Paradise of Infinity: 356

Title: Racially Curious Time

“Just answer me,” Eda snaps. “Did you or did you not know?” She already knows the answer, but the admission from the other side of the phone makes the woman grit her jaws before she ends the call and tosses the phone to Nik, scowling, “Destroy it however you like it. Nobody knows how secretive those shitheads can be.” Nik catches the cell phone with his right hand before devouring it.

“Shitheads?” Nik sips his milkshake. Eda was harping about how her agency would be the best for Nik and his kind a few minutes ago.

“Did you believe I’m gonna give a damn about them after they gave up on me?” She snorts, wearing a provocative tank top and miniskirt with angular pink shades. Despite the glances from others in the cafe, Eda looks unperturbed. Women from Roanapur aren’t best known for their modesty, that’s for sure.

Nik smiles at Eda as she rolls her eyes.

“Don’t give me that look,” she barks. “Sure, I’m not good. Doing things for the country means sacrificing a few morals. But I don’t believe in traitors. And DON’T you call spies traitors! It was my job to snitch on Roanapur, get it?”

She crosses her arms. “Either way, I think we should leave—”

“H-Here’s your order,” a trembling teen girl brings Nik’s order with a flushed face as she only looks at Nik. His expression brightens as he accepts the order of 8 Subway sandwiches and another three milkshakes under Eda’s bland glare.

 “Thank you,” Nik smiles at the girl as she ducks her head and leaves.

“I pity your toilet, man,” Eda scoffs.

“Believe it or not, there’s nothing to pity about,” Nik shrugs. His body needs more energy than regular humans. This condition will likely become more exaggerated unless Nik finds another solution in one of the worlds he travels. “The surprising thing is how Koro doesn’t need to eat as much as me. After all, Ray’s worse than me. Not that she will ever binge in others’ presence since she doesn’t find it cute.”

Nik stuffs his face with one of the sandwiches.

“Do you want a bite?” Nik offers Eda a sandwich as she shakes her head.

“Sigh, what am I gonna do now?” she groans. “I can’t go back to the U.S. Roanapur won’t be any safer since I was arranged to stay at the Rip-Off Church by others.”

“If only you had someone to provide you protection and land,” Nik washes down the sandwich with a mango milkshake as he plays along.

“Maybe someone strapping that does things out of kindness,” Eda leads as she licks her lips, to which Nik retorts, “Yeah, someone who didn’t put his life on the line. Alas…”

“Oh, yeah,” Eda blanks out. “We’re going to have to do something about that. How about creating a Decision-Making Body inside that world to let us vote on your actions?” The woman appears ten times more dignified in her shameless words despite being dressed as a cheap back-alley whore.

“I’ll create one now,” Nik shrugs. “The Body’s name is Nik Sees, Nik Eats. I’m the only member. So, I vote on things. Happy?”

“Tch,” Eda clicks her tongue as Nik tilts his head. “I thought you would be more… apprehensive about joining me.”

“Well, I’m not afraid of a good dick. But you can shove it up your ass if it's something exaggerated, like 16 inches. I don’t need my guts rearranged.”

Nik smirks, “I meant the other thing.”

“Please,” Eda smiles back. “I’ll be a fool to believe my life isn’t already in another’s hand. The Big Uncle sees it all, Nik. Do you think I would live if someone from the executive side thought I was a trouble? I could run for a while, but I would be staring down the barrel of a gun in a few days. Besides, it’s not like we’re immortal… wait, can I become an Immortal?”

Her gaze turns intense.

“Probably?” Nik shrugs. “As in longer lifespan. But I don’t know if there’s anything TRULY immortal.”

“Sweet,” Eda smirks. “So? What benefits will I get if I join you?” Her foot slips out of her sandal as Eda publicly rests her feet upon Nik’s crotch under the table… something everyone can see as they almost choke on their food.

“I haven’t thought about that,” Nik munches without care. She can blow him for all he cares—Nik will stay true to the sandwiches and the shakes until the end! “But I don’t mind if you want to live. It’s not like I’m asking something in return.”

