Season 2? No, Thank You

………………………………

Hector P.O.V.

There’s something very relaxing about being the strongest creature around. To be impervious to damage and pretty much untouchable. This is a similar feeling of freedom I had when I started traveling, a feeling that rich people are used to, the feeling when you know you can do anything.

I like being overpowered…

I mean, I don’t doubt that it must get boring eventually, but I’m so free that it's up to me to be overpowered or not. I can go spend years in low-level worlds to feel like a god, or go grind in high-level ones and start from the bottom to climb up.

Once again, it will be about balance. For now, while I am stuck in this world, I’m gonna enjoy being overpowered.

“I will try not to lower my guard, though…” I say while sitting on a rock in the mountains. The view is amazing from here “But it is easier said than done. I can’t help it.”

Now I understand how it happens all the time in fiction, the overpowered character being caught with his guard down, or dying because he underestimated his opponent.

I will try not to get angry with the characters who are caught lacking from now on. Like Superman, who, for some reason, is always hit by kryptonite that is slower than him.

Changing subject, I’m really liking having the Eye of Aurora, teleportation is really a “must have” in my travels. Too bad principles like Space and Time can change from world to world, so it will be some time till I find a reliable method of teleportation that I can use everywhere.

“Probably some meta ability, maybe a magic spell, a portal gun…” Only after I do the jump to the next world will I confirm if the Eye of Aurora will work, but I’m not that hopeful.

Jackie Chan Adventures is a low-level universe after all.

“It will be enough if it works in some modern Earths, but it is already good enough that I can use it here.” I sit cross-legged on this huge boulder while making the talimans floating around me.

On my right, there’s a holo projector showing screens of the hidden cameras I left in Uncle’s shop. It was too risky to let some on Section 13, and Jackie is still the linchpin of the plot.

On my left, there are some snacks, because you always need some snacks while studying. Yes, studying…

I’m studying the talismans. I believe there is an unexplored potential in their powers. When I think about it, most of the time, the talismans are used once by new owners and never for long. No one ever had the opportunity to train and get good with them.

We only saw Shendu with them briefly, and that was not enough.

Obviously, there are some powers that are pretty much straightforward, like the Ox Talisman, but there are others that I can imagine some development routes because of the amount of media that I consumed.

Like the Monkey Talisman, for example, the one that I’m focusing on now.

There’s nothing that prevents the Monkey Talisman from transforming the user, but every time it happens, the talisman stays outside my body even though my clothes disappear. All talismans in truth stay outside.

This is a problem. If I turn into something like a fish, I will not be able to hold them, so the plan is that when the Monkey Talisman turns me into animals, it goes in whatever magic space my clothes also go.

I have my own Inventory as an extra option, but retrieving the talismans from there to use in an animal form can be a hassle, especially if the animal doesn’t have hands or is very small…

The ideal is that I can use the talismans like I’m wearing them, and they stay hidden somewhere in my animal form by magic. That would be almost a cheat.

“Shendu keeps them on his body… Should I try the same?” I ponder, making the Monkey Talisman turn me into a chimp, and I strike the thinking pose.

Hmm, with the Hercules Method, it would not be that hard to keep the talisman in the space between my organs, but it would be very unpleasant.

Let’s try to practise first before doing anything extreme. I would do it, but maybe it is not needed.

I scratch my furred body with my new rough and long chimp fingers.

Even though I can’t talk, my mental faculties appear to remain the same.

Zaap

I turn into a bird now.

Let’s see… 1+1=2, 2+2=4… I think therefore I am… The capital of Australia is Canberra… 

Yeah, I think my intelligence remains the same, which would not be physically or biologically possible, but I guess that is… Magic~.

I try some more times, holding the Monkey Talisman tightly in my hands, but every time it remains outside my body.

Well, I am here to practise, let’s try for some more hours… Or, how I would say in this cat body: “Meowth.”

………………………………………..

I spent two hours practicing and failed.

But I feel that is possible… I feel it! 

