging all of us with you?”

The Raikage frowns as he realizes Ura is talking to someone else, someone who he cannot sense.

A deep voice fills the once-sealed medical ward, “You cannot kill us? No. What you cannot do is disobey us—an unsubtle rule to your seal to hint your condition readily as a way of my respect. I don’t recall Amaterasu leaving survivors. You did well.”

The quiet authority in the deep and unquestionably ancient voice presses into A’s chest as he frowns. He noticed the second he couldn’t move his body with the intent to harm the intruder, but if the point was to make him realize someone tampered with his body, then the other party certainly succeeded.

Questions like—Who are you? What is your goal?—Didn’t need any thinking as A rakes his brain to disappear. But he cannot. Something stops him—he doesn’t know what. But he cannot leave until excused.

“He would have realized something just as quickly as Sakumo if you gave him some time,” Ura drawls as he leans against the wall.

‘Sakumo Hatake?’ A frowns. His son ambushed the White Fang based on the information sent by this mysterious party, and the troublesome opponent lives!

“Only a seal works in this manner, falling in the category of a Cursed Seal. Speak,” A accepts the passive role for the time being. “What is it that you want?”

“You questioned two things from us,” the deep voice replies slowly. “You now know why you cannot disobey us. But what purpose does encouraging this raid serve? What purpose does any war serve? I have an objective that you will empathize with and share soon enough—and war is needed to sow the seeds of chaos. But that is not all. Why could you not assassinate Yata as we led you to achieve?”

The Raikage feels a slight chill run down his spine as he realizes the mysterious entity manipulated his actions through different sources of information. This mysterious entity carefully evaluated Kumogakure’s strengths, what A is willing to use, and how!

“Why does Konoha show signs of growth when a certain paranoid Shinobi on the path of Hatred carved none other by the Second Hokage should have led them to their downfall?” The deep voice continues.

“Why are the Three Sannins breathing? How could Tsunade Senju, Jiraiya, and Orochimaru achieve Sage Modes? Why does the Uchiha Clan shows signs of calm and courtesy so long after the Second War when their eager blood should be craving more?”

“Why did Tsunade Senju suddenly adopt three war orphans?” The deep voice almost growls seethingly.

“Konoha is showing an unsettling trend of change—a change which I tried preventing over the years. And in the center of all the changes, indirectly at least, lays one man.”

A frowns. The Raikage realizes the mysterious party left out one key individual whose existence played a crucial role for Konoha during the raid.

“The Dragon Sennin,” A mutters.

“No,” Ura scoffs. “The man behind the mask is Yata’s Son-in-Law, the Nine-tailed Jinchuriki’s Guardian, and Tsunade Senju’s Legacy Guardian—Kai.”

A frowns but doesn’t reveal any outward shock. The deep voice speaks calmly, “You developed your Lightning Chakra Mode inspired by the cloaked chakra of the Jinchuriki, did you not? You monopolize Kumo’s medicines, altering your body with chakra and tonics to create the fortress of flesh that even a Mangekyo Sharingan’s Amaterasu failed to burn to ashes instantly. But you noticed a flaw in your Jutsu. A flaw that led you to lust after the Byakugan.”

The dark-skinned behemoth interrupts before the voice can complete its speech, “My Lightning Release Chakra Mode is perfect.”

“Are you saying you and your offspring did not have to bear the pain of your tenketsu trembling pain by releasing so much lightning-nature chakra—something a Byakugan should be able to help? That’s the crucial reason you only have- had one surviving son and why your house desires such tonics.”

A looks at the strange creature he can sense for the moment.

“Someone stopped me from assassinating Yata Uchiha. I thought it was a stray attack, but I’ve had a chance to contemplate. It was a human body with flesh and bone clad in my jutsu that struck me, sending me off course. The strange figure was physically less ‘harder’ than me. It means someone without my tonics mastered the jutsu, perfecting it in the process.”

The news surprises Ura and the mysterious ancient entity as they share a glance.

The Raikage notices his chance to leave his passive position as he questions, “Was that it? Your offer? A Byakugan to let me view my tenketsu and release my Chakra with better precision?”

“Go on,” the Raikage starts loosening the bandages around his eyes as he extends his hand. “Only a fool would ‘promise’ a Byakugan instead of bringing it. Hand me the Byakugan and speak of your objective I’m supposed to empathize with.”

Ura frowns when the archaic entity chuckles aloud.

“Controlling my chakra after so long was troublesome, but I’m glad I took on the challenge to stroll here. I almost forgot about Kage’s pride. The promise of becoming a silent Shadow, protecting the peace of their settlements, twisted to its very core. I wish the creator of this system were alive. What a face he would make.”

The voice whispers before A can interject, “Byakugan? O’ you fool, I bring the promise of all your dreams and ambitions—yet you think of sightless eyes of those disgusting fools who breed and enslave amongst their own?”