Eda blinks.

“What?”

“Did you think you need to have sex with me to live in that world?” Nik snorts a chuckle. “They are two different things. Why would I force you to sleep with me? That seems counterproductive in promoting a healthy lifestyle in my Scar of Infinity.”

“That sounds… sensible…” Eda works her jaw, not moving her foot one bit.

“You’re still not moving your foot,” Nik notes.

“I’m not,” Eda smirks as she rests her cheek on her hand. “So? Ready to confess, bad boy?”

“Not before you wear that nun habit,” Nik utters as Eda deadpans. “Then build me a church.”

“You got it.”

“And a special confessional booth for us.”

“Anything else?”

Eda cups her chin. “I finally see what Revy was talking about. You ARE annoying. I don’t get why other chicks in the cafe are gushing for you.”

“Maybe they have better taste,” Nik tosses back as his smartphone rings.

“Oh? That’s Shenhua.”

“She’s coming over?” Eda blinks, not finding the Taiwanese woman an eyesore.

Nik reads the text message before shaking his head.

“She says Chang returned to Hong Kong. She will return after ensuring his safe return since things aren’t going well.”

“Why would she return?” Eda frowns. “That sounds like Chang wanting to… wait, she knows you can do the mind things, right?”

“Yep.”

“Huh,” Eda muses. “So, she’s either lying, or Shenhua thinks you’re a good bet.”

“A good bet?” Nik blinks, curious about Eda’s thought process.

“That’s something I learned after a few missions,” Eda exhales. “Life’s a gamble. The only difference between me and the dead enemy is the bet we placed. This bet can be emotions like love and hate or investments into people or property to be leveraged against something we want. You must have made a few bets of your own, Nik. We all do.”

Nik sinks in silence before nodding. “That’s an entertaining way to look at things, thanks. So, you’re betting on me?”

“For my immediate survival, yes?” Eda smirks. “For my long-term objectives, I’m thinking of getting a sappy guy like you hooked by having a kid of two. What do you think? Ready for the Holy Matrimony?”

“Oh!” Nik blurts. “You can TOTALLY officiate my wedding with others.”

Just like that, Eda finds herself landing an unfortunate job.

<<<>>>

Nik doesn’t plan to waste the seven-day vacation on idle training. He cannot efficiently train Prana-Bindu, so it’s set aside until he can hopefully use the Osmosian Gene Package to absorb energy.

Nik instead plans to use Kopi Kopi no Mi to copy and paste several modern ‘functions’ in his Scar of Infinity, for instance, the Internet. But Nik admits he’s out of depths, so he locates Koro on the mountain accommodating Class 3-E, surprisingly finding Irina alongside the ‘man.’

“There you are!” She hisses, her blue eyes flaring with indignant passion. “What’s with you leaving me hanging like that?”

“Hanging like what?” Nik questions before nodding at Koro-Sensei.

“That… you didn’t tamper with my mind on that train!”

Nik nods, “I didn’t. I thought you didn’t want me to.”

“And?” Irina raises her brows.

“And you’re welcome?” Nik reveals a strange expression as Irina almost blows her top.

“Pfft,” Nik reveals a crooked smirk. “I was just messing with you,” he lightly flicks her nose as he questions. “So? What were you two upto?”

“Hmph, nothing important—”

“Irina-Sensei wanted me to tell her some of your weaknesses,” Koro-Sensei grins. “Not for assassination, I assure you.”

Irina’s cheeks blaze with shame, turning beet red as she clenches her fists. “N-No! I wanted to kill you in your bed!”

“Well, that’s hurtful,” Nik sincerely admits with a wronged look. His innocent expression falters Irina as she bites her bottom lip. Nik shrugs again. “But my weaknesses include children, milkshakes, and Ignit. You can use them by having my child, making me milkshakes, or trying to replace me in Ignit’s life.”

“Wha— W-who’s Ignit?” Irina gulps, finding such a calm and easygoing Nik… unnerving. She would rather face the agitated Nik, who was willing to hurt her for Nagisa.

“Ignit? Why, she’s the best girl in my life, of course,” Nik assures as Irina gapes.