I stopped because my prepared snacks ended, so I will go back to collect Magical Items.

The next on the list is another top-tier… the Armor of Eight Immortals!

Pfft, I knew this was a wannabe cultivation world!

Xianxia name aside, the armor is a pretty neat thing. Something Jackie used to fight the Earth Demon, a powerful physical opponent.

Normally, it would be hard to find it because the cartoon only says that it is in a mountain in China, but I didn’t study under Uncle for nothing. I read his notes and everything else.

I was preparing for this day and found clues about the armor beforehand. In the cartoon, it was Uncle who found it, but this time it was me because I was actively searching for information in his books.

“There it is…” I float down in front of the antique Chinese armor, which is mostly blue with some silver details in the edges of the pieces.

It does not look functional and is not even something that I would use, but that armor could very well come from a Super Sentai show, because it changes into a skin-tight super suit.

“Let’s try it.”

Keeping only my boxers and my Talisman Belt, I put on the armor with the help of my telekinesis. Feeling like a character from Saint Seiya… When the helmet falls into place, I don’t take only to I feel a “magical click” and the thing morphs and tightens into a full body suit of the same color.

“Hmm, very comfortable and breathable… Something a superhero would wear, but I wish my face were covered.” But I guess it helps with the fact that I can use the Pig Talisman this way.

And hey, look at this, the Talisman belt is underneath the suit, well protected.

Hm, maybe now… With my will, I reach for the power of the Monkey Talisman and slowly morph into a chimp. I like turning to chimps… Return to monke.

Oh, look at that, the talismans disappeared beneath this animal form construct! Finally! The armor also disappeared. Magic with magic, huh? Not ideal, but is a shortcut.

I will try to remember the feeling and try later without it, but now it’s proven that it is possible. Like the animagus form on Harry Potter.

I return to being a human to try out the abilities of the armor.

It’s a simple boost in all physical stats like strength and durability, but let’s see how much. Those walls are too pristine… Let’s make some holes.

“Hm?” I turn around after feeling something and look at how I found “Oh, hello, Jackie Chan.” Since I defeated him, I guess it’s not proper to call him Sifu.

“Hector…” Jackie says slowly, eyeing me carefully, wearing his archaeologist clothes.

“I see, hehe~ Uncle sent you here to find this armor so that you could fight me.” It’s not hard to guess that much. “Too bad I studied under him, too. I obviously took notes of everything capable of threatening me, and you are too late.” I smile triumphantly

“...”

“Well, if you don’t wanna talk, I will go.” And with that, I just walked to him and passed him without doing anything.

There’s no reason for us to fight. I’m not that much of an asshole that I would hurt him for no reason, and Jackie has enough goodwill with me that even if he tries to constantly stop me, I will still not hurt him that badly. I will probably even heal him.

Jackie also doesn’t try anything funny beyond clenching his fists, so I guess I’m done here. There are still two items that I will try to get today…

“Jade asked for you.” Jackie suddenly said after I passed him

“...” That made me pause

Turning my head to look back, I say in a calm voice. “I guess that the first disillusionment is always tough. Tell her that it gets easier with time…” It’s the only thing I can say.

What more there’s to say, right? Justify myself? Say that she shouldn’t be so naive from now on? Or maybe say to not judge everyone she meets in the future based on this specific experience?

That would be intruding too much… She needs to grow by herself. What she takes from it… only she has the right to decide. 

I like the little gremlin, but we will never meet again.

I was moving again to leave before I remembered something “Ah, tell Uncle to research about Shendu and… his family… It will be useful in the future. Bye~” 

Whoosh I speed away. It will not be a cool exit if I keep yapping.

……………………….

“This is low-key very useful.” I say while moving my four arms around.

Yes, four arms… The Armbands of Shiva don’t need a lot of words to explain their magical powers.

