guigar

Glue Porn

Added 2015-09-22 13:06:35 +0000 UTC

So, I was helping my 9-year-old son with a diorama his teacher assigned over summer vacation... and loathing every minute of it. I took to Facebook to vent my spleen. As you do. I wrote:

Can I ask... what purpose does assigning a diorama serve? ...Besides determine my "fuck it, I need scotch" line? (For those of you scoring at home, that line is somewhere between "WHY WON'T THIS GLUE COME OUT I FIXED THE DAMNED NOZZLE IT SHOULD BE COMING OUT" and said bottle of glue launching into its Peter North impersonation.)

Only, I didn't hit send. Sometimes when I write really funny/inappropriate stuff like that on Facebook, my wife gets a little uncomfortable. So I edited it to a watered-down version.

...And immediately sat down to draw this cartoon. Problem is, this is one of those jokes that works better in a paragraph than it does in a cartoon. One of my options was to have the "camera" pan in over the last two panels to reveal that it was "Peter North Brand Glue." But that didn't seem to do the trick. Another idea was to have the exact same sequence as above, but instead of the punchline, the glue bottle is seen smoking a cigarette in the last panel.

The version you see above was the strongest, in my opinion, of the different versions that occurred to me. If it made you smile then that goddamned diorama wasn't in vain.