The Raikage feels himself getting pulled into a crude Genjutsu, a testament to the stranger’s assertion of not controlling their chakra for many moons since specialist genins can form better illusions. Yet the Third Raikage, despite all his prestige, pride, and thirst for knowledge, stays rooted.

In front of him stands a lone figure in a bloodless battleground. A pair of spiraling red eyes bear inherent cruelty as the red, plate-armored, dark-haired man whispers in a voice so deep that A’s recovering bones threaten to rattle.

“I leave you my very conscience to keep you from making the same mistakes I did. Raikage, don’t beg for a cup of water when presented with an Ocean. It gives a bad reputation to your kind.”

Shocking the Raikage, the figure’s Mangekyo spirals further, taking a gloomy purple color and rippled patterns before he snaps out of the Genjutsu, capable of seeing from his left eye—observing the half-white-black yellow-eyed silhouette in front.

“I replaced your left eye with the Byakugan. Think on your own about how to tackle the Dojutsu constantly devouring your chakra. I’m Ura, a white Zetsu.”

The Raikage suddenly hears another raspy voice emerging from Ura—to be precise, from the cast of black flesh on Ura’s right side.

“I’m the wisdom left by that man and need no name. I’m what you should call a Black Zetsu.”

A narrows his eye, feeling his Byakugan consuming his chakra slowly.

The Raikage narrows down to the answer left to the latter of his two questions.

“Am I to find and capture Kai? What would that earn me?”

“It’s heartwarming to see someone think about capturing targets instead of killing them,” Ura smiles, revealing jagged teeth. “But no. Kai will not be our target for a while. And we know better than to force you. The seal means nothing to you unless we enforce it, something we don’t plan on doing.”

A frowns as Black Zetsu raspily whispers.

“We don’t desire servants but capable partners. If you wish to know what he wants, capture and bring us Ichibi.”

“Bring it where?” A questions.

Ura slowly descends into the ground, melding with the earth as he replies, “Amegakure.”

A hears Ura’s words when the latter disappears into the ground completely, not leaving a hint of chakra in his wake. “Do you still think you can follow me?”

---

“Did he really defeat the Three Sannins?”

Blood drips off Mukai’s hand as he stands in the center of a large room. He stares at the corpse lying in his own pool of blood- and soon piss- as he mutters aloud.

“I thought this was a challenge to become part of his dreams.”

A spiral-faced ‘Zetsu’ dances around Mukai, clapping his hand. “Haha! You did it! Whoo! Come on! You pass!”

Mukai looks at his bloody hands. His Byakugan eases into brown hues as he questions, “Does this mean I can live in my dream world and not be bothered by anything, right, Guruguru?”

“Yep!” The spiral-faced Zetsu laughs without a mouth. “He was right! Hanzo was getting too complacent and easily died to one of the simpler Hyuga Taijutsu! Thank Rikudo, we took Sakumo instead!”

Mukai blinks, registering the information, “So, Sakumo Hatake lives. Is he under the same seal?”

***

Alternate Title: *Kai Sees People*: It’s Free Real Estate; Infants? I Call Them Fresh Training Material!; Yahiko’s Situations Persists; Kai Questioning Canon Events; Kai’s Purged Half His Sins By Capturing Danzo; The Stumbling Girl and Rabbit; The Rabbit Got The Dawg in Her?; No Fowl Creature Will Stop Me—Kai Of The Bad Puns; Two Unregistered Chakra Parties—The Old Man and the Rabbit!; The Third Raikage Recovers; Kai Causing Psychological Fears To The Party Causing Other Similar Fears; Tailed Objectives; The Dreamland?; The Past’s Goals; Not Making the Same Mistake; The Boss’ Black Will; Zetsu; Kai: Imma Call Them Cum-men; Ame Assassination; A Spy Amidst; Kai Lucked Out With Guruguru’s Existence; The Dreaded Seal; Kai Using The OG Lightning Chakra Mode Better Than OG; The Truth Behind Kumo’s Crave For Byakugan; The Prideful Calling Other Kettles Black

***

A/N: I always wanted Madara to create the Akatsuki-like group and not die. The man has his chakra supply from God’s husk! You don’t just die from that! Besides, I decided to add fanon lore for Kumo’s need for Byakugan and their unreasonable tough bodies (for Raikage’s lineage). And the idea of someone as scientifically inclined individual as the Third Raikage getting headhunted by the Ghost (not Jin of Tsushima) made me happy while writing, so I did~! Anyway, many of the past plotlines, like the rabbit, Yahiko’s resolve, Ura’s creation, and many others will converge to a satisfying end the same way Kai felt after Tsunade’s Katsuyu Pocket Pussy—I hope.