After putting on the two golden armbands, it duplicates your arms to mimic the Hindu God. As a bonus, the Armor of Eight Immortals covers all four armors, too. Magic~

“It is just… Just a little strange, but it's also intuitive. It’s like I have been born this way.” It only needs some moves and stretches for me to use the extra arms perfectly. Magic, I guess, or maybe because it's perfect copies, so everyone would already be used to it.

Now, it’s not anything super overpowered, but anyone with a brain can understand that having an extra set of limbs is a great boost. It opens to a whole new world of possibilities for fighting styles.

Sukuna should it best recently, but one can do more.

Wielding more weapons, maybe holding a much heavier shield with two left arms, an arm ready to throw hidden weapons between attacks, and doing magic while fighting in closed quarters.

Having more limbs is something that is more advantageous; the better you are, the more you have a… How could I say it? A foundation… A normal person would not do much beyond maybe working faster, while a martial artist can do much better.

Now, someone like me, who one day will master a lot of fighting styles, weapons, and magic… Wow, it has potential. It reflects my potential! It “scales” with how good the user is.

A thought later, and I make extra arms easily disappear.

“Okay, gold is not really my color, but I can use those armbands normally - different from the Eye of Aurora - so I will keep them on me all the time. I will only cover it with my long sleeves.

After getting what I want, I go check the list to see if there's anything more here in India.

“Sutras of Raktajiba?” I read the name and remember the episode. It’s nothing interesting to me… Just an incantation to drain the Ganges. I’m here for magical items that I can use, not any specific magic spell.

“I can leave this country, at least…” Beautiful and all that, but not to my liking, not a good place to relax and overstay. Just for some tourism. 

………………………………………

Third Person P.O.V.

With his knowledge, speed, and recently acquired teleportation ability, Hector is able to make quick work of all the Magic Items that exist in this world. 

But even with a Collector/Hoarder mentality, Hector was able to let go of some items that would not be as useful for anything beyond him having them to put on a shelf.

Some items are even detrimental for him to acquire, like the Emerald of Killarney, which brings a curse of bad luck to the user. It can only be passed through a willing exchange, so it could not even be used as a weapon against an enemy.

Or the Greenbeard’s Gloves that control the user to steal and hoard a great amount of treasure.

But most of the items he let go and crossed off his list are the ones that he has no real use for, or even let the people of this world keep them.

Like the Chalice of Life, initially a really useful item that, when he thinks a little more deeply, would not add much beyond being a pretty thing to his collection. He is already immortal, and the chalice only works with the specific water from the sacred altar.

Obviously, on his long list of things to obtain, there is “a way to make the people close to me immortal” highlighted, after all, he wants to have companions, lovers, pets… And a guy that wants to enjoy an immortal life around the Omniverse doesn’t want to see them dying from old age..

That was not fun at all, even if he can accept that death is part of life, and many acquaintances will eventually die, but he wants to keep the ones really close to him forever. A select few…

Unfortunately, it is not this time that he will acquire the solution to this problem. He doesn’t mind though; he has a lot of options.

He could still go for the Chalice of Life, of course… As a guy who used to enjoy completing 100% of his games, he is tempted to create a huge collection of anything he finds on his travels.

But the Chalice is protected by an isolated civilization and is important to them… he will feel a little bad. Putting his desire for this useless item and the small guilt he will feel in a balance, he decides that it is not worth this time. He is already carrying too much guilt for betraying the Chan family… 

Maybe next time…

“I guess I’m more mature now.” He nods to himself, satisfied. But that doesn’t stop him from stealing the Opal of Anglee, another useful magical item. “It does not add much but is not completely useless, and no one will miss it. It is better to have it than not to have it.” Who knows? Maybe one day it could be useful… different from the Chalice that which would only be as useful in the future as a normal cup.

The Opal is like a magic Mega Man arm cannon; he can play with it if he gets bored.

Hector goes to look at the list again. “Let’s see… Déjà Vu Stone? I don’t wanna mess with time travel… But wait, I didn’t exist before, so I guess I’m kinda immune. I will take it later, like the Eye of Aurora, it probably can’t work outside this universe, but… I don’t know, better in my hands, I guess. Some items are useless, like this Burmese Raccoon and Golden Squid… Only decorative pieces, but I guess if no one is going to miss them, I can add them to my collection. So next should be this! The Scroll of Hung-Chao.”

