Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse: 243

Title: The First Bawdy Night (R-18-ish)

Nono and Kai can always empathize with one another due to their shared emotional spectrum. While Kushina or Mikoto desire other acts of intimacy besides training, Kai and Nono can always share a Genjutsu illusion and call it training. So Kai’s question catches Nono off-guard as she tilts her head inside the Uzumaki Compound’s Training Chamber.

“Go out? Like a date?” She questions to verify his intentions as he nods, smiling, “I’m trying to balance grinding with other stuff. I expected it to balance out with the wood clones, but the more clones I have, the more things I try to reach for. I know you aren’t the kind of Kunoichi to think our time spent training together ISN’T a date of its own, but I would like to—”

“Sure!” Nono sits up, adjusting her glasses and staring at him intently, “Are we going now?”

“You’re into it?” Kai blinks in surprise.

“Did you believe I would not look forward to my first romantic getaway?” Nono replies with another question as Kai muses aloud. “I’m lucky, huh? Sorry about not asking you out sooner. I didn’t think it like that, but Kushina has been a ‘positive’ influence.”

Nono narrows her eyes, smirking, “Then we better show her our gratitude sooner than later.”

“How about now?” Kai raises an eyebrow.

“What?” Nono hums in surprise as he tosses her earlies inquiry back with a smug smirk. “Did you believe I would not look forward to my first threesome?”

Nono giggles at that, questioning, “Do you have any plans? You are still out of Konoha for Honou City, remember?”

“I do want to take you out for simple lunch and an easygoing time around Konoha or the Capital once my clone floods it with Hiraishin, but I planned something else—something you might be into,” Kai reveals with a prideful look, more than happy with himself since he lucked out by asking Nono out earlier than she ever needed to hint AND had a plan for it!

‘All that’s left is pestering Orochimaru to take me out, and I’m good~!’ He recalls the vigorous maniac training Mokuton after inscribing [Chimera Seal] with Hashirama’s cells.

***

“Jiraiya-Sensei?” Minato huffs, dark circles painting his eyebags as he flips the script paper, “Do I really need to do this to prepare for my next training?”

Candle flickers ahead of Minato, casting a flickering shadow behind Jiraiya, who has his back turned towards the former as he quietly reads something.

“Jiraiya-Sensei?” Minato calls Jiraiya again as the self-acclaimed ‘The Most Realistic Smut-Romance Writer’ snaps out of his daze, turning his head to look at Minato with a smile, “Yeah? What is it?”

“I could be using my time to master [Hiraishin-Guiding Thunder] or Taiyogan,” Minato waves the script in his hand, “But you’re making me read your script instead!”

Jiraiya laughs, “It is necessary for your next training. You need to completely relax before you undergo something of that nature, just like the state of mind you needed before learning basic toad kata. Besides, the script in your hands is worth several thousand ryo! Show some appreciation!”

Minato’s shoulders slump as he yawns, “So, it means I can sleep if I’m tired, right? To feel completely relaxed, that is.”

Jiraiya nods, “Sure. I wanted this chance to take you AND Kai to that location since he has bugged me about it for a while, but he left for his mission before I returned.”

Minato blinks, “That reminds me, Sensei—What was so important that you had to leave during the funeral ceremony?”

Jiraiya smiles and shakes his head, “I suppose I can tell you.”

The Toad Sage turns around completely, looking at Minato with fondness and guilt as he starts speaking, “Minato, do you believe in destiny and fate?”

The blonde chunin contemplates momentarily before frowning, “It depends, Sensei. I’m not too eager to dismiss the existence of such far-reaching concepts, especially after the raid. There has always been a question in my mind—Why do the five villages hate each other? I felt it was politics since the talks of Konoha allying with Suna demonstrates the Villages as an organization may not bear a grudge toward one another. But the raid changed it all.”

Minato’s vibrant blue eyes slightly dim as he whispers, “Konoha must perform similar acts somewhere and somehow, right? I suppose someone is shedding another’s blood at this very moment, breeding hatred to pass down to the next generation. In the coming war—” he looks at his hands, imagining the scent of blood and war, “—I may be ordered to commit actions different from regular assassination missions against other Village officials and Shinobi.”

He looks at Jiraiya. “I would never believe as an Academy Student that I won’t feel fear or disgust at the thought of actions I will eventually commit during the war, Sensei. The past me would shout at me, slap me, and try to reason with me, saying it was wrong. So, if I can accept that my actions are born from duty and my desire to protect Konoha and my loved ones despite knowing hatred surrounds us, concepts like fate and destiny should not be far off.”

The youth smiles gently, chuckling, “Who knows, I may find evidence about such a concept in the future and think about another foreign element which should make my skin crawl as I am now.”

