Is this Gary's most positive status update ever?

Nah, but it's still positive.

So I've made it pretty clear right now that I'm sick of constantly writing about the pacing of my work for this update and how it's been persistently plaguing my mind. So I'll let the negative aspect of that topic sit in the corner of the room looking almost indistinguishable from an elephant.

I'm writing this off of the most productive streak of days I've had since July. I sincerely hope this is some kind of revitalization, and while I don't intend to count my chickens before they hatch, I'm going to proceed to count my chickens before they hatch. I think the difference between what's going on right now and the previous struggle is a matter of willpower and perseverance, I don't know what's sparked the change, but I beg it sticks. Hopefully, this can lead to some introspection which could assist in diagnosing my poor performance on certain days.

Regarding the "willpower", most of the days where I've underperformed ended with complacency and defeatism. Essentially, I'd be tired and left with two options; push harder, or sleep. I always chose sleep, it was a pretty torrential spiral. And as I've been implying, these last few days I've somehow been able to choose the opposite, keeping at it until I've hit targets.

Which leads me to the next segment of my status update: Naively saying shit under the assumption that I'm going to stay perfect forever from now on. I've done some math and dabbled with which kind of constraints I should allow myself, and basically what I've concluded is that it will take at least 30 days to finish rendering. 30 days is a hypothetical lower bound assuming generally decent performance. That is to say that it's possible but extremely unlikely. But that should give you an idea of what kind of range I'm in, if I were to perform well with 100% consistency, 30 days is your number.

Tentatively, I'm thinking I can keep up my current pace for the foreseeable future. I'm going to try and be a little more punctual with status updates. The reason I haven't been posting them particularly frequently is because I was ashamed of my work output, and each update would have been an embarrassing admittal of underperformance.

Oh, and these renders look awesome, by the way. Some of these shots will leave you raising an eyebrow, asking if it's really HS2. I'm delighted with my approach to shaders and lighting, and if you were a fan of my graphical style towards the end of Ep 2 Pt 1, you'll be extremely happy with how much more polish it's received.

That's all for now. I'm pretty sure I hit rock bottom during this dev cycle, which means there's only one way left to move. Here's to regaining the spark and spending the upcoming week, months, or years learning myself enough to squash these issues.

Thanks for sticking with me as we approach an entire fucking year without an update.

-Gary