Then he checks another tab of his holographic screen and sighs “But the temple only appears during the full moon. What do I do now?”

He pauses and goes back to the list, his eyes landing on the top of it, where the twelve talismnas are listed, but only ten are crossed out.

“Well, I guess it’s time to go back to the Main Mission…” And he teleports away

…………………………………………….

The Rat Talisman finally appeared.

It really “appeared” because it went to the Chan Family and Section 13, instead of having to search the whole world for it. In San Francisco, just beneath their noses

Jackie tried to get the lamp that, by chance, contained the talisman, but it became impossible to explain the circumstances to the organizers of the event. There’s a lot of money and face involved in this charity event.

So the last alternative is to buy the whole lamp to get the talisman.

Unfortunately, the Dark Hand also got a whiff of the news and is now competing for the bidding for the talisman.

But even if Valmont is a super-rich crime lord, he can’t compare with the budget of a global spy organization that just recently got a free sample of what the talismans are capable of, by having Hector kicking their asses.

In the end, Jackie sighs in relief when the auctioneer shouts excitedly while hitting his hammer on the podium. He was successful in buying it.

“Going once… Going twice… and going three times! Sold to the gentleman in the-”

Plim

His relief is short-lived when, before the final announcement, Hector suddenly appeared inside a diamond-shaped light and grabbed the lamp holding the talisman casually.

Most of the people are murmuring, confused by the sudden appearance of someone, thinking that his teleportation is just some light show.

“Man… At this point, and you guys are playing by the rules? Pffft!” Hector laughs loudly while his eyes scan the only people not confused, Jackie Chan and the Dark Hand. “That is why you guys will never win…” He continues chuckling while noticing the shadows moving suspiciously

‘At least Shendu has the right idea… Thankfully, he is stuck as a statue.’

Plim

Hector disappeared in a teleporting light before the shadowkhan could do as much as touch his shadow.

“Damn it!” One of the goons of the Dark Hand exclaims while Jackie shows a worried face

“... we have a problem.”

………………………………………..

Far away, sitting on the edge of a building's roof in New York, Hector holds the Rat Talisman in a telekinetic grip, just inches above his palm, the stone octagon turning to show the inscriptions on the back.

“Animate anything, huh? Even dead bodies?” Hector starts thinking about new applications of his recently-acquired talisman “But it needs contact so it’s one at a time…  This is the most important talisman to Shendu, but is not that great to me. I can animate a golem maybe, use the talisman as a core-” he was thinking loudly when he suddenly sees a comic book store at the end of the street.

On it, he saw a life-size doll of a female superhero he didn’t know because it probably only exists in this universe.

“............................................” Diabolical things cross his mind.

“Didn’t Nintendo create a life-size Gardervoir plushie in my home world?” He asks himself slowly, but then shakes his head “Okay, I’m just kidding… hehe~”

“..........................”

“But I’m pretty sure there’s a 2B sex doll…”

………………………………………………

Hector P.O.V.

Jokes aside, let’s do serious business before thinking nasty things.

Even if I now I could give life to a life-size sex doll of 2B - or any other fictional character - why would I do it, when the real thing is available to me?

I mean, it will take some time, and power, and charisma… Maybe a few tries repeating the same universe to get the right “choices” to complete the “route” of the said character in this unlimited dating sim game I call the Omniverse… but I can. Everything is possible to me.

I bet the wait and the effort will be compensated in the end… Making the conquest even more enjoyable.

And 2B should not be that difficult, let’s be real, she is probably one of the easiest in the whole Omniverse. It’s not like I will try to romance Makima.

And it should be possible to get on her dead, psychotic, manipulative heart even if I don’t have chainsaws sticking out of my body. If I’m good enough…

Just a matter of time… The Omniverse is open like a buffet; I just need a long enough reach to get everything I want.