“The best girl?” Her blue eyes dart around. "Tell me about her. How tall is she? What do you like her about the most? Is she blonde?”

Nik chuckles, “She’s around 210 centimeters tall and 350 centimeters long with a wingspan of 580 centimeters. Hmm, I think Ignit’s most loveable trait is her sass. She really likes showing me up before demanding scratches and pats… No, she’s not blonde… She has forest-green scales.”

“What?” Irina questions dumbly.

“My companion Dragon, Ignit,” Nik informs before questioning candidly. “Would you like to know more?”

At this point, Nik figures the best way to attract others into his Scar of Infinity is by showing them its development. That’s why he’s saving Sofia for the last. That woman undoubtedly has high standards, or so Nik expects. So, he wants to accomplish a few things before inviting her inside.

And who wouldn’t want to invite Irina?

Disregarding the first impression, Irina is a dedicated woman. She takes her job of teaching the students as any other job and performs her duties as best she can.

“Well,” Irina clears her throat. “If you insist…” she scoffs.

“I do,” Nik warmly answers as Irina purses her lips and looks away again.

“Ehm,” Koro coughs. “Did you want something, Nik-Sensei?”

“Oh, yep!” Nik grins. “I wanted your help developing my Scar of Infinity by designing the foundational infrastructure. Are you—”

Koro momentarily flickers before appearing to Nik’s and Irina’s gaze in an architect’s hat, a monocle, and a sketchbook in one of his tentacle hands.

“—free?” Nik completes before snickering. “Be sure not to invade others’ privacy, Koro-Sensei,” Nik extends his left hand.

“W-Wait! Can I join?” Irina questions.

“That’s a given,” Nik blinks. “Why would I leave you out?” The blunt certainty in his voice brings a smile to Irina’s face as she places her hand atop Nik’s left hand alongside Koro.

“How romantic~” Koro trills as Irina snaps, “Shut up!”

A few minutes later.

“I’m here!” Ray performs a familiar dialogue before entering the faculty room and looking around. “Eh? Where is everybody? Nik said he had something fun planned.”

“Nik isn’t here,” Tadaomi settles a flat stare on the cheeky Succubus. “But Nik-Sensei said you would answer a few of my questions.”

Ray’s expression freezes as she realizes…

She’s been pranked!
Bamboozled!

‘Damn you, Nik! It doesn’t end here!’

Ray solemnly vows.

‘I’ll make sure my baby drains you!’

Better phrases could have been thought.

<<<>>>

“Now, I’ve seen everything. I’m ready to be blind again,” Toph licks her teeth before smacking her lips, not astute enough to see Poppy’s hand flashing her way to smack the back of her head. The surrounding murmur suppresses Toph’s pained yelp as Sokka steps out. “Nik… when you say this Gooblidook can help us, do you mean raising our spirits by showing tricks?”

“I’m Koro—”

“That’s a horrible thing to say, Sokka!” Kya frowns. “You shouldn’t make fun of the less fortunate!”

“But I’m not less fortunate—”

“Look, it even speaks our language,” Azula sneers.

“It’ll make a good target doll,” Suki crosses her arms.

“It looks delicious,” Katara unexpectedly swallows a lump with shining eyes, sending chills down Koro’s spine. “I want to cook a soup out of it.”

“Did you call me for this toy?” Mai shakes her head.

“HOW RUDE!” Koro snaps with a red face as steam flows out of his pores, surprising others. “I’m not an IT. I’m Korosensei! I’m a man just like Nik!”

“Really?” The Ty Sisters blink. “But you are yellow. Your face also turns different colors… it’s cute/bitch!”

“O-Oh, thanks~!” Koro forgets his anger as his face returns to the previous color with two prominent blush spots.

“Wait,” Zuko speaks up. “He can understand us, and we can understand him. Nik spoke well about this man despite warning us of his perverted tendencies. Then again… it can’t be worse than Nik.”

“Hey!” Koro and Nik retort simultaneously.

“I’m not a womanizer like Nik-Sensei!”

“Yeah! And I’m not fixated on big boobs like Korosensei!”

“Hmm?”

Several gazes from well-endowed ladies concentrate on him as he coughs into a fist. “Not that I hate them.”

“The point is,” Zuko criticizes the bunch, “We aren’t treating our aid with the respect he deserves. It’s not funny to make such verbal jabs.”

“Very good, Zuko,” Ursa pats her son’s shoulder with a proud smile, hiding the fact she wanted to ask Koro if he would be willing to play the evil spirit in one of the plays she’s writing.

Azula scoffs and rolls her eyes, “Kiss ass.”

“You’re saying that?” Jin smirks mischievously.

“Welcome,” Nik smiles at Koro and Irina. “Let me show you guys around. Sokka, Yue, and Poppy, you three should join us. Oh, Irina, do you need help—”

“I can speak Mandarin just fine,” Irina looks around. It’ll be a lie to say she wasn’t surprised. However…

‘Heh, they have nothing on me,’ Irina sneers internally until…

“Well, see ya later! Come on, June! You still can’t bend for shit!” Toph grabs June’s hand before sinking into the ground as June rolls her eyes, drawling, “Whatever you say, Master.” Amusement flickers in her tone at the word ‘Master’ as she openly eyes Irina before tossing Nik an impressed nod.

Irina’s lips gape as her shock intensifies when she hears a loud, dragging roar in the distance.

“W-What was that?”

“Oh? That’s Ignit. She likes to play with Nyla during the day.” Nik informs.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of, dear,” A graceful woman steps out alongside a white-haired woman and Sokka. Nik pecks the two women on the lips as he introduces them. “These are Poppy, Yue, and Sokka. Yue and Sokka singlehandedly deal with the village. The village wouldn’t have existed without them. And Poppy is the Financial Officer.”

“A glorified title,” Poppy shakes her head. “I spend most of my days with Michi and Mai at their flower shop since there’s nothing financial to keep track of.”

“Oh, come on, you didn’t have to butter me up so much,” Sokka smirks. “Or did you now get a thing for hunks?”

“You barely classify a hunk,” Nik flexes his biceps.

“Hi, I’m Yue,” Yue smiles at Irina and Koro. “And Nik is underplaying his role. He’s the one who brought us together.”

“How did he do that?” Irina questions numbly.

Sokka, Yue, and Poppy glance at each other before they simultaneously shrug.

“He likes to plunder.”

Irina’s lips twitch as she looks at the innocently whistling Nik.

“Come on,” he clears his throat. “I want you to see all the three worlds. I plan to develop them individually so we can be creative due to their climates.” He informs Koro.

***

Alternate Title: Eda Skips The Betrayed Fem Character Arc; Nik’s Modest Order; The Nun Approaches; The Big Uncle Watches; Eda’s Philosophy; Eda: Unironically Proposes Nik *Nik: Counter Proposal. Now You Marry Me To Others; Eda’s Feels a Disturbance In The Force; Nik Inviting Other Girls To His World: It’s Free Real Estate; Shenhua Sad; Irina Needs Info; Irina Trembles At The Power That Is Ignit; Koro Gets The Racist Treatment; Toph: Pluck My Eyes Now; Shots Fired; Katara Becomes The Real Danger; Zuko With The Fragment of Iroh’s Wisdom; Ursa Is Proud… and Sad At the Loss of a Spirit Villain; Azula Catches Stray Shots Every Time Nik: Yeah, She Does~; The Golden Team; Irina Calls For Headpats; Who’s The Pet Here? The Dragon? Or The Human-Shaped Head Pat Machine? Ignit and Nik: Yes*; Three Worlds; Nik About To Introduce The Menace: World Wide Web; Sofia: What’s Taking Him So Long To Invite Me There? *Nik: Pulls Out All The Stops To Develop The World To Impress The Lady*; Ty Sisters: Oh! He’s Yellow Again; Irina: It’s Not Like I’m a Tsundere! I Just Don’t Like… Expressing The TRUTH!; Ray: Oh, The Horror! I’ve Been Bamboozled!