Jiraiya stares at Minato quietly, seeing more than just a smiling Shinobi who accepts this world’s condition as it is.

‘If it was before,’ Jiraiya questions himself, ‘Could Minato really bring change?’ He never doubted his beliefs before, but the Great Toad Sage’s changed prediction makes the former see aspects of his surroundings beyond his earlier norms—like Minato, who is different than the boy during his academy days. He saw a stain of darkness in Minato’s eyes, a similar taint visible in everyone around him, including himself. Who wouldn’t feel disheartened by the harsh realities of this world?

‘Did I make a mistake?’ Jiraiya wonders as Minato waits for a response. Jiraiya’s room descends into a peaceful silence for the time being.

“Did I say something wrong, Jiraiya-Sensei?” Minato chuckles awkwardly, lowering his head, “I apologize if I said something stupid. I end up thinking about it sometimes.”

Jiraiya blinks before his expression eases as he sighs.

“No, it’s my fault,” Jiraiya smiles, patting Minato’s head.

“What?” The blonde chunin looks up.

“You wouldn’t have the time to think so many stupid things if I taught you ways to get laid!” Jiraiya grins, “Forget what I said earlier! It’s time for your secret training!”

“N-Now?” Minato gasps, blushing as he recalls his first ‘experience’ during the mission with Team Sakumo.

“Of course!” Jiraiya chuckles, “It’s past midnight! It’s the most suggestive hour of the day!”

‘That’s right,’ Jiraiya’s doubts clear slightly. ‘Fate and Destiny may be realities in this world yet to be discovered, but to let it cloud your judgment and emotions is the best way to spit at one’s well-wishers’ faces. As for the new prophecy,’ he sighs in his heart. ‘We all will die one day, and someone always rises with the ambition of conquering this world. What’s new about it? The only weird thing about the entire prophecy is the ‘Jubilant Stone.’’

“Oh,” the script on the other side attracts Minato’s attention as he questions, “This is one of the scripts sent by Nono-san? Why were you reading it?”

“Don’t you know?” Jiraiya claims smugly, “Creative people copy other creative talents! Ahahaha! Come on, we’re leaving.”

“But our clothes wouldn’t sit right—”

“Use Transformation Jutsu!”

Minato groans before glancing at the title of the script one last time—The Bawdy Nights.

---

Nono fights back a blush. Not that she minds Kai’s enthusiasm and mindset to think of something despite their inability to spend time like usual due to his personal circumstances.

“But is it a little on the nose we’re doing ‘this’ on our first date, or rather, THIS is our date?” She questions with a notable husk in her voice in response to her skyrocketing heartbeat as the suspense feels nothing like the Genjutsu she weaves to her idle amusements! Then again, it might be due to her inherent fetish as the slight pain from her chained wrists barely letting her feet touch the ground sends strange jolting sensations down her arched spine.

The rattling chain, her frail struggles, and his breath down her neck make Nono chew her bottom lip.

“What is this ‘date’ you speak of?” Demands the gruff voice behind her. His hand clenches the edge of her yellow skirt before tugging it powerfully, ripping the fabric away as it dangles near her slender calf, exposing her pale thighs and frilled blue panties. She yelps in surprise.

She didn’t write this scene. Then again, ‘she’ never spoke anything about a date.

“I remember stating no voice must leak out of those lips,” he grunts, sliding his finger between her quivering lips through the fabric, humming, “Or did you forget your challenge? You will accept everything in your sister’s stead for her foolishness without letting out a sound for the entire day. You spoke, and was that a squeak before?”

He doesn’t let her reply as he bunches her light-brown hair in his fist before pulling her head back, sniffing her slender neck, and chuckling, “I’ll own you for two more days.”

Nono thins her lips, the tips of her ears and cheeks reddening as his hot exhale does wonders for her—wonders a Genjutsu failed to provide until now. No wonder Kushina tries riding him at every available second.

“So? Nothing to say?” He goads, biting her earlobe as Nono squirms, almost letting out another sound as he lets go of her hair and reaches around her back to fondle her modest breasts. While Nono specializes in Genjutsu, Kai, and Tsunade love putting everyone else through the grinder three times a week at least, ensuring those around them are either physically fit or feel the pain of being otherwise. It also means, like Kushina, Nono experiences the benefit of chakra boosting physical growth as some sort of roided puberty.

“You should give up,” Kai whispers hotly, “I have you for two more days. The things I will do to you, hmm,” he licks his lips, readily fitting into the role since he read Nono’s material for a while. The length of his finger rubs and slides against Nono’s dampening lips as he improvises further, “What would your elder sibling think of you once she knows the truth? That Tsunade spent your earnings and lost it all on the gambles. And now she is nowhere to be found!”

His finger hooks into the wet spot of her bright-blue panties, “My men will find that sloppy drunkard. You should be happy.”

“That’s not what we agreed on!” Nono gasps before looking back with a shocked expression as Kai’s lips stretch into a grin.

“Three days, dear. And I said I will forgive your debts only after you finish your foolish little challenge. I can do anything I want with Tsunade beforehand.”

Nono grows ever so furious in her act as Kai pulls her panties aside, splaying her tight, pale-pink entrance as he leans forward and steals a rightful kiss off her lips.

“Tell me, have you had a man before?” He questions as he begins to rub her damp entrance with his hands. Nono looks away, not speaking anymore, as her head hangs low while her body trembles, causing the chains to rattle again.

“Hehe~!” Kai chuckles, “Maybe I should stick it in today and make you mine.”

Nono’s eyes widen as Kai turns her around. His left hand enjoys the sensations of her soft, perky breasts while his other hand holds her chin, looking deeply into her eyes with illicit passion and possessiveness that breaks the confine of their little act.

“But breaking you will be my delight. And I’m no brute who cannot control myself. You will stay like this now that I have you for three more days. We will have lots of fun~!”

---

Kai looks at the furiously scribbling Nono, who cares little about her ripped skirt and disheveled top. He healed her wrists before anything else.

“I take it you enjoyed what I had planned?” Kai questions as Nono stops scribbling. Her bedroom, like usual, is neat and tidy, while her cupboards hold the weirdest items she can find, which is in line with her personality. She turns back with a wry expression, “Sorry, this isn’t what you had expected after what we did.”

“No worries,” Kai lies on his side on Nono’s bed while watching her with a smile. “I’m glad our first ‘Bawdy’ Date could inspire you. I thought for a while about what I should do for our first date, but I recalled Jiraiya’s words—Creative people are ‘inspired’ by other creative talents. So I went for this. I’m glad it gave you more ideas for your first smut.”

Nono smirks with a little red on her cheeks, “To be honest—I didn’t put myself in the female protagonist’s position before. I started Bawdy Nights after reading one of Jiraiya’s passages, but now?” Her gaze flickers. “I have a solid base for the unreliable sister who caused this mess, I think I can make the protagonist perverted enough, and I have a great role for the debt collector who will do anything to exact his price.” She eyes him, “And nice improvisation.”

“Thanks,” Kai grins. “Would you like to continue the same tradition for our dates? Don’t get me wrong, I want to take you out for some barbeque the second ‘I’ return from my mission.”

“Of course,” she grins, adding, “And I can’t wait for more of these ‘Bawdy’ Dates now that I have the mind of adding supporting characters, like an innocent redhead who was the debt collector’s previous victim and is corrupted to the point she joins the debt collector to ‘use’ the female protagonist! There is also a raven-haired female samurai who comes from a long line of prestigious warriors and is the Debt Collector’s first victim once her family meets a sudden demise! And we cannot forget the Debt Collector’s four trainees—an energetic and wild girl who only wags her tail for the debauched Debt Collector, a blue-haired war orphan who will do anything to repay his kindness, a young red-eyed trainee who finds problems with the war orphan, and the silent and shy trainee learning medicine!”

Kai blinks as his mind registers her words before he frowns, “Is that necessary? I don’t want to read your newer chapters thinking about my team. Why not add Orochimaru instead?”

Nono mulls over it before shaking her head. “I think I will end up giving the white-scaled Lamia quite a lot of screentime if I write about her.”

Kai groans as he rolls over, “Do whatever you’d like. It’s not like things can get any weirder.”

“What do you mean?” Nono questions curiously.

***

Alternate Title: The Narutoverse’s Smutty Arabian Nights; The Bro and The Date; Now That’s Character Development!; Tied Nono is a Happy Nono; A Tame Fetish in the World Where Almost Anything is Possible; Enactment of a Fiction… IN a Fiction!; Nono’s First Script; Minato’s Darkness; The Fate and Destiny That Surrounds Us All; The Prophecy Of The Jubilant Stone; The Dragon, The White-Eyed Witch, and The Jubilant Stone’s Rightful Itch; Improvising; Jiraiya: You Must Learn My Ways Before Sage’s Way!; Minato Packing Experience Before Traveling To Uzu; The Inspired Supporting Cast; Kai’s New Victims!; Tsunade Reprising as a Sloppy Drunk Gambler in Every Verse!

***

A/N: I just thought it was intriguing to see characters find amusement in their in-world works. No worries, we will have more smut. It’s the first enactment of the Bawdy Nights, after all!