“And that is why I’m doing this…” I say loudly, while facing my opponent of the moment.

“What in heaven are you talking about?” The baldie in front of me is asking with a raised eyebrow… his eyebrows are weird, it’s one of those super long ones. Hair grows everywhere but the head, huh? Man has it rough…

“Sorry, I got the habit of monologuing in my mind because I’m lonely.” I confess.

“Do you think I care about your woes?!”

“Ouch, and here I was opening up to you.“ I shake my head, my little heart is hurt by his dismissive attitude.

“Fool! I now have the Scroll of Hung-Chao! I’m invincible!” He waves the piece of paper in front of himself, bragging maniacally

“...” Eh… Does he know that he is bragging in front of a guy wearing the Armor of Eight Immortals, Bands of Shiva, Eye of Aurora, and eleven of the Twelve Talismans?

If we go band to band, I’m gonna mog you, bro~ Pfft, Gen-Z slang is funny…

“Take this!” He puts his hand in the scroll, and when he removes it, there is a green inscription shining on his palm. He thrusts his arm forward, and a rather enormous green chi blast flies at me.

Whoosh BOOM

“That is pretty strong…” I comment casually while looking at the trail of destruction at my side. I dodged while his arm was moving. You don’t try to dodge a bullet; you dodge while the finger is pressing the trigger.

I decide to repay him by sending a watermelon-sized fireball in his direction. At this point, I’m getting pretty good with the Pirokinetic powers of the Dragon talisman.

BOOM

I played enough games to know that when using AOE attacks like a fireball, you don’t aim at the target, but a the ground below it… The fireball will explode anyway, and it will be hard to avoid damage.

That is why even when the bald monk got another inscription from the scroll and started levitating to dodge, he was still caught in the shockwave of the blast.

“Aaaarh!” He rolls in the air like an astronaut in zero gravity, his red robe going to his red while… Eww, I saw his… what is the name of that type of underwear again? The type that is just a piece of cloth that one rolls around their crotch.

Whatever… 

Taking advantage of his lack of control, I extend my hand and pin him to a wall with my telekinesis.

“Ugh!” He groans, limbs extended in all directions, incapable of moving a muscle.

“That is pretty disappointing… I thought the Scroll of Hung-Chao that allows for a great variety of powers, almost on par with the talismans, would make a challenge…” I say slowly while floating in front of him. “But I guess having superior speed, reflexes, and a good foundation in general is what separates the winner from the loser when the powers are similar… Don’t neglect your basic training kids.” I laugh while pulling the scroll to me.

Not to brag, but if we compare this skinny old monk with someone like me, the result of the fight is not really any surprise. Even if he is a Chi Monk.

Speed is indeed the best stat. Whatever training he had on Chi, whatever knowledge and spells remain in his bald head, it is all useless when he can’t even move an inch to use them.

“Hm? I can’t read these symbols…” I comment while trying to read the scroll. There are eight main inscriptions that must be the spells that one can use. Not as much as the talismans, but pretty good. “Tell me what it says…” I put the scroll in his face, my finger hovering over the first symbol.

“Never!” He shouts stubbornly.

“...” Okay, then… I can simply do what I do with every game that I don’t want to read the descriptions, just use it and see what it does.

Crack

So I unceremoniously break his fragile neck with telekinesis.

His eyes were bulging out of disbelief after the split second he realized what I had done before he died. Looking at his expression filled with unwillingness, I’m pretty sure he would fold if I did as much as bend his pinky in a strange direction.

But my patience is getting thin in this kid cartoon world.

“I almost did everything I came to do here, but there’s still more than half a year for my next jump… It can’t be that I will be stuck here to deal with Shendu’s demon siblings, right?”

Nope. Not dealing with that shit with no reward. 

Let’s end this storyline now!

I open my list and the search bar to the key to end this trouble before it even started. 

“Pan’Ku Box…”

……